Lingus

by Mariana Zapata

  "Kat?" Tristan's hoarse voice asked from above my head. His body stirred before arching against me in a stretch.

  "Hey," I said, my voice still thick with sleep. "I don't remember falling asleep."

  The arm thrown across me was now moving up and down my back, the palm smoothing over the material covering the area from my shoulders to spine. "I remember you started falling asleep. Your head was bobbing back and forth, so I moved to put your head on my shoulder but that's pretty much it. You snored again but it seemed like a dream," he groaned against my hair.

  His hand continued sliding up and down my back, detouring to glide upward to touch the crown of my head before smoothing down my hair. I knew I had a ponytail up last night, my hair wasn't down like it should have been which was strange. "Oh," I mumbled, only an inch away from his chest. My hand was still asleep, but I could not have cared any less.

  "You're warm," he said in a soft voice. "You're like my own little electric blanket."

  I wanted to ask him if he slept on couches with girls regularly, but something told me that I already knew the answer. He mentioned to me last night that I was the third female to ever come over to his house; the first and second being his mom and grandmother. His words from nights before when he assured me that his bed was clean and that he wasn't a whore rang through my brain as a reminder. Maybe I should have been less trusting because he could have been lying, but I highly doubted it. If it really was hard for him to not only have friends but girlfriends too because of the porn, there would be no way he'd invite someone over who only knew him as Robby Lingus.

  "What are you thinking?" he asked after my silence.

  "I was thinking about you and your house." I answered him honestly. "You never bring people over?"

  "Only Calum, some people from school, my family, and you," he answered. "Why?"

  I wanted to ask him, but should I? "Just wondering," I mumbled against him as I pressed my forehead to the hard muscle of his chest. "Do you mind if I ask you some personal stuff?" I paused. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to."

  He freaking laughed. "I've seen you dig in your ass, I've washed the PMS off your clothes, and seen you—," he hesitated, "in the bathroom. I really don't think you can ask me anything that's so personal I wouldn't answer, goldie."

  I registered the fact that he avoided saying that he'd seen me naked, I'd mull over that later on. "You've really never brought a girlfriend over here?"

  "Kat," he sighed. "My last two girlfriends didn't even know my real name. They thought my name was Robby."

  I had a feeling that I was starting to go into territory that I didn't want to get into, but I knew for the sake of our friendship that I should know some things. I could tell anyone everything and anything about Nicole, Zoey, and Josh. So, wouldn't the same be expected for Tristan at some point? Maybe I didn't want to know the answers but I should. "They were in the err, adult film industry too?"

  His heavy hand started doing laps on my back again. "Yeah," he answered. "One of them was the reason I got into it. It was her idea, actually. She came up to me at a bar and asked me if I was interested... Lexy was... I mean, she was hot as shit, so how was I going to tell her no? She didn't even ask me for my name that night, and by the time she did, Calum had already come up with Robby. We only stayed together a few months before she got all psycho on me for getting offers to be with other girls. Then, there was Ashley a few months after Lexy, and that lasted maybe a month or two. I met her on a scene, too."

  I couldn't help the jealousy that spiked through my spine and nervous system. Two porn star girlfriends? I’m not sure how I didn’t projectile vomit at the thought. I wanted to push him away from me and climb off the couch but I didn't. It was like he could sense my unease because he started stroking my hair from the crown down, his fingers brushing through the strangely untangled locks.

  "I guess I knew there wasn't anything serious going on with either one of them since I never told them my real name, huh? It's hard to lie about what you do and what your life is like when you're away from L.A—," he continued. "Ashley was almost two years ago now, I guess. I started in the industry a year before that, right before I started law school."

  "Hmm," I managed to mumble out, half in a daze with his hands and half in thought at his words. How could he have gone through having a relationship with someone who didn't really even know him? Did that even count as a relationship when so much was fabricated, I wondered. "Zoey has been doing it for four years."

  "I can't believe you know Zoey," he said, and I felt hot breath against the top of my head. "Is she the reason you went to the convention?"

  I snorted at his question, wishing I could blame sweet Zoey for my visit to the porn convention. "No. Nikki and I are just curious pervs." The tingling in my hand started to get worse when it felt like needles bit into my skin. In an effort to pull my hand out from under his ribs, my shoulder fell back, and I expected it to land against the couch cushion but of course, no such luck.

  I was flat on my back, sucking in a breath at the impact of falling off the fucking couch. I could hear Tristan laughing from his spot above me; the asshole didn't even bother to make sure I was okay before he was laughing his ass off. Two ragged breaths later, a semi-composed Tristan hung off the side of the couch while looking at me through wide, amused eyes. "Are you okay?"

  "I will be," I mumbled, trying to push myself up to sitting position. Even though the couch seemed pretty wide originally, between the back cushions, Tristan's lean frame, and my body: we took up the entire width of it.

  He sat up with his legs thrown over the side, and two hands extended out in my direction to help me up. "C'mon, I'll let you make me some pancakes to make up for having to hear you snore all night."

  As I was getting up, I noticed my ponytail holder on top of the coffee table.

  Chapter 25

  Zoey and Nicole were in tears and gasping for air in response to my humiliation.

  Bitches. That's exactly what they were. Two bitches.

  "I don't even know why I'm friends with either one of you," I grumbled in their direction.

  We were over at Nicole's loft on Saturday night, getting ready to head out and see an outdoor concert that Eva, Zoey's friend, was dancing at. I'd decided to tell them about my period incident at Tristan's house two days before and in response, they were making noises that could have signaled that they were either crying or dying. I couldn't have cared less which one by that point. I mean a girl can only handle so much laughter at her own expense. I did have to give them credit though, they managed to hold themselves together until I got to the part about falling off the couch at least. I had left his house hours later, after making pancakes and sitting on his porch for a good hour until his neighbor, Mrs. Goldberg, came out and scared Tristan away.

  Three minutes later, Nicole was pawing at her face and gasping for air. "Only you, Kat," she managed to sigh out.

  "Shut up," was the only response I could think of. Yes, it was embarrassing to freaking bleed all over myself in front of Tristan, but oh well. It was done, right?

  Zoey leaned over the couch to pinch my cheek. "You are too much."

  I rolled my eyes and got up, noticing that it was five minutes past when we needed to leave. "Let's go or we won't make it in time."

  My blonde and black haired friends hustled out of the door after me, loading into Zoey's little Volkswagen to head over to the venue. I was in the front seat while Nikki took the back; Zoey was a notoriously absent-minded and reckless driver. A couple years back, after a particularly horrifying cut-off, Nikki swore to never ride in the front seat with Zoey again. Despite all the exercises that I learned in yoga to control my breathing, I'd find myself panting and pressing the toes on my right foot down like I could brake the car myself each time Zoey was behind the wheel.

  "How's it going with Calum, Nikki?" I asked to distract myself from the trip.

  We'd kept out conversations to an absolute minimum over the w
eek, so I really had no clue how things were going. "A-fucking-mazing. He's so delicious and he's really sweet too. I'm so used to dating pricks that it's weird for me to accept that he isn't a dick like every other dick before him. He told me that I'm special," she snorted out the last word like she wasn't sure whether to accept it or not.

  I wanted to tell her what Tristan said, but I promised him I wouldn't. "Maybe you are, Nik."

  "Ehh," she said softly from the back, but I could hear the hesitation in her voice. "He's leaving next week to go film a couple of movies so..." she trailed off. "Tristan is going with him, too."

  I'd just spent more than twenty-four hours with Tristan less than two days ago, and he never mentioned going to film but I could only blame myself. What did I expect? For his scenes or movies to get filmed using CGI? Luckily, it was Zoey who voiced the question that was floating around in my head. "Are you going to keep seeing him once he comes back?"

  "I think so. I like him and not just for his gigantic dick. He's nice, and he's funny," she said. I knew Nicole. I knew she wanted to say more, but she'd always been very private about a lot of things. Whatever internal battle was raging under her skin right then was only for her to take on. I wanted to tell her I had an idea what she was feeling and going through but I wouldn't. Nikki had always needed to figure things out on her own.

  My phone vibrated from its spot in my purse, the chime was muffled. 'Magellan' showed up on the screen.

  I think I want a dog.

  Well, that was random.

  Get one, then.

  Go with me to the shelter?

  Sure.

  I have to go back to work on Monday, so maybe after I get off?

  I have plans.

  Total lie. I had nothing to do.

  Liar. Monday after work. I'll pick you up.

  "What's that smile on your face for?" Zoey teased from her seat.

  Did I have a dumb look on my face that gave me away? Probably. "Just making plans, Slutey."

  She looked at me out of the corner of her eye as a sad smile crossed her features. "Still no progress?"

  I only had the heart to shake my head. There was no progress on the romantic front. He treated me like a sister except for the whole-sleeping-on-the-couching-while-pressed-up-against-each-other thing. The ponytail holder incident was still bothering me. Using deductive reasoning, I was pretty positive he took the elastic out of my hair because I knew I wouldn't have done it in my sleep, but why would he do that? I wasn’t naïve, I noticed that he flirted with me sometimes, and I had caught him looking at me in a way that was definitely more than friendly but that was it.

  "He's probably confused, Booger. Give him some time... but not too much time," Nicole piped up from the backseat. "You can't wait around for him forever."

  I wanted to tell them that I wasn't waiting for him, but I guessed I kind of was. I was just settling for taking what I could get from him. "Yeah," was my lame reply.

  Zoey decided to be merciful and blast the radio a moment later. It was a pop music extravaganza with her singing at the top of her lungs for the next twenty minutes until we made it to the venue. Eva was dancing with a modern company, and we sat out in the humid warmth, enjoying the hour and a half of performances. Zoey was beaming every time her friend appeared onstage which was too cute. I made a note to ask her later about Eva because something told me she really liked her.

  The three of us were shuffling down our aisle when a voice from behind stopped us. "Zoey Star?"

  Zoey turned around first, and then Nikki and I followed. A gorgeous girl with chestnut hair and striking blue eyes was standing two rows behind. She had gigantic fake boobs that were barely holding themselves back from popping out of her shirt. I could hear Zoey snicker before she talked. "Hi... Ashley... What a surprise."

  Ashley.

  You've got to be kidding me. She better not be the same Ashley that Tristan had just told me about. What were the fucking chances?

  "—Visiting my cousins for the weekend before I go back to the Valley," I caught the end of what enor-boobs said. Her voice was sickly sweet. I hated it. I also wanted to punch her in the fucking face for some reason.

  "Nice. I'm not going back for another two weeks," my inky-haired friend said. I could see the tension in her shoulders as she shot me a look out of the corner of her eye. The look told me that she knew about Ashley and Tristan.

  "Well, it was nice seeing you, Zoey! I should really go find my cousins before they forget about me. Toodles!" Ashley said with a curl of her fingers that I guessed could have been considered a wave.

  Nicole growled right next to me. "Who the hell says toodles?"

  "That cunt-wagon," I said with a point in the direction Ashley walked off in. I considered for a moment that it might have been incredibly childish of me to be so hateful but screw that.

  "You two are some hateful asses," Zoey laughed before pushing me forward. "It's her job, you know?" She tried to defend Ashley, but I had a feeling she was trying to tone down how bitchy we were in. She'd probably been with Calum, too. I had to remember to tell Tristan I'd seen her.

  "She's still a bitch," Nikki and I said at the same time.

  Zoey just rolled her eyes and laughed. "You two kiss your daddies with those mouths?"

  "I do more than kiss your daddy with this mouth," Nicole added with a snort before we all laughed.

  Chapter 26

  I had barely closed the apartment door before I was whipping out my phone to call Tristan.

  "Hey," he answered, two rings later.

  "Hey! Are you busy?" I asked, knowing he was probably at home doing a big, whopping nothing.

  The goofy man snorted. "Not at all. I'm watching a movie and trying to read. How was the show?"

  "Good! It was fun, and Zoey dropped me off with all of my limbs intact," I told him. He'd already been warned about Zoey's god awful driving skills and the fear she put into my heart each time she was behind the wheel. Then again, I guess I could've offered to drive instead but I didn't.

  "Nice."

  I hesitated for a single moment, trying to decide whether I really wanted to tell him about Ashley or not. I mean, what if he decided he wanted to go see her since she was in town? That thought alone made me want to projectile vomit. Friends. You're friends, I reminded myself. If he saw my ex, I'd want him to tell me. I'd be curious to know whether the guy had gained weight. Ha.

  "So, we were at the venue and this girl screamed at Zoey. Her name was Ashley," I started to say. His response was a low grunting noise, signaling me to continue. "I think it might have been your ex-girlfriend. She was really pretty with huge boobs? Reddish-brown hair and blue eyes?"

  Tristan stayed quiet for a moment. "Did she have an annoying voice?"

  "Is that a trick question?" I asked.

  He chuckled. "Why would it be a trick question?"

  I made a low noise in my throat that sounded amused. "Because she's your ex? Maybe you guys are still friends, I don't know. I don't want to talk shit about someone you're still fond of!" I laughed.

  "Kaaaaat," he grumbled, but I could hear amusement in his tone. "We weren't friends. Ever."

  I know he didn't mean for his statement to be a verbal punch to my ovaries but it was. They'd never been friends. Ugh.

  Chapter 27

  "Have you ever had a dog before?" I asked the man also known as Robby Lingus.

  We were sitting in his Audi, heading to the shelter closest to my apartment. Since Saturday night, every other text message he'd sent me had been regarding our trip to look for a dog. Not once did he ever bring up Ashley again but the damage had been done. My stomach hurt for hours after we'd hung up, and I decided right then that I wasn't going to let it bother me any longer.

  So, when the dog related text messages kept coming, I went with it. He admitted to me the day before that he thought of getting one because he was tired of being lonely at his house. I was excited for him. I loved dogs even though I could never admit that to Matlo
ck. The only reason why I didn't have one was because the deposit for a dog at my apartment complex was way too expensive. I managed to get some writing done and was waiting for him on the steps to my building when he pulled up after work.

  "Yeah, I had a dog growing up. Old Gozer was my best friend," he said wistfully.

  I raised my eyebrow at him, recognizing the name. "Please tell me you named him Gozer after the Ghostbusters character." Gozer was the demon-woman at the end of the movie; my dad and I were obsessed with Ghostbusters when I was little. I think he secretly had a man-crush on Dan Akroyd but he'd never officially fess up to it.