Rogue

by Karen Lynch

  Pain lanced through me, but it was quickly consumed by my rage.

  “Don’t say his name.”

  “It’s your fault he’s dead, you know. He gave you his strength through the bond, didn’t he? He would have survived the change if not for you.” She shook her head. “How does it feel to know you killed your own mate?”

  I knew she was baiting me, but the truth in her words flayed open my soul. Nikolas had sacrificed himself for me. He was dead because of me. I would carry that with me for the rest of my life.

  Her words served their purpose. I didn’t react fast enough when she flew at me, and she was able to pin me to the ground.

  “Looks like old Azar was wrong about you,” she gloated as her fangs extended.

  Shouts from inside the house tore her attention from me, and I sent another powerful blast into her. She flew backward and landed a dozen feet away. Smoked curled from the ends of her blond hair, and her fair skin had taken on a slightly gray pallor. Her movements were slower when she got to her feet this time to face off with me.

  “Oh dear God. Elena!”

  The two of us turned our heads to look at the blond warrior standing near the door. Tristan’s face was etched in shock and pain as he stared at the sister he’d lost many years ago. Behind him stood Chris and Desmund. I should have felt joy at seeing them, but all I felt was anguish and rage. They were too late.

  “Tristan,” Elena simpered, giving him an angelic smile.

  Her brother stood frozen as a dozen warriors spilled into the courtyard and fanned out around us. Chris and Desmund moved toward Elena with their swords raised.

  My voice resonated through the courtyard. “She’s mine.”

  “Sara,” Chris began.

  The grief tried to surface again, but the rage smothered it. “She killed him. She is mine.”

  Chris looked past me to the body lying in the snow. Sorrow filled his eyes, but he didn’t speak. He nodded and stepped back.

  Desmund hesitated then did the same.

  Elena let out a girlish laugh. “It’s like a family reunion. My beloved brother and cousin, and of course my darling niece. If you’d only arrived a little earlier, Tristan, you could have given me away at my wedding.”

  Everyone stared at her, but I knew what she was doing. She was stalling, trying to throw them off while she recovered from my last attack. When Elena’s eyes shifted to me, I saw her real intent. My body buzzed with electricity as I coiled to attack.

  In a blur, she was gone, leaving behind nothing but a trail in the snow beyond the courtyard.

  A roar of pure rage scorched my throat and blackness filled my eyesight. A second later, I was standing in the middle of a frozen lake that lay behind the house. I threw up my hands as Elena came out of the darkness, her eyes rounded in disbelief. The blast lit up the night, and chunks of ice flew from the surface of the lake when her body slammed into it.

  I ignored the shouts from the shore as I stalked toward the vampire who was already getting to her feet. Her arrogant sneer was gone now, replaced by fear and pain. She feinted to her left and then sped to the right. Instead of giving chase, my bare feet planted on the ice, and I called to the magic in the lake. Elena skidded to a stop as a jagged wall of ice erupted in her path. She whirled in the other direction, but the wall moved faster. Within seconds, the two of us were enclosed inside a dome of solid ice.

  Panic showed on her face and she tried to use her vampire strength to punch through the ice. Every molecule of frozen water around us was connected to me, and the moment her hand touched the ice, magic coiled around her wrist. She screamed as it snaked up her arm, branding her skin.

  I released her, and she stumbled back, clutching her arm to her chest. Her expression was a mix of fear and hatred when she turned to face me.

  “Impressive display, niece. Too bad you couldn’t use your magic to save dear, sweet Nikolas.”

  My body trembled as my Mori fought to take over, to destroy the thing that had killed our mate. I held it back and watched Elena as she walked along the wall of ice, looking for an escape.

  “Do you want to hear about our time together while you were locked up in my cell, what his sweet blood tasted like on my tongue? Maybe you’d prefer to hear about how my hands ran over his naked body as I forced him to take my blood into him. The change is never easy, but it is agonizing for a Mohiri. Do you know he called out for you when the pain tore through his body?”

  A scream welled up from deep within me, and my fragile hold on my sanity threatened to shatter as the demon pushed to the surface. The ice groaned beneath my feet. The walls shook, and shards of ice fell around us as the entire dome threatened to drop onto our heads.

  Elena smiled. That was exactly what she wanted.

  I smiled back. “I met a powerful Hale witch who could also see the future. He told me the ones hunting me would give me the power to become the thing they fear the most. I thought he meant you would fear me because I could make you human again, but I was wrong. I finally get what he was telling me.

  “You hunted me, and you hurt the people I love. You did everything in your power to destroy me. You took my power and held me prisoner. You won, but that wasn’t enough for you. You had to take him from me.”

  My laugh sounded mad to my own ears. “And now look at me. You brought me here. You made me into this. It looks like Azar was right after all. Madeline’s half-blood daughter will destroy you. I guess Azar forgot to tell you that you would be the one to make his vision come true.”

  I walked toward her and she ran for the other side of the small space we occupied. A smile curved my lips, and the walls began to move, closing in on us. Grief poked around the edges of the rage, and I knew I would not be able to keep it at bay much longer. It was time to end this.

  When Elena realized there was nowhere else to run, she faced me in a last stand. Ice sprung from the wall behind her and encased her small body despite her attempts to break it. She was no match for the magic of the whole lake that had come to do my bidding.

  Standing over her with so much power coursing through me, I had never felt so alive, yet dead and empty inside at the same time.

  A shard of ice flew into my outstretched hand. I ran my other hand along the ice, and a long thin blade formed under my fingers. It was blue with golden threads running through it, and the hilt was an exact replica of the one on Nikolas’s sword.

  My eyes met Elena’s. I wanted to make her suffering go on forever because that was how long mine would last. Instead, I raised my weapon as I’d seen Nikolas do countless times.

  “He was mine,” I said as the razor sharp blade sliced through her throat.

  The sword slipped from my fingers and shattered, and the dome of ice crumbled around me. On the other side, Chris, Tristan, and Desmund stood transfixed as I walked toward them. Tristan reached for me, but I pulled away from him. Chris’s hand touched my arm as I passed, but he didn’t try to stop me as I walked back to the shore.

  Warriors stared at me as I entered the courtyard and went to where Nikolas’s body still lay in the snow. Sitting on the ground, I pulled his head and shoulders into my lap. My hands trembled as I stroked his face and ran my fingers through his soft hair. He liked to touch my hair whenever he held me, and I’d always found it so soothing. I touched the still lips and remembered his smiles and the beautiful gray eyes that had looked at me with love such a short time ago. I could still feel the bond that connected us, but it was empty like a phantom limb. It was a jagged hole inside of me that would never be filled.

  My rage faded and I rocked back and forth as waves of grief crashed down on me. Why did you make me love you and then leave me?

  Tristan knelt beside me. “Sara, we have to –”

  “No.” I hugged Nikolas tighter, prepared to fight anyone who tried to separate us. “Leave us alone.”

  “No one is going to take him from you,” Tristan said gently. “Let us move you both somewhere warmer.”

  �
��Nikolas doesn’t get cold.” And I would never be warm again.

  Chris sat on his haunches on my other side. “Nikolas would want you to take care of yourself. You can’t stay out here.”

  I shook off the hand he laid on my shoulder. “He needs me. I won’t leave him.”

  “Here, little one.” Desmund wrapped a thick blanket around my shoulders. I grabbed the edges and pulled it over Nikolas and me, blocking out the rest of the world. I’m here, Nikolas. I won’t let them take you from me.

  My Mori shifted restlessly, making me aware that we were still joined. After everything we’d been through, we had finally become one. You would have been so proud of me, Nikolas.

  It was strange sharing my mind with another consciousness, trying to filter out its emotions from my own. It moved again as it tried to settle in, and a host of emotions and sensations washed over me. One sensation reminded me of Nikolas so acutely it was like a knife in my chest.

  Stop, I said. Don’t do that thing you used to do when he –

  Butterfly wings caressed my mind so softly they were like a memory.

  Now I’m going crazy. Please, don’t do this to me.

  The demon quieted.

  I let out a long, ragged sigh. Maybe going crazy was better than never feeling him again. I stroked the planes of his face, as familiar to me as my own. I don’t know if I can bear this. I’m not as strong as you thought I was, Nikolas. I’m so lost without you.

  A memory of him holding me filled my mind. I could feel the warmth of his arms, his love wrapping around me.

  Oh, Nikolas.

  Sara.

  Solmi? my Mori cried.

  My hands stilled and I forgot to breathe. Nikolas?

  I’m here, Sara.

  Oh God, I am going crazy.

  I felt another soft caress against my mind. Feel my face, Sara.

  I laid my palm against his cheek and felt... warmth. Please. I bent over him until my mouth hovered about his. A second later, I felt a shallow breath against my lips.

  I sat up and shouted frantically. “He’s alive!”

  Tristan and Chris were beside me in an instant. “No, Sara, he’s gone,” Tristan said hoarsely.

  I grabbed his hand and held it above Nikolas’s mouth.

  “Jesus Christ, he’s breathing.”

  Chris shot to his feet. “Get the healers,” he shouted. He looked down at me. “We need to move him inside.”

  I nodded, and he lifted Nikolas easily. I ran beside him as he carried Nikolas into the house. The place was trashed, and there were vampire bodies everywhere. Chris found what looked like a guestroom on the main floor and laid Nikolas on the bed.

  I’m here, Nikolas.

  Two healers I recognized from Westhorne ran into the room, carrying medical bags. I had to move aside to give them room, and my heart thundered in my chest as they worked on him. I listened to them discussing his vital signs and debating the best treatment. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore.

  “Just help him, goddammit!” I screamed at them. I was not going to lose him a second time. My heart couldn’t survive it.

  I’m not going anywhere, Sara.

  If you do, I’ll never forgive you.

  One of the healers produced a syringe, which she inserted into Nikolas’s chest. I held my breath as she checked his pulse and breathing. She looked at me and smiled, and my legs almost gave out.

  “He’s suffered some trauma around his heart, but nothing that won’t heal,” she explained kindly. “He should wake up soon. He’s very strong.”

  My heart was close to bursting. “Yes, he is.”

  Tristan and the healers stepped out of the room to talk. Chris brought in fresh blankets to place over Nikolas, and his smile was so big his dimples showed. “You two are definitely meant for each other. I don’t know which one of you is more stubborn.”

  “Him.” I sat on the edge of the bed and held Nikolas’s warm hand. My emotions were such a mess I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. My body decided for me, and hot tears spilled down my face.

  Shhh, don’t cry. A gentle wave of warm energy came through the bond at the same time that Nikolas’s fingers closed around mine.

  Then you better hurry up and get better, because I’m a bit of a basket case right now.

  His lips twitched slightly at one corner. I’d heal a lot faster if I could hold my mate.

  He didn’t have to ask me twice. I climbed in beside him and curled against his side with my cheek resting above his heart so I could hear every precious beat. “Is this real? Because if I’m dreaming, I never want to wake up.”

  It’s real. I’m here, moy malen’kiy voin.

  “How is this possible?” My throat closed off until I could barely speak. “I felt you die.”

  You killed the vamhir demon. My Mori just needed time to recover. You brought me back.

  A sob escaped me and I pressed my face against his chest. “Please, don’t leave me again.”

  His arm moved slowly to wrap around me. “Never.”

  Chapter 26

  “I still can’t believe that all this time, Tristan’s little sister was the Master.”

  “You’re not the only one.”

  Roland shook his head. “That’s messed up... and really creepy when you think about it.”

  A shiver ran through me. “You’re telling me.” I’d spent the last two weeks trying to put those nightmarish days behind me. I still woke every night in a cold sweat with Nikolas holding me and whispering that we were safe and together. He had fully recovered from his physical injuries, but our spiritual wounds would take a lot longer to heal. Every day it got a little easier, and one day we’d be able to put our ordeal behind us.

  You okay? Nikolas’s hand covered mine on my lap. It still amazed me how good he was at reading my emotions and knowing exactly what I needed. Like this trip to New Hastings.

  Yes. I looked at the people sitting around the living room of the apartment. Roland and Peter were there, of course. I couldn’t have a homecoming without them. Jordan had come with us to “see where it all started” as she put it. Chris was here for old times’ sake.

  “So how is Tristan handling all of it?” Peter asked.

  “Good, considering,” Chris said quietly. “He arranged for her burial, and he had to tell my mother and their parents about her. They’re taking it hard, as expected.”

  My chest tightened when I thought about Tristan. He’d been devastated about Elena, and racked with guilt over what she had done to Nikolas and me. I’d told him he was no more responsible for what she had done than he was for what had happened to her. One day he would see I was right, but for now he was grieving his sister all over again. After the burial, he’d immersed himself in work. He spoke very little except to Desmund, who was a good friend and a confidante, just as Tristan had been for him for so many years.

  It was through Desmund that I’d learned Madeline had finally contacted Tristan two days ago. The Master’s death had freed Madeline from her compulsion and she no longer had to live in fear. According to Desmund, Tristan and Madeline had talked for a long time, and Tristan had looked happy for the first time in weeks. Maybe rebuilding his relationship with his daughter would help him through his grief.

  I had no plans to build anything with Madeline, but even I couldn’t stay mad at someone forever. Maybe, someday. For now, I was glad she had reached out to her father.

  Roland exhaled loudly. “Tristan’s a good guy. Hate to hear he’s having such a rough time.”

  “Me too,” Peter said.

  Jordan looked at me and her expression said she’d had enough of the sad talk. “This is a nice place, Sara, but it’s small and so quiet. How did you stand it?”

  Nikolas and Chris laughed. “It wasn’t this quiet the last time we were here,” Nikolas told her.

  Chris made a face. “I seem to recall taking a vacation after my time in Maine.” He looked at Nikolas. “How many vampire nests did we clean out on that tri
p to Vegas?”

  Roland shot me a sly grin. “When the pack heard you were coming for a few days, a couple of them went to visit family out of town.”

  I rolled my eyes at them. “Funny, guys. And to answer your question, Jordan, I loved it here. We used to find plenty of things to keep us occupied when we were kids. I don’t think I was ever bored.”

  Roland grinned. “If our parents knew half the stuff we used to get into...” He leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “Is Nate moving back now that it’s safe?”

  “I think there are too many bad memories here for him to ever come back.” The last time Nate had been in this apartment, he was a vampire. He was still trying to forget that part of his life.

  “What’s he going to do with the place if he doesn’t come back?” Peter asked.

  “He was talking about selling it, so Nikolas bought it for me.” I turned my head to smile at Nikolas, and he leaned in for a quick kiss.

  Jordan snorted. “Yeah, they’re like that all the time now since they mated.”

  She and I shared a secret smile. Jordan had been positively giddy when I told her that Nikolas and I had finally completed the bond. She’d tried to pry the details out of me, but some things are just too intimate to share, even with your best female friend. I’d given her the “when” and “where” but that was pretty much it. She’d replied that the dreamy look on my face told her all she needed to know. Plus, we were talking about Nikolas.

  “So I guess that means we’ll be seeing more of you guys,” Roland said hopefully.

  “Until we leave for our trip,” Nikolas told him.

  “In June we’re going to spend the summer in Russia.” I couldn’t keep the excitement out of my voice. Nikolas had told me so much about his homeland that I couldn’t wait to explore it with him. I was nervous about meeting his parents, but eager to learn more about his early life. I’d already spoken to his mother on the phone, and she was as excited as I was for our visit.

  Chris’s lips twitched. “Perhaps we should tell Miroslav Fortress to be on alert this summer.”