Lois Lavrisa - Chubby Chicks 02 - Murderous Muffins

by Lois Lavrisa

  I still wasn’t sure I could pull this off. Annie Mae had often shared tidbits of acting techniques with us. I sashayed toward Xavier, doing my best sexy silver screen siren imitation, like Mae West or Jean Harlow. “Why, I’m so glad that you finally made it back here.”

  He glanced around. “What are you doing in my room?”

  Thankfully I had everything back in order. He shouldn’t notice anything out of place. I flipped my hair and lowered my eyes. “You sweet, silly man, I’m trying to seduce you.” I was going to fry in hell for all my deceptions.

  Xavier narrowed his eyes. “Oh?”

  Batting my eyes, I said, “Why, yes. That’s what I’m doing.” Hoping that it sounded like a confident statement rather than a query.

  Xavier guffawed as he jutted his jaw. “This is certainly shocking, considering you’ve only given me, at best, a cold shoulder.”

  My legs wobbled as I moved closer to him. “That was only to conceal my real feelings.”

  “Is that so?” Xavier’s face softened.

  “Yes. I’m so captivated with you. I had to hide it for fear of letting myself be found out. After all, we have a professional relationship, landlady and tenant. But your charisma was just too much. It got the best of me.” My voice trembled. I had to say something clever. Remembering a line from the movie All About Eve, channeling Bette Davis, I said in a low voice, with my eyelids half slit, “Fasten your seat belts, it’s going to be a bumpy night.”

  “What?”

  I glided my finger along his arm.

  “Don’t get me wrong; I’m flattered, really I am. But I’m still not sure if I believe you.” Xavier rubbed his chin. “It sounds like you’re reading a script.”

  Shoot. I was a feeble excuse for an actress. What could I do now? I needed to distract him. And quick. I grabbed his shoulders, pulled him close, and planted a big kiss on his full, soft lips.

  Xavier initially hesitated, then hugged me tightly. “Now that was real.”

  I pressed myself away from him. “Yes, of course it was.” I surprised myself that I’d enjoyed what turned out to be a passionate kiss.

  A thud came from the closet.

  “What was that?” Xavier asked.

  I swore that if my skin could crawl right off of me, it would’ve right then. I felt as though I were having ministrokes as my head throbbed. “Cat?”

  “You have a pet?” he asked.

  I lifted my eyebrows and hands.

  Xavier frowned as he took a few long strides to the closet and yanked the door open.

  Cat sat in a ball with her head tucked under her folded arms.

  “Cat?” Xavier said.

  “Meow?” Cat rose.

  “And what are you doing in here? Are you a thief?” Xavier asked Cat.

  “No.” Cat smoothed down her shirt. “I lost something in there.”

  “In my closet?” Xavier folded his arms over his chest and tapped his foot.

  “Did I take a wrong turn? I thought I was in my room.” Cat fidgeted with her hair.

  She sounded so convincing. Now there was a good actress.

  “So what did you lose?” Xavier asked.

  Cat seemed to study her Birkenstocks. “My, um, it was my…”

  Oops, she was blowing it. I blurted, “Her pet gerbil. It ran out of her room and then under your door.”

  We all turned to the door. The bottom was flush with the floor. Not even an ant could fit under it.

  “Let’s try this again. Why are you trespassing in my room?” Xavier asked Cat.

  Cat’s face contorted as she looked at me, then back at Xavier. “Why, I’m, uh, I’m…here to seduce you, too.”

  A corner of Xavier’s mouth curled up. He stomped over to the bed and plopped down. He patted on either side of where he sat. “Okay, let’s do this.”

  “What?” I gulped.

  “The three of us—let’s do this.” Xavier narrowed his eyes at Cat and me. A slight smirk on his face. “Right here. Right now. In this bed.”

  “Oh my…do you…mean…with all of us?” I stammered.

  “He is foreign!” Cat grabbed my arm, pulling me close to her. “He wants a ménage à trois.”

  “Oh no, I don’t do that.” Shocked, I held my palms up. “No!”

  Xavier threw up his hands. “Fala sério.”

  “What?” Cat asked.

  “You’re joking me. And I called your bluff—that’s what.” Xavier huffed as he stood. “Obviously, you’re both lying.”

  I glared at Xavier as I wagged my finger at him. “Us, lying? I beg your pardon. Who is Xavier? Because it’s not you.”

  “Yes, who are you?” Cat asked.

  In a protective move, I positioned myself in front of Cat. “And now that we’re here, I bet you’re going to kill us just like you killed Mr. Phong. Kill me, but please let Cat go. She has four children and a husband to live for. I have nothing.”

  Xavier held his hands in a time-out letter T shape. “You think I’m a killer? Is that why you’re snooping around my room?”

  Cat and I both nodded.

  Heat rose from my chest to my neck.

  “Is this that American fooling holiday? Pra caramba!” Xavier said.

  “Hey, who are you with that accent and all?” Cat sneered.

  Xavier let out a deep breath and then sat on the bed. He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m not a killer. But I have been dishonest. It’s time for all of us to come clean.”

  “You mean you. As for us, we’re squeaky clean,” I said.

  “That’s why you broke into my room, right?” Xavier said.

  He had a point: the situation did not look innocent. I said, “At least my name is real.”

  “So is mine, a nickname actually, but still authentic,” Cat added.

  I made my way to the door and took hold of the doorknob. “We’ll let the police sort out the rest. Good-bye…whoever you are.”

  Cat followed me as I opened the door.

  “I’m Luiz Raimundo Souza,” Xavier said.

  “Luiz?” I let go of the door handle and turned around.

  “Wait, did you just say Souza?” Cat asked.

  He nodded.

  “Bezu, that sounds like the company that’s been investing in town. The one owned by some mega—rich Brazilian family,” Cat said to me.

  Luiz raised his hand. “That’s us. If you’d please allow me to explain. This will all make sense.”

  “Why in the world are you staying here—no offense, Bezu—when you could buy the entire city?” Cat sat in a chair next to the bed.

  I took a seat in an empty chair. “I’m completely muddled.”

  “And what about the pictures in your drawer? And you rummaging though Mr. Phong’s stuff the night he died? And what were you doing at the pawnshop?” Cat asked.

  “You sound like my mother when I was a teen and went out all night with the boys.” Luiz smirked.

  “Can’t help myself.” Cat shrugged. “And I guess you’re off the hook as a murder suspect, since we couldn’t find your motive anyway.”

  “We?” Luiz asked.

  “Bezu and me,” Cat said.

  “I’m glad that’s settled,” Luiz said.

  “Xavier, I mean Luiz, please go on with your story,” I said.

  Luiz stood, then stretched his arms over his head. He began to pace in front of Cat and me. “As you know, my family purchased the company on Bay Street. However, the second highest bidder, The Emro Company, was not happy they lost the deal. They were so antagonistic that they leaked false rumors that could ruin us. Each time, we disputed them. It seems that they won’t give up until we are disgraced and fail, so they can take over.”

  “Hostile non-takeover,” Cat said.

  “So what happened next?” I asked.

  “Since we took over, there have been indications that someone on the inside is stealing our company secrets and selling them to The Emro Company.” Luiz glanced off.

  “So charge them or
arrest them or something.” Cat pulled her hair back.

  “If it were that easy, I would not be here.” Luiz stopped in front of the nightstand. He filled the shot glass to the top, offering it to us. “Care for some?”

  “Don’t mind if I do.” Cat took a sip, then passed it over to me.

  I whispered to her, “Do we really believe that he’s innocent? Because you may’ve just taken a sip of poison.”

  Cat’s eyes went wide. “What do I do now?”

  “I love you. If you go down, so do I.” I took a gulp.

  Before Luiz took the glass, he touched my lip. “You had a drop.”

  “Oh?” I blushed.

  Our eyes locked.

  “It’s very smooth.” I just hoped it wasn’t lethal, too. My stomach somersaulted.

  “Ah, yes, twenty-four-year-old Evan Williams Bourbon.” Luiz held the glass. “Do either of you ladies want more?”

  Cat and I both shook our heads. My lips tingled. Was it a symptom of poisoning?

  Luiz tipped the glass back in his open mouth and then pursed his lips.

  I let out a breath. Lucky for us, it must not be toxic, since he drank it as well.

  He set the empty glass down. “To continue, we don’t know who the spy is. My security team had narrowed it down to Mr. Phong and Mr. Jayawickrama.”

  “Who’s Juka…Jaka-rumba?” Cat said.

  “Joseph,” I said to Cat.

  “Oh, Mr. Phong’s mad cousin,” Cat said.

  I said to Luiz, “Why not bring Joseph in for questioning?”

  Luiz’s dimples deepened as he smiled. “However, we have neither proof nor evidence.”

  “Good point,” Cat said.

  “I needed to be in Savannah to finalize a project. Since no one in Savannah knew me yet, I decided to be an undercover boss. My family and I thought if new eyes were on the matter of the missing items, perhaps I’d be able to sort it out.”

  “So you changed your name and accent and have a gun,” Cat said.

  “Yes. I chose an image, the tough-talking male, because that seems popular in your American movies. I’m afraid I’m not a great actor,” Luiz said to me.

  “I think you could’ve dialed down the macho several notches.” I smiled.

  Luiz gazed at me. “The kiss was magnificent. You’re a good actress, Bezu.”

  I opened my mouth to speak. I wanted to tell him that, although I had been performing, the kiss, even if done out of desperation, was, in the end, genuine and impassioned. Surprising even myself. I closed my mouth without emitting a sound.

  Luiz held up a hand. “You don’t have to say anything. I know now that you did all that just to distract me because I caught you in my room.”

  A shiver ran down my spine as I thought of the kiss. I felt a pang of remorse that we hadn’t met under normal circumstances. I liked the new Xavier-Luiz.

  “So, did you find anything that would incriminate either Mr. Phong or his cousin Joseph?” As I swallowed, the lingering taste of the liquor in my mouth made me wince.

  “Oh, I bet that’s why you were looking through Mr. Phong’s things that night, right?” Cat asked.

  “Perhaps I was a little too obvious.” Luiz continued. “Recently, some files went missing. Mr. Phong and his cousin both had access to the area during the time frame the material disappeared. We went through security camera footage, and both of them left with a satchel. All the other employees who were there during that time left empty-handed. It’s unfortunate we didn’t see the footage as it happened, then we could’ve stopped it. Currently, we don’t have the manpower to monitor all of the cameras throughout the day. We are looking to hire more staff.”

  “You are?” I asked.

  “Good pay and benefits. If you know of anyone, please let me know,” he said.

  “I will,” I said.

  “In the meantime, I have to find what was taken,” Luiz said.

  Cat said, “And once you get the files, you can arrest the person. Case closed.”

  “Our business is very vulnerable because someone leaked a few of our company secrets. We need to stop whoever is sabotaging us, and soon,” Luiz said. “Whoever is stealing the files must be getting paid a lot of money to be taking the risks that they are. I’m certain that The Emro Group is using a spy.”

  My hand went to my neck. I sighed, knowing the pearls were forever gone. “People get desperate and will do anything for money, even sell their souls.”

  Cat squeezed my hand, whispering in my ear, “You’re very brave, and you did what you felt you needed to do. Stop punishing yourself.”

  Luiz tilted his head. I couldn’t tell if he’d overheard what Cat said to me or not.

  I motioned for Luiz to continue.

  “After a little research, I knew that Mr. Phong lived here and that you had a room to rent. It seemed like a great way to keep on eye on him.” Luiz paused. “That is, until he died.”

  “Do you think that Joseph killed him?” Cat asked.

  “I really don’t know. But I couldn’t find the satchel in Mr. Phong’s room.” Luiz looked out the bedroom window.

  “So, Joseph must’ve killed Mr. Phong, then stolen the satchel or whatever was in it,” Cat said.

  “And his ring,” I added.

  Luis faced us. “I went to the pawnshop hoping to find other items stolen from my company. No luck.”

  “Did you see the ring?” Cat asked.

  “What ring?” Luiz asked.

  “Mr. Phong wore a gold ring with a ruby and diamonds, and it went missing the day he died. Now it’s at the pawnshop. Although we’re at a blind alley because we don’t know who brought it there,” I said.

  “I may be able to help out. Let me make a few calls.” Luiz cleared his throat. “We gave Joseph a few extra vacation days, just to get him away from the company for a while.”

  “You don’t want to keep the wolf with the sheep,” I said.

  Cat grinned at me.

  “Oh?” Luiz furrowed his brow.

  Seeing his face gave me an indication that he may have been confused at my expression. “Removing Joseph from your company was a good move. That way he can’t steal anything.”

  “Yes, now I understand. Is that a common expression?” Luiz asked me.

  “For some, yes,” I said.

  “She’s adorable, even if, at times, she’s difficult to understand.” Cat smiled.

  “I should have brushed up on my American clichés and expressions.” Luiz nodded. “Anyway, I’ve been trying to use all of my resources in an attempt to find proof that Joseph is indeed the spy. And I also thought that Joseph may’ve killed Mr. Phong. So I found out, even before the police got the official report, that the muffins were poisoned. Whoever made them, or had access to them after they were made, could have done this.”

  I remembered thinking that Mr. Phong had choked to death. I raised my hand. “I made them, but I assure you I did not poison them.”

  “She’s innocent.” Cat laid her hand on my back.

  “No, please excuse me, I was not accusing you in the least,” Luiz stammered. “Your muffins are delicious.”

  I attempted to smile as my eyes welled up. Mr. Phong had loved my baking, and now, because of that, he was dead. Poor, sweet, dear man.

  Luiz knelt in front of me and then held my hand. His touch was warm and firm. “I’m a sorry man that I made you sad. Bezu, forgive this fool for hurting you. That was not my intention.”

  I sniffed. It wasn’t what he had said, it was everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours.

  He went into his drawer, pulled out a handkerchief, and then offered it to me. “You are too kind and lovely a lady. You’re loyal to your friends. I’ve never met someone like you.” Luiz locked eyes with me. “I only hope that one day I can be as fortunate to have a friend like you.”

  Breathing in deeply, I composed myself. “Thank you, Luiz. You’re very sweet. And it’s not what you said that made me sad. Right now, a lot of th
ings are going on that have left me emotionally vulnerable.”

  The door flew open.

  “Freeze.” José held a gun at arm’s length in our direction. I jumped. Luiz held up his hands.

  Cat’s mouth hung open. “Oops.”

  Chapter Ten

  “Keep your hands up where I can see them.” José’s gun was aimed at Luiz.

  “Um, you can put that away.” Cat pointed at José’s gun. “It may not be funny now, but just give it time, and we’ll all laugh at this.”

  José grimaced as he put his gun in his holster. “Someone better tell me what’s going on—now.” José crossed his arms on his chest and slit his eyes.

  Luiz, Cat, and I explained everything to José. Cat and I apologized to José for troubling him. He instructed, well, demanded, that we let the police handle Mr. Phong’s case.

  After José left, Luiz said to us, “Ladies, if you could keep my identity and name a secret just a while longer, I’d forever be in debt to you.”

  As we all made our way downstairs, Cat muttered to me, “Like four college tuitions in debt to us?”

  I nudged Cat in her side as we stood in the foyer. “Luiz, you don’t owe us anything. It would behoove us all to keep this to ourselves until your company spy is unearthed and Mr. Phong’s killer is in police custody.”

  “And it could very well be the same person,” Cat said.

  “Ladies, we should keep in contact in case anything comes up,” Luiz said.

  We exchanged phone numbers.

  “Now if you would excuse me, I need to return to work. I’ll see you later on.” Luiz strode away.

  Cat said, “He has gazillions of dollars, and when someone that rich says he’s in debt to you, you have to wonder.”

  I giggled. “I have to admit, for a split second, I thought about an amount equal to what it would take to fix this place up.”

  “And you jabbed me in the side with your bony elbow when you were thinking the same thing.” Cat laughed. “So now let’s get back to sleuthing.”

  “Remember, José said leave it alone. Let the police handle it,” I said.

  “We’re so close; we just need to catch Joseph with the files,” Cat said. “You and I can do this. It will be easy. Trust me.”