by LeAnn Ashers
The water is clearing my head a little and giving me a second to think about what happened. Someone from my past has obviously found me and, by God’s grace, I wasn't there. I was here with Smiley.
I haven’t known him very long, but I know deep down that I can trust him. It’s hard to wrap my head around the thought of being his, that I am in a relationship. A relationship with a man as amazing as Smiley.
He promised to protect me. I believe him and, honestly, I do feel safe with him. But I am going to have to tell him what happened.
There is a huge possibility that he will turn away from me after this. What man in his right mind would want someone in this situation? No matter how much I want to be in his life, he deserves the truth—even if it means that I end up alone.
Closing my eyes for a few seconds, I relax and try not to panic. Nobody but Alisha knows the full extent of my life, and I am afraid to tell anyone what happened because I feel embarrassed and ashamed. I quickly finish my shower and get dressed. My hand on the doorknob, I brace myself for what’s to come.
When I open the door, Smiley is sitting on the bed resting against the headboard. The TV gives the bedroom a slight glow. As I settle in beside him, his eyes are on me, but I can’t bring myself to look at him.
So much for having a pair, eh?
“Adeline…”
I let out a deep breath and look up at him for a second. His face is soft and concerned, but I can tell he is pissed off.
“I grew up two hours outside of Raleigh, Texas, where the criminals and drug abusers lived because there were basically no cops—unless they are called—because it was so rural.” I close my eyes. “My parents weren’t present and I just lived there. We would go months without talking, but the day I turned eighteen they threw my stuff onto the front lawn and kicked me out.”
I look at him, my heart hurting. “I had nowhere to go. There was a guy who liked me and I knew he had his own place, so I was thinking anywhere was better than being out on the streets, ya know? I was wrong.”
His face changes when I say the last part.
“The moment I set foot in that house, my life was over. He took my virginity and then I was stuck. He controlled every aspect of my life.” I rub my eyes, trying to stop the tears from rolling down my face. “I would try to leave, but being so far out in the middle of nowhere, I had no place to go. He became abusive. I was beaten every single day of my life, and I was his to do whatever he wanted to with. I was locked inside the house. He put a lock on the outside of the door.”
Smiley pulls me closer to him. I could tell that he was struggling over whether to touch me or not. But I so needed that.
“I became pregnant with Alisha, and that was my worst fear. I had never wanted to have a kid in that situation, but I never had a say in the matter.”
I watch his face transform as he gets my meaning: my boyfriend raped me every single day, and that was the easy part of my life.
“When Alisha was about six years old, he started to be mean to her, and by that time I had saved up a little bit of money that I’d managed to steal. But he came home early as I was about to leave.”
I sniff, tears falling. “He shot me up with so many drugs that I would lose days, and the moment I would come down from my high, he would add more and more until the years blended together. But I remember some things. He used me as a prostitute. I remember not being able to move my body… I would just see these men raping me over and over.” I sob, unable to contain myself.
“I couldn’t scream, move, or do anything. I was helpless. They would hurt me in every way possible. My body is a scarred mess. I will never be able to have children again, but at least I am completely disease-free. That is the only blessing in all this besides Alisha.
“My biggest regret is that Alisha suffered in that house, and I couldn’t do a thing to help her. I was lifeless. I was severely malnourished and most of my teeth were gone. I had to have implants done.
“Someone from my past must have found me.” My voice cracks and I am afraid to look at him. I don’t want to see the disgust on his face.
“Baby.” His voice is rough and his lips touch my forehead. “I am so fucking sorry that happened to you. I will kill every single one of those fuckers that hurt you. This does not change the way that I look at you, baby. You’re the strongest woman I have ever met.”
The weight of the world falls from my shoulders in a split second. His seeing me differently was my biggest fear. “I was so scared to tell you. I was scared of the way you would see me and that you would be disgusted.”
He shakes his head. “I will never be fucking ashamed of you, sweet girl. This shit doesn't define you. Like I fucking said, you’re my woman and I will never fucking abandon you.”
That does me in; I didn’t know how much I needed to hear this. It’s like I can breathe for the first time in a long time. He lifts me onto his lap and holds me. He holds me together while I feel like I am shattering. “You will never be alone again, sweet girl,” he whispers into my ear.
“Thank you so much, Smiley,” I whisper, clutching the front of his shirt. “You make me feel safe.”
“You are safe with me, baby.” He rocks side to side, soothing me.
Smiley
They are dead. Every single fucker that touched her is dead. The sight of her fucking afraid that I will be disgusted with her will haunt me forever.
I slip my hand under her sleeve and feel something rough and lumpy. She stiffens. “Can I, baby?” I ask her, making sure she is okay. She nods and I lift up the back of her shirt.
Fuck.
Her entire back is covered in scars; it looks like she was whipped. She has been through so fucking much I am not sure how she can smile and go about her day like nothing happened.
She is so fucking strong, and I want to take care of her. I never want her to feel another ounce of pain. I want her to be fucking happy because she went so long without that. I want to shelter her from everything, and I fucking will.
Starting with the guys that hurt her.
Later That Night
Our tech guy sent me the details earlier today, giving me all the info I need. It’s around eight o’clock at night, and she is lying with her head on my stomach.
I can tell the difference in her already. It’s like a huge burden has been lifted off her shoulders.
I get a text from our tech guy: I got them.
I smile. It’s fucking showtime. “Baby, do you care if I run to the club? I have a meeting, and I am sending over some prospects to sit outside your gates.”
She shakes her head, pulling the blanket tightly around her. “I feel safe here. I will be okay.”
As I kiss the top of her head, her eyes close. Soon she will be able to shut her eyes without the fear of those fuckers coming after her.
When I get to the club, I go straight into the meeting room, where I know everyone is waiting for me. My son, Lane, is sitting at the head of the table. I shut the door and everyone stares at me, waiting for what I have to say.
“You all know Techy’s woman, Alisha. Alisha’s mom, Adeline, is my woman.” She is family to the Devil Souls.” Everyone nods. “I was taking her home, and her whole apartment was destroyed. Some fucker pissed on and tore up every single article of clothing she had and destroyed her bed.” I don’t want everybody to know all the details, but they need to know why I fucking have to kill all of these people and give my woman her life back. I won’t let it fucking settle, with her being afraid. She doesn’t need that. Her life has been hell, and that is going to end.
I look at my brothers. At the end of the table are my original brothers: Konrad, Maverick, and Walker. They were there in the beginning, and we made this club. Looking around the table, I see our kids and their brothers. It has grown into a fucking empire.
“Adeline was in a domestic situation for fucking years with her ex. I won’t go into details, but these men that came back fo
r her today did horrible, unthinkable things to her, and they said she owes them.”
Their faces harden. One thing I do know about my brothers: this won’t change their perception of Adeline. She probably won’t even know I told them.
Adeline is fucking strong, and that is what everyone sees. I look to our tech guy, Matthew. “I have the information on the guy that broke into her house,” he says.
I smile as he reads off the address. “Let’s ride.”
Lane and I ride in front of the formation with the brothers at my back. I am so fucking angry thinking about facing the man who broke into her house. I have never been so mad in my life.
This man is just a pawn of the guy who runs the fucking show. I am going to be picking them all off.
One by one.
Little by little.
Until I get to the main man. By then he will fucking know that I am coming for him, but it won’t happen fucking fast. I am going to play with him, be in the places he goes. Eat across the room from him in a fucking restaurant. I am going to fucking make him suffer. I want him to be scared and walking on fucking eggshells waiting for me. Then when he least expects it, I am going to end him and, oh, it won’t be an easy death. It’s going to drawn out; he is going to know the same fucking pain she felt as her back was broken open as she was whipped. It’s going to be as excruciating as the mental pain he caused her.
My biggest disappointment is her bastard of an ex isn’t alive.
After driving for an hour, we arrive in the town Alisha and Adeline are from. I can see the moment we arrive that it’s a fucked-up place. People are selling shit in plain view, and prostitutes are all but chasing down our bikes, trying to get our attention.
We are doing this for a reason; we are making a scene. The Grim Sinners are here and ready to fuck shit up.
I spot the trailer the guy is supposed to be living in, and I see someone run inside. I smile. This is going to be so much fun. We pull to a stop in front of his house, taking up the entire road, not letting anyone in or out.
As we dismount from our bikes, I look at Lane. “We have your back, Dad,” he says. “Do what you need to do.” My son has just found his woman and gone through some similar shit. It wasn’t as serious as what happened to Adeline, but it was enough to stir up some shit.
I walk to the front door, and some other brothers are surrounding the house to make sure he doesn’t run out the back or jump out a window. He is fucking trapped.
I step onto the ratty porch and kick the fucking door in. It comes completely off its hinges and hits the floor. The guy runs toward the back of the house. I point my gun in his direction. “If you run, I will blow your fucking brains out.”
He stops instantly and turns around to face me, and I smile. His eyes widen at the sight of my cut.
That’s right, motherfucker. I watch as it sinks in who we are.
“What do you want?” His voice is shaking so hard that I can barely understand him.
“It seems that you paid my woman’s house a visit.”
He falls right on his fucking ass once he gets it through his head: the magnitude of what he has done and the consequences of his actions. The highest offense you can commit in this club is to mess with a member’s ole lady, or someone related to the club. It’s unforgivable.
“Let’s not forget she is the mother of an ole lady of a member of the Devil Souls MC.”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, I am so dead!” His shrill fucking voice is killing me. Pussy. A pussy that goes around destroying women’s homes and clothes, leaving them with nothing. I stand over him and press my gun to the top of his head. He clenches his eyes closed, the stench of piss hitting me.
“I want to ask you one fucking time, and this will determine if you die quickly or slowly. If you like, I will torture the information out of you.”
He nods his head quickly, and I bend down right in front of his fucking face. “Did you ever touch her?”
His face pales, giving me the answer that I needed, but I want to hear it from his fucking mouth.
His mouth opens and closes. “I… I…”
I press the gun harder against his face. “Do not fucking lie.”
“I did.”
Behind me, Lane cusses.
“How many times?”
He covers his face. “I don’t know, whenever I had the money and whenever he could safely drug her without killing her.”
My heart fucking shatters in my chest.
He stands up.
“Open your eyes,” I tell him.
He looks at me, and I point my gun at his dick; then I pull the trigger three times. A man who can hurt a woman like that doesn’t get to die easily.
He falls to his side holding his dick, what’s left of it. He will bleed out and die within an hour. This will give him some time to think about his actions.
I walk out of the trailer, leaving him lying there, and the brothers file out behind me. A hand touches my shoulder. “Dad, this is the first time you haven’t smiled,” Lane says.
I don’t say anything; I have never been this angry before.
This is different.
Adeline
The Next Morning
When I open my eyes, the first thing I see is Smiley asleep next to me, his arm thrown across my stomach. I smile at how beautiful he looks and how peaceful he is. Years have been taken off of him. I just want to hug him and never let go. Then it hits me. I didn’t have any nightmares last night. I cover my mouth to stifle my laughter. I can’t believe that for the first time in a long time—probably months—I didn’t wake up terrified in the middle of the night.
“You okay?” His voice, deep from sleep, sends shivers down my body. I look at him, feeling light as air.
“I never had any nightmares last night, I haven’t been dream-free in so long.”
His hand touches my cheek. “Fucking happy, baby.” He traces my cheekbone and lip with his thumb; then his fingers sink into my hair. Goose bumps break out across my skin; it’s like I’m floating. No one has ever looked at me this way before. It’s like I actually mean something to him.
I actually have a chance to be with someone.
I am not sure how I was blessed enough to experience all of this with him. “You’re so good to me.” I kiss his cheek and snuggle against him, his arm around me, my head at the crook of his neck. He wraps his arms around me tightly. He is so warm and I could stay here forever. “Where is one place you always wanted to go?” he asks me.
I stay silent, thinking. “I have always wanted to go on vacation to a beach.” That is what I promised Alisha before everything happened. That was my dream. I wanted to have a house on the beach where I could sit and watch the ocean while my daughter played in the sand.
His body shifts beside me, and he starts texting. A minute or so later, his phone beeps. “Our plane for Hawaii leaves tomorrow morning.”
I gasp loudly, sit up, and look at him in pure disbelief. “Are you kidding me?” I can’t wrap my head around what he just said.
He grins. “Baby, we are going on vacation.”
I cover my mouth, because I cannot believe this.
“Smiley…” I have no clue what to say to him, because I can’t believe someone would do something like this for me. He is just perfect. “You didn’t have to do this.”
“I wanted to, sweet girl. Now today let’s go get you new stuff.” He sits up and kisses me; then he slips off the bed, taking me with him. “I had a prospect bring some clothes for you this morning.” He motions to a stack of clothing on the foot of the bed.
I just can’t with this guy right now; he is so amazing and beyond thoughtful. “Smiley, I don’t know what to say—” I start but he shakes his head, not wanting my thanks.
I take the clothes off the bed, split the distance from Smiley, and kiss him noisily on the cheeks. “Thank you, baby.”
He smiles widely at me, his eyes lighting up. I smile
back at him, looking over my shoulder as I walk to the bathroom. I shut the door and lean against it, clutching my clothes to my chest like it’s my lifeline.
Oh boy.
We arrive at the mall a couple of hours later, after getting some breakfast. He goes straight to the front, his hand protectively on the small of my back.
This is my favorite place to shop; I am not sure how he knew this. “My woman here is in need of a whole new wardrobe—don’t worry about the price—and she needs a couple of bathing suits and other stuff for our vacation.”
Wait, did he just say that? “Smiley—” He kisses me, stopping me from saying another word.
Two of the ladies who work here come around the counter to me. “It seems like we have a bunch of work to do,” one of them tells me, taking my hands and tearing me away from Smiley. I glare at him over my shoulder, pretending to be angry.
He laughs and leans back against the counter, watching me get dragged away. The ladies set me down on a couch inside one of the changing rooms and put a glass of wine in my hand. “Relax and we will bring things to you. Do you know your size?”
Smiley is outside the door telling them my exact measurements. What the heck? The ladies leave and I sit here, dumbfounded because of everything that is Smiley. It’s absolutely wild that he knows all of this about me.
Smiley strolls into the women’s dressing rooms. He lifts me off the small couch, setting me in his lap. I laugh. “How did you know my size?”
He rubs my legs, and I feel his breath against my ear. “I know my woman, baby.” A shiver runs all the way down my body. He is trying to kill me, that is 100 percent for certain.
A bit later, the ladies start showing up with outfits and, much to my surprise, Smiley has an opinion on everything. I try on the things I like, and Smiley takes them from me so I can’t put them back on the rack. He knows I don’t want him to spend that much on me.