Her Hometown Redemption
Page 8
She steadfastly held his gaze, revealing the old Tanya was still there, albeit a little deeper under the surface. “I wanted to come back and start a new business. I came back in the hope someone, if not everyone, would give me a second chance to prove I’ve changed. Sasha gave me that chance. I want to give her back her money and more.” She dropped her gaze to his mouth. “I wanted to tell you I’m sorry, and to at least have you talk to me, even if you can’t forgive me.”
He took a sip of his wine. “I think you’re still suffering from the loss of your job. In fact, I think you are nowhere near as steady about things as you’re trying to convince me or yourself.”
“I’m trying my best, Liam. That’s all I can do, isn’t it?”
“Yes, but until you’re honest with yourself and appreciate no one can go through life hurting people and expect to be happy, I’m going to find it hard to believe you’ve changed...that you even know how to be happy.”
She drew her gaze from his to stare into the depths of her wineglass. “Okay.”
Guilt edged in and Liam turned to face the stove. “I’m not the same guy who did anything to please you. Trusting you again is going to take time. I won’t risk getting involved with you again, and be left wondering every day if this is the day you up and leave after deciding Templeton, and me, aren’t what you need, after all.”
He turned.
A faint blush darkened her cheeks, clear evidence of just how much she’d changed. The old Tanya never wobbled beneath accusation or disappointment—which often led to plenty of people asking Liam what the hell he saw in her.
The answer was simple—no one knew her the way he did. Not her mum, Sasha or anyone else. He saw beneath the veneer and knew that the woman who let down her guard in the bedroom could learn to do so in public, too. The trouble was, she’d left before he had a chance to prove to her she didn’t need to hide all the time.
“I shouldn’t have asked you to kiss me.”
He stilled, his hand tightening around the spatula. “And I should’ve said no.”
“But you didn’t.”
Their eyes locked. “But that doesn’t mean there will be a next time. We had a moment of weakness. Right?” Say no. Say you want me. Just so I know I’m not the only one scared of giving in.
She nodded. “Right.”
He turned back to the stove, a strange mix of relief and disappointment swirling inside him.
“I made some bad investments and lost people a lot of money. Things went from bad to worse until I didn’t know which way to turn. In hindsight, I never should’ve buried my head in the sand. I should’ve admitted to someone I wasn’t coping.” She sighed. “Look, shall I just go? You don’t need to hear all this and I hate having to tell you.”
He faced her, and remorse that his words might have caused the tears in her eyes mixed with a jolt of passionate need for them to continue talking. He shook his head. “No. Let’s eat. You’ve answered one question, but I have plenty more.”
She moved away from him to pet the dogs who’d given up waiting for tidbits and were now sprawled on the floor. Her soft murmurings to them teased and tormented him. He’d be a liar if he didn’t acknowledge how much he wanted nothing more than to yank her to her feet, sling her over his shoulder and march her straight to his bedroom. Her vulnerability and the admission she had failed made her all the more attractive—and he didn’t like himself for it.
He gripped the spatula and tossed the second omelet onto a plate.
Weakening was not an option; wanting her was pure stupidity.
“Dinner’s served.” His voice was a low rumble from deep within his chest and he mentally kicked himself. Tanya knew him well enough to detect his mood just from his tone.
Now she would know he wanted her sexually, if nothing else.
She straightened, her gaze lingering on his for a moment, before she picked up her wine from the counter and resumed her seat by the island. He joined her, placing their plates on the table. The atmosphere crackled with unspoken words.
He took a seat and plucked knives and forks from the carousel beside him. “Here.”
“Thanks. This looks great.” She lifted her gaze to his, smiled and cut into her omelet.
Liam stared as she opened her mouth and took her first bite, her full lips closing seductively around the fork. He shifted position on his stool before forcing his gaze to his plate. He had to find a way to extinguish his desire for her. He couldn’t want her. To want her was too dangerous. He cleared his throat. “How’s your mum?”
“She’s fine. Not entirely happy I’ve come back here, but it’s my choice, not hers. I finally woke up and understood she likes nothing more than to run from the past. Something my brave little sister refused to do.”
He frowned. “What would Sasha have to run from?”
“It’s a long story.”
She bowed her head and guilt twisted Liam’s gut. She’d told him why she was back and he could guess how much it had taken for her to admit she’d messed up, let alone why. Maybe he owed her some of himself before he could expect more. He knew the rules. He knew the dance that lovers and ex-lovers performed...
He took another forkful of food and reached for his wine. “There’s been no one serious since you left, you know. A few dates. A few laughs. I work now. Like you did. That’s all I do, day and night. Mum’s well. Dad’s still gone, and I still occasionally venture to the Coast Inn to shoot a few games of pool with Scott, Kevin and Nick. I like good wine, I like to garden and cook. Maybe I’m the epitome of boring to you now, but that’s who I am. Your turn.”
She slowly lowered her fork. Her beautiful, dark brown eyes thoughtful. “Well, I’m...certainly humbler. I’m more aware of others, understand and respect that their desires are equally as important, if different, from mine. The need...” She shook her head, huffed out a laugh. “The need for more than a career is so strong it hurts sometimes.”
“The need for more what?”
Her cheeks flushed and she lifted her shoulders. “Family, I suppose. I want more people in my life.”
Words failed him as he looked into her eyes and nothing but soft sincerity stared back at him. He put down his glass. “I’m glad.”
She exhaled a shaky breath. “Are you lonely?”
He swallowed, cursing the heat that struck his face. “What sort of question is that?”
“A simple one. Are you lonely?”
“A little. Sometimes.” He took another sip of wine. “Aren’t you?”
“Sometimes.”
Liam grappled for the right thing to say to ward her off, to make her understand he wouldn’t play her games, or let her slide under his skin to his heart. He held her gaze. “And the loneliness most likely comes from my inability to trust after the way you left, and the things I’ve seen people say and do, in and out of the courtroom.”
She stared for a moment longer before nodding. “I understand.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” He clenched his jaw, hating his inability to control his temper around her. When in court, where it was safe, he never allowed a single emotion to slip through. But here, with her...
He inhaled. “But that’s in the past. I’ve tried to find what we had with someone else, but despite knowing who I am and being a better man for it, that doesn’t stretch to giving another woman what she deserves. All of me. I can’t do that since you, and it pisses me off.”
Tears glinted in her eyes. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, there hasn’t been a relationship of more than a few months for me, either.”
Liam cursed the surge of selfish relief. He took a sip of his wine. “Well, then, we’re both as bad as each other.”
“I don’t want you to trust me, Liam. I can’t be trusted.”
/> Jesus Christ. “What?”
“I’m... I’ve more going on in my life than I can deal with right now, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want little bits of hope, or that I won’t grab them wherever I can. Maybe it’s wrong, but when you look at me like you are now, I want to grab hope from you. But how can I do that when I’ve nothing to promise in return?”
Hating that his care for her could be so transparent, he frowned. “How am I looking at you?”
“Like I’m important. Wanted.”
He closed his eyes, wishing he could keep them shut if they gave so much away.
She cleared her throat. “I want to make a success of my new business. That’s enough for now. That, and waiting for the next person to walk into my office and tell me how hard it’s going to be for me to be accepted back here, is about as much as I can take for the time being.”
Liam opened his eyes. She pushed her food around her plate, her hand slightly trembling and her eyelids flickering as though she fought looking at him.
He shook his head. “I think you’ve come back here because of Sasha.”
She snapped her gaze to his, her eyes dark with wariness. “Why would you think that?”
He lifted his chin. “Am I right?”
She slowly put down her fork. “If I said you were right and I needed your help, would you help me?”
Adrenaline pumped through his veins. “She never told me what happened. Just that it was something involving Funland.”
Their gazes locked as inexplicable protectiveness inched through his body. He’d loved Tanya as the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, but he loved Sasha as a sister. Whatever Tanya told him, he sensed it would be impossible for him to turn away. More than that, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. Whatever was going on with Tanya and Sasha was serious and he didn’t want to regret not helping them.
The questions he’d held back from asking Sasha a year before tumbled from his mouth. “What happened between Sasha and your mum?” He frowned. “Why did you leave when she stayed? She wouldn’t give up the fair and then she did. If you need my help, my legal help, you need to let me in.”
Something at Funland had first brought Sasha, and now Tanya, to his door asking for help. Hell would freeze over if he wouldn’t find out what that something was...today.
He put down his fork and took her hand. “Tanya?”
She met his eyes and they shone with tears. “When everything started going wrong for me, when I made some bad investments, got into debt, I was scared. Really scared. I hoped it would somehow all go away. It didn’t. It got worse. No matter how much Sasha tried to help me, I pushed her away. When I...” She swallowed. “When I ended up in the hospital, suffering from...exhaustion, Sasha sat beside me for days. It wasn’t until she told me what happened to her at Funland that I truly understood Sasha’s strength, her goodness and how she would always make a success of her life no matter what. I owe her my life and I will pay her back.”
Liam’s heart beat painfully against his chest. Hospital? Exhaustion? He cleared his throat. “And how do you intend paying her back?”
Her eyes turned cold with an anger so fierce it turned her dark brown eyes to black. “She was molested at Funland. And I will find the man that did that to her. I will make sure he spends years behind bars.”
He froze. “What?”
“Someone hurt her, Liam, and I did absolutely nothing to help her.”
Revulsion and anger blended, pushing the bitter taste of vengeance into his mouth. “Who?”
“Matt Davidson.”
“Should I know that name?”
“No, but I do. It’s one I’ll never forget.”
The need to head straight for his computer and research the piece of shit who’d dared to touch his friend rolled through him. Tanya’s darkened gaze burned into his as comprehension dawned. “He’s in the Cove?”
“I don’t know.”
“But you’re planning to go after him anyway.”
She nodded, her gaze determined. “Yes. Will you help me?”
He stood, his body trembling with fury. He turned Tanya on her stool and pulled her into his arms. “Of course I will. You only ever had to ask.”
She kept her cheek to his chest and inhaled a shuddering breath. “How much did Sasha tell you about the sale of the fair?”
“Not much.” Unease and protectiveness seeped into his blood. “She said something about your mum being the reason why it fell into Kyle Jordon’s hands and that she’d never forgive her. I never understood how your mum could be responsible for Kyle owning Funland. Of course, we now know he used it to cover up probably more narcotic activity than even the police are aware of.”
Tanya pulled back. “Sasha didn’t tell you why the place consumed her like it did? Why she had to make it hers, no matter what?”
“No, but whatever the reason, I knew she wouldn’t rest until she owned it.”
She sighed. “She wanted Funland so she could change things. Do everything in her power to erase the memory of what happened to her there. She was hell-bent on repainting, remodeling, until she’d stripped away the evil and made the fair the same safe, happy place it was years ago.” She swiped her fingers under her eyes. “She wanted to establish it as a place of old-fashioned values and fun. Take it back to our Romany roots.”
“Which is why she insisted Kyle kept the Ferris wheel, the carousel...”
“Exactly.”
He ran his gaze over her face. “So it’s because of this Matt Davidson you’ve come back? It isn’t really about you starting over at all, but about avenging a past wrong?”
She turned her gaze to the window. “It’s both.”
“Did Sasha send you here to find him?”
She faced him. “No, but she knows what I’m doing. She and John tried hard to find Davidson. The police were involved for a while, but everything led to a dead end. I won’t let that happen this time. Sasha told me she’d do anything to see him imprisoned. Anything.”
Liam arched his eyebrow. “Even stand up in court? Be cross-examined?”
“Yes. At least I hope so. We haven’t got that far yet.”
“Maybe not, but you need to ask Sasha the question. If she says no to court and you go ahead with this manhunt anyway, this is more about you than her.”
She glared. “That’s not fair.”
“Tanya, I’m playing devil’s advocate here, but I want you to acknowledge you are going after Davidson for the right reasons. This cannot be about you.”
He released her and sat on an adjacent stool, his mind whirling with the suspicion she hadn’t changed as much as she liked to believe. If her motivations were steeped in the need to right a wrong, everything Tanya was doing was for herself more than Sasha, no matter what her heart might be telling her.
Even if that were true, it didn’t mean he could abandon her.
He took a fortifying gulp of his wine and turned to study her. “What is it you want me to do?”
Warning screamed in his head and habitual suspicion unfurled in his gut. Logic told him Tanya planned on doing something dangerous, if not illegal.
Relief showed in the slump of her shoulders. “Will you meet me at Funland tomorrow night?”
He frowned. “Why?”
“I’ll explain everything when we’re there.”
He studied her. How could he say no? If there was any chance of Tanya being exposed to danger, he could not let her walk into that danger alone. Funland was originally owned by her family, but eventually sold to Templeton’s most notorious crime lord, Kyle Jordon, before he bequeathed it to his son...now Sasha’s fiancé. Liam narrowed his eyes. Surely Sasha’s love for John was real and not a by-product of her obsession with the fair?
He shook the notion from his min
d. Sasha held more integrity in her little finger than most people did in their entire bodies. More often than not, her honesty became her downfall. She loved John. She loved him as Liam hoped to love somebody one day.
Leaning forward, he placed his forearm on the island. Tanya’s eyes were wide with undisguised insecurity. Something he’d not seen in all the years he’d known her. “Okay, I’ll meet you there.”
She smiled as her eyes glinted with unshed tears. “Thank you.”
CHAPTER SEVEN
TANYA PLANTED HER hands on her hips and looked around her office.
The memory of Liam gently squeezing her fingers and his encouraging wink when he’d dropped her at Sasha’s apartment last night lingered. She was happier and more optimistic than she’d been in months, and on top of that, she had a fledging friendship with the man who still held a place in her heart despite their years apart. With Liam helping her, Tanya was confident they would track Davidson down.
Her attraction to Liam burned with the same heat it had before, but she would keep her feelings buried unless he gave a signal he wanted to rekindle their previous relationship. She still felt undeserving of his love, even though that didn’t stop her from wanting it.
She wandered across the office, picking up one of the four prints she’d bought from a local artist showcasing his work on the promenade that afternoon. Dwelling on the past would do no good for the future. Wasn’t that what her long-suffering doctor had advised her time and again? She held the painting against one of the walls and tilted her head in consideration.
Deciding it looked good, she walked to her desk and picked up a small hammer and nail. Wishing she could knock her lingering anxiety on the head as easily as she would the nail, she glanced toward her closed desk drawer. Inside were her pills.