Bursting With Love

by Melissa Foster

  “Maybe not like you do, but I do know how much it hurts to lose someone you love and how, no matter what you do, you can’t let that love go. I know that it eats you up inside, and you feel like the person’s right there with you but you just can’t reach them,” she said.

  He pushed away. “How? Wha—”

  Savannah shrugged. “I’ve watched my father grieve for my mother my whole life, and I’ve grieved for her, too,” she admitted.

  Jack let out an angry breath and growled, “You know what you saw, not what he felt.”

  THE HURT AND anger in Jack’s voice sliced through Savannah’s heart like a knife. Her father was an expert at masking the pain of missing her mother, but the longing was evident in everything he did and said. Jack’s pain was raw, visceral, as if his wife’s death left a gaping wound and every breath carried a painful reminder that she was gone. She’d felt how his body had gone rigid when they’d kissed, as if he were scared of the kiss itself, and how his rock-hard body had competing impulses. There was no denying his instant arousal when their hips had come together.

  “Your version of hurt is stubbing your toe on the streets of Manhattan,” he said.

  Savannah narrowed her eyes. “You can be a real bastard, you know that? Watching my father grieve—and never knowing my mother—sucked ass. And pain comes in all forms”—like finding your boyfriend in bed with another woman or having to prove yourself every day in a chauvinistic industry—“none of which are fun.” She took a step forward and looked up at him. The bottom of his chin was peppered with stubble except for an area about an inch long and a quarter inch wide, where a thin white scar had laid claim. Even though she wanted to call him out for acting like an asshole, her heart wondered if it was his pain speaking. She wanted to touch that scar, heal the pain, and reveal the real Jack Remington. Instead, she said, “Thank you for saving me from the bobcat.”

  Savannah focused on the ground before her as she made her way back to the camp—her need to pee forgotten—Jack’s kiss still fresh on her lips, his harsh words battling with the pain she’d seen in his eyes, and her confused heart thundering someplace in between.

  Chapter Five

  SATURDAY MORNING, AIDEN was up with the sun, chattering in his high-pitched voice. Savannah lay in her tent, thinking about the evening before and wishing she could transport home like they could on Star Trek. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. No matter how much she loathed the idea of pretending nothing had happened, or admitting that it had, she had to join the group and face Jack. She touched her lips, remembering the way her body shivered while he kissed her—partly from the fear of seeing the bobcat, but mostly from how good it felt to be wrapped in his big, strong arms with his hot mouth devouring hers. Stop it. No men, remember? She couldn’t even stick to her resolutions for forty-eight hours. That had to be some sort of a record.

  She still had to pee, too, which meant that not only would she have to face Jack, but she’d have to go back in the woods alone and possibly run into the bobcat again. Last night her fear had morphed into some sort of sexual hunger, and she’d been so wrapped up in their kiss that she’d forgotten to ask him if that bobcat might come back. One thing is for sure. No more peeing in the woods alone at night. She gathered her confidence, changed her clothes, and stepped out of her tent.

  “Savannah, I waked up early!” Aiden shouted.

  Savannah winced. She needed an announcement about her whereabouts like she needed a hole in her head. One quick scan of the site told her that Jack was not around.

  “Good morning, Aiden. How’d you sleep?” she asked.

  It always amazed her how much energy children had in the mornings.

  “Good. We heard a big cat last night and I was scared, but Dad said it was just a bobcat, and I’m not afraid of bobcats. It’s not like they’re lions or tigers. My dad could scare away a bobcat. Mom told me all about them this m—”

  Elizabeth put her hand on Aiden’s shoulder. In her jeans and tie-dyed shirt, she looked comfortable and relaxed. She wore a bandanna around her hair, secured beneath her dreadlocks.

  “Sweetie, let’s let Savannah breathe a little. She just woke up, okay?” Elizabeth said to Aiden.

  “Okay, Mom. Can we go to the water?”

  “I’ll take you, buddy.” Lou crossed the campsite from where he’d been stacking wood for the evening’s fire.

  “Have fun. Jack said he’d be back in half an hour,” Elizabeth said. Lou kissed Elizabeth, and she pulled him into a deeper kiss. When Lou and Aiden disappeared over the crest of the hill, Elizabeth said, “With a little one, I gotta get my fill of Lou every chance I get.” She winked at Savannah.

  Pratt popped out of his tent, followed by Josie. Savannah’s jaw dropped. After one night? It dawned on her that she might have been doing the same thing if Jack hadn’t backed off.

  “We’ll go with you, Lou.” Pratt reached behind him for Josie’s hand.

  “Let me grab towels,” Josie said, and she headed to her tent.

  “Nature calls. Be right back.” Savannah slipped into the woods and inspected her surroundings carefully before she chose a spot to take care of her bathroom needs. When she returned to the camp, Elizabeth was waiting for her.

  “I want to go down to the stream, but I didn’t want to leave you alone. Do you want to come with me?” Elizabeth asked.

  Savannah wasn’t used to not showering. She really wanted to get into the water to bathe and wash her hair with the organic shampoo she’d found at the Natural Store. She couldn’t do that around the others.

  “No. It’s okay. I’ll go in a little while,” she answered. She knew Jack wouldn’t allow her to go alone, but once Pratt and Lou were back, she could ask Elizabeth to go with her.

  Twenty minutes later, Savannah had finished organizing her belongings in the tent, and as she was backing out, she heard Jack’s heavy footsteps approach. Butterflies took flight in her stomach. She rolled her eyes, angry with herself for feeling anything after the way he had treated her and wishing she hadn’t enjoyed that kiss so damn much. Okay, Savannah, just get it over with. She took a deep breath and climbed from her tent.

  Feigning a smile, she said, “Good morning.” As if she hadn’t experienced the greatest kiss of her life the night before.

  Jack walked past the tents to the fire pit, not once looking at Savannah.

  “Morning,” he grumbled as he began building a small fire.

  Savannah tried to discern if she was witnessing Jack’s typical morning grogginess, or if he was sincerely going to grumble at her and pretend they hadn’t kissed. I didn’t peg you as a pretender, too. Damn it. I hate pretending.

  “The others went down to the water,” she said.

  He continued silently building the fire.

  “You’re not going to speak to me?” she asked.

  “I said, morning,” he answered.

  Savannah saw the others making their way back up the hill. She went to his side and said in a rushed whisper, “So we’re pretending last night didn’t happen?”

  Jack’s hands stopped midair. He turned his head slowly, and Savannah’s breath caught when she saw his dark, sexy eyes, but the hard set of his jaw negated the desire she thought she’d seen.

  “Probably for the best,” he said.

  Savannah knew he was right. She wasn’t even looking for a relationship. In fact, she was running from one. So why did her heart feel like he’d squeezed it until it was ready to burst?

  “Okay.” She didn’t recognize her frail voice. “I’m going down to the water to wash up.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “You can’t go alone.”

  He had a right to be upset over her breaking the rules, but she’d be damned if she wasn’t going to wash up, and now she didn’t want to be around anyone. And with what was going on between them—or not going on—she knew he would let her go.

  “It’s daylight. I’ll be fine. Besides, I didn’t go when the others invited me, so I can’t ask t
hem to go again.” Savannah gathered her towels and her toiletry bag and went down to the water, passing the others along the way.

  “It’s beautiful down there,” Elizabeth said as she passed. “Want me to come?”

  “No thanks. I’m good.” And too confused to want company. “I won’t be gone long.”

  “Josie got water for coffee. I’ll save you some,” Elizabeth offered.

  “Perfect, thanks.”

  AFTER MAKING COFFEE and rolled oats for the group for breakfast, Jack checked his watch for the fourth time. Savannah hadn’t been gone even twenty minutes, but it felt like an hour. He knew the dangers of someone getting separated from the group, and he’d never before ignored his own rules. Now he was breaking every one of them. If he hadn’t kissed her—and if she hadn’t kissed him back with more passion than he’d ever felt—he wouldn’t have let her go to the stream alone. If she hadn’t made his body thrum with desire, he would be down at the water’s edge so she wasn’t alone. Goddamn it. The whole situation was fucked up.

  “I’ll be back in a few minutes. No one leaves the site,” Jack said to the others. “Today we’re doing field instruction, so rest up while you can. You’re gonna need it.” He headed toward the stream, reminding himself that Savannah was just another survival camp student. In a few days, he’d never see her again.

  The sun beamed through the trees, warming the last of the morning chill. As he neared the bottom of the hill, he heard Savannah’s voice and he stopped to listen. She was singing something he couldn’t make out, but he enjoyed the melody as it filtered through the air. He tried to make out the words, but all he could hold on to was the sweet tone of her voice—and he realized that Savannah was anything but just another student.

  He took a few steps closer, and the water came into view. Jack scanned the banks for Savannah, but didn’t see her. He followed the sound of her voice through the woods to his right. When she came into view, he stopped cold. The sun glistened off of the water and illuminated Savannah’s naked body. Her perfect naked body. Her full breasts swayed with each scrub of her hands through her hair. Jack felt a tightening in his groin as he drank in her incredibly sexy curves and the narrow sweep of her hips. She sank into the water up to her shoulders and arched her neck, rinsing the lather from her hair. Jack’s hands instinctively flexed, the memory of the soft hairs on the back of her neck still alive on his palm. She disappeared under the water and then broke through the surface again, shaking the excess water from her tresses. Jack’s mouth went dry. It was like watching an X-rated movie, only Savannah wasn’t acting. She turned back toward the shore and scanned the edge of the water before walking too damn slowly to the water’s edge and leisurely picking up her towel and wrapping it around her body. Holy shit, she is sexy. Jack could barely breathe—again—and he definitely couldn’t think, which is why, when she dried herself off and lifted one foot to step into her panties, he lost his footing and slid down the hill on his ass, bumping right into a large, prickly bush.

  Savannah shot a look in his direction. She pulled up her panties and her hands flew across her breasts. “Jack? What…are you spying on me?” She scowled and spun around, frantically picking up the rest of her clothes.

  Jack scrambled to his feet and rushed to her side. His mind was still in an intoxicated Savannah fog. “I wasn’t spying. I swear…”

  She spun around, clutching her clothes in front of her body. Her eyebrows were drawn together, and her beautiful lips were pinched tight. Goddamn it, how was he going to explain this, and why were his eyes still locked on the milky skin of the side of her breast as it poked out beneath her arm?

  “Then what were you doing?”

  Shit. “You’re not supposed to leave camp by yourself. Don’t you remember the bobcat?” He knew he should turn away, back up, move apart from where she was, but all he could do was stand there and argue with her.

  “You knew I was coming here and you didn’t stop me. Why would I know it was a problem?”

  “Goddamn it, Savannah.”

  “Turn around,” she spat.

  He forced himself to turn away, fisting his hands. Why did I have to look? It if had been Elizabeth or Josie, he would have covered his eyes and called out from the hill. But damn it, he was only human, and he hadn’t been with—or even wanted to be with—a woman in more than seven hundred days. How the hell was he supposed to react?

  “First you kiss me, then you say you regret kissing me, and then you spy on me?”

  The venom in her voice hurt more than the accusation.

  “Real class act, Jack Remington. Is that your MO? Lure women to your mountain, and then reel them in and play with their minds?”

  “Goddamn it, Savannah.” His chest filled with anger and he spun around. “Who told you to get naked—”

  She finished buttoning her jeans but made no move to hide her bare chest.

  “Jesus.” He turned back around. “Sorry. I thought you were dressed.”

  “Well, I’m not, and I’m not going to do what you tell me. I’m not your fucking toy. I’ll dress when I’m damn good and ready, and I’ll bathe when I want. And, Jack Remington”—he felt her hand on the back of his neck, and heat rushed through him—“I’ll kiss whomever I please, whenever I please.” Her hot breath on his ear only heightened his arousal and rooted his feet to the earth while Savannah stalked off toward the camp with all her possessions in her arms.

  One glance of the dimples at the base of her spine, just above her low-waisted jeans, made his entire body shudder.

  Chapter Six

  “WHAT’S GOING ON with you and Jack?” Elizabeth asked Savannah.

  Savannah nearly choked. “What do you mean?” They’d been hiking for two hours, and every time Jack stopped to identify a plant or an animal print, he made a point of not looking at Savannah, but when her back was turned, she could feel his eyes burning a path to her. She didn’t think anyone else had noticed. When she’d heard him slip down the hill at the stream, at first she’d thought it was another bobcat. A second later, when she saw him sliding on his ass, a momentary flash of relief swept through her, but it hadn’t lasted long. She quickly realized that he must have been watching her bathe. The angrier she got, the more flustered he’d become, and when Jack was flustered, his eyes filled with uncertainty—quite a difference from the piercing stares he usually doled out—and his sharp edges softened with that uncertainty. As quickly as Savannah had become angry, it had turned to amusement and flattery.

  “I don’t know. He left the camp in the direction of the stream this morning, and ten minutes later you came stomping back even though you didn’t seem mad, and now he won’t even look at you. I might be married, but I’ve still got that female Spidey sense.” Elizabeth arched a brow.

  “He did come down to the stream when I was washing up, and I was embarrassed, but nothing happened between us. I don’t know why he doesn’t look at me. He’s a weird guy,” she said.

  Elizabeth flashed a wide, bright smile that reached her brown eyes. “I think thou doth protest too much,” she teased.

  Savannah laughed.

  They’d stopped again beneath a cluster of pine trees. Jack put one finger to his lips and put his other hand out in front of the group to stop them from walking any farther. Then he picked up a long stick.

  “Josie, you might want to hang on to Pratt. We’ve found ourselves a little snake.” He shot a look at Josie, who huddled against Pratt’s side.

  “A snake? I wanna see a snake,” Aiden said.

  Jack held up his finger again and shushed him. “We don’t want to spook him, buddy. Do you remember why?”

  “Because we’re the visitors. This is his home,” Aiden said.

  “That’s right,” Jack said, just above a whisper. “I’m gonna lift this leaf, and you’ll see the snake. I spotted his tail as we approached, but, Josie, you cannot scream. Got it?”

  Josie nodded. “Got it,” she said.

  Pratt held her close.
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  Jack was so kind to Aiden and so harsh to the adults that Savannah wondered if he had children. She knew almost nothing about him, other than he was an incredible kisser, he’d lost his wife a couple of years earlier, he had been in the military, and he appeared to be just as confused about women as she was about men.

  He lifted the leaf, and Pratt laughed.

  “That’s a garter snake,” he said. “Shit, you can find those back home.”

  Jack stood back up to his full height, towering over Pratt. “Yeah, you’re right, you can. Would you rather have seen a rattler? Something venomous? Because guess what, crackpot. You have no idea what’s slithering into your tent right now, do you?” Jack shifted his gaze back to Aiden. “What’s the rule for when you’re in the wild?”

  “Um…I know this.” Aiden bit his lower lip and looked up at Elizabeth with wide eyes. “Oh, don’t leave anything behind?”

  “Right. Always leave things the way they were.” He put the leaf back where it had been. “So we replace the leaf, and I’ll even replace the stick.” Jack put the stick back where he’d found it. “Pratt, take a look behind you, just to the right of the trail. What kind of print is that?”

  Pratt didn’t move. His lanky arms hung loosely by his sides, his hair curled out from beneath his tuque, and he looked at Jack with a challenge in his eyes.

  “Go on. Take a look.” The seriousness returned to Jack’s voice. His shoulders rode high and tight just below his ears, as if he were ready to strike.

  Josie moved away from Pratt’s side, her eyes darting between the two men. She pulled at a lock of her hair, running the ends between her fingers and thumb. Pratt took a few steps up the trail, and Jack grabbed his arm.

  “Hold up.” He trained his eyes on Pratt and turned his back to the group, then spoke in a quieter voice. “I’m here to keep you safe, and I can’t do that if you fight me. Whatever’s eating you up, you gotta deal with it. Take that shit out of your head and think about it, talk about it, then get rid of it. Trust me on this. Don’t shove it so far down that it’s impossible to single out. Deal with it.”