American Dreamer

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American Dreamer Page 26

by Shawn Wesley Ballenger


  “Chan?” He wrinkled his brow. “You’re—you’re…my dad?”

  “I am.” Channing gave him a gentle smile.

  “Oh, my God!” Cam threw his arms Channing and pulled him down, holding him as if he never wanted to let him go. “Oh, my God! Dad! You didn’t die!” He sobbed.

  Channing’s tears burst from his eyes as he began weeping. “Yeah, buddy, I’m alive.”

  “I can’t believe it’s really you.” Cam squeezed him until Channing thought he was going to pass out from lack of breath. I’ve missed you so much, Dad.” Cam bawled.

  “I know, buddy.” Channing wept.

  After several minutes, Cam pushed Channing up, not taking his hands off his shoulders, as if he might disappear again. Channing wiped his tears on his sleeve and managed a weak smiled.

  “Chan!” He stared at Channing. “You’re my Dad!” Cam struggled with the idea that his closest friend had been his ‘dead’ father the entire time. “But…but…you’re a kid!” He sputtered

  “I know.” Channing looked down at himself.

  “How? Did you…choose this?” Cam asked, not knowing exactly where to start.

  “Yeah, buddy. I did. The night before Brandon Daniels disappeared, He,” He looked at his son with pain in his eyes, “I mean I…I was moments away from killing myself.” He attempted to mentally reconnect to the persona he left behind so many months ago.

  “Oh, God. Dad.” Cam began crying again. “Why?”

  “I hated my life, Cam. You hated me, your mother hated me, and I hated my job, my father, and most of all, I hated myself. Brandon Daniels’ life was one big lie. What I wrote in my suicide letter was true. You’re the only good thing that came out of my life as Brandon Daniels.”

  “Dad,” Cam shook his head, “I never hated you. I just wanted you to be the dad you used to be.” Cam sobbed.

  “I was so miserable, son, I couldn’t find that person anymore. I was lost, buddy.” He looked down. “But I found myself again.”

  Cam nodded through his tears; he understood.

  “Your Uncle Tommy saved me. He gave up a long life for me to have this one because he loved me, and now he’s my dad. I finally understand what having a loving father really feels like.” Channing smiled through his tears. “And I’m so sorry I wasn’t that kind of father to you those last few years, Cam. You’re the best son a father could have asked for, and I’m so thankful for the past four months I’ve gotten to know you and be your friend. I want you to know that I’ll always love you, and I’ll always be here for you.” He leaned forward and wrapped his arms around his son again, and they held each other.

  “I love you so much, Dad.” Cam wept.

  A short while later, Cam and Channing sat across one another at the kitchen table. Cam picked up his grilled cheese sandwich and took a bite.

  “Mmm…you’re definitely my dad because no one could ever make grilled cheese sandwiches like you. Man, I missed these.” Cam took a bite as the gooey melted American cheese oozed from between the slices of grilled bread, dripping to his plate.

  “You always loved my grilled cheese sandwiches. I remember your first day of kindergarten, and I had to get up early to make you one to put in your lunchbox.” Channing picked up his own sandwich from his plate and smiled.

  Cam swallowed and sat his sandwich back down on his plate, and stared at Channing shaking his head. “You’re Chan, yet you’re my dad. I can’t wrap my head around it.”

  Channing laughed like a kid as he took a sip of his Coke. “Pretty cool, huh?”

  “But you’re so young.” Cam stared at his father’s boyish features.

  “Yeah, well, that’s Dad’s…I mean…Tommy’s fault. His measurements were a bit off.” Channing pinched his thumb and index finger together. “I was supposed to be your age, where I could get to know you and be your friend. Maybe graduate and go to college together.” He shrugged. “But, being fourteen isn’t so bad.” He looked down at himself. “Being a late-bloomer is kinda embarrassing sometimes.”

  “Glad I didn’t inherit that gene.” Cam laughed and rubbed his five o’clock shadow. “Oh, shit, Dad! I just realized I was right about you! You were gay!”

  Channing nodded. “Yeah, buddy, you nailed that one, even the part about me being so miserable I couldn’t be myself.” He shrugged. “I blame a lot of that on your Grandpa Daniels because I never had the balls to stand up to that man.”

  “I told him to go fuck himself at your funeral,” Cam said as he sipped his Coke.

  “What?” Channing’s eyes grew wide, and his voice cracked.

  “He started talking shit about you being weak and a coward, and I had enough of it, so I told him that he could go fuck himself.” Cam shook his head. “I never liked that bastard. I saw how he treated you. He is a manipulative liar. He plays people, and…well, he's not going to play me. And as far as wanting me to invest my money in his fucking investment schemes, well…I told him he could go to Hell.”

  “Good for you, Cam! I wish I would have had the courage to tell him that years ago. I’m so proud of you!” Channing felt as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, knowing that Cam would never be manipulated by his grandfather.

  Cam’s eyes got big again, and he suddenly came to another realization. “You and Logan?”

  “Umm,” Channing blushed, “yeah. I…um…about that. I wasn’t looking for that to happen. It just did. I hope you’re not mad at me?”

  Cam remained silent and looked away. Channing could see the wheels of his son’s mind turning as he tried to wrap his head around the one thing that he was afraid he would not accept.

  Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Cam turned to him, his face relaxed.

  “I guess I’m okay with it.” He shrugged. “I mean, you’ve got a whole new life. After getting to know Chan, it’s hard for me to see you as the same person that was my father. I mean, all I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy, Dad. And if Logan makes you happy, I’m good with it.”

  “Thanks, Cam.” Channing breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Besides, Logan is crazy about you. I’ve never seen him act this lovesick over a girl.” Cam looked down. “Just don’t ever tell him who you really are, okay? I mean, it would really freak him out.”

  “No way!” Channing shook his head, adamantly. “No one can ever find out. You, Tommy, Kathy, and Corbin are the only ones that know.”

  “Corbin knows?” Cam raised his voice.

  “He figured it out like the second day of school. I got too excited in our discussion of Doctor Who, and I let slip some comments that I had said to him before as Brandon Daniels.” Channing brushed the bread crumbs off his shirt.

  “I can actually see that happening when it comes to you and Doctor Who.” Cam chuckled, knowing about his father’s total obsession with the show. “I bet you were glad I gave you your DVD collection back.”

  “Absolutely!” Channing smiled.

  Cam cocked his head to the side, looking at him suspiciously. “Did you have anything to do with Lance leaving?”

  A big smile appeared on Channing’s face as he started to take a bit of his sandwich.

  “You did!” Cam shouted. “What did you do?” He laughed.

  Channing put his sandwich back on his plate. “I demonstrated to him my ‘power’ by turning an adult mouse into a baby and told Lance if he didn’t leave, I was going to do the same to him.” He laughed. “I convinced him I was a master of the Dark Arts.” Channing wiggled his fingers in a spooky gesture.

  Cam burst out laughing.

  “He pissed his pants,” Channing added. “It was classic, dude!”

  “Oh, man! I wish I had seen that!” Cam rolled.

  “I just want you to be happy, Cam,” Channing said. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted. That, and for us to be father and son again.”

  Cam’s eyes gleamed. “I want that, too, Dad.”

  Channing watched as Cam stood up, walked over, and put his arms arou
nd him.

  “I’m so glad to have you back, Dad.” He squeezed him, glancing towards the window and catching a glimpse of the neighbor’s flashing Christmas lights. “You know what, Dad? I got my wish!” His eyes swam with tears.

  Channing followed his eyes to the Santa waving happily from the neighbor’s roof. “I did, too, son. I did, too.”

  Epilogue

  10 Months Later

  “Are you sure you’re okay, buddy?” Corbin asked Channing as they pushed their mowers down the street to their third yard of the weekend so far.

  Although it was October, the yards in Phoenix continued to require servicing.

  “Yeah, dude. I told you I’m fine. It was a mutual decision. There aren’t any hard feelings between us. We’re still good friends.” Channing replied, thinking back to the previous weekend when Logan finally told him he wanted to see other people.

  Cam and Logan had both decided to follow in the footsteps of Channing and Tommy as best friends attending the University of Arizona together.

  “But you guys were together for almost a year,” Corbin said, sympathetically.

  “I know, but come on, Corb. It was going to happen sooner or later. He’s a college freshman, and I’m a sophomore in high school. He’s busy, I’m busy. We saw each other maybe once every two weeks. It was becoming impossible for us to get together. Mom and Dad won’t let me drive two hours to Tucson with only my permit to see him, and I don’t want them tagging along.”

  “True.” Corb shrugged. “Speaking of driving, when am I gonna get another go behind the wheel of your new Corvette?” He winked as a car whizzed by.

  Channing laughed. “Dude, you just drove it two days ago!” He thought back to the previous Thursday evening when he let Corbin drive him, Kathy, and Tommy to the new Chinese place downtown in his birthday present from Cam. “Besides, Dad is not too excited to ride with you again after you nearly hit that car.”

  “Dude. That wasn’t my fault. That car pulled in front of me!” Corbin pointed to himself.

  “You were checking out those girls on the side of the road, and weren’t paying attention!” Channing raised his voice, remembering the two fit blondes in the short mini-skirts that had Corbin drooling.

  “I know, dude, but that car is so sweet! I can’t wait until we get to cruise around town on a Saturday night in that.” Corbin looked to the sky dreamily. “Chicks will flock to us. Well, dudes for you.” He grinned.

  “Thanks.” Channing rolled his eyes. “Oh, by the way, you looked really hot in those black jeans you wore to school yesterday. They really make your butt look good.” He complimented.

  “You think so?” Corbin put his hand on his behind and looked back over his shoulder, having grown used to Channing going all ‘Queer Eye’ on him now that he finally had fashion sense.

  “I tell ya’, Dude. Your legs and ass are your best features. You need to wear clothes that show them off. Those are what’s gonna get you the girls.” Channing said, recognizing his best friend was already a babe magnet.

  “Thanks, man.” Corbin turned his head and gave him a smile.

  “Oh!” Channing changed the subject. “Cam told me the other day that Marcia has moved into the Ellington Apartments over on Fifth Street.”

  “No way!” Corbin stopped and turned to him. “That place is a dump!”

  Channing thought about the reputation of the apartments being a hang-out for local prostitutes and drug dealers. He tried to feel sorry for Channing Daniel’s ex-wife, but he found it difficult, especially after the way she verbally—and as Cam later admitted to him—physically abused him for years. All this happened a few weeks after his former employer paid the life insurance policy to Cam when the Change of Beneficiary forms signed weeks before Channing’s death showed up in the company’s e-mail. Of course, this didn’t stop Marcia from calling her son up and begging for money, much to Channing’s chagrin.

  “Yeah. Serves her right, though, after what she did to Cam.” Channing answered as he scratched his bare chest and noticed they had stopped in front of Brandon Daniel’s former home.

  He turned and frowned at the house.

  “Amen to that.” Corbin agreed before following Channing’s eyes. “Sorry, dude. Didn’t notice we stopped here.”

  “Nah. It’s okay.” Channing replied. “I’m over it.”

  About that time, a teenage boy stepped out from behind the hedges close to the house with a pair of hedge clippers in hand. Channing watched as the boy with the dark skin and dreads, wearing just a pair of white Adidas shorts and a pair of old white Nike’s, kicked the fresh-cut limbs out of his way before turning his head towards him and Corbin. A big grin appeared on the teen’s face. Channing’s mouth went dry as the teen dropped his clippers and started walking towards them.

  “Oh, shit, he’s coming over.” Channing began to panic.

  Corbin looked at his best friend. “Dude. Chill.” He laughed.

  “Just act ‘normal.’” Channing said he pushed back his now shoulder-length brown hair back and gave his best smile as the shirtless teen approached.

  “What’s up?” The teen jerked his head up in a casual greeting. “Name’s Theo.” His eyes went directly to Channing’s bare chest.

  “I’m Corbin, and this is Channing.” Corbin introduced them.

  Channing smiled, unable to speak, his eyes focused on the teen’s muscular pecs and a six-pack of abs.

  God, he’s cute. Channing thought to himself as seconds clicked by, and he watched the boy wipe the sweat from his forehead.

  “Hi.” Channing finally spoke, sounding a little too high-pitched. “I’m Channing.”

  “Dude.” Corbin turned to Channing. “I just told him your name.”

  “Oh…right.” Channing forced a nervous laugh as he felt his knees grow weak and leaned not-so-casually against his mower’s handle. His eyes bulged when he realized the mower had started rolling out from under him, causing him to fall backward.

  “What’s wrong with you, dude?” Corbin watched as his best friend tried to catch himself before falling to the ground and landing flat on his butt.

  “Nothing.” Channing scowled at Corbin, flung his hair from his face, stood up, and turned his attention back to Theo’s beautiful brown eyes.

  “You live here?” Corbin asked, nodding towards Channing’s old house. “I haven’t seen you at school.”

  “Yeah, man.” Theo chuckled at Channing as he pulled himself up. “I’m a sophomore at St. Francis Academy.”

  “Ooh, the rich kid school.” Corbin smiled. “No wonder I haven’t seen you.”

  “I don’t know about that.” Theo laughed, his eyes shooting to Channing’s bare chest again as he brushed the grass off the back of his shorts.

  “We’re both sophomores at Franklin High.” Channing said, tucking his hair behind his ears.

  “Cool, man.” Theo checked out Channing’s chest a third time, lifted his eyes, and gave him a flirtatious wink.

  Channing’s face lit up, feeling another body part responding as well.

  A few moments of silence passed before Theo spoke.

  “You guys look like you could use a cold drink. Wanna come inside?” Theo pointed over his shoulder towards his house.

  “Definitely,” Channing said without a second thought.

  Corbin finally picked up on why Channing was behaving like a love-struck teenage girl and gave him a knowing grin.

  As Corbin and Channing followed Theo into Brandon Daniels’ old house, Channing glanced up at the sky. I love my life!

  The End.

  About the Author

  Shawn Wesley Ballenger is an Arkansas native. When not writing, he enjoys collecting records, restoring old electronics, hiking, and geeking out over classic Doctor Who. A proud nerd since 1983.

  You can connect with Shawn on Twitter and via e-mail.

  Twitter: @revolvertwo

  E-mail: mailto:[email protected]

  bsp;

  Shawn Wesley Ballenger, American Dreamer

 

 

 


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