Daughter of Ashes

by Esther Mitchell

  "Enjoy your conversation with Seoman?"

  Telyn sent a withering glare Nacaris' way as they rode along the main road between Brassanburg and Ulambara, the next day. She refused to dignify his sarcastic question with an answer. Like he didn't already know. She spoke with Carmyd this morning, and the old man sheepishly admitted he told Nacaris about her past with Seoman.

  "I'm just asking." He shrugged. "I assume you learned where we're going, next."

  She nodded at last. "Ulambara."

  Lysha, riding a short distance ahead of them, dropped back, her expression curious but concerned. "Why would Brun-Gild go to Ulambara? That's a holy city."

  "I think that's what he's counting on," Telyn answered her grimly. "In Ulambara, he can blend in with the pilgrims and Maji. No one would look twice at him, or his 'apprentice'."

  "Apprentice?" This came from Nacaris.

  "Sele. He'll have her disguised as an apprentice. It's unusual for a Master and Mistress to travel in company, especially when there's such a large difference in their disciplines. But a Master and an apprentice? No one pays any attention to that."

  Nacaris nodded, and his expression grew dark. "So, do we have a plan?"

  She shrugged. "I want to make a stop where Sele's troop was ambushed. It's along this road, and there might be some clues about why she was taken."

  "And what makes you so sure Brun-Gild took her?"

  She couldn't answer that, exactly, except that something Seoman told her about the situation bothered her. "It's a feeling I've got. Seoman said something that just sat wrong with me."

  Nacaris' gaze focused on her as he brought his mount closer to Bloodcloud. "What did he say?"

  "That two Maji in the same place create a large Majik signature. It was the way he said it, though, that bothered me most. I can't explain it, but I've got a feeling about this one."

  Lysha nodded. "I'll not question ye on that one."

  "I will." Nacaris didn't look convinced. "Telyn, how well do you really know Seoman, anymore?"

  She glared at him again. "I know you talked to Carmyd. I don't know exactly what he told you, but I know my friends well enough to know what they're capable of. Seoman wouldn't lie to me; not in prophecy."

  "You don't even have a clue what I'm capable of."

  Annoyance shot through Telyn, and pushed unwise words from her lips before she could stop them. "You're not my friend."

  He stiffened in his saddle, his features setting in stone-faced silence as he edged his mount away and rode ahead. Lysha loosed a low, disbelieving whistle.

  "Ye don' pull yer punches, d'ya?"

  Telyn's heart twisted, and a lump formed in her throat as she fought the sting behind her eyes, watching the set of Nacaris' shoulders. She hadn't meant to insult him. But the truth was still there, and it stung her at every turn. Truth was, he wasn't her friend -- not the way she thought of friends. Her feelings for him twisted around inside her, and she hadn't sorted them out enough to know what she truly felt, but she did know that he was hiding something big from her, and friends didn't conceal those kinds of secrets.

  "Where are we going?" She brushed off Lysha's question with one of her own.

  "'Tisn't too far, now. Accordin' ta what I was told, there's a clearin' in the trees a short ways ahead. That'd be the place."

  Telyn nodded, and let silence fall between them as her thoughts turned inward. She wasn't ready right now to discuss what she thought. Eventually, she'd have to mend fences with Nacaris -- she didn't want their relationship to sour because of her fears. She didn't even know where their relationship was going, yet.

  *****

  Rain poured down by the time they arrived at the clearing a few hours later, and they were all soaked through, even with the addition of riding cloaks. With a grimace, Telyn swung down from Bloodcloud's back, giving him a pat as she did. Crouching down beside his front leg, she touched her hand to the muddy ground, and frowned as sensations and impressions she didn't understand flew through her. The only thing she was sure of was that Majik was definitely at work here, and a lot of it.

  She looked up at Lysha as the other woman came to stand near her. "Is there somewhere around here where we can get out of this rain?"

  Nacaris approached, his tall form looking massive beneath the drape of his riding cloak.

  "There's a cave over there," he pointed beyond a stand of trees. "It's dry and free of inhabitants."

  Telyn nodded as she rose to her feet. "Let's go."

  Inside the cave, Telyn removed her ruined woolen cloak and tossed it to one side in a disgusted motion. Not that taking her frustration out on the cloak solved her problems, but it did make her feel more in charge of a situation already spiraling out of control. She liked that cloak. It was a mud-brown length of marmot wool -- not particularly costly, but her favorite riding cloak. That drab brown garment had offered her anonymity on many occasions when her only other cloak -- a scarlet length of brushed fleece her mother had given her -- would have made her presence painfully apparent.

  "What's riding you?"

  She turned from her contemplation of the cloak to find Nacaris at her side, his long hair and clothing dripping miniature puddles on the dirt floor of the cavern. She sighed heavily, and shook her head. She owed him an apology. No time like the present.

  "Nacaris, I--"

  "Shh." One long, capable finger pressed to her lips. "I figured out what you were trying to say. You're right -- you don't know me well enough to see me as a friend, no matter what else we share, and I can't give you the answers you're looking for."

  She turned toward him, her body instinctively seeking his warmth. "Why not? Are you running from someone?"

  He chuckled, and then sighed. "No, not exactly."

  She frowned. "What is it, then, exactly?"

  "I can't tell you."

  The grim set of his mouth and features told her how determined he was to keep his secret. With a sigh, Telyn leaned into him, slid her arms around his waist, and pressed her face to his damp chest. "We're all right?"

  His arms came around her, squeezing her against him as he dropped a kiss on her head. "Always."

  Relief sighed through her. Perhaps her luck wasn't as foul as she believed. Untangling herself from Nacaris' embrace, she smiled up at him for a moment, and then moved to help Lysha light the campfire. Settling herself beside the fire, she surveyed the area outside the cave, picking out shapes and sounds through the veil of rain that now pounded down.

  "Restless?" Nacaris murmured as he settled beside her, wrapping a warm, dry cloak that smelled faintly of his unique, windblown scent around her.

  She blinked at him. "That obvious?"

  A thin, strained smile tugged at his lips. "Not exactly."

  And, just like that, the uneasy feeling she felt from time-to-time around Nacaris was back, and she wondered what it was he felt so sure he couldn't tell her. But she couldn't do anything about that.

  Staring out into the darkness, Telyn could admit she was restless. She wanted to search the area before the rain washed away any clues, but she couldn't justify the search. Searching in this rain could result in dangerous illness.

  She clenched and unclenched her hand as she recalled what had prompted her to dismount and touch the ground, earlier. A single footprint -- the print of a small woman's slipper -- imbedded in the damp earth. There was Majik in that footprint, and she wanted to follow the rest of the tracks before they disappeared. They were near the Bria River, and she had an uneasy feeling that was exactly where the tracks would lead.

  "What are you thinking?"

  She turned her attention to Nacaris for a moment, and shrugged. "Not sure. I saw a print out there. I think there was a trail."

  He frowned. "I know. I saw the prints. They head for the river."

  Her stomach churned at those words. "This was a set-up."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Because of the footprints leading to the river, anyone who didn't know better migh
t assume that Sele, in a fit of morbid longing to be free of her studies, flung herself into the rapids of the Bria."

  "So how'd her kidnapper abduct her? The river?"

  Telyn shook her head. "The Bria's too shallow and treacherous for anyone except an expert boater to navigate."

  "That's half the world's population."

  "I know." She stared morosely into the fire. "This search is going nowhere, fast."

  I told you it would. The voice, spoken in her head, jerked Telyn's head up, to find Sala hovering just inside the campfire's flame. You cannot find she who does not wish to be found.

  Telyn shook her head. "What person in their right mind would choose captivity over freedom?"

  You assume she still possesses her right mind, Sala answered silently, even as Nacaris spoke near her ear.

  "You'd be surprised."

  She turned her gaze toward Nacaris curiously. "What?"

  "Think about it. If you were Sele, which would be more like captivity -- the life she lived locked in the Cloister, or the life her kidnapper offered her? Maybe she went willingly."

  That stopped the former Gildgard for a moment, and she recalled her own unwilling consignment to the ranks of the blood-bound. Grudgingly, she admitted Nacaris had a point. Locking someone away as a child, and then ordering every facet of his or her life, could definitely be considered a type of prison. And if Sele never wanted that life in the first place...

  She sighed. "You've got a point."

  He chuckled quietly. "Glad we can agree on one thing, anyway."

  "Why are you doing this, Nacaris? When we left Raiador, you were determined to bring Brun-Gild to justice. Why do you care about completing this search for Sele?"

  His gaze fixed on the fire, and he didn't answer for a long moment. And then, in a quiet rumble, he answered, "You said you think Brun-Gild took Sele..."

  "But you signed on before I brought that up."

  Nacaris continued to stare at the fire as words tumbled from his mouth that surprised Telyn.

  "When I was barely more than a child, I lost someone I loved a great deal. A girl who was captivating and courageous, and so vulnerable at the same time. She disappeared from our camp in the dead of night, and many believed raiders kidnapped her. They were sure she was dead, but I wasn't about to give up. I started tracking her, that day, and I've never given up."

  Her eyes stinging, Telyn turned her gaze away. The story he just told could have been hers -- it was very similar. Only, no one ever came looking for her -- eventually, she just gave up, and forgot. "You think she's Sele?"

  He blinked, and stared at her in shock, before he shook his head. "No. But I know what it can do to someone to lose everything they love. I can't take the chance that Sele might have actually wanted her life in the Cloister. If she did, then she's probably in her own private misery, right now. I can't ignore that."

  "You don't believe it's futile?"

  He shook his head. "I don't know, yet. We'll see."

  I know. Sala's impatient voice broke through the conversation, settling with certainty into Telyn's mind. I am trying to save your life, young Phoenix. None of you have any idea where your current search can lead, or the heartbreak you might endure because of it. There are more things in this world than can be seen by eyes alone, Telyn.

  Telyn nodded slowly, and cast a glance at Nacaris. "Do you think there might be spirits at work, here? Raktou? Sheehai?"

  Nacaris frowned at her. "You're talking about monsters. I don't think our monster is anything more than a man."

  "Sele's got a lot of Majik behind her. Why hasn't she escaped?"

  He sighed. "I don't have that answer, but I do think we need to be careful. Whoever this kidnapper is, he's dangerous. But I don't think he's supernatural."

  Telyn frowned. He sounded as if... "You don't believe in monsters, do you?"

  He looked uneasy. "It's not that simple. Too often, I've seen the actions people want to keep hidden painted as unseen terrors. We give evil faces to those things we're afraid to face -- our fears, shortcomings, and regrets. It becomes easier to blame some evil spirit or monster than to face the monster we've created inside ourselves."

  It was her turn to shift uneasily as his words found an unintended mark. She tried not to take his words personally -- she knew he was speaking from his own experience, not hers.

  "What face do your demons cover?"

  He looked surprised by the question, and was silent for a long moment before he shook his head. Sadness unlike any she'd ever seen engulfed his face.

  "There're so many to choose from. But the earliest stung the worst, I think. It drove me away from my home long before I wanted to or was old enough to leave."

  Empathy pricked her heart. She knew how it felt to be an outcast, unwanted and alone. "What happened?"

  The hollow regret in his voice tugged at Telyn. "There was a boy, several summers younger than I, but already an old man in so many ways. He was like a brother to me, and I was so proud of his brilliance, and his inventiveness. He made all his inventions with his own hands, from things he dreamed up in his mind."

  His smile turned wistful, almost nostalgic. "Paduari was obsessed with flying. He believed there was a way to let humans soar with the Avarii."

  Telyn frowned. She'd heard that name before, though she wasn't sure where. It was certainly not a Tagra name. "Avarii?"

  "Great, majestic creatures with bodies like cats and wings like birds. Avarii have a wisdom said to be handed down by the Great Gods Themselves."

  "And did your friend ever achieve his dream?"

  Nacaris jerked away. "I doubt it. I left after... when I was still a young lad. There was no place left for me there. I was a painful reminder of what went wrong."

  Her heart ached for him, to see the pain in his expression when he talked about his home and friends. "Surely they can't still blame you..."

  His laugh was hoarse, and bitter. "Don't talk about what you don't understand, Telyn. Platitudes don't suit you."

  Those words roused her anger. "Fine. I'll tell you what I do know. I know that no past is worth sacrificing those you care about. When you walk away, you can only go so far before the truth drags you right back into the fray. In the meantime, the questions eat you up, inside."

  She stared him down, more determined than she'd been in a long time. This was important.

  "Someday," she said softly as she laid one hand against his cheek, "you have to go home. Promise me that day will be on your terms, when it comes, and not at Kishfa's whim."

  His mouth sealed in a thin line, Nacaris nodded shortly and turned on his heel. She let him go, aware he had a lot to think through. She only hoped her own terrible lesson could help him. If it did, then her suffering was finally not in vain.

  Chapter Twelve

  Caution prickled along Telyn's skin, and she drew her mount to a stop, raising one hand to signal her companions likewise as they came within a short distance of Criva. This was a powerful trading port along the Bria River. She should hear the sounds of commerce even from here, and they should see merchant wagons and travelers along the road. At very least, she should be able to spot a sail or two on the river that wound through the fields alongside them. There was nothing.

  Nacaris' horse drew alongside hers, and she sensed the tension in him. She wasn't alone in her feeling that something was dreadfully wrong.

  "What do you suppose has happened?"

  She shook her head. "I have no idea."

  Behind them, Lysha swore beneath her breath in the Borderlander tongue. "There's somethin' amiss, is fer sure. D'ye think 'tis safe ta look inta it?"

  Telyn frowned, fighting the truth even as she spoke the words. "We don't have a choice. If there's an epidemic on the rise, we'll need to spread the word."

  With that, she nudged Bloodcloud forward, aware that she could be riding into the midst of her doom. The prickle of electricity along her skin told her this stillness wasn't the work of disease or natural dis
aster. There was Majik in the air.

  Telyn drew up short in shock just inside the gates as quiet oaths rolled from her companions. They stared, aghast, at the townsfolk, who stumbled around like drunkards, babbling like lackwits.

  "They look as Mistress Sele's escort was described ta me." Lysha shuddered as she delivered this news, and new dread plunged through Telyn.

  "I was afraid of that." She went to swing down from her horse, but Nacaris' hand on her arm stopped her. She glanced at him curiously.

  "I don't think it's safe to do that."

  She shrugged. "We're not going to learn anything otherwise."

  He didn't protest again as she swung down and, still holding the nervous horse's reins, approached a young man dressed in the city's colors -- a member of the local Garda.

  "What's happened here?"

  He blinked blankly at her, and then bowed low. Telyn glanced around in confusion, only to realize the young man wasn't bowing to her. His gaze fixed on Bloodcloud, instead. The man was bowing to a horse?

  "Noble One, there's no commerce here. Someone's stolen all the grain, and the river's dried up. Can you summon the grass to grow?"

  Telyn glanced back at Nacaris and Lysha. "What is he talking about?"

  "I doubt it makes sense to anyone but him, Telyn," Nacaris said, then sighed. "I don't think we're going to learn anything from these people."

  Telyn glanced around, and frowned. "Actually, I think we've learned quite a bit."

  "How so?" Lysha wanted to know.

  "We now know that whoever kidnapped Sele most likely came through this way."

  "But why -- and more importantly, how -- did he incapacitate an entire city?" Nacaris shook his head. "It doesn't make any sense."

  Telyn frowned. "I don't know yet, but there has to be an explanation for it."

  "And where'd they go from here?"

  And suddenly, Seoman's prediction made perfect sense. They had to be on the right path. "Ulambara."

  Nacaris' eyes widened. "Pardon?"

  "They're in Ulambara. I'm more certain of it now than ever before. Seoman told me the truth."