“What for?”
“I had no idea how powerful of an effect it would be to see you. I thought… I don’t know what I thought except that I’d see if you’d talk to me and be willing to listen to what I have to say.”
He pulls away, and my heart aches at the loss of him. Leaning against the wall, he crosses his arms over his chest. “Here’s your chance. Talk.” His words are clipped, and I understand he’s mad. I’m mad, too—at both the time we lost and Jeremy blackmailing me—but when I look into his brown eyes, everything fades away.
“I was wrong about the way I handled things. I should have told you what was going on, but Declan—”
“Yes, your brother. I’m sure he didn’t approve. Like I said before, I get my bonus in a couple of weeks, and I’ll give it all to him. After that, you can let me know how much I owe you.”
He’s cold and detached, which I don’t blame him for, even if he’s never been this way with me. From the beginning, he’s been open and carefree. I’ve done this to him, and it’s my job to fix it.
“No, he didn’t approve, but he’s not the only reason I ended things. If we had kept seeing each other, Jeremy would have ruined both our lives.”
“My life has felt pretty ruined since January. It’s good to know you didn’t feel the same,” he bites out.
“I have, and I do, but I had to put our futures first and foremost. I should have told you that if you waited until today, we could be together, but I didn’t want to hold you back.”
“Hold me back,” he laughs without humor. “How would you feel if the love of your life told you to take a hike?”
I gasp. He mentioned love back in January, but I thought it was just him being emotional at the time. I shouldn’t have, though, because I knew then that I loved him.
“I’d be heartbroken. I have been heartbroken. The last four months have been some of the hardest months of my life. I wish I could turn back time and change things, but I can’t. That’s not how life works, but if you think that someday you’ll be able to forgive me and want me back in your life, I’m here.”
His face softens just the tiniest bit, and I think I may have broken through, but then his face hardens. “What about your brother? Will I still be a secret?”
Will the hurt from hiding our relationship from my brother be the end of us?
“He knows why I’m here.”
“And does he approve?”
“You’ll have to prove yourself to me, but I’m not going to ask my sister to spend another day in misery just because I’m a miserable bastard,” Declan says from behind me. How long has he been there?
“And what about Jeremy?”
“After today, he can’t hurt you, and if he tries…” Declan cuts himself off. “Let’s just say you don’t need to worry.”
Coming to stand beside me, Declan gives Merrick a once-over and then nods to himself. “I’m going to leave and give you two time to talk. I’ll be home if you need me.” Leaning down, he kisses me on the cheek. “Good luck.”
I think I’m going to need it.
I watch as my brother walks down the hall and then out the door before I turn back to Merrick. He’s looking at me with an unreadable expression on his face.
“I really am sorry, Merrick. I thought I was doing the right thing at the time.” Tears fill my eyes as he continues to watch me with his stoically blank face.
He shifts against the wall, never taking his eyes off me. “You did the right thing, except you should have talked to me about it. The way you treated me made me feel like I was just some boy toy you used. All these months, I thought I meant nothing to you.”
His words are my undoing. I can’t hold back the tears that have been building with every word he speaks. “Nothing could be further from the truth. I only hope one day you’ll be able to forgive me.”
He takes a step toward me but stops. I’d give anything to be in his arms again. “And if I forgive you today?”
“Then I’ll love you for the rest of my life. I won’t let a single day go by where I don’t tell you how much I love you,” I cry.
His nostrils flare. “I never thought I’d hear you say you love me.”
“I do, Merrick. I did for quite some time before everything blew up,” I reach forward and take his hand. “I’m sorry I never told you. I let my insecurities get the better of me.”
He shakes his head. “When are you going to start believing what I tell you?”
“Today. I’ll start today. I promise.” If only you forgive me.
“Don’t cry, Roxie. I can’t stand the thought of being the one making you cry.” He opens his arms, and I don’t waste any time diving into his arms.
Hugging him tightly, I rise up on my toes and kiss him. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too.” Squeezing me, he pulls back to look down at me and chuckles. “I never thought today would end this way.”
“What do you say we get out of here?”
A smile breaks out on his face. “Where do you want to go?”
“I have a graduation present for you that involves us going away for a couple of days if you can get away.”
His eyes light up. “A weekend away?”
“I rented a cabin by Lake Arrowhead. All you have to do is pack a bag.” I chew on the inside of my cheek, waiting for his reaction.
“What about your brother?” He nods in the direction Declan left.
“He’s worked hard and is doing so much better. In fact, it was his idea for us to go away. Will you go away with me?”
“I’m sorry. I just—”
My heart falls to my stomach. It’s over. “It’s okay, I understand,” I interrupt him, not wanting to hear an excuse.
Laying a finger over my mouth, he shushes me. “Let me speak, woman. I’ll happily go away with you.”
“You will?” I mumble against his finger.
“If you think I’m going to waste another moment away from you, you’re out of your mind. If I wasn’t dressed up under here, I’d be happy to leave right now.”
“Really?” I happily cry out.
“Really. You have no idea how happy you’ve made me.” A buzzing sound has him stepping back and fishing his phone out of his pocket. “Shit, that’s Walker. He was who I was talking to before, and he’s wondering if everything’s okay. Can we go back out so that I can say goodbye to him? He has to get back to LA.”
“Of course, we can. I’d never deny you your friends.”
Merrick swoops down and kisses me, thrusting his tongue against mine and letting out a low moan. My fingers dance along the nape of his neck. I want to pull him closer, but he steps back before I have a chance.
Rubbing his thumb over my bottom lip, he smiles. “Don’t pout. Let me go say goodbye to Walker, and then I’m all yours.”
Hearing Merrick say he’s all mine makes me beyond happy. I can’t help the smile that stretches across my face.
Wrapping his arm around my shoulders, Merrick pulls me close as he holds open the door for us to exit. “Come on, beautiful, let me introduce you to my best friend.”
I snuggle into his side as we walk across the auditorium. The room isn’t as crowded as it was before my breakdown. Wrapping my arm around his waist, I search the crowd for the man Merrick was previously talking to. He’s not hard to find with his dark hair hanging down on his forehead, dark soulful eyes, and olive skin that I can tell is flawless from halfway across the room. He’s tall with black jeans encasing his long legs with a black v-neck t-shirt that fits him like a glove. He exudes confidence.
The moment he sees Merrick, he cracks a bright smile that transforms him from a broody rocker to a handsome young man.
“Sorry to drag you back, but I wanted to say goodbye since you were such a baby the last time I left without seeing you,” his friend pats him on the back.
“Fuck you, but thanks,” Merrick laughs. “I can’t help it if I’m a sentimental fool. One day you’ll be too busy to even take my c
alls.” His friend rolls his eyes and doesn’t say anything. “Before you go, I want to introduce you to my girlfriend, Roxie. Roxie, this is my best friend and the lead singer of Crimson Heat, Walker Pierce.”
I look up to see Merrick beaming.
“It’s nice to meet you,” Walker and I both say at the same time.
“It’s about fucking time,” Walker laughs. “And why the hell did you mention the band.”
“Because she’s been to see you play and… I don’t know,” Merrick shrugs. “I’m proud of you.”
“This guy,” Walker claps Merrick on the shoulder. “Has always been my biggest fan. If it wasn’t for him and his belief in us, I’m not sure we’d be nearly as successful as we are.”
That’s so sweet. My heart melts at his words.
Walker lets out a sigh and looks around the room before his gaze comes back to Merrick. “Even though you’re going to be a working stiff, don’t be a stranger. Come visit when you can.”
“I can say the same for you, and I expect my name and a plus one,” he squeezes my arm. “And backstage passes to all of your shows.”
“You tell Pen that, and if she agrees, you’re on,” Walker laughs. “No, but seriously, I’ll make sure you have tickets to any show you want.”
“Fuck, man,” Merrick grabs Walker in a big hug and slaps him on the back. “I’m going to miss you.”
“I don’t know why he thinks I’m going to forget about him,” Walker shakes his head. “I’ve known this guy since kindergarten. Kindergarten. And he magically thinks because I’m on the road—”
“And singing in front of hundreds of thousands of people with women throwing themselves at you night after night—”
“No, no,” Walker looks around like someone might overhear. “Don’t say shit like that.”
Merrick only laughs. “Chill, dude, Pen isn’t around. You’re so easy to fuck with.”
Walker wraps an arm around my shoulders and tries to pull me over to his side, but Merrick’s arms go around my waist, and he pulls my back to his front, all while growling. “And he wonders why I might forget him.”
I let them give each other shit for another few minutes, loving their friendship. It reminds me of Declan and me. Even though he’s my younger brother, he’s my best friend. The last year he’s lived with me has been the hardest and yet the best year of my life.
Pulling my phone out of my purse, I shoot Declan a text letting him know I’m thinking about him.
Roxie: I love you, little D.
Declan: Please stop calling me that.
Everyone thinks I have a small penis,
when you say that.
I laugh, making both Merrick and Walker look at me with curious looks on their faces.
“What’s so funny?” Merrick asks.
“My brother’s text. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you.” My phone vibrates.
Declan: I love you too.
Is your weekend on?
Roxie: Yes, he’s saying goodbye to his friend now.
I’ll see you Monday.
A throat clears, getting my attention. When I look up, Walker smiles at me. “It was good meeting you, Roxie. I have a feeling I’ll be seeing more of you.”
“It was good to meet you too. I hope to be around for a long time, and I look forward to hearing more of your music.”
Merrick links our fingers together.
Walker’s phone lights up, and he frowns down at his phone. “I’ve gotta go, man, but I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks, man,” Merrick gives him a small smile.
With his hands down at his sides, Walker gives a low wave as he starts to walk away.
It’s a sad moment. I think they realize how much life changes once you’re finally out of school. If what I saw between them is anything to go by, I don’t think they have to worry about growing apart. They’ll be friends for life.
“Are you ready to go?” Merrick asks.
I don’t answer him. Instead, I wrap him in a big hug and don’t let go until he pulls away, letting him get what he needs in the moment.
“Thanks for that. Let’s get out of here.” He’s quiet as we make our way through what’s left of the crowd and outside into the heat.
Merrick peels off his robe and quickly removes his tie. “I’m not sure why we had to dress up when these damn robes hide everything.”
“I don’t know either.”
“Where are you parked?” I point in the direction of my car. “Do you mind if we take your car to my house? I decided to walk instead of trying to find a parking place that’s almost as far away as my house.”
“Not at all,” I tell him, not wanting him out of my sight for even a moment.
We’re quiet as we make our way to my car. I’m not sure what he’s thinking, but I’m running through everything to make sure I’ve taken care of everything for our weekend.
I spot my car and drag him along with me. I hit the button to unlock it and hear the chirp of the alarm turn off. Once inside, I turn the car on and blast the air conditioner to cool us both off. Before we leave, I run one finger along his arm and down to his hand. Merrick doesn’t leave me hanging. Taking my hand in his, he smiles.
Turning, I cup his face with my other hand. “Are you okay?”
“Better than okay. I’m feeling all kinds of ways today. I feel like I lost one person while I gained another. In two weeks, I start my dream job, and I need to find a new place to live. It all feels like a dream.”
“It’s a lot for one day,” I agree.
“To see you standing there today… it’s a good day.”
“I know you said you could, but if you can’t go away this weekend, I’ll understand. It’s very last minute. If your family—”
“They already said their congratulations and goodbyes. The only plans I had for the weekend were to look for a place to live. I have to be out of my place by the end of the month. As soon as we get to my place and I pack a bag, we can start our life together.”
I like the sound of that. Having a life with Merrick is not something I ever let myself believe would happen, and now to know he still wants me after all this time only further assures me what we have is real. I bite the tip of my tongue to keep myself from asking him to move in with me and not bother looking at places. I hold back. Barely. Maybe I should see how we cohabitate with each other for the weekend before I mention it.
Not wanting to waste any more time, I put my car into reverse and back out of my parking spot. It doesn’t take us long to get to Merrick’s house. Cars line the road almost the entire way to his place. He was right not to bother driving.
This time when I step inside, the place isn’t as neat and clean as it was before. In fact, it’s downright disgusting as we walk side by side through the living room and down the hallway to his room. The place smells like pizza, stale beer, and dirty socks.
Opening his bedroom door, I’m met with a room that’s clean and tidy. Even his bed is made, which is more than I can say about myself. I don’t see the point when I’m going to sleep in it again.
I stay by the door and watch as he pulls a duffle bag out of his closet and starts throwing clothes in it. Kicking off his black dress shoes, he starts to undo his belt when he spots me. “You know you can come in and sit down.”
“I know, but I think it’s for the best if I stay where I am if we want to get there before dark.”
I’m desperate to touch him and to have Merrick’s hands on me, and I know if we start something, it will be hours before we come up for air. I can’t take my eyes off him as he undresses in front of me, and each inch of his perfectly toned and tanned body is exposed to me. I grab onto the door handle to keep my balance.
“I like the way you think,” he murmurs as if he can read my mind. “I’ll be right back. Let me go grab me a few things from the bathroom, and then I’ll be ready to hit the road.”
* * *
Four hours later, we pull up to the cabin I rente
d for us. The sun is close to setting as we step out of the car and look at the cabin. It’s small and cute with a wrap-around porch and a couple of rocking chairs. “Come on,” I grab his hand and pull him up the steps. “It’s small, but I thought it would be perfect for our first weekend getaway,” I say as I put in the code on the door to unlock it.
“It’s perfect. As long as there’s a bed, I don’t care about anything else.”
Opening the door, we’re met with a rustic living room and kitchen. The best part is the whole back of the cabin is windows, giving us the perfect view of the lake and the setting sun.
“Roxie, this is…”
“Beautiful,” I supply for him. When he only nods, I pull him through the tiny area and out onto the deck that houses a hot tub. “What do you say we watch the sunset from in there?” My eyes flick to the hot tub even as I start to slip my sandals off.
Not wasting any time, Merrick grabs his t-shirt by the back of the neck and pulls it off. Why is that move so insanely hot? Lifting my dress at the hem, I slowly pull it up and over my head. As I throw it on the deck, Merrick removes the rest of his clothes.
His long, thick cock is standing at attention, pointing straight at me, making me lick my lips.
“Fucking hell, you’re perfection,” he growls.
Reaching behind my back, I unclip my bra and slide the straps down my arms, letting it fall to the ground, all while never taking my eyes off the gorgeous man standing in front of me.
His eyes are darker than I’ve ever seen them before. I can tell from here he’s breathing faster. He takes a step forward, and I think he’s going to lunge for me and devour me, but instead, he throws off the cover to the hot tub. I watch as his back muscles and ass flex with the movement.
“The way you look at me drives me wild,” he says as he starts slowly stroking his cock. “Now hurry up and take off your underwear before I rip them off.”
I wouldn’t be opposed to the idea, but I do as he asks and slide them over my hips and down my legs before I let them pool at my feet. Once I’m completely undressed, I’m rooted to the spot as I watch Merrick stroke himself.
Basic Chemistry: LOVE 101 - WILLOW BAY NOVELLA Page 11