Better With Ben

by Casey McMillin

  The group in the kitchen was Hannah, Molly, Nick, and this guy named Trip who grew up with Jason and Nick. Trip played in a popular local ska band called The Shifty Seven. They hired Hannah to draw them in cartoon form, and Trip was sporting the T-shirt that was made from her design.

  Taylor and Gina approached the group in the kitchen when they walked in. She was slightly disappointed that Ben wasn't there even though Molly and Nick had arrived. She hoped he was still going come. Wouldn't he call or text if he couldn't make it? She assumed he would, but didn't have time to really dwell on it since it was time to smile and make conversation.

  "Those shirts came out so cute," Taylor said, pointing to Trip's chest.

  "Aw, have you not seen them yet?" Hannah said, reaching out to hug Taylor and then Gina.

  "No, I've seen the picture, but never as a T-shirt. That looks awesome."

  "What happened there," Trip said, pointing to her arm. She was wearing a long sleeve shirt and the cast was pretty inconspicuous but he felt it when she hugged him.

  "Oh, I just fell and fractured it," she said.

  Trip sucked air in through his teeth like it must have been painful then he turned around so she could see the back of the T-shirt they'd been talking about. Right in the middle of the upper back were the words The Shifty Seven in small, hand-drawn bubble letters. It was obviously a continuation of Hannah's trademark R. Crumb style.

  "I love it," Taylor said, thankful that he didn't ask any more about her broken arm. She looked at Hannah. "I think I might join a band just so you can make us a T-shirt."

  They all laughed, but Hannah and Molly got an especially big kick out of it because Taylor couldn't carry a tune to save her life.

  For the next twenty minutes or so, Taylor was busy with making conversation. A few people from the coffee shop and a few more record label people showed up, and the groups started to mix with each other. Drinks were poured and appetizers were consumed, and even though Taylor had ample opportunity, she never asked Molly where her brother was or if he was coming.

  Several people trickled down to the basement game room. Taylor walked down with Hannah and Jason, but Nick, Molly, Cam, and a few others were already in there. Two guys from RCA were holding pool cues and there was a game of darts being played by Cam, Molly, or Nick, or all three. There was a sectional sofa on the opposite side of the room. One girl was sitting on the edge of it staring intently at the screen of her phone, looking like she was answering an important email.

  Taylor, Jason, and Hannah went over to the area between the pool table and dartboard where there were a couple tables and some barstools.

  Cam made a disapproving sound as Taylor went to sit in one of them. "I need a partner," he said. "You have to be my witness that these two are cheating."

  "We are not," Molly said.

  "You just suck at darts, dude," Nick said.

  Cam gave Taylor a pleading look that said see what I have to deal with? "Please come help me." He held out the darts in her direction and she stepped off of the barstool she had just gotten settled on. She had on ballet flats and she wasn't very tall to begin with, so it was more of a jump than a step, but she got down off the stool either way.

  "I'm out. He's got a ringer," Molly said.

  She was only kidding, but Nick still said, "Oh, come on. We're totally gonna take them."

  Nick had no idea how good Taylor was at darts. She'd been in a lot of bars in her life, and had been playing darts since she was a kid.

  Jason had some hi-tech jukebox, and a Hank Williams Sr. song was playing. Cam was singing along with it. He did that sometimes when he was drinking and a song he particularly liked came on. Taylor watched him thinking it was kind of cool that she was playing darts and getting a private concert with the one and only Cam Bishop. It was another one of those started from the bottom moments where she felt proud and excited at how far she'd come.

  Chapter 15

  Cam and Taylor were beating Molly and Nick, but the level of smack talking was at an all-time high for both sides.

  The game was about half-finished when Ben entered the room. Taylor was hyper aware of people coming down the stairs. Several people had come and gone since she'd been down there, but when she realized the person coming this time was Ben, she got really nervous. She was afraid her now-shaking hands would be obvious when she went to throw her darts.

  Ben, in all his tough warrior-guy glory, walked into the room and took a seat at one of the barstools near Hannah and Jason. Taylor watched as he greeted them. She tried to focus on the game, but she was preoccupied with stealing glances at Ben. She had to find out if he was the same guy she remembered.

  A few seconds after he sat down, he casually scanned the room. His gaze met Taylor's and they locked for what was probably 4 or 5 seconds but to Taylor seemed like forever. How could she continue on with the game and smack talk when she just wanted to go over there and talk to Ben? She told herself that was a little overboard and she should be cool and play it off like seeing him wasn't a big deal. She convinced herself to keep her head in the game, which was good because it was her turn. Oh shit, it's my turn. How will I ever throw the darts at a target with Ben watching me?

  "Do it Tay!" Cam said.

  Taylor smiled inwardly, secretly hoping Ben was jealous at the familiarity in Cam's voice. She didn't look at Ben to see his reaction even though her curiosity almost got the best of her. She just smiled to herself and imagined that he was reacting very jealously—probably staring a hole through Cam.

  They were playing a game where you start with a certain number of points and subtract each person's score. The first team to zero wins. Taylor used her three darts to decrease the score by 56 points, a feat that drew high fives from Cam. It wasn't her best effort, but she was happy with it considering her nerves.

  She didn't know where to stand when she was waiting for her next turn. Ben was on the opposite side of where she'd been standing through the entire game, and she knew people would notice if she walked over there. She really wanted to, but she didn't know if it would be awkward.

  She went back to the spot by Molly where she'd been standing. She'd already had a beer, but decided to take it easy and instead of having a second, was working on a glass of ice water. She grabbed it from the shelf and took a sip of it from the side even though there was a straw. She needed to get a piece of ice to counteract the threat of hot blood rushing to her cheeks. Don't blush. It's just a guy. Calm your nerves.

  It had only been a few seconds, but Taylor played it off as long as she could—she just had to take a peek at Ben. She let her eye roam to the place he was sitting. His eyes were already trained on her when she found him. They stared at each other for a few seconds before one corner of his mouth lifted in a secret little wry grin. He cocked his head back almost imperceptibly.

  Was he calling her over there? It was such a slight movement that Taylor wasn't about to take off in a sprint or anything. She narrowed her eyes just slightly and he answered by doing the same thing.

  They did a playful little dance of barely perceptible facial expression exchanges. He finally lifted his hands just slightly in a gesture that clearly said, "What? Aren't you gonna come over here?"

  At least that's what she thought it meant.

  "I'll be right back," she told Molly. She walked behind Nick who was taking his turn. "I thought you changed your mind," she said, approaching Ben. She stared into his amber eyes, feeling comforted by them instantly. He had smiling eyes—the kind that looked good squinting.

  "I had to wait for a phone call," he said. "They just told me sometime between six and eight, and of course it was at the last minute. Ben stared at her unabashed. He hadn't been able to take his eyes off of Taylor since he walked in, and now that she was in close range, it was even worse. She looked amazing. Whatever she'd done with her hair made her beautiful features stand out even more. She was wearing black leggings with a subtle snakeskin print, and a pale pink loose fitting blouse.
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  She reached up to adjust her hair at the same time that Ben reached out to pinch at her side, his gentle pinch landed on her ribs, and she instantly dropped her hand, laughing. He reached out again, this time taking a piece of her shirt in his hand and giving it a little tug in his direction.

  Her eyes met his and she took a step closer to him. They weren't touching, but they were now really close. "I thought you were gonna come back a changed man," she said. Maybe she thought the trip would have hardened him somehow, because she was relieved to see the same kind eyes staring back at her.

  "Changed how?"

  "I don’t know, maybe I thought you'd be dressed like Batman."

  He smiled. "The cape and everything?"

  "Maybe just the mask."

  "You into masks?" She laughed. "I guess if it was the right mask. I'm not trying to wear a hockey mask or Ronald Reagan or anything."

  "Taylor come on," she heard Cam say.

  She gave Ben an apologetic look before going back to the game even though she was glad to have been called away. Nothing like being beckoned by Cam Bishop while you're trying to make a good impression.

  Taylor took a second to position herself and aim at the board. She took a deep breath and threw the first dart for a triple seven. The second landed in the little green ring that lined the bull's eye, drawing a whistle from Cam. The third landed in the double twenty space.

  "Eighty-six, baby," Cam said, high-fiving her.

  She didn't look right away, but imagined this made Ben really jealous. She decided not to waste any time pretending to wonder whether Ben wanted her over there or not. She walked up to him after each turn, getting two or three minutes of conversation in before it was her turn again.

  Soon, the game was over, with Taylor and Cam's team coming out on top. Nick and Molly asked for a rematch, but Taylor declined to play again. She grabbed what was left of her water, and the little over the shoulder bag she'd brought to carry her wallet and phone.

  She smiled as she approached the stool where Ben was sitting, and he smiled back as he got to his feet. "I was gonna head upstairs," he said.

  "Is that in invitation to go with you?"

  "It's not just a declaration."

  "Then yes, I guess."

  "Yes you'll come?"

  "Sure."

  Taylor had no idea what to expect from a trip upstairs. There was a stocked bar downstairs, so she knew it wasn't just because he wanted to get a drink, and his sister and most of their other close friends were in the basement, so she had no idea why he was headed up there.

  "Where are you taking me?" she asked as they walked up the stairs.

  Ben glanced back at her with a little smile playing on his lips. "Just upstairs to get some food." Food. She hadn't thought of food. How could she with all the flips her stomach was doing?

  Ben and Taylor didn't leave each other's side for the next two hours. Conversation flowed easily between them. One of them would ask a question and they'd talk about it until they got off on a whole tangent about something totally unrelated. They learned a lot about each other's likes and dislikes during the course of the evening, and Taylor caught herself really enjoying his company. She loved everything about Ben. He was a big, tough guy with kind, smiling eyes, and the contradiction was beautiful.

  Even though they'd been inseparable, they'd managed to go through just about the entire evening without making physical contact. Taylor wondered why he had refrained from touching her, thinking maybe he was waiting on her to make the first move. That was the guy's job, right?

  They were sitting next to each other on the sectional sofa in the basement watching the action in the game room and talking, their legs barely brushing. Ben sat up to talk to Jason who was sitting at the other end. He gestured with his hand as he was talking and as he let it drop, he rested it on Taylor's thigh for a few seconds before removing it. His hand was so warm and big on her leg that even though it had only been there a second, she missed it when he took it off. She looked at him, hoping he'd put it back where it was.

  Apparently, he wasn't finished with his conversation with Jason, because he leaned forward again and said something else to him. When he did, he scooted closer to Taylor. It wasn't a motion other people noticed, but it meant their legs were now officially touching, and Taylor felt like she could just close her eyes and enjoy the feeling of finally having him so close.

  His conversation with Jason continued. They were talking about sports. She had no idea what they were saying but it sounded like Ben knew what he was talking about. They might as well have been speaking Greek with how distracted Taylor was.

  The feel of his leg against hers set her off on a sequence of thoughts. She imagined what would happen if she hopped up and sat on his lap. In her fantasy, she could just do it and no one in the room would even think twice or look at them funny. She imagined him wrapping his big arms around her waist to hold her in place. She'd stay like that for a while, then without warning, he'd thrust upward so she could feel the hardness that was just beneath the fabric of his jeans. Taylor closed her eyes for a few seconds, imagining grinding against him. Her body flexed imperceptibly at the mental image of settling herself on his lap. The quiver that ran through her most sensitive areas was very real even though she wasn't really on his lap and none of this was really happening.

  Taylor could hear him talking to Jason, but she was totally preoccupied with her fantasy. In her mind, Ben was holding her in place by the waist while he pressed upward grinding against her. The warmth of his very real leg against hers made the fantasy seem even more real. For the next several seconds, Taylor let her imagination run free.

  Sure, she had an incredibly vivid imagination, but—was it possible to have an orgasm without being touched? Taylor sat by him on the couch thinking she might be about to have one. Just sitting next to this guy was enough to bring her body to the place where it felt like it was teetering on the edge. She let herself hang suspended in this blissful state for a few long seconds before forcing herself to come back to the present.

  That was something she'd never done. She'd been turned on before, but never to the point of being that close to orgasm. She took a few deep breaths, being careful not to make the rise and fall of her chest too obvious.

  Ben was still talking to Jason, but throughout the exchange, had leaned more heavily into Taylor. She wanted to touch him—put a hand on his thigh, anything. When he finished whatever he was saying to Jason, he turned to Taylor.

  "What are you doing after this?" It was the first time all night they brought up the topic. Taylor's only plan was to go home—and maybe not even that. Hannah told her she could just crash in one of the spare bedrooms there at Jason's if she wanted.

  She shrugged. "I might just hang here," she said. "Jason's got about ten bedrooms and I'm not working tomorrow."

  "I'm not working either. You wanna hang out?"

  "Tomorrow?"

  Her stunned expression made him laugh.

  "Yeah. Or tonight, or whenever."

  She smiled. "I think we should definitely hang," she said. "I'll have to call you tomorrow afternoon because I promised my little brother I'd go see them in the morning."

  "You have a little brother?"

  "Two actually."

  Ben's eyes widened surprised she hadn't mentioned it.

  "Two little sisters too," she added.

  "Are you serious?"

  "Most of us have different dads, but yes. Jack's fifteen, Abby's eleven, Alexis is ten—Abby and Lexie have the same dad—and then little Henry's six."

  "And they live in Nashville?" Ben asked. He was honestly a little surprised that with all the time he spent with Taylor she hadn't mentioned having siblings.

  She must have picked up on his curiosity. "I love my baby brothers and sisters so much," she explained, "and I try to do as much for them as I can. I go over there a couple of times a week. But my mom is a negative person and it's hard for me to be around her very much without fe
eling like I should give everything up and just move back home with them. She doesn't mean to hurt me, but she inadvertently tries to convince me I belong in the same life she has, and I'm just not trying to hear that right now. Anyway, I go for the kids, and I try to bring groceries and toilet paper out there since I know sometimes she doesn't make the wisest choices with her paychecks."

  "Can I go with you?"

  "Huh?"

  "Tomorrow," Ben said. "Can I go with you to see your family?"

  Taylor laughed. "No," she said. She regarded him with an expression that said she couldn't believe he was even asking.

  "Why not?"

  "Because. Because of what I just told you. I don't have a normal family."

  "So?"

  "So, I'm not taking you to the craphole I grew up in."

  "Why not?"

  "Because you're gonna feel differently about me when you see it."

  "No I won't."

  Taylor laughed. "Oh trust me, you will," she said.

  He tilted his head slightly and gave her a sincere stare. "Please?" he said.

  She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Just call me in the morning if you're up and maybe you can ride over there with me," she said. She was lying through her teeth—just trying to get him to leave her alone about it. There was no way in hell she was going to bring him to her mom's house. Her mom's boyfriend, Charles, was some biker dude (and not even in a cool, hot way—but a gross biker dude who was awkward to talk to). Yeah, Ben would not be going with her, no way no how.

  "If you don't end up coming with me in the morning, we should definitely hang in the afternoon. I'm off work all day tomorrow, and it's supposed to be a really pretty day—warm enough to get outside."

  Ben didn't have time to respond. Gina was approaching from the stairs, looking like she had an agenda.

  "Hey, I'm gonna head home," she said. "Did you ever decide if you were going to spend the night?"