by Anne Rainey
“Jake, you misunderstood.” The remote tone in his voice had her scrambling to explain. “It wasn’t like that, I swear.”
“And all for a bet?” he asked, his voice rough. He pushed his cell phone back in the holder attached to his belt. “Fuck it. I should’ve guessed.”
“Guessed what?”
“That there had to be a catch.” He bent and spoke into her ear. “A real shame. I was really looking forward to kneeling for you, princess.”
Despite the gravity of the situation, Roni’s pussy flooded with liquid heat at the image his words evoked. “Damn it, Jake. Will you just listen for a second?”
He stroked her cheek with his fingers. “I think you’ve said enough.” He turned and stalked out, but not before she saw the hurt etched into the hard planes of his face.
Roni’s feet wouldn’t move. She ached to run after him, to explain. She needed to set things straight. But her damn feet wouldn’t move. Her shoulders began to shake as emotion swamped her. “What have I done?”
Lydia placed her hand at the small of her back. “Sit down, honey.”
Jeanette patted her arm. They were both talking softly, trying to soothe her. Roni heard only the anger in Jake’s voice. “Oh, God,” she moaned as she collapsed into the nearest chair. Lydia handed her a tissue and leaned against the desk, while Jeanette sat in the chair next to her.
“Want to talk about it?” Lydia’s voice was gentle.
Roni had the insane urge to laugh. She was supposed to be the one giving advice. “Some psychologist I am. I can’t even have a normal relationship without completely screwing it up.” She slumped. “I’m such a damn fraud.”
“Stop it,” Lydia ordered. “You aren’t a fraud, merely human. It’s okay to be human, Roni. You messed up. We all do.”
“I hurt him, Lydia.” The raw ache she’d witnessed would forever haunt her. “I’m not sure I can fix this one.”
“Yes, you can. You may need to lose the pride though. Can you do that?”
Roni stiffened at Lydia’s words. “I’m not that bad. You act as if I’ve never apologized or humbled myself. I’m not so hardheaded.”
Lydia and Jeanette looked at each other, then back at her. Jeanette spoke first. “With Lydia and me, yeah. We couldn’t ask for a better friend. But when it comes to men you have a difficult time compromising. You tend to keep them at a distance.”
Roni opened her mouth to deny Jeanette’s words but stopped when she noticed Lydia biting her lower lip, her brows scrunched in concern. Had she kept men at a distance? Roni tried to think of the last time she’d had a relationship. Something beyond a few nights spent between the sheets. Nothing came to mind. How pathetic was that?
“May I offer a suggestion?”
Roni tossed the soggy tissue in the trash can next to her desk and pushed a hand through her hair. “I’m all ears here, Lydia. Hell, I’m up for about anything at this point.”
“Go to him,” Lydia urged. “Tell him how you feel. Better yet, show him.”
Roni mulled over her friend’s words. Did she dare go to Jake? Would he tell her to kiss off? Probably. What other choice did she really have? Wallowing in self-pity wasn’t her way. Besides, he’d promised she’d get a chance to be in control and she intended to hold him to it.
Roni stood. “You’re right. I’m going to go to him and he’s going to listen to me or I’ll tie him down and gag him until he does.”
Jeanette laughed. “Now that’s the Roni we know and love.”
Roni went to the phone and dialed the local police department. “First, I have a horny teenager to deal with.”
Jake sat in his car at the back of the dark parking lot, watching as a police car arrived along with an old beat-up sedan. A tall, thin man and what appeared to be a scrawny high school kid got out of the car and went into Roni’s office, followed by the officer. Jake frowned. She must have caught her perv. Thank God for that at least.
It was a good hour before the police finally came out of the building, the kid in handcuffs, followed by what appeared to be the boy’s angry father. Once they were gone, Jake watched as Roni and her friends emerged from the building. He noticed the way the two friends seemed to be surrounding Roni, as if for moral support. When Roni turned, the security light illuminated her face. She’d been crying. His stomach knotted.
He should hate her. Drive off and never look back. Save himself from more pain. But the tears did him in. He had to grip the steering wheel to keep from going to her. He could take her in his arms and hold her tight. They could make love until the sun came up. Yeah, right. That’d be like painting the word pushover on his forehead. She’d put him in his place tonight and what did he do? He sat and watched like some lovesick fool.
Damn it, he needed to make certain she was okay, didn’t he? The idea that the perv using her computer might escalate and try something much worse had been on his mind all day. The asshole had been willing to risk a hell of a lot to watch porn videos; what else would he be capable of?
When Jake had seen her number on his cell and realized she’d tried to get hold of him, he’d started thinking the worst. Nothing could’ve prepared him for the conversation he’d overheard. Roni explaining away their time together, as if it’d meant nothing to her. As if he’d been another in a long line of fucks. He clutched the steering wheel tighter. He wanted to shake her. A bet? She’d wanted to win some damn bet. That’s all it’d been to her?
Deep down, Jake knew Roni wasn’t so callous. Afraid of intimacy, yes, but coldhearted? Not fucking hardly. Sex was one thing, but when the heart started to get involved the rules changed and the game became a whole lot more intense. Why the fear? You’re deluding yourself, asshole. Their evening together had been fantastic, but it was over. She didn’t give a damn about him.
Jake pushed the key in the ignition and turned. The Mustang came alive with a low rumble. Why had he let himself get close to a woman again? Love led to hurt. Hadn’t he already learned that lesson with Sarah?
Some guys never fucking learned.
10
Three days and nothing but voicemail. Roni clutched her stomach as pain tore through her. She stared at the cell phone in her hand, willing it to ring. She’d tried over and over to call Jake. The walls of her apartment seemed to close in around her. She needed air. With no real destination in mind, Roni grabbed her purse and keys off the kitchen table and left the stifling surroundings behind.
She took the elevator to the lobby and kept walking until she was outside. Her car was in the garage, but she didn’t feel like driving. Damn it, her chest ached each time she thought of the hurt in Jake’s voice. A real shame. I was really looking forward to kneeling for you, princess. His words reverberated inside her head over and over. How could she be so cruel after everything they’d shared? He’d been so sweet, so loving. And she’d thrown it in his face.
Fear traveled up her spin as she realized the truth. She loved him. It had been so fast though, and so completely right. It’d scared her. Shit, she was nothing but a coward.
Roni let out a small sound of distress and wrapped both her hands around her abdomen as a sense of dread filled her. What if she never saw him again? Never heard his sexy laugh, never saw his ornery grin. His sweet touches had been more powerful than anything she’d ever experienced at Kinks. God, when she thought of all the time she’d spent at that club. So many nights. She’d thought all she really needed was some good hard sex. A nice way to take the edge off. Well, she wouldn’t be going back. She needed more than a willing body now. She needed Jake.
Why had she cheapened their time together? To save face in front of Lydia and Jeanette? Hardly. It’d been out of self-preservation. As she strode down the dark quiet street, she admitted the truth. Jake had stolen her heart and the knowledge had pushed her to protect herself.
Roni reached a little street café and went inside. Even though it was summer, a chill swept through her. She sat at a table, shivering, when a waitress hustled ove
r to her. Roni ordered a cup of coffee, but the only thing she really wanted was to be left alone. After the bouncy blond brought it to her and took herself off to handle the other customers, Roni pulled her cell phone out and tried Jake once more. She slumped when it went to voicemail.
Go to him, a little voice inside her insisted. As she stared at her phone, a plan began to form. She couldn’t go back and undo that moment in time where everything had come crashing down around her. What was done, was done. But maybe she could go about repairing at least some of the damage her careless words had caused.
Finding out where Jake lived had been a simple matter of wheedling it out of his niece, Lisa. Roni had called his shop on the pretense of returning the webcam. Lisa had insisted Roni keep it, but she’d pretended to let slip that she was interested in Jake. Lisa had been only too happy to play matchmaker.
It was Friday and she wasn’t waiting another second to have it out with him. Roni shored up her nerve, opened the car door and stepped out. As she smoothed her hand over her hair and walked up the sidewalk to the front door, she wondered for the hundredth time what Jake would think of the clothes she’d chosen.
He’d seen her in a conservative skirt and blouse and he’d seen her in nothing at all. He’d never seen her as Mistress Roni. She looked down at herself and bit her lip. The skin-tight, shiny black PVC pants and high heels weren’t overly wild, but the matching scooped-neck vest with the sexy little zippers over each breast definitely screamed come and get me! She was intensely grateful it was dark out. Waiting until eight at night had definitely been the right decision.
Taking a deep breath, Roni pushed the doorbell and waited. When no one answered, she started to ring again. Suddenly the door opened and Jake stood on the other side of the glass storm door. The loose-fitting, low-slung jeans and bare chest sent a lick of fire over the inside of Roni’s thighs. Damn, the man was tasty. Hunger for a heaping helping of Jake’s delicious body nearly overrode her fear of rejection.
Nearly.
As his silvery gaze traveled down her body, Roni’s pussy responded with liquid heat. She bit her lower lip and watched as a muscle in Jake’s jaw jumped, his gaze zeroing in on her mouth. He still looked angry, but she couldn’t miss the bulge in his jeans. He wanted her. It went a long way to salvaging her self-esteem.
Without saying a word, he pushed the storm door toward her and moved back to let her enter.
Her heart leapt as she stepped over the threshold. She glanced around and noticed one glaring difference between her apartment and his house. His was neat. From the floor-to-ceiling cherrywood bookshelf to the polished coffee table, everything seemed to have a place. The big blue couch and matching chair looked soft and inviting, but she wasn’t there to admire his furnishings.
Roni turned on her heel and found Jake watching her from across the room. He hadn’t moved away from the door, an obvious sign that she wasn’t welcome to stay. With his arms crossed over his bare chest and his feet braced apart, it seemed as if he were ready to do battle.
She put her black bag on the coffee table and placed her hand on her hip. “We need to talk.”
“I thought when I didn’t return your calls all week you’d get the hint.”
“Fine, you don’t want to talk; you can at least listen.”
Jake dropped his arms and moved closer. “So, talk. I have things to do.”
The ice in his voice cut her to the bone, but she’d come this far and she wasn’t going to back down now. “I’m sorry for what I said,” she muttered, unable to contain the quiver in her voice. “It’s true that Lydia, Jeannette and I made a bet. We wanted to try and make our…fantasies come true.”
“And your fantasy was to be with a real guy. A blue-collar man,” he ground out. “Yeah, I got that part, princess.”
She stiffened her spine and barreled on. “When you asked me out, I didn’t agree because of the bet. I admit, it crossed my mind, but that’s not why I slept with you, Jake.”
“Then why, Roni?” He moved closer. Only a few inches of tan carpet separated them. “Help me understand your reasoning here, because I’m clueless. I know we just met. I never expected declarations of love from you, for Christ’s sake, but I deserved better than to be treated like nothing more than a good fuck.”
“I know.” Roni placed her palm on his cheek. He flinched, but didn’t move away. Hope bloomed. “I got scared when they started asking me about you. I didn’t want to explore my feelings, at least not then. It was too soon. I only wanted to get them to drop it.”
Jake cupped her face in both hands and stepped closer. His hard body brushed her curves. Roni’s libido leaped to life. “Your friends aren’t here now, baby,” he growled. “Give me something. Either you care and you want to see where this thing between us will lead, or you don’t. The truth now; no more bullshit.”
“I care,” she cried out. “It scares the crap out of me, but I care about you, Jake.”
He smoothed his thumb over her bottom lip and Roni closed her eyes for a few seconds, relishing the bare stroke. God, she’d missed him. It’d been a hellish week.
“Why the fear, princess? Talk to me.”
It hadn’t been the way she’d envisioned. She’d expected him to slam the door in her face. Instead, he was giving her a second chance. One she didn’t think she deserved but would take anyway.
Pointing to the couch, Roni asked, “Mind if I sit down?”
Jake dropped his hands and shrugged. Roni walked around the coffee table and sat on one end of the couch. It didn’t escape her notice when he chose to stay standing.
“I grew up in a very loving home. My parents have always been head over heels in love with each other and they spoiled Braden and me. Most families have at least one skeleton in their closet, but not ours. We were the average American family. Still are. My parents still go on romantic vacations together and they still hold hands and cuddle while they watch the nightly news.”
“They sound pretty great. What’s the catch?”
Roni shook her head. “That’s just it, there is no catch. Seeing how in love they are can be inspirational, but it can also cause you to set some pretty lofty goals for yourself. I wanted nothing less than what they had. Dad is totally devoted to Mom. He still looks at her as if she’s the most beautiful woman that ever lived. I guess I decided that if I couldn’t have that same kind of affection from a man, then I didn’t want any. Sex is nice, but beyond that I’ve never met a guy who fit all my qualifications.”
“And you didn’t want to settle for second best,” Jake quietly surmised.
“Right,” she whispered as their gazes locked. “Then you came along and rocked my world.”
Jake stepped around the coffee table and sat on the polished cherrywood surface, directly in front of her. His legs caged her in. “This week has really sucked. I’ve missed you, baby.”
Tears filled her eyes. “I thought you hated me.”
He stroked a finger down her cheek. “I was pissed at you, and a little scared if I’m being honest.”
Roni swiped a tear away and frowned. “Scared?”
“After my wife died I decided love hurt too damn much. It wasn’t worth the pain. I vowed never to go through it again.”
Roni could so easily see the love Jake still had for his wife. Some part of her worried she’d never be able to hold a candle to the woman. “I’m sorry, Jake. She must have been very special.”
He nodded. “She was, but life goes on, Roni. It’s time for me to let the past go and take a chance.” He paused, before adding, “So, do I meet Dr. Smart’s qualifications?”
Heat filled Roni’s cheeks. “It would seem I’ll need more time to properly assess the situation before I can give an accurate answer to that question.”
He tilted his head to one side. “And you think you deserve more time with me, huh?”
Butterflies flitted around in her stomach. Would he send her home after all? “Probably not,” she answered honestly. “You
should kick me out on my butt. I’d rather you didn’t though.”
“Kicking you out is no longer an option,” he murmured.
“What would you like to do then, Jake?”
“I’d like to make love to you, princess.” He leaned close and kissed her. His lips caressed hers in a touch so light she wasn’t sure she hadn’t dreamed it. “I’d like to be the man who takes you to the barbeque tomorrow,” he murmured, as he kissed his way over her chin to her neck. “I want to be the guy who proves to you that sex is hell of a lot more enjoyable when you’re with someone you love.”
“Love?” she squeaked. No one had said anything about love.
He sat back, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. “Eventually. For now, how about we start with a few dates.”
“Dates,” she repeated. “Okay, I can do dates.”
Jake looked down at her chest and her nipples hardened beneath the black vest. “And now that we have that settled, how about you tell me what this hot little outfit is all about?”
Ah, the outfit. “You promised I’d get a chance to be in control. Remember?” Damn, her voice shook and that wasn’t how Mistress Roni played. Then again, her heart had never been involved before either.
He reached out and smoothed his knuckles back and forth over the zippers across her breasts. It took an incredible amount of willpower not to lean into his touch.
“Mmm,” he whispered, “so I did.”
“D-does that mean you’ll let me?”
Jake slowly pulled his hand back. With quick efficiency he scooted the coffee table to one side of the room before going to his knees in front of her. His powerful thighs spread wide and his impressive erection filled out the well-worn jeans. He winked and lowered his head. “As you wish, Mistress.”
Roni’s temperature spiked as she stared at Jake. His head was appropriately lowered and his arms were behind his back. Total surrender. Her clit throbbed. Slowly, Roni came to her feet and walked to the coffee table where she’d placed her black bag earlier. She reached down and slid the zipper back, and pulled out the riding crop she had tucked inside. When she came back to Jake, she was pleased to note he hadn’t looked up. He had to be curious, but his gaze stayed obediently on the floor.