Deserts Of Naroosh

by Bradford Bates

“Damn straight you are.” ShadowLily pointed at the others riding out of the oasis. “Now, let's go prove it.”

  Eight hours later, the desert had a few sparse shrubberies.

  Tim thought of all the times he bitched about having to run between cities in older games. He hated it then. It felt like such a waste of time when he wanted to be out slashing, cutting, killing. Ugh, and being a healer back then meant leveling at a snail's pace unless the player had a dedicated group. In most games today, things were much simpler.

  Not in The Etheric Coast.

  Traveling in Eternia took some time unless they were zipping through portals. Their access to the portal network made the journey between cities instantaneous, but from there they were just like everyone else. At least now that they’d made friends they had access to horses. Walking was for suckers. Plus, the long rides gave him a chance to think, and that was one of his favorite things to do.

  With his new pants having a conversation with himself was easier than ever before.

  He knew the others were taking the time to update their skills or work on side projects while they rode, but not all of them. Not unless flirting was considered a skill. If it was, Tim judged Lorelei to be in the master ranks already. He might not be a lesbian, but he knew when he saw the chemistry train pulling into the station. So while the others worked or tinkered and Lorelei flirted, he handled some of the business matters he’d been putting off.

  Tim sent a letter to Mr. Applebottom to check on the status of their projects and to find out if he needed access to any additional funds, or if they had enough in their reserves to start any of his more eccentric ventures. When he’d done that, he sent a letter to Judy and asked if there was anything he could get her to make her life easier. The woman would be considered a saint back in the real world. It took a special kind of person to dedicate their life to others. When he got back to Promethia, maybe he could do something special for her, like buy her a new house.

  No one deserved it more than Judy.

  Thanks to Tim’s efforts to revitalize the slums, real estate there was getting harder to come by. He’d been able to secure a large percentage of the land with Mr. Applebottom’s help. Right up until they put in the market kiosk, the slums had been a buyer’s market. Now people wanted in, and he was lucky enough to be in the position of deciding who got the golden tickets. It was his job to rent to businesses that would thrive.

  When the merchants made money so did he.

  Rent from the new buildings was coming in at a steady flow. He kept ten percent of the proceeds in his personal account and reinvested the rest into his projects. It was an aggressive strategy but one that kept him ahead of the other investors trying to profit off the work he’d accomplished by cobbling the street and refurbishing the buildings. While the money he was making was important, he was surprised by the joy he felt in helping others find success.

  Sometimes all it took was a small nudge to get a person going in the right direction. A clean place to live, a safe place to sleep, and a belly full of food didn’t have to be a luxury. It was amazing how much more productive people were when they didn’t have to worry about the details all the time. People talked down to the poor, but some of them were the hardest-working people he knew.

  His parents worked their asses off to give him a chance.

  The older he got, the more he appreciated their sacrifice. The fact they didn’t consider dedicating all of themselves to their children as a sacrifice said all you needed to say about how much his parents loved their children. Every choice his parents made was to make sure he and his siblings had the chance to succeed, and now in a small way, he was able to offer the same opportunity to others.

  Even if they were only ones and zeros.

  Tim pulled up his interface and looked around. He didn’t spend nearly as much time going through the system as he should, but he knew there was a way to check his bank account remotely. He’d have to find it. A few minutes later, he found the right tab and was able to verify just how much was coming from his little ventures and why Mr. Applebottom hadn’t asked him for anything additional yet. His eyes settled on the figure, and he closed them, sure he’d seen the number wrong, then drew a deep breath.

  They’d been adventuring for a long time, and he hadn’t needed gold for anything except for crafting materials and food, so he hardly ever looked at his stash let alone his bank account. So the shock at seeing the number of coins listed was astonishing, to say the least. The fact that this was only ten percent of his earnings and would continue to grow was an even more mind-blowing thought.

  Tim looked at the number three thousand a few more times before finally believing the truth. He was rich. Shit, if the slums kept trucking along he’d probably never have to adventure again if he didn’t want to. Right now he was having way too much fun to give it up, and he was dying to find out how the story would unfold.

  There was no way to know the exact real-world value of the gold without going to the currency exchange, but it was probably close to sixty thousand dollars. He’d have to sell some of this off and pocket the earnings before the market devalued. The longer players played, the less currency was worth. A gold today might be worth a copper a year from now. There was no way to know if Mr. Applebottom could handle that for him too, but it was worth a shot so he sent him a quick message about what he wanted to do.

  Tim had learned the importance of taking care of the people you cared about as a child. Sometimes you did that by being there, and other times you did it by helping out financially. He’d never met a person in life who didn’t hit a rough patch or another from time to time. The one constant was that when a person offered to help they always did it with love. Today he was going to share some of the love with his favorite people in the world.

  Tim filled out a transfer request for three hundred gold coins and sent it to each member of his party, and put an extra three hundred in the guild bank for a rainy day. He wouldn’t be in the position he was in to make this kind of coin without his guild. Sometimes saying thank you didn’t feel like a big enough gesture. What was the fun in being rich if you couldn’t share it with the people who got you there?

  “What the fuck?” JaKobi looked around in confusion. “Bossman, I think there’s been a big mistake.”

  “Did you get the same alert I did?” Cassie looked at her boyfriend, searching for confirmation.

  They whispered to each other for a moment and broke apart. “Explain,” they demanded in unison.

  Tim felt pretty good right now. The sun was down, and all his friends were smiling. When life was good, it paid to celebrate a little. “I had a few investments come through with my projects and thought I’d share.” He gave them all a stern look. “Don’t get used to it.”

  Who was he kidding? If the money kept coming in like it was now, he’d be happy to continue sharing it once he cashed out some additional money for his parents. Everyone in the guild worked hard to be the best at what they did. It wasn’t their fault that Lady Briarthorn and the High Priest had given him a huge leg up in the game with an early quest chain. Without the generous gift, he wouldn’t be in the position he was in now. It was a good spot of luck.

  Or maybe it was fate.

  “Probably should have saved this for after the fight. I can already see Cassie trying to decide what to buy at the auction house.” JaKobi laughed when she scowled at him. “That girl really loves her shopping.”

  Cassie snorted. “I’m not shopping right now. You can’t buy anything away from a kiosk. What I’m doing right now is called window shopping.”

  “Ah, the old look and don’t buy trick.” ShadowLily giggled. “I’ve never been very good at that myself.”

  Tim grinned from ear to ear. It was nice to see everyone happy after spending the entire afternoon and evening riding to their destination. The only person who looked slightly confused was Neema. She hadn’t gotten an alert and probably thought that the heat made them all lose their damn minds.
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  The sparse bits of shrubbery scattered around the landscape were becoming more frequent. Tim didn’t see another oasis anywhere, but there had to be some kind of water source nearby. This was the most life they’d seen in the desert outside of the oasis itself.

  There were a few shapes Tim couldn’t quite make out in front of them, but Neema didn’t seem concerned. A few minutes later their guide stopped at a railing and dismounted from her horse. She tied her reins around the rail and moved to get something from her saddlebags.

  Neema lit her torch with a spark from the flint she carried around her neck. The Desert Wolf didn’t wait for them to dismount before she walked off into the darkness alone. As Tim tied his horse to the railing, several other torches lit in an ever-growing circle. Inside it was a cluster of tents and a fire pit.

  It looked like a great place to catch a few winks.

  “Welcome to Shangri-la.” Neema held her hands out with a flourish and cracked up.

  “This place might not look like much after visiting the oasis, but it puts us about halfway between our two targets. After your fight with the Zerker, you can wait out the heat of the day here before taking on the Daughters.”

  Neema moved toward one of the tents and tossed her stuff inside. “I’ll be here when you get back. I might even have dinner ready and waiting if you don’t take too long.” She shrugged. “Or breakfast if you get lost on your way back.”

  JaKobi rubbed his back. “So straight to the next fight, huh?” He looked at the tents with a longing expression.

  “I vote we take down the Zerker and get some solid Z’s,” Lorelei stated. “You know me. I don’t like wasting time.”

  ShadowLily looked at Neema’s tent. “No, you don’t.”

  “Shut it,” Lorelei snapped, but with a grin on her face that said, you might have busted me, but I don’t care. “I can’t help that I’m gifted with the ladies.”

  Tim felt a small chuckle escape his lips but cut it off as the two women rounded on him. He held up his hands in surrender before pointing back at the horses. “So is it Zerker time?”

  Cassie decided for all of them. “Let’s go get this fucker.” She jumped back into the saddle and turned in the direction of the Zerker’s encampment.

  “Couldn’t have said it better myself.” Tim hopped into his saddle and followed their tank into the dark desert night.

  Chapter Thirty

  The skulls on spikes were a nice touch.

  As if the creepy wavering torchlight wasn’t enough, nothing said stay the fuck off my lawn like the decapitated heads of your visitors. Not that the Zerker had a lawn. The front of his fort was a long dirty trail of blood and regrets. Anyone dumb enough to come here probably had their heads on one of the spikes, or maybe a body part hanging from the fort's wall.

  Tim wasn’t going to try and count the skulls. He would probably have more luck with the bodies hanging from the gates or maybe assuming it was a greater number than he’d like to think possible. His general feel of the place was, this was exactly what hell looked like. He imagined the perfect torture for the worst of the worst would be getting sent here, to be killed and consumed on repeat forever.

  That was the kind of thing that would make a person reexamine their life choices.

  For the people who died here, this very well might have been hell on earth, but at least they wouldn’t have to repeat the experience in the afterlife. Once Tim and his friends killed the Zerker he hoped it brought some justice to their souls.

  If nothing else, burning this fort to the ground when they left would improve the smell of the place. The stench of rotting flesh was bad enough, but throwing it under the giant heat lamp in the sky made it a million times worse. The buzzing flies almost drowned out the reek. Most animals had the good sense not to leave corpses around where they slept. Not even the fiercest of creatures wanted to be annoyed by flies in the middle of the night.

  As they drew closer to the gates, Tim realized he could make out bite marks on some of the limbs lying in the sand. Even one or two of the heads fresh enough to have skin looked like they’d had their cheeks gnawed on. It was one thing to see something like this on the big screen, but experiencing it in person was something else.

  Part of him was fascinated by movies and shows about cannibalism. It was one of the most depraved acts a human could do. Sure it looked insane when you saw it happen in a movie like Green Inferno, but when Hannibal did it on the TV show, there was an entirely new twist.

  He made food that looked delicious.

  That was the worst part of the show. The food looked so good that the viewers wanted to eat it, but also knew he made that meal out of the gardener. It was like watching Iron Chef. Only, the secret ingredient was people. Until it wasn’t. Having dinner at Doctor Lector’s was like rolling the dice.

  People or animals, his guests never knew.

  One thing they never showed in the movies or the shows was how people would have reacted. Imagine climbing into bed and turning on the local news for a minute only to see the man you had dinner with last week being arrested as a cannibal. How badly would that freak a person out?

  What a mindfuck.

  None of that psychotic finesse was on display here. The Zerker was pure animal. He took what he wanted at the time and tossed the rest away as if it was a slice of tomato that fell from his sandwich instead of a person.

  Just looking around this place disgusted Tim to the point he wished he could nuke it from orbit and be done with it.

  “JaKobi, any chance you're strong enough to pull a meteor down on this place?” Tim turned away from the gruesome displays left by the Zerker to look at his new best bud.

  The fire mage thrust his arms into the air, then brought them down with a dramatic flourish. He looked around as though he expected a meteor to have come down and was surprised not to see one.

  JaKobi looked at Tim and winked. “I was this close.” He held his fingers about an inch apart. “I swear.”

  “I think a simple ‘no’ would have sufficed.” Tim probably would have laughed at JaKobi’s antics, but the vibe of this place had him down. “When we leave I want you to burn all of this to the ground.”

  JaKobi’s eyes pulsed with an orange glow. “It would be my pleasure.”

  A scream coming from the fort made all of them turn and focus on the gates.

  A woman in ripped and bloody clothes sprinted out the open door. She kept glancing over her shoulder as she raced forward.

  A limping man appeared next. “Run, Fria!”

  He made it three more steps before an ax slammed into his back. The man crashed to the ground, and his hands clawed at the sand as he tried to pull himself forward. Fria turned to see where he was and skidded to a halt. Before Tim could call a warning, she ran back to the wounded man.

  Zerker exited the fort next with a casual swagger. It was the kind of walk that said, I’m not in any kind of a hurry because there’s nowhere to go. He wasn’t what Tim expected. Most of the bosses they faced were gigantic, but Zerker couldn’t have been over seven feet tall. He also wasn’t a walking tank like Dracon. The man was thin to the point of starvation, but thick, lean muscle covered his body.

  Fria tried to drag the man with her while he screamed for her to drop him and run. The Zerker ripped his tomahawk-like ax free from the man’s back with methodical precision, flipped the grip in his hand, and brought the sharp pointy end down on Fria’s skull like it was a pickaxe. She dropped dead at his feet, and he pulled the weapon free with a grunt sending a shower of blood and skull across his legs.

  “What in the actual fuck?” Lorelei whispered.

  At the sound of her voice, the Zerker looked up and saw them for the first time. “Have you come to feed the beast?”

  “Feed you deez nuts!” JaKobi grabbed himself in a way that would have made the men who filmed Braveheart proud.

  “Crunchy, but not my favorite part.” The Zerker pulled a matching hatchet free from his belt. “With you,
I think I’ll start with the tongue.”

  Cassie spat on the ground. “You want a piece of my man’s sweet ass you gotta go through me.”

  “Little, kind of sour. Probably have to tenderize the shit out of her to get anything worth snacking on.” The Zerker spoke to himself as if he forgot they were there.

  Laughter bubbled from the general’s lips with the insanity of an imprisoned Renfield. “No one ever comes to play anymore. I’m so tired of the screaming. It’s so tiresome when all they do is beg, and all I want is a fight.”

  The Zerker smiled at them, revealing teeth that he’d filed to points. “You did come to play, didn’t you?”

  “I’ve heard about enough of this shit. Go and hit him with your stick.” Not the most elegant command Tim had ever given to start a fight, but it would do. He made a shooing motion toward Cassie. “Go get ’em.”

  With just the right amount of attitude for a tank, Cassie flipped Tim the bird and ran toward the boss. “Let’s see if we can work on that oral hygiene.”

  Tim watched Cassie wind back as though she was going to use her bō staff as a bat. The blow was aimed right at the boss’s head, but he didn’t even try to move. Right before the staff would have caved in half of the Zerker’s skull, the tomahawk came up and blocked the attack.

  Cassie was too stunned by the sudden change in the outcome to recover, and the Zerker slashed her across the belly with his hatchet.

  Who Needs a Shield was the first thing Tim cast. Yes, he needed to heal her, but the damage resistance and buff to Cassie’s already outrageous dodge chance felt paramount. Next on the list was a blast of Healing Orb to take the edge off the tank's immediate needs. His opening rotation wouldn't have been complete without also casting Curse of Giving on the boss.

  This fight already felt like it was spinning out of control, and it just started.

  Cassie was moving at full speed now, her single staff a disadvantage against the two axes. She seemed to have found her rhythm though and was moving just enough to stay relatively damage-free. With the tank now having firm control of the boss, it was time for the DPS to get to work.