Animal

by Paul Jones

  With a face that looked like her make-up had been jetted on through a fire hose, she waddled up to Tom. ‘I’m going to make a formal complaint about the way you handled my cousin.’

  Tom rolled his eyes like he’d heard this a million times before.

  ‘There was no need for any of that, he’s not a violent person and didn’t deserve any of that, it was well out of order.’

  Tom quickly hit back. ‘Yeah, and so was he for attacking one of my men, you’re lucky we don’t ban him indefinitely for that.’

  ‘He didn’t hit him, he was just trying to help that’s all.’

  ‘Listen, he tried to land a blow on one of my men, I saw it, we all bloody saw it, so stop trying to make excuses.’

  ‘No he didn’t.’

  Tom couldn’t tolerate this stupid woman any longer. ‘Just go away you silly bitch, you wouldn’t know your arse from a hole in the ground.’

  The woman’s jaw dropped open. ‘I beg your pardon?’

  ‘You heard.’ Tom turned away from her, but she tried to get in his face.

  ‘How dare you speak to me like that.’

  Tom was really beginning to lose it now. ‘Listen, just piss off, OK? You people you’re all the same. You’re quick to turn your cheek when one of your own are dishing it out, but when they get a taste of it back, you don’t damn well like it, do you? Now for the last time, piss off!’

  The woman was speechless, then the lad she was trying to stick up for, tried to drag her away himself, and that seemed to set her off again. Tom shook his head and watched as the lad hauled her away like a dog owner trying to drag his vicious mutt from a fight.

  When she had gone, the other doormen started to tease him, Charlie getting his oar in first. ‘Won’t be getting a Christmas kiss off her then,’ he scoffed, and everyone chuckled.

  ‘Fat bitch,’ Tom seethed, then quickly changed his tune when he saw Snoopy (the doormen’s grass) jogging over from the taxi stand towards them.

  Snoopy made an amused frown. ‘Who’s your friend?’

  Tom’s look said, don’t even go there, then he pulled Snoopy to one side away from the other doormen. ‘So what have you got?’

  Snoopy waited for a couple of lads to pass by, then disclosed what he knew.

  ‘The chap who I got to do the deal with the drug gang always goes to the Ship Inn pub on a Sunday night for a quiet drink.’

  ‘Alone?’ Tom asked.

  ‘Well, he usually has one or two with him, but that’s when he’s most exposed, that’s when he’s least covered.’

  ‘OK, cheers.’ Tom tapped him, and checked that no one else was listening.

  ‘Don’t forget, we’ll need you there to point him out to us. You’ll get a little extra present in Santa’s stocking this year. Keep us informed.’

  Snoopy flicked the end of his nose with his thumb, a habit he always did whenever things were going right for him. Leaving Tom, he had a bit of a joke with the other bouncers before slinking off inside for a few drinks.

  Meanwhile, Tom sidled up to Charlie and said out of the corner of his mouth.

  ‘Sunday nights, this guy who got that gang for us goes to the Ship Inn pub in Rhos-on-Sea, we’ll get it sorted this week. Hopefully we might be able to work out a deal so we can get those scouse maniacs off our backs once and for all.’

  ‘Do you know who he is?’ asked Charlie.

  ‘No, Snoopy’s going to introduce us.’

  Mike just happened to pick up the end of their conversation. ‘So, what are you going to get sorted?

  Tom gave Charlie a sly tap to keep him quiet and thought up an excuse quickly. ‘The Wilkinson gang, one of the leader’s will be there on Sunday night at the Ship Inn so me and Charlie are going down there to see if we can call some sort of a truce.’

  ‘Better give Geoff and the others notice.’

  ‘Naw, I think we’ll leave them out of this one.’ Tom replied.

  Mike frowned confused. ‘What about the team?’

  ‘I think we might be able to sort this one out without the team.’

  ‘Are you sure about that?’

  ‘Yes, Mike.’ Tom snapped. ‘And don’t you go mentioning it to them either.’

  Mike didn’t like the sound of that, but judging by Tom’s reaction, he kept quiet.

  *

  Buried deep in Christmas tinsel and coloured baubles, Geoff was sitting in front of the TV vegging-out to yet another adaptation of A Christmas Carol. That was until his interest was diverted by the conversation Jan was having on the phone with her mother. Apparently, Jan’s father had caught a bout of the flu, so their annual Christmas dinner get-together would have to be cancelled. What a shame, Geoff mumbled to himself relieved that he wouldn’t have to sit at her parent’s house for a whole four hours with a smile glued on to his face, listening to how cute Jan was when she was a baby. Or hearing the same old boring story about how Jan was always expected to marry a musician with truck loads of money.

  Geoff sat listening with one ear as Jan promised to ring first thing in the morning to find out how her father was. She clicked off the phone and tutted with disappointment. ‘That’s a shame, poor dad with the flu over Christmas.’

  ‘Yeah, shame.’ Geoff had to bite his lip to hide his amusement, and Jan picked up on his sarcasm.

  ‘Oh yeah, you really sound broken-hearted.’

  ‘I am, honestly; that’s spoilt my whole Christmas now.’

  Jan gave him a waspish look. ‘It can be dangerous to get the flu at his age you know?’

  ‘I know, I know,’

  Jan’s shoulders sank dejectedly, and she sighed, ‘we’ll just have to have our own quiet little Christmas get-together, won’t we?’ Then she nipped through to the kitchen to make a cuppa.

  Geoff waited until she had left the room, then broke into a silent cheer.

  Jan shouted through. ‘I know you’re laughing.’

  *

  CHRISTMAS DAY

  By midday, most of the houses across Britain were cluttered up with Christmas wrapping paper and empty cardboard boxes. Kids were fighting over their toys, and mums were already in the kitchen steaming out the place cooking Christmas dinner.

  However, being DINKYS Geoff and Jan were spared the burden of parenthood, and the threat of bankruptcy that came with it at this time of the year. Alternatively, they both enjoyed a quiet modest morning opening up their handful of gifts and kicking back with a glass of brandy. And there wasn’t a screaming kid in sight.

  Later on that afternoon, Jan had planned to have a small buffet for the two of them, and this suddenly gave Geoff an idea.

  ‘Listen, Jan, being that we’re not making such a big thing about Christmas dinner, how about if I ask Will to join us this afternoon for our buffet?’

  Jan’s face froze in mid-sip. ‘I don’t know, Geoff. Do you really think that’d be a good idea?’

  ‘Yeah, why not? I mean he’ll be sitting there alone in his flat now, and we’re not doing anything special, so why not ask him over? It’ll only be for a few hours, and it’ll be the perfect chance for you to meet him.’

  Geoff could see that she wasn’t completely comfortable about this, but he worked on her until finally she relented. ‘Besides, he might not even want to come,’ he said, draining the last of his brandy and standing up ready to go.

  Jan almost choked on her drink. ‘What, you mean right now?’

  ‘Well, yeah, I’ll have to go and pick him up, won’t I? And if I phone him he’s just going to say no.’

  ‘So why force him to come then?’

  ‘Because if I go down there personally, he’ll know I’m actually making an effort and not doing it out of moral obligation. You see, he’ll say no because he doesn’t want to intrude, but deep down I think he’d be glad of the company.’

  ‘OK, Doctor Freud.’

  Geoff humoured her, then went to fetch the car keys from the top of the hall cabinet. Meanwhi
le, Jan enjoyed one last sip of her brandy before preparing to tidy-up for their imminent guest.

  Geoff pressed the doorbell to Will’s flat and within a minute it was answered. Straight away, Geoff noticed the slight swelling on Will’s eye, and the thought of his old pal ever getting a shiner shocked him to the core.

  ‘What happened?’

  For a second Will had completely forgotten about the injury.

  ‘Oh, yeah, come on in. I’ll tell you inside.’

  Inside the flat, Will went to sit on the arm of the couch while Geoff stood waiting to hear what had happened.

  ‘Stacey’s ex paid me a visit the other day, and thanked me personally for trying to steal her off him.’

  ‘Cheeky bastard, did you…?’ Geoff gesticulated with his fist.

  Will smiled back amused. ‘No I didn’t do anything.’

  Annoyed at this, Geoff asked why.

  ‘Because that was his intention all along, it was a trap.’

  ‘A trap?’ Geoff puzzled.

  ‘Yeah, he wanted me to retaliate so he could get me done for assault, and then ruin my chances with Stacey.’

  ‘So who the hell is this guy?’

  Will shrugged. ‘Just an obsessive ex who is willing to try anything to get her back.’

  ‘And does Stacey know about all this?’

  ‘Oh yes, she’s pissed off about it too.’

  Geoff rattled his car keys with agitation. ‘Want us to sort him out for you?’

  Will smiled appreciatively. ‘Not necessary, Geoff. In fact he actually did me a favour.’

  ‘How’s that?’

  ‘Well, the simple fact that I didn’t respond proved to Stacey that I have changed.’

  Geoff saw his point of view, then Will picked up his tray of food and went to sit at the window table, he nodded towards the couch. ‘Have a seat, Geoff.’

  Feeling a bit guilty for disturbing his meal, Geoff did as he was told.

  ‘So to what do I owe this pleasure on Christmas Day? Shouldn’t you be tucking into your own lunch round about now?’

  Geoff noticed Will’s pitiful plate of supernoodles and replied, ‘Stacey’s parents called off the dinner because of flu, so Jan and I were wondering if you would like to join us for a little buffet this afternoon?’

  Will’s first reaction was to politely refuse, but being that Geoff made the effort to come all the way down here, he found it difficult to say no.

  ‘You sure about that Geoff? I mean doesn’t Jan mind?’

  ‘No not at all, In fact she’s preparing it all right now.’

  Will gazed down at his plate of supernoodles as if he didn’t want to leave them, and Geoff joked that he could bring them along if he wished. Declining that part of the offer, Will gratefully accepted the invitation, and asked Geoff to give him five minutes to prepare. While he waited, Geoff turned to the TV and started watching the feature film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Perched on top of the TV was one single Christmas card that was obviously sent from Stacey.

  ‘So when is Stacey due back then?’ Geoff asked.

  ‘What’s that, Geoff?’

  Geoff turned around to repeat the question, and caught the gruesome sight of Will’s naked back just before he pulled down a black sweatshirt over it. It was etched with legions of pink scars, and looked like it had been used as a chopping block in a butcher’s shop. Geoff turned back quickly before Will had caught him looking.

  ‘Oh, in about a day or so,’ Will replied.

  To hide the shock of what he’d seen, Geoff asked what Stacey had bought him for Christmas, and Will told him he was wearing it. Geoff looked over again to see him displaying the coal-black fleece jacket.

  ‘Nice.’ He remarked.

  Will tapped his jeans pocket in readiness. ‘All set then?’

  *

  At Geoff’s home, Will was introduced to Jan for the first time, and was surprised at how petite she was. In return Jan appeared a touch unsure about Will’s giant crab tattoo etched across his neck. However, after the customary pleasantries, Geoff took Will into the living room for a glass of wine, while Jan put the finishing touches to the buffet.

  Soon all three of them were sitting at the table in the breakfast room tucking into paper plates of sausage rolls, spring rolls, vol-a-vents etc. As they ate, Jan was content to listen as Geoff and Will chatted about old times, and chuckled about all the scrapes they had gotten into in their youth. Jan even learned a few brow-raising revelations about her so-called squeaky-clean husband.

  Then she asked Will all about Stacey, where she lived, and what plans they had for the future. Although one subject she did keep clear of (much to Geoff’s relief) was about Will’s recent spell in prison, and what crime he actually committed.

  After they had eaten, Will insisted on helping to clear up, and once all that was done, he and Geoff chilled out in front of the box, while Jan finished off in the kitchen. On the TV there was a news report of another fatal stabbing late last night somewhere in Kent, and this started Geoff off.

  ‘Even at Christmas time it doesn’t make a difference to some of these low-lives does it? Do you know I was reading the North Wales Weekly news the other day and there was this story about some knob-head from Colwyn Bay who threw a kitten into a garden with two pit-bull terriers and enjoyed watching them tear it to pieces. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I mean what sort of scum has the mindset to do something like that?’ He remarked, glancing across for Will’s opinion, and saw the troubled expression on his face.

  ‘You don’t know those idiots do you?’ He asked.

  Will woke up. ‘No, no, it just reminded me of something that’s all.’

  At that moment, Jan reappeared, and Geoff reminded her of the terrible kitten incident. Being a die-hard animal lover herself, she recalled how sickened she was by it. ‘That was disgusting. He should be shot for that, I don’t care what anybody says. Just what the hell is happening to our society when people can do such things, especially to poor innocent creatures like that?’

  Will listened to their reactions, but kept his opinions to himself, and soon they drifted on to more pleasant subjects.

  An hour or so later, Will decided it was time to leave, and suggested that the mile walk back to his flat would be a perfect chance to burn off some of his Christmas binge. But Geoff would have none of it. Despite having had consumed a few glasses of wine, he insisted on driving Will back home. Before leaving, Will thanked Jan for having him, and providing such a wonderful spread. Jan smiled back in appreciation and told him that next time he must bring Stacey along with him. Will promised that he would.

  Arriving back at Will’s flat, something was bothering Geoff, and he turned to his friend before he left him. ‘You sure everything was alright before when I mentioned that kitten incident? For a moment you looked like you had taken it quite personal.’

  Will took a very deep breath and uttered. ‘Maybe it’s time you knew the whole truth.’

  Geoff immediately switched off the car’s ignition, and was all ears.

  ‘It reminded me of the incident that got me put away in prison. You see, deep down I’ve always been a big animal lover, cats, dogs, anything with fur and paws. And I’ve never been able to tolerate those who abuse these wonderful creatures. Back during my early courtship with Stacey, we had a black Labrador puppy called Georgie, and at that time we were still living in separate homes. But we decided that Georgie would stay at hers because he would be good company for her when she was alone. And when he grew up he would also be able to look after her and guard her house.’ Will paused as if his hand was on the door handle to a room he really did not wish to enter.

  ‘One day just before I arrived at Stacey’s, Georgie escaped into her front garden without Stacey realising. Suddenly she heard this awful commotion coming from outside, and when she got there…’ Will stalled again, his lip beginning to curl over his front teeth with anger.


  ‘There was this pit-bull dog shaking Georgie around in his mouth like a rag-doll. And watching it, were these two nineteen-or twenty-year-old lads laughing and urging their dog on. Panicking, Stacey rushed over forgetting about the danger and tried to save our pup, and a neighbour, a big chap who saw what was going on, also came over to help. Frantically, Stacey tried to prise our dog from the pit-bull’s jaws, and she remembers looking into Georgie’s eyes and seeing him saying good bye to her with them.’

  A lump stuck in Will’s throat, cutting off his words.

  ‘Jesus.’

  ‘Finally, Stacey and the neighbour managed to get Georgie free despite getting bitten and cut themselves, and all those lads did was march off down the street with their dog back on the leash. Seconds later, I arrived and saw Stacey crying, holding poor Georgie in her arms with blood all over her hands. Then the neighbour told me what had just happened, and where the lads went, and I was off. About a hundred yards down the road, I spotted them, so I drove passed and stopped further down so they wouldn’t know I was coming.’

  ‘What did you do?’

  Will, could only shake his head helplessly. ‘Hell, absolute hell.’

  Geoff waited for Will to find his words.

  ‘First I broke the lads legs so they couldn’t run away, then the dog tried to attack which turned out to be the best thing it could have done for me. As it went for me I grabbed it by putting my hand through its collar and twisting it around so I could strangle it to death. I made those two bastards watch me kill their dog right in front of them. And when I heard them plead for me to stop, I laughed. I laughed because I enjoyed seeing their pain, and I enjoyed seeing them fear what I was going to do to them next. When I dropped the dog’s lifeless carcass in front of them, they knew what they did was wrong, but by then it was too late.’

  Already shocked by what he’d heard, Geoff had to ask. ‘You didn’t kill them did you?’

  Will turned to him with cold, blank eyes. ‘No, but now they’re going to spend the rest of their lives in wheelchairs. And some nights, when they remember what I did to them that day they’re gonna piss their beds.’