Love Me Like You Do: Books That Keep You In Bed

by Fields, MJ

  So, I make my decision and lift my dress above my head.

  Three

  Brie — Present

  My first two weeks as a California girl have been a whirlwind. Dawn and Kelsey have taken me shopping, helped personalize my room, introduced me around to their large, extended friend group, dragged me out for cocktails and dancing, and taken me to eat amazing food all over the city, and we have spent several lazy days on the beach. Needless to say, they took their responsibility of introducing me to my new home very seriously. It’s been exhausting and wonderful.

  I didn’t have a lot of close friends back home. Only one really. My very best friend and partner in crime, Adriana. She is one of my dad’s business partner’s daughters I met when we were ten years old, and we were inseparable. She helped me get into and out of a lot of trouble through the years. Until now, that is. There is no way out of my latest trouble.

  Even though she is one of the people I’m most angry with, leaving her behind is one of the hardest parts of leaving for good. I miss her every day. No more so than now as I stare at the doors of California State University.

  Today is the day that I start working toward my future goals. I have always dreamed of having my own restaurant. When I was a little girl, I would be under my mamma’s and my nonna’s feet as they cooked these delicious meals for our large, loud famiglia. I’m the baby of five. I have four older brothers, and my father’s parents moved to America from Italy decades ago to live with us. So, dinnertime was always an event in our home. When I was younger, I was completely enthralled with the whole process—from growing the vegetables and spices in the garden to making pasta by hand, creating homemade marinades and sauces and baking cakes and cookies from scratch.

  So, I find myself here, taking boring business classes because knowing how to cook is the easy and fun part of having your own restaurant. Time for me to settle in and do the work to learn the hard parts of owning your own business.

  Somehow, I managed to complete enough classes the year before last and earned a few hard-fought online credits over the last ten months to enter the current year as a junior. I will buckle down and get this degree. No distractions. I can’t allow myself to get off track ever again.

  The first day is a success. Turns out, Dawn is in two of my classes, and Kelsey and I have the same lab hours. It is great to have familiar faces in class. All of my professors seem amicable. I took a full course load, trying to play a little catch-up. It will be a tough but hopefully productive year.

  Now, onto the job search. I secured a position as a nanny for a four-month-old baby boy before I arrived. I have communicated with his parents and made all the arrangements via phone and FaceTime. Although I look forward to every moment with that little guy, that job will not pay the bills. So, I have a meeting at the local country club this evening. They are in need of a tennis instructor, and being as I taught youth tennis at our club back in New York, I was able to get Una to have my old boss call in a recommendation for me under my new name as a favor to her.

  I really hope I get this job. I’m in desperate need of it. Everything else is falling into place so well. Landing this would be the icing on the cake.

  “Hello, Ms. …” Mr. Cloniger, the head of HR for the club, extends his hand as I enter his office.

  “Miss Masters. Brie Masters, but please call me Brie,” I fill in for him as I take his hand.

  He is a plump older gentleman with a graying comb-over and kind eyes.

  “Yes, Brie, it is nice to meet you. Stan Morgan over at New York Golf and Country had a lot of great things to say about you.”

  We sit across from each other at his massive desk, and I wipe the sweat from my palms onto my slacks. I don’t know why I am so nervous. I think because a lot is riding on this job. I only have enough money to last through the next two semesters. I’m not comfortable with living so close to the edge. When I was growing up, money was not something I worried about. My father did quite well in his business, and he lavished our family with all the comforts one could want or need. Choosing to move out here on my own without any help from Papa was something I had to do, as scary as it was. I do not want his money or his business tainting my new life.

  “I see you worked predominantly with youth, ages eight to twelve years old. Our need here will entail much of the same but a little broader age range from about six to sixteen years old. We have need of instructors for classes of four or more and then for a few one-on-one private instructions for adult beginners and youth. The classes pay a salary, as we discussed over the phone, and the private lessons are commission-based. We only offer insurance benefits for full-time employees, but we do have an opt-in 401(k) available for both full- and part-time. I understand you are in school as well.”

  This is where I am a little unsure. Are my schedule limitations going to be a problem?

  “Yes, sir. I’m in classes three days a week. On those days, I can take on any evening classes or private lessons you have. The other two days, I’m available for either morning or evening sessions, and I’m flexible all weekends. I’m also working as a nanny for a couple in Santa Monica, but the mother is a stay-at-home mom, and she is very flexible. I can work a schedule out with her once I know what your needs are. If you choose to hire me, that is.”

  He places the paperwork he was perusing on his desk and looks up at me. “I am going to be frank. Your résumé is impressive. Stan highly recommends you, but are you sure you want to take on this job? You are young and new in town. You are in college. Working a job already. Don’t you want a little free time to hang out with friends and just enjoy life a little?”

  Do I ever, but that is not an option for me at this point. Dawn and Kelsey both have parents paying their rent and tuition, so they can concentrate on both school and partying. I don’t have that luxury. I am all I have.

  “Trust me, sir; I will still have plenty of time to participate in the joys of life. I just really need this income. I promise, if you give me the opportunity, I will work very hard for you and do the best job possible for your members.”

  He thoughtfully stares at me for a few moments, and then he smiles. “You remind me of myself. I, too, had to work my way through school and climb the ladder all by myself. I respect that. Okay, young lady, you start Monday. I will get all the paperwork filled out and emailed over to you this weekend. Welcome to the team.”

  I fight the urge to release the tears of relief I feel at the backs of my eyes as he stands and rounds the desk. He extends his hand, and I ignore it as I reach up and give him a tight hug.

  “Thank you, Mr. Cloniger. I promise, you will not regret this.”

  He pats me on the back and tells me to enjoy my weekend and to get ready for the madness. I leave his office, feeling lighter than I have in weeks … months actually.

  * * *

  When I arrive home, I open the door and walk into what can only be described as a Mexican luau. Mariachi music is blaring from Bluetooth speakers, and Dawn is dancing in the living room in a two-piece bathing suit and grass skirt with a colorful plastic lei around her neck and a huge sombrero on her head. Daniel is sitting on the couch with a bemused look on his face, and the aroma of tacos is wafting through the air. I think my roommates might be high. Do they get high? That’s one question I never thought to ask.

  “You’re home!” Dawn shouts over the music and flies toward me as I close the door and walk inside.

  “Yes, and you’re drunk,” I reply as I catch her in my arms.

  “I’m not drunk. I am pleasantly tipsy. Welcome to our celebratory Taco Tuesday! Well, I hope it’s celebratory. How did the interview go?” She expectantly looks at me as she teeters backward toward Daniel.

  “Good. It went really, really good. I start Monday.”

  She throws her hands in the air, giving the rock-’n’-roll horns as she shouts, “Celebratory Taco Tuesday it is, Kels. Woohoo.”

  Kelsey, who is dressed in the same attire, comes walking in from the k
itchen, carrying a pitcher of margaritas and a glass for me. “Awesome. We always do Taco Tuesday here, but this time, we added a little extra pizzazz just for you. Hence the leis and the pineapple-glazed pork tacos. After all, it is your introduction to the tradition.”

  Dawn produces a sombrero from beside the couch and ceremoniously perches it atop my head. “Now, go throw on a bikini and start drinking as fast as you can. We are about two pitchers ahead of you.”

  Daniel smirks at me and explains, “The girls love tacos and margaritas, and Tuesdays are kind of an undeclared holiday around here. You will get used to it.”

  “Used to it? She will love Tuesdays as much as we do. It is an unwritten hard-and-fast roommate rule,” Kelsey yells from the kitchen.

  I decide right then and there that I will in fact love Taco Tuesdays, so I down my first margarita as fast as I can to catch up with everyone. This is just what I needed. Normal, everyday twenty-two-year-old shenanigans. I think I have felt thirty-five since the day I turned sixteen years old. It has been exhausting.

  Stuffing the burden of my secrets down deep, I exhale and make the decision to try to be as exuberant as my new friends when it comes to life. I can do this. I just have to keep my head and my heart firmly in the present.

  Four

  Gabby — Past

  I just get my dress above my head when I hear it.

  “What the fuck is going on here?”

  I turn to see Cross stomping across the clearing with Angelica on his heels. Angelica is his current girlfriend and the bane of my existence. They are wearing matching angry scowls across their faces, but Cross’s is a little more lethal. In my inebriated state, I cannot wrap my head around the fact that my brother’s closest friend has caught me partially undressed and very, very drunk. As he barrels toward me, my fight-or-flight instinct kicks in, and I drop my dress beside me and look for a place of escape. I take off toward the water. The water is a good place to go.

  He catches up to me in a few long strides and grabs my waist before I have time to launch myself in the water and out of reach.

  “Oh no, you don’t, Tesoro.”

  I’m not sure exactly what comes over me in that instant, but I’m not happy he has ahold of me. He is here to ruin my fun. I start struggling in his arms, which only causes him to have to hold on to me in places he shouldn’t be holding.

  “Damn it, Gabby. Calm the fuck down.”

  I can hear Angelica interrogating my new friends, and then she turns to Cross and me and announces, “There are four empty vodka bottles over here. These kids are wasted.”

  I hate being called a kid. I especially hate it when she calls me a kid.

  “Who are you calling names, you two-bit whore?” Adriana apparently doesn’t appreciate it either.

  “Oh, insults from a drunk teenager really bother me,” she bites back.

  I watch in horror as three very naked boys emerge from the water.

  Dante speaks first with his hands held up in peace, “Hey, man. We are just having a little fun. Nothing illicit happening here. Yet.” He grins over at me as he adds that last bit.

  Does he have a death wish?

  He looks back up at Cross, and the grin falls away.

  “Just some good old-fashioned skinny-dipping.”

  Pure mortification washes over me. There is no way Cross is gonna let us slide and not rat me out.

  “Skinny-dipping with minors,” Cross spits out through gritted teeth. “Get your clothes on and get the hell out of here now before I call her brothers and let them deal with you.”

  I see the tinge of fear hit their eyes. They must know who my brothers are. One by one, they gather their belongings and start toward the trees.

  Dante turns back a moment later and says, “Hey, Gabby. I had a great evening, getting to know you. Can’t wait to see even more of you. Another time.”

  I hear and feel Cross’s growl of anger against my skin.

  “Angie, get Adriana home. Try to get her in the house without waking anyone.”

  Adi is not having it. “I don’t need an escort. I can find my own way home, thank you.”

  “The hell you will. Those boys could be waiting for you in the woods. Do you understand what kind of danger you two put yourselves in tonight?”

  Okay, I have moved from embarrassment to right the hell pissed off.

  “Let me go, Cross.” I start kicking and thrashing in his arms. “You don’t get to come out here and start running off and insulting my friends. They are the only ones who gave enough shit about me to try to make my birthday special. In fact, they are the only ones who even bothered to wish me a happy birthday.”

  He goes perfectly still.

  “Angie, take her home. Please make sure she gets inside safely before you leave. I’m sorry our night has been cut short, but I really need you to do that. I’ll call you in the morning. And, Adriana, if you give her any trouble at all, I will personally come over to wake up your father and inform him of what I found out here.”

  Adi huffs, but she gives in. No way does she want her papa finding out she stole his liquor and fed it to a bunch of underage teens.

  I mouth, I’m sorry, to her as she gathers her stuff.

  Angelica comes over and kisses Cross before following Adi through the trees, toward her house. We stand here in silence with him at my back and his arms locked around me.

  “It’s your birthday?” he whispers.

  “It’s after midnight, so technically, yesterday was my birthday.”

  I hear a soft, “Damn it,” uttered under his breath, and he releases some of the force with which he had my arms pinned against my sides. “So, your brothers forgot your sixteenth birthday?”

  I turn in his arms, and with a quivering bottom lip that, try as I might, I can’t get to stop betraying me, I reply, “Not just my brothers. Everybody. Mamma, Papa, my grandparents … you. Not a single person, except Adi, remembered at all. So, she arranged this last-minute makeshift party to celebrate.”

  He just stands there, looking at me with pity on his face.

  “Don’t look at me like that. I am fine. It’s just a stupid birthday. There will be another one next year. Maybe then I can swim with my friends in peace.”

  That wipes the pity right off his face. The pissed-off is back.

  “Did you even know those guys? They seemed older than you and way soberer than the two of you. Were you really gonna get naked for them? Do you know what that says to a horny guy? Do you? You could have been attacked by any of them or all of them. How could you have been so careless? I expect shit like this from Adriana but not from you.”

  That does it. All the fight just flies right out of me. I start sobbing. Cross wasn’t expecting the tide shift and picks me up into his arms.

  “I didn’t want to at first, but they all were doing it, and Adi seemed like she thought it was safe. All I wanted was to swim and maybe be kissed,” I confess as I bury my face into his shoulder.

  He was walking us out of the clearing when he stops dead. “You wanted one of those boys to kiss you? While you were drunk and naked in the water?”

  It sounds really bad when he repeats it back to me. My head is getting heavier and heavier, and I’m finding it hard to form words.

  “I think so. I have never been kissed, and I think I’d like it. Though I don’t think anyone wants to kiss me.”

  I hear his sharp intake of breath.

  “Now, why on earth would you think a thing like that?”

  I am starting to fade into the blackness that is pulling me under as I hear him repeat himself, “Why would you think that, Tesoro?”

  What were we talking about again? Oh, yeah, kissing.

  “Because nobody has ever tried to kiss me. I’m the only girl I know who hasn’t had her first kiss. It’s starting to get embarrassing.”

  He is walking again.

  “Please, don’t take me home,” I plead. “Papa and Mamma are fighting again, and I don’t want to be there.
Can you take me home with you tonight?”

  My eyelids are so heavy, and so is my head, too heavy for me to hold it up any longer. I feel him change directions.

  “I’ll call Nicco. He is at Marianna’s apartment. Maybe you can go there tonight.”

  I start softly crying again, and he stops once more.

  “I don’t want to go to Marianna’s. I want to go home with you.”

  “That’s not a good idea, Gabby.”

  “Why not? I miss you.”

  I do miss him. Since he decided to start avoiding me, I’ve felt like I’m grieving a loss.

  “Don’t you miss me?” I whisper into his neck.

  I don’t hear his reply as I slip back into the darkness.

  * * *

  The next thing I remember, I am standing in Cross’s bathroom in nothing but my bra and panties, and he has the shower running. I can smell the vomit in my hair. It makes my stomach turn, and the room starts to sway. Or is it me? Am I swaying?

  Cross is holding me upright as he reaches his hand under the spray to test the water.

  “Okay, in you go. We have to get you cleaned up.”

  I don’t even bother to argue. I just step forward. The warm water hits my face, and I start to sink to the tiled floor.

  “Oh no, you don’t.” Cross pulls me back up as he steps into the shower with me. He has on shorts and a T-shirt. “Turn around.”

  I do as I was told and turn toward the front of the spray. He is standing behind me, and I smell the shampoo in his hands as he takes my hair and starts to run his fingers through to build a lather. It feels so good. I lean back into him and sigh. He inches back, so we aren’t touching, except where his hands are touching my hair. I let him wash and rinse me, and then he runs conditioner through my long locks, working the tangles out. I’m very relaxed as he massages my scalp. I try to turn around and face him, but he brings his mouth close and commands me to stand still. His lips graze my ear, and I groan. He immediately reaches to turn off the water.