Heart of Hope: Books 1-4

by Williams, Ajme

  I laughed. “Yes.”

  “Andrew, come sit down until we’re in the air, okay?” Serena said following him up the aisle. She looked into the room.

  “More adult activity can be done there,” I whispered in her ear. “Are you in the mile high club?”

  Again her cheeks flushed. “No.”

  I waggled my brows. “I’ll add it to my list.” It was probably perverse how much I enjoyed initiating her into sexual escapades.

  We buckled Andrew into a seat where he could look out the window. Serena and I sat on the couch that ran along the length of the main cabin area.

  “I guess this is nothing but a thing, for you,” she said, taking in the leather seats.

  “I’ve been fortunate in my life financially.”

  She turned to look at me. “But it sometimes is a weight?”

  I smiled as I gently tugged on a tendril of her hair. “The money isn’t. The way people act because of it is. Expectations from my family. People who see dollar signs instead of Devin.”

  She pressed a hand to my cheek. “I see Devin.”

  “I know.” I pulled her hand to my chest. “That’s the real fortune.”

  She sighed, and while she looked happy, there was something in her eyes that I could only describe as concern. Was she afraid to fly? Was she worried about me not treating Andrew right? Maybe she was concerned about my family, which admittedly, was a legitimate concern. While my mother had backed off on pushing me to marry Evie, I had no doubt she wouldn’t be happy about my bringing Serena home. Dealing with Serena’s father was a piece of cake compared to what my mother might do.

  So far, my plan had been to keep my mother out of my personal relationships, but if this thing between Serena and I progressed, I needed to prepare them both. Especially with Andrew now involved.

  With the plane ready and doors locked, we headed out to the runway and soon the wheels lifted and we were airborne.

  When I first met Serena, my life was one endless bore of a day after another. With her, I’d been able to see the world with new eyes. I’d been able to have new experiences. The same was turning out to be true being around Andrew.

  How many times had I been on this plane? I arrived back from Europe on it on Friday. To me, it was a mode of transportation. But watching Andrew, his eyes wide, bouncing in his seat, laughing with such joy, I knew I’d been spoiled and jaded.

  “I don’t know that I’ve ever seen him this happy and excited,” Serena said. She was smiling because her kid was happy. I vowed to do as much as I could to make them both happy.

  Less than an hour later, we were coming in for a landing.

  “Is that the Washington Monument,” Serena asked looking out the window.

  “It is.”

  She whipped her head to me. “We’re in Washington, D.C.?”

  “Yes.”

  “What’s Washington, D.C.?” Andrew asked from his perch by the window.

  “It’s where the president lives,” Serena said.

  “Are we going to see the president?” Andrew looked at me with wide-eyed awe.

  “No. We’re going to see something better.”

  I had a car waiting which took us over the Potomac and to Jefferson Drive.

  “Where are we?” Andrew asked as I ushered us out of the car.

  “Andrew. Welcome to the National Air and Space Museum.”

  “Oh God, Devin…” Serena looked at the building and then at me. For a moment I thought I saw love in her eyes. My heart clenched in my chest as I realized I wanted that. “I can’t believe you did this.”

  “What is it?” Andrew asked, grabbing my hand and jumping up and down.

  I squatted down. “This museum has planes and rockets and all things that fly in the air and in outer space.”

  Andrew’s mouth and eyes rounded like saucers. “Really?”

  “Really. We’re going to see it all.” I took his hand and put my arm around Serena taking them to the entrance of the museum. They weren’t mine. Not really. But I felt like they were. I definitely wanted them to be.

  The minute we walked in, Andrew’s mouth was agape. Planes and jets hung from the ceiling. There were space vehicles and moon rocks. There were old planes and new ones. There was a space shuttle. We took it all in, even the movies.

  I took them to dinner at a Roarke owned restaurant in Georgetown, of course, and by the time we arrived back at the airport, Andrew was sound asleep. I put him back in the bedroom, feeling bad he’d probably sleep through that. Still, I felt like fucking Superman the way that kid looked at me. Serena too.

  I got us both a glass of wine and sat with her on the couch for the flight back to New York.

  “Today was amazing, Devin. Thank you. He’ll never forget this.”

  “I was happy to do it. Really. To see all that through his eyes…” I couldn’t completely express what I was feeling.

  She looked at me and it seemed like she wanted to say something.

  “What?” I prodded.

  She shook her head. “I’m just overwhelmed by it all. By you.”

  I grinned. “In a good way, right?”

  “Right.” She leaned forward and kissed me. Again, it felt like there was something unsettling in the kiss. Not that she was pulling away like before, but a wall still existed. “You’re an amazing man.” She said when she pulled away.

  I studied her, wishing I could read her mind. “You’re amazing too.”

  She looked down like she didn’t believe it. Finally, she looked at me. “When we get back, my parents said they’d take Andrew for the night.”

  I wasn’t sure if it was the right response, but my dick perked up at that. “Oh?”

  “We can have some time just the two of us.”

  Now I was confused because it seemed like that meant sex, and yet, her expression had that same worry.

  “Will you tell me what’s going on with you?”

  Her head snapped up at me like she was surprised that I could tell. “Yes.”

  “Good. Will we be able to make love too?”

  She bit her lip. “I hope so.”

  When we dropped Andrew off with her parents, they had a similar expression as Serena and I couldn’t help but feel like a shoe was about to drop. I wasn’t ready for that, so when we got to her apartment, I pressed her body against the door and kissed her hard.

  “I want you Serena.”

  “We need to talk—”

  “Sex first. Talk later.”

  She looked at me with those pretty blue eyes that held sadness. What the fuck was wrong? But she nodded, and took my hand to lead me to her room. She kissed me, and everything else left my brain except her and my need to touch her, to be inside her.

  It seemed like forever until we were naked, but finally, my hands and lips were on her soft skin. I feasted on her nipples, savoring the sounds she made as I sucked and nipped at them.

  “Fuck me, Devin, I need you inside me.”

  Her voice sounded desperate and I wanted to give her what she needed, while at the same time, I wanted to take this thing as slow as possible. I couldn’t help but feel dread at whatever the hell she needed to talk to me about, so I wanted to put it off as long as possible.

  “I’m going to make you come, baby,” I said as I made my way down her body to her sweet pussy.

  “I want your dick,” she gasped as I licked her clit.

  “You will, baby. You will.” I didn’t give her the opportunity to talk more as I dove into her pussy. I licked and sucked. I thrust my tongue inside her, sweeping it around her sweet pussy walls. She arched and writhed on the bed as I drove her higher and higher.

  “Devin!” she screamed my name and her sweet juice coated my mouth as her orgasm overtook her. I continued to lick and lave, bringing her down.

  I reached for the condom packet worried I’d come when I rolled it on, I was so fucking hard.

  She put her hand over mine. “You don’t need that.”

  My br
ain wasn’t fully functioning so I just stared at her.

  “I’m on the pill. I have been for years. It keeps me regular.”

  I had no clue what that meant, but I didn’t care. Fuck, at this point, I’m not sure I cared if she was on it or not. To fuck her without a barrier? The idea of it made my brain short-circuit.

  “I’m clean,” I managed. “Safe. Healthy.”

  She smiled. “Me too.”

  I positioned myself over her. I stared down into her eyes, and emotion swelled in my chest like I’d never felt before.

  “I think I’m in love with you, Serena.”

  She gasped, and her eyes filled with tears. I hoped to hell they were happy ones.

  “Show me.” She said, as her hands gripped my ass and pulled me to her. “Make love to me.”

  I pressed the tip of my dick into her pussy, and just that little contact felt like I’d gone to heaven. She was soft and wet, and as I pushed in, I swore I could feel every inch of her.

  “I’m not going to last,” I said as I reached the limit.

  “I want to feel you come in me.”

  I groaned as her words send erotic shots of electricity straight to my dick. I moved, wanting to keep things slow and steady to ensure she’d come again. But almost immediately the pressure shot up and my dick was ready to explode.

  “Fuck, Serena…are you close, baby?”

  “Yes. Devin, don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.”

  I kissed her hard, wanting contact with every bit of her body as my hips bucked in and out, up and down, harder, faster.

  She cried out, arching underneath me. Her pussy gripped my cock so hard, stars burst behind my eyes.

  A long feral growl tore from my chest as my orgasm ripped through my body. “Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck…” I chanted like a loon as I pumped and pumped, releasing load after load, filling her pussy.

  I collapsed on her, even as my cock continued to pulse inside her. I held her close knowing that she had something to tell me and praying that whatever the hell she had to say wasn’t going to ruin this, ruin us.

  21

  Serena

  The day was perfect. The man was perfect. Had I played my cards right, life might have been perfect. But I didn’t play them right, and now I was likely to lose the only man I’d ever loved.

  I was supposed to be telling him about Andrew, but instead, I let him talk me into sex. It was wrong, and yet, I had to feel his touch one more time. I had to feel him moving inside me one last time.

  I think I’m in love with you, Serena.

  I’d wanted to hear those words for forever and yet when I did, they were bittersweet. When I told him the truth, his feelings would change. Was that why I hadn’t said them back?

  “Devin?”

  His body was heaving over mine, and I wished I could hold them there forever.

  “Hmm?” He rolled to his side, but pulled me close.

  “I think I love you too…actually…I’m pretty sure of it.”

  He kissed my neck. “Me too.”

  We held each other in the dark of my apartment.

  “I need to tell you something.”

  He lifted his head to look at me.

  “When I do, please remember that I love you. No limitations.”

  His eyes showed concern, and I couldn’t blame him. My words were ominous. “No limitations.”

  “Andrew—” My words were cut off by the sound of the phone ringing.

  “Ah hell. That’s my mom. Ignore it.”

  I swallowed hard as the image his mother sending me off, warning me to never tell Devin about my baby flashed in my head.

  “It’s late. Maybe it’s important,” I said.

  “Shit, you’re right. She never calls me this late.” He swung his legs out of bed and reached down for his pants, pulling out his phone. “It’s not a good time, Mom—” He stopped short. “What? When?” He stood, and picked up his underwear and shirt. “Is it bad?”

  A worried feeling came over me. Something was wrong.

  “I’ll be there in twenty minutes.” He hung up and looked at me as he tugged his pants on. “I’m sorry. My dad fell and is in the hospital. I need to go.”

  “Yes, of course. I understand.”

  “We can have this talk later, right?”

  “Yes. Absolutely. Go check on your dad.”

  He tugged his shirt on and then leaned over the bed. “We’ll be all right.” It came out more like a question. Like he was concerned about what I had to tell him.

  I nodded, even though I wasn’t sure we’d be all right. He gave me a quick kiss and then rushed out the door. I flopped back on the bed. I hated myself for being a coward and not telling him sooner. And now I had to find a new time, a new way to tell him. This secret hung like a lead weight on me now and I was afraid I’d either never be free of it, or it would crush me.

  I wasn’t able to sleep that night. I stopped in to see Andrew quickly the next morning, but not long enough to have a discussion with my parents about what had happened, or in this case, what hadn’t happened.

  On the train to work, I texted Devin, asking him how his father was. I didn’t hear anything back, and I worried it wasn’t good. I texted him again at work, letting him know that if there was something he needed, to let me know.

  It wasn’t until I arrived back at my apartment building that I got a text back from Devin.

  He’s going to be fine, but have to make changes. Plate is full, baby, I’m sorry.

  Part of me wondered if he didn’t need my help because he didn’t want his mother to know he was seeing someone like me. Not that he was ashamed of me, but because he knew his mother wouldn’t approve. He had a lot going on with his father, his taking over the business, and having met his mother on two occasions, I suspected she was a handful now too.

  It’s fine. Let me know if I can help with something.

  I didn’t hear anything further.

  “So, how’d it go?” my mother asked when I picked up Andrew. We steeled away in the kitchen where we could talk while my father played Go Fish with Andrew.

  “I didn’t have a chance to tell him. He got a call that his dad had fallen.”

  My mother’s face pinched together like she was trying to decide if I was telling the whole truth. Which I supposed I wasn’t. I could have told him when we got back, but instead I chose to make love to him first. It didn’t seem unreasonable to want one last moment of intimacy before I blew up our lives.

  “I want to invite him for dinner again,” she said. “But he needs to know about Andrew first.”

  “He’s got a lot going on. His dad, the business…”

  “Yes, of course. Is there something we can do to help?” my mother asked.

  “I offered.”

  “Maybe you don’t offer. Show up. Help.”

  I shook my head. “I don’t think his family knows about me.”

  “What do you mean?” my father said entering the kitchen.

  “I mean he hasn’t told them. I haven’t met them.”

  “Why not?” He scowled. “He doesn’t think you’re good enough.”

  “I’m sure he does, but his family won’t.”

  “Well!” my mother said indignantly.

  “They’re snooty. I told you, Dad, she tried to pay me off. Personally, I don’t want to meet her.”

  My dad put his hands on his hips and glared at me. “The two of you aren’t good for each other.”

  “Why, because his parents are conceited? That’s not Serena’s fault,” my mother said.

  “No, because the two of you have too many secrets. If you can’t tell him about Andrew and he can’t introduce you to his parents, what sort of life can you have?”

  I sighed. I’d thought the same thing at one time. Wasn’t that why I tried to avoid him? If I didn’t see him, I wouldn’t feel compelled to tell him about Andrew. What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him, right? Of course, it was too late for that now.

  “Th
at’s why I tried to avoid him. I’m scared of how they’ll treat Andrew.”

  “They’ll treat him just fine,” my mother said confidently. “He’s a part of her son.”

  “When are you going to tell him? The longer you let that go, the worse it will be, Serena,” my father warned.

  “I know. I need to wait until he has time.”

  My father shook his head. “No, you need to push him. I know he’s got a lot on his plate, but I doubt he’ll see your holding off as being nice to him.”

  He was probably right.

  “I’ll find time this week to see him. Maybe I can arrange lunch at his office or something,” I said.

  My mother put her hands on my shoulders. “This isn’t just for Devin. It’s for Andrew too. He loves Devin. He can’t stop talking about him. He’s going to be over the moon about this.”

  Andrew and I did our regular routine that night, although my mother was right, Andrew couldn’t stop talking about Devin and his airplane flight and trip to the Air and Space Museum.

  “Do you think Devin can hang my airplane up on the ceiling like at the museum?” he asked of the toy plane Devin bought him.

  “Don’t you want to be able to play with it?” I asked, pulling his covers over him.

  “I want to have them hanging like they did there.”

  “We’ll ask him next time we see him.”

  “When will we see him?”

  I pushed Andrew’s hair out of his face, making a mental note to get him a haircut. “His daddy is sick and he needs to help his family right now.”

  “Can I make him a card?”

  “Yes, of course. Why don’t we make it tomorrow morning and I’ll try to arrange to get it to him.”

  “Okay.”

  “Give me a hug, baby. Goodnight.”

  Andrew sat up and hugged me. It occurred to me at that moment that he could be upset when he found Devin was his father and I hadn’t told him. Cripes. I really did mess things up. Inwardly I prayed they’d both forgive me.

  The next day, Andrew drew a card with an airplane for Devin that said he hoped his dad got better soon. After I dropped him off with my mother, I texted Devin asking if we could meet for lunch or coffee. Whenever it was convenient.