Love Me Like You Do: Books That Keep You In Bed

by Fields, MJ

  If anyone had earned the right to retire and enjoy life, it was Nana and Pops. They’d married young, suffered two miscarriages before having their first child, worked tirelessly to build two successful businesses, and lost their only child when she ran away from home at fifteen. Then, at the age of fifty, they became parents all over again when my mother reappeared just long enough to dump Sophia and me on them.

  Of course I wanted them to be happy. They were the ones who raised me, who had spent the last nineteen years helping me forget the life I had before they were in it. But so many of my happiest memories were from the cross-country adventures we had in our quest to stay at a Serenity Hotel in each of the thirty-three states that had one.

  For some reason, I’d never realized their retirement would mean selling that piece of my childhood.

  Now they were selling Serenity and leaving to see the world?

  “So you’re just going to sell it and what? Globetrot?” I asked. “Just like that? Couldn’t you just step down and find someone else to run it, but not sell?” I realized my questions sounded more like accusations, but I let them linger anyway.

  Pops shook his head. “Nothing is official yet, Elliebelly. We’ve got a few interested parties, but we’re only going to sell to the right buyer. Look, girls, we love you, but this is not up for discussion. We have spent our lives making Serenity what it is, and it’s past time we let ourselves enjoy the kind of life we’ve earned.” Pops paused, registering the matching frowns Sophia and I wore. “This is a good thing, girls. Promise.”

  “I’m happy for you guys,” I said quickly. “Really. It just feels like we’ll be losing a chunk of our childhood.” And you two, if you decide to spend your golden days traveling the globe.

  Pops squeezed my hand. “Those memories are always going to be yours to keep, Elliot. Selling Serenity doesn’t erase the wonderful times we had there. And I’m sure we could add a clause to the contract that we and you girls can stay at any one of the hotels free of charge during our lifetimes,” he added with a wink.

  That got a chuckle out of me, and I forced myself to let his words sink in.

  “What about the inn?” Sophia asked quietly. While my disbelief had somewhat worn off, Sophia’s frown was still there, and her dark brows were pulled down.

  Let Love Inn was what started it all for Nana and Pops. They had worked tirelessly to make it a successful B&B before Serenity Hotel was even a blip on their entrepreneurial radar. It was their business baby. Even though they’d closed the doors on Let Love Inn once Serenity required their full attention, I couldn’t imagine them letting go of the place completely.

  “The inn is completely separate,” Nana supplied quickly.

  The sighs of relief Sophia and I both heaved were short-lived.

  “The inn will be going to you both. It’s yours, if you want it,” Pops said casually, as if he were referring to giving us the last dinner roll instead of a business.

  “Wh-what?” I sputtered.

  “George! I thought we were going to wait to discuss the inn,” Nana scolded before turning to us and sighing. “Girls, you both know how much that place means to us. We don’t want to sell it to a stranger. In fact, we won’t sell it to a stranger. Our dream was always to see it re-opened one day.”

  Pops nodded and bit into a piece of bread. “We’ve discussed it at length, and it would be passed down to you girls eventually, anyway. This is simply our way of giving you the option to see that day sooner rather than later. Now, you don’t have to decide what to do with it right away, but we’re going to have a consultation for potential renovations. We’ve been setting aside money for years with the intention of updating the inn, so that money will cover whatever changes you girls would want to make.”

  Our jaws dropped in unison.

  Nana leaned across the table. “Please don’t feel like you’ve got to make a decision tomorrow or even in the next month. The inn isn’t going anywhere, and neither are we. Take some time to think about it, that’s all we ask.”

  We both nodded but made no attempt to speak.

  In no way, shape, or form were we qualified to own and operate an inn. Growing up around it, even spending countless hours in their office, hardly qualified as experience. Not to mention, I already had a job I really loved. And Sophia was still months away from graduating.

  “Uh,” I said eventually, still searching for the right words amidst all the questions swimming in my mind. “If—and that’s a huge if—we were to take over the inn, we couldn’t ask you guys to foot the renovation bill. It would be our responsibility. You’ve already set up the trust funds for us. We, or at least I, couldn’t accept this from you too. It’s too much, Nana.”

  I fidgeted with the napkin in my lap, fighting the familiar discomfort this topic always evoked in me. The trusts they’d set up for us were funded with the money they’d originally set aside for our mother. Most people would be elated to have zeros added to their bank accounts on their twenty-fifth birthday, but I was dreading it. Until coming to live with Nana and Pops, I’d never known what it was like to eat three well-balanced meals in one day, much less what it was like to live a life where money wasn’t a concern.

  “El, honey, we’d never give you the inn in its current shape and expect you to fix it up. Those trust funds are our way of ensuring you girls are taken care of. That money is for you, for your future. We’ve talked about this,” she finished, patting my hand and giving me the same gentle smile she’d given me every day since the day we met.

  I sighed, knowing this was a losing battle. Sophia offered me a sympathetic shrug that told me we were on the same page, but that she also knew arguing was futile.

  “I just have to know; did you two get tricked into smoking some grade-A pot in Bora Bora?” Sophia asked, eyeing our grandparents as if they’d turned into strangers before her eyes.

  I laughed at her comment, but it didn't seem that farfetched considering the abrupt changes in our grandparents.

  Retirement. Selling Serenity. Giving us Let Love Inn.

  All in one fell swoop.

  And to think, just a week ago the craziest thing about my life was the drama caused by the revolving door of Milo’s model friends traipsing in and out of our apartment.

  Nana laughed and tucked a chunk of her light blonde hair behind her ear. “Girls, we realize this is a lot for y’all to take in at once. Like I said, you don’t have to make a decision right away. There’s no rush. We just want you to know the option is available to you.”

  A lot to take in.

  Biggest understatement ever.

  Also, the freaking theme of my life these days.

  I ate dinner without paying much attention to any of the food going into my mouth. Or the words coming out of it. Somehow, Nana had managed to shift the conversation to safer topics, like Sophia’s classes and my upcoming weddings.

  It wasn’t until the bill was paid and Pops was ushering us out of the restaurant that he dropped the final bomb of the night.

  “Oh, there’s one more thing, girls,” he said, slinging an arm around Nana’s shoulders. “The consultation for the renovations is the day after tomorrow. It would be great if you both could make it.”

  “Whoa. You’ve already hired someone? Who?” Sophia asked.

  I knew who. I held my breath, waiting for my suspicion to be confirmed.

  When it was, I realized how wrong I’d been to assume my life couldn’t get any crazier.

  * * *

  On the drive back to my apartment, I decided to table the whole Nana and Pops retiring situation and focus my efforts on fixing things with Sophia. She had an equal say about the decision with the inn, and figuring out what to do with the place wasn’t going to happen until I was firmly back in her good graces.

  One thing at a time.

  After promising Milo that he had no reason to worry about leaving the two of us alone when he left for work, I pulled out a bottle of rosé and poured generous servings into two
stemless wine glasses.

  “Knock knock,” I called, tapping my foot against Sophia’s door. “Can we talk? About last weekend?”

  The door slowly opened, and Sophia’s annoyance eased up once she saw my peace offering. “Okay. But you should probably go get the bottle if we’re having this conversation.”

  I arched a brow, but wasn’t going to question her. A few seconds later, I reentered her bedroom with the bottle and took a seat on the opposite side of the bed from her.

  I waited until Sophia had downed half of her glass before summoning the nerve to broach the subject. “So…the only thing I remember about our conversation is that it was Helen-related.”

  When it came to our mother, we’d never found a way to have productive conversations. Mostly because I preferred to avoid the topic altogether. I was one day shy of turning five when Helen brought us to live with Nana and Pops—old enough that some memories of our life with her had stuck with me. Haunted me. Sometimes I selfishly wished Sophia shared my memories just so I’d have someone who understood. But most days I was grateful she was too young to remember seeing all the random men coming and going from our dingy, dilapidated apartment. When I, at the innocent age of four, had finally found the courage to ask Helen why she always went to the bedroom when they came over, she told me it was her ‘grownup time,’ and to go make Sophia stop crying so her ‘special friend’ didn’t get upset. “You remember what happens when Mommy’s friends get upset, don’t you?”

  “I’m sorry things got so heated,” Sophia said, breaking me out of the memory from hell. “It’s just…I’m tired of you treating me like a kid when it comes to Helen. I know you don’t like to talk about her, and I respect that. But you, of all people, should understand why I wanted to find her. Then the opportunity to do so practically landed in my lap when I found someone who looked like her named ‘Helen K Bates’ on Facebook. I told you that I sent her a friend request and wanted to maybe give her my number eventually if it really was her. You freaked out and told me that was a terrible idea, and not to expect you to protect me from her anymore. You also said that I was an idiot if I believed she wouldn’t stand me up too. That’s when I started yelling. But, El, what did you mean by that—stand me up too? And protecting me?”

  I tipped my wine glass back against my lips, purposefully taking my time while I debated how to handle my sister’s questions and everything else she’d just thrown at me. Like the fact that I now knew Helen’s last name.

  She was right, of course; I couldn’t blame her for being curious.

  But she didn’t know the entire truth about our mother.

  “Sophia, I’m sorry I called you an idiot. But I just think you’re setting yourself up for failure by going down this path. I don’t want you to get your hopes up only to have them crushed when history repeats itself. If she decides you’re not worth her time again.”

  She eyed me curiously over the rim of her glass before setting it down and hugging her knees to her chest. “Don’t you have questions? Aren’t you curious about what she’s like or what she’s been doing all these years?”

  “Sure, I have questions. But, honestly? It’s not worth my time. Or yours. As far as knowing what kind of person she is…she’s the kind of person who neglected then abandoned her children. That’s all I need to know.”

  “She’s also the kind of person who gave us up in order to give us a better life.”

  I shook my head. “No, Soph, she gave us up in order to give herself a better life.”

  “Can’t it be both? And doesn’t it count that she gave us to her parents instead of social services?”

  “I’m supposed to give her a pass for everything else just because she eventually did what she should’ve done right after you were born? That’s not how it works, Sophia. And that’s also my point—she gave us to Pops and Nana. The people who raised us and gave us everything. Wondering about her seems…”

  “Like you’re betraying them?” Sophia supplied.

  I nodded.

  “They wouldn’t fault us for having questions about her, El. Don’t you think they have questions too?”

  “I think Nana and Pops wrote her off a long time ago. She burned them. Twice.” I sighed, reaching out to put my hand on her leg to get her attention. “But I understand why you’re tempted to seek answers. So, I’m not going to try and talk you out of going through with this, but I can’t guarantee that I’ll ever be willing to meet with her.”

  She lifted her head enough to meet my eyes. “You’re okay with me seeing where things go if she accepts my friend request?”

  “I know you think I still treat you like a little kid. And I guess I probably do sometimes; I can’t help it. I’ll always look out for you, Soph. Comes with the big sister territory. But I know you’re perfectly capable of making your own decisions. And if you decide you need answers from our mother, I’m not going to stand in your way. Part of growing up is learning from and living with the choices we make…a lesson I’m still learning.”

  “You think I’m making a mistake?”

  I hesitated, debating my response. “I didn’t say mistake, I said choice. There’s a difference.”

  “Fair enough. El, thank you. For hearing me out and telling me you don’t think I’m an idiot. Even if part of you does.”

  I poured us both refills before turning back to her and clinking my glass against hers. “I don’t think you’re an idiot. And you’re welcome. I’m glad we did this.”

  She smiled, and I knew she understood my meaning.

  I didn’t have all the answers, but I meant what I'd said—I was genuinely relieved Sophia and I had found a way to have a productive conversation about Helen.

  I just hoped to God history wasn’t about to repeat itself.

  Five

  Bryce

  It felt strange driving through the Kincaid property after so many years away. In fact, because their property directly backed up to my parents’ land, I’d never actually driven up the driveway before; I’d always just cut through the Crush vineyard and walked along the fence line to get to the manor.

  Kincaid Manor was situated at the north end of their property, and Let Love Inn was located in the southwest corner. All together the Kincaids owned about twenty acres, which allowed them privacy without being too far from the inn.

  The sound of gravel crunching beneath my tires took me on a bittersweet stroll down memory lane as I turned onto the driveway leading toward the inn.

  Flashes of bike rides, blonde hair blowing in the wind, and the most contagious laugh I’d ever heard washed over me. I surrendered to the memories, letting images of a young Elliot permeate my mind until I came to a stop and those images of the Elliot I knew were replaced by the sight of present day, grown-up Elliot.

  The Elliot I no longer knew.

  Seeing her at the open house had caught me completely off guard.

  Actually, it wasn’t just seeing her that caught me off guard. It was being reminded how gorgeous she’d grown up to be that I wasn’t prepared for. Even globs of kimchi and sriracha couldn’t detract from El’s beauty, with her lithe little body and those big blue eyes, not to mention her breath-stealing smile.

  When we were kids, I used to tease her about her mouth being larger than average.

  If only I had known then that I’d grow up and fantasize about all the things that mouth could do.

  Elliot was nineteen the last time I’d seen her, and by then our three-year age gap wasn’t an issue, so I’d allowed myself to appreciate her girl-next-door good looks. Hell, I almost fucking kissed her. But at the time, I was in no position to even allow myself to think of her as anything but a friend.

  Now?

  In a completely different way, my life was still full of unknowns.

  But one thing I knew with absolute certainty was that I wanted the opportunity to make things right with her. Somehow. The look on her face when she found out I’d been here for a year had haunted me all week, and I hat
ed myself for not calling her any of the times I picked up my phone to do so over the last year.

  I parked and realized El was the only other person here when I saw her sitting on the stairs leading to the inn’s porch, twirling a thick blonde lock around her fingers. Even with a furrowed brow and scowl weighing her features down, she was beautiful.

  But I was lying to myself if I thought her looks were the only thing responsible for this foreign warmth filling me up. It was her—all of her. For once, someone other than Peyton brought the organ resting inside my chest to life, disrupting its steady autopilot rhythm. It had been over two years since a woman evoked any kind of emotion in me, and I wasn’t sure what to make of the feeling.

  “Did you know?” she asked, crossing her arms and narrowing her baby blues at me.

  Know what? Immediately, my thoughts turned to that night five years ago. To its aftermath.

  Elliot didn’t look angry, exactly, but she did look hurt. Again. Which made me feel like an asshole, but also told me she was probably referring to something else.

  I took a tentative step in her direction. “About the renovations?”

  “No. About Nana and Pops selling Serenity. Retiring. The whole shebang.”

  “George told me about it when he called about the inn a couple weeks ago, but I swear, El, I had no idea you didn’t know about Serenity. I’m sorry.”

  The harsh lines between Elliot’s brows softened, and her expression morphed into one of understanding. “I guess it’s good they waited until after their honeymoon to tell us. It just seems like it’s all happening so fast.” She paused and picked at a frayed part of her ripped jeans, drawing my attention to the smooth skin hiding beneath. “Did they tell you they want to give the inn to Sophia and me? As in, we’d be the owners and have final say over all of the renovations.”

  “They mentioned that they hadn’t decided exactly what to do with the place. I figured they meant whether they’d keep it or sell it, though.”