Icefire

by Alessandra Jay

  ***

  “Wow, these are the best pancakes I’ve ever had.” Malachai was on his third stack of pancakes and it made Juliet chuckle. He poured so much syrup on them that it was almost leaking off the plate. And it really only took a few bites for him to be done as he shoved them into his mouth.

  “Slow down there, tiger.” She smirked at him as he shoved another forkful in his mouth. She sipped her hot cocoa and stared at him above the top of her mug. Malachai was very strict about his appearance in the Dome, so to see him loosen up was a nice refreshment.

  “You know you shouldn’t let what those kids say bother you. You know what really happened and no one got hurt,” he mumbled through a mouthful of pancakes.

  Juliet looked down at her half-eaten plate and pushed it aside. “That’s easier said than done.” She was more honest than normal. But with so much being different, she thought it was good for her. And her dad seemed like he was much easier to speak to.

  “Yes. But who cares what they say anyway? I thought you were past letting them make you feel embarrassed. You're a Quinn and we're better than that.” Juliet thought her father looked like a medieval king stuffing his face with a turkey leg. Instead, he had syrup dripping off of his fork as he lifted it to his mouth.

  “Well, Dad, everything was okay. Then ice started coming out of my hands when fire already was.” It was that simple. The ice threw her off.

  That made her dad put his fork down. As he lifted his napkin to wipe his mouth, the seriousness was back in his eyes.

  “Jules, I’m so sorry. You’re right. I should have realized.” Malachai reached over and took Juliet’s hand in his.

  She could only nod.

  “What can I do? Do you want to talk about your progress? How can I help?” He grew concerned, his grip getting tighter.

  “There's no progress. All I've been able to do is make that ice whip that nearly took your hand. Clearly, I have a lot of work to do.” She took her hand out of his and buried her face in both of them.

  “That’s still improvement, hun. Even the smallest breakthrough is worth celebrating.” He stood up and slid into the seat next to Juliet.

  With one arm wrapped around her, he squeezed her tightly, causing her emotions to rush back. It seemed that once someone showed her physical compassion, she could no longer hold it together. She tried as hard as she could to keep the tears at bay.

  “I think I actually may be able to help.” That got Juliet’s full attention.

  “How so?” she asked, pulling away slightly to look him in the eyes.

  “Remember how I told you about Aunt Lidia and her loony ways?”

  “Yes. But all you really told me was that sentence she would always repeat. ‘Quinns are birds who favor fire, but ice is the secret gift to acquire.’ It was basically our only clue to why I am the way I am.” Leaning her hand on the table, Juliet rested on it as she mentally watched the wheels in her father's head turn.

  “Well, yes. But she also spoke very heavily about a book, a journal of some sort. She would tell me that it's filled with notes of the ice. But I never understood what she meant. She left me the book and I’ve had it stuffed away somewhere in my office library. Never thought I would need it, but always felt tethered enough to it that I couldn’t get rid of it.” The moment the last word left Malachai’s mouth, Juliet sprang up.

  “There’s a book of notes that could help me?! And you’re just now telling me about it? What else are you hiding from me?” Juliet felt frustrated. She’d needed help for some time, and he was only now realizing this could be of assistance?

  “Jules, I apologize. But I wasn't hiding it from you. I simply forgot I even had it. Let’s get the check so we can go look for it.” He was already lifting his hand to signal the waitress when Juliet pushed him out of the booth. Malachai theatrically fell out and stumbled to his feet as Juliet crossed her arms at him fighting off a laugh.

  That alone brought her excitement up and it completely cleared what occurred at the Dome out of her head. She no longer cared what anyone said about her or what they thought happened. All she cared about was getting back to that journal.

  She craved information that could help her, and that little glimmer of hope was just enough to get her numb from the thrill. Her leg shook and there was a spark that returned to her eyes. Malachai laughed as he stood to return to his seat while they waited for the check. Juliet could’ve sworn the waitress took much longer than usual, and she practically ran the woman over when she returned with it.

  Juliet grabbed her father's massive hand and lugged him all the way to the train station. The world around them looked like a blur as they zoomed past anyone who stood in their way. All while Malachai chuckled.

  “This is not funny.” She didn’t mean to sound like such a brat, but her anxiousness was overcoming every other emotion.

  “I know, I know. But it is quite entertaining to watch. You completely tuned into your phoenix and used it to zone into a direct path. You might not see it, but I just did, and it was great.” Malachai stepped off the train and held his hand out for Juliet.

  The moment they came through the Dome door, a soldier ran up to him.

  “Sir, you’re needed in the sim room.” The soldier was going to continue his report, but Malachai raised his hand to stop him from talking.

  “Continue to take my messages and find someone else for the sim room.” The soldier saluted Malachai as Juliet stood frozen, her mouth wide open.

  “What? This is important. Let’s go.” He took her hand and led the way as tears burned behind her eyes. It meant a lot that he put the military aside for her.

  Regardless of what the book had or didn’t have in it, she would remember how he made her feel, completely supported and completely loved.

  Chapter 10

  The Journal

  “Ah-ha! Found it!” Malachai withdrew the old leather book from the shelf all the way on the top. Juliet sat with dancing legs as her eyes grew wider and wider with every step closer he took toward her. He smiled as he sat down beside her and stared at the book.

  “Wow. I haven’t seen this thing in years. It brings me back.” He looked at the book with longing, like he was thinking of a memory that would stick with him forever. As eager as Juliet was to see what was inside, she let her dad process things.

  “Tell me what you’re thinking about.” To calm her fidgety legs, she tucked them underneath her and listened intently.

  “Well, I’m thinking of how confused Aunt Lidia made everyone. She would hold onto the journal like her life depended on it. When she gave it to me, even I was surprised she was letting it go. I never understood the importance of it, until now.” Malachai slowly untied the knot on the side of the leatherbound book. He did it with gentleness so as to secure its delicate state.

  “There are so many things I’ve heard her say that pertain to our ancestors and what our history held. No one took her seriously. I wish I did, then maybe I could remember exactly what she said so I could better help you.” He looked sad. Maybe if she kept him talking, he wouldn’t get emotional.

  “What do you know about our lineage?” It felt like something she'd asked him many times before. Now it just meant something different. Malachai had told her practically everything there was to know about their phoenix heritage. But now that she had ice in her veins, they knew there was much, much more.

  “Aside from the phoenix stuff, not much. I do remember Aunt Lidia mumbling about a great great great grandmother of mine that had a ‘hidden secret’ that now makes complete sense. This journal must have notes about her. It must.” Malachai finally flipped it open.

  The anticipation was too much for her to handle, and she shook all the way from her fingers to her toes. Only, when she saw how faint the handwriting was, it nearly crushed her. Leaning in, she groaned, fighting the lump in her throat.

  “Ugh! How are we supposed to read that, let alone understand it?” She wanted to cry so badly, but Malachai didn’
t look defeated.

  “It’s really not that bad. Focus, tune into your phoenix’s sight. It’ll help. Look here, this page has some notes on what foods could help maximize the ice.” He genuinely seemed intrigued. Juliet was not.

  “Food?” Again, she thought defeat would take her. She didn’t think something like food was as important as finding answers for balance. Crossing her arms, Juliet leaned back against the couch. Malachai gently flipped the page and looked closer.

  “Whoa! This page is about what exercises you can do. There’s some good stuff in here so far. Even if it’s hard to read. I think you’ll enjoy it if you give it a try. I don’t think I’ll be able to play hooky for much longer, but you can stay here if you’d like. If not, I’ll walk you back to your room.” Malachai closed the book and handed it to Juliet. She took it with reluctance, then held it close to her chest as she got up.

  “I think I’ll go back to my room. I have to meet with Dr. Ember later, so I’ll be there until then.”

  She didn’t argue with her dad’s offer to walk her because he seemed to be on a new path, and it was one she liked to be on with him.

  Getting to her door, Malachai lifted Juliet in a tight hug, squeezing the book into her body. She laughed as he easily set her back down on her feet. She had one hand on her door to close it when he stopped her softly with his gigantic hand.

  “Will you keep me posted? With whatever you find in that book, or with any other questions you might have, or even about your session with the doctor. My phone’s on me, so I’ll be looking forward to hearing from you. Would that be okay?” Setting his hand back down, he patiently waited for her response.

  “Sure. I can do that. Thanks for everything. I had a rollercoaster of a morning, but I’m glad you were on the ride with me.” That brought a brightness to his eyes as his grin grew into a toothy smile. He theatrically saluted her and spun around to tend to his army.

  Juliet closed the door behind her and leaned against it. Her father had changed a lot--in a good way. He was seeing the shrink, so she pinned it on that, and it filled her with pride. She shook her head and had a smile on her face as she hugged the book close.

  As she got to her bed, she kicked her shoes off, took her seat and stared at the ancient brown book in her lap. The smile faded as she zoned out on the worn-out leather. Her fingers brushed along its soft surface, bringing a chill down her spine. A pulsing energy vibrated around the book as she held it in her hands.

  An instant connection was felt so intensely that it took her breath away. As beaten as she felt earlier about the condition of the ink, the hunger was still there. With a light touch, Juliet finally flipped it open. Her heart sank as the faded writing stared her in the face.

  Squinting her eyes, she tried to piece together the journal entry. But, to her dismay, nothing made sense. Still, the book gave her hope. She thought of her dad’s advice and closed her eyes to focus on her phoenix sight. It was easy when she shifted into her phoenix form, but it was tricky when she tuned into those gifts in her human form.

  Juliet didn’t know if she was successful until she opened her eyes, and she was weary to do so. Squinting, she slowly opened them. Completely disoriented, she closed them again and shook her head. It made her stomach turn like she had motion sickness, but she refused to give up.

  Taking a deep breath, Juliet repeated the same steps, opening them in a slow and steady pace. Instead of going straight to her book, she looked up at the ceiling, hoping that the plain white base would be an easier attempt. Dizziness still overtook her, but she kept her eyes open, fighting the discomfort.

  When she felt confident enough to try something different, she moved down to the television. If she lost her focus, she saw it in double vision. But if she kept her focus, it was zoomed in like a magnifying glass.

  As she gained comfort in using the amplified sight, she moved it down to the book in her hands. To her surprise, the dim writing stood out more normally. She didn’t like to admit when her dad was right, but this time she gave him complete credit.

  The first page was written in a neat and flowing style that looked like it could be calligraphy.

  My dear Evandrus pushes me to find ways to aid my powers. As a child, he was taught that certain foods and fitness could enhance and help him achieve balance. As a phoenix, he is fortunate to have a long line of history and family members who discovered those and passed them down. As a rare alicorn, however, I have no such family history, so I am left to discover those things on my own.

  I argue that I was perfectly able to freeze a vampire solid in the attack on my family home, and though I have not seen it, I know the tree at the back of Leif’s orchard is still frozen.

  But my dearest Evanrdus insists.

  I wonder if there is not stubborness in the Quinn family line too.

  And so I do as he suggests and pray I can find those things that might help.

  With the title of the page labeled FOOD, Juliet flipped the page to the next that was titled FITNESS. It looks like she figured it out. Although Juliet was interested in what those pages had listed, she was anxious to know what the other titles were.

  As gently as she could, Juliet flipped through the pages, reading each title and mentally pinning the ones she wanted to get back to. Coming to the end of the journal, Juliet noticed that the handwriting completely changed from neat and steady to messy and shaky. She wondered what made her ancestor so nervous.

  Juliet got to the last page, which had the title BALANCE scribbled along the top. There were thick underlines beneath the title which were different from the rest. It had to be as important as she thought it would be. She knew it wouldn’t be smart to read the last entry first, but she couldn’t stop herself.

  Pictures of circles filled the two last pages, front to back. There were drawings of a flame and snowflake in each circle, but that was all that was written. Completely confused, Juliet returned to the front of the book, vowing to herself that she would read it in order.

  She spent the rest of her time in the exact same position on her bed, intently reading words written by her ancestor. She made mental and physical notes. The space around her was filled with post-its and index cards, as if she were studying for a final. The significance was just as important. As she read through, there were lists of things she couldn’t wait to tell her dad about.

  ***

  “I’m so sorry I’m late. I lost track of time and I didn’t hear my alarm because my phone died. I forgot to put it on the charger.” Juliet was out of breath as Dr. Ember cut off her rambling.

  “Don’t you worry about it. Come, sit down and take a few deep breaths with me.” The doctor started the relaxing method and Juliet followed.

  “Thanks. I’m happy to be here.” Finally catching her breath, Juliet spoke out of full honesty. Her dad was rubbing off on her.

  “I'm so incredibly happy you're here, too.” She crossed her legs and folded her hands as she looked at Juliet expectantly.

  Juliet didn’t catch on, though, and she raised an eyebrow at the doctor.

  “Were you working on something important? You look… different. And I just saw you yesterday.”

  “Different good or different bad?” She felt much different than the last time she saw Dr. Ember. But she didn’t think it was something people could notice.

  “Good, I think.” They both giggled and Juliet looked down at her hands. She trusted this shrink more than she trusted any other that she’d seen. It still seemed hard for her to spit it out.

  “Well, you know how I’ve been having trouble with balancing the new ice to my fire? My dad remembered today that his aunt gave him a journal that's been passed down for generations. But because there hasn’t been anyone else in our family that has shown signs of the alicorn or their gifts, it’s just collected dust. Until this morning.” Juliet finally found the bravery to look the doctor in her eyes, which were open wide with surprise.

  “That’s incredible! A glimmer of hope! Have
you found anything helpful yet? I’m so excited for you!” Dr. Ember’s enthusiasm was exactly what Juliet needed to continue.

  “The writing is super faded and hard to read. But if I use my phoenix sight, I can see it much easier. Also, there’s a lot more bullet points and lists than actual journal entries, which isn’t so helpful. I read through the titles to see what to expect, but the first few were things that seem, I don’t know, not so important. Food and exercise were the first two entries.” As she said it out loud she realized she sounded like a pessimistic brat and regretted it instantly.

  “How about we look at the silver lining in those obstacles? They may seem major, but really, if you look at it from a different perspective, you’ll see just how minor they are. Let’s see. So the worn-out writing, I can see why that can be frustrating. You say you use your phoenix sight for it, though, and the more you use your gifts, the more you excel at them, correct? So one day, when you go to use that sight and it comes to you easily, you’ll be grateful for the time you used it for the journal.”

  Juliet nodded, but didn’t speak another word because she knew the doctor was going to continue with her list of bright sides. Although it was the complete opposite of how she normally did things, she knew it was something she needed to hear. Leaning back, she gave the shrink her full attention.

  “Food and exercise is such an overlooked necessity that has finally been welcomed in the new world. There are so many detoxes and so many different fitness platforms for all kinds of preferences. It has come such a long way. I think it’s great that it’s already listed for you. And if it’s listed, then it can help you. I’m sure of it.

  “Pick up a few of those food items and see how it makes you feel before you tune into that icy part of yourself. Then write down your own notes about each ingredient with ink you can actually read. Who knows who you can help in the future?” Dr. Ember nudged Juliet and wiggled her eyebrows. “And lastly, there are many people who prefer lists and charts of things rather than a passage of paragraphs. Bullet points bring you right to the point with no extra stuffing. Isn’t that what you kids like these days, the easy way out?” The doctor had a smirk on her face that made Juliet cackle.