Murder Is Where the Heart Is

by Maddie Cochere

  I stood back, unzipped the hoodie, and held my arms out from my side while looking down at my thin dress. “Where did he think I was hiding a gun?”

  Before he could respond and defend Officer Collins further, Jackie came in like a whirlwind. She glanced around the room, and I knew she was taking stock of our appearance and demeanor.

  It was obvious she had rushed right over. She was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, with a sweater thrown on for warmth. She was usually impeccably dressed. Blessed with boobs, curves, and flowing red hair, Jackie was a siren. Howard’s eyes were shining and bulging as he unabashedly looked her up and down before noticing the blue pie box in her hands.

  She moved to the table and looked the girl over before sidling up to the coroner. “It’s been a while, Howard,” she said. “I thought you might like an apple pie, since you’ll be working late.”

  Her voice was sexy. I bit my lip again. She knew exactly how to play the man.

  “Apple pie. My favorite,” he said. His eyes returned to her chest. “I can’t believe you remembered.”

  She looked over at me and winked. I was going to have a hole in my lip if I bit any harder. She pointed to the body and asked, “Was this you?”

  I shook my head. “Not this time. She fell out of the trunk of her cab over by the railroad tracks on Maple.”

  While Howard and Glenn filled Jackie in on the events of the evening, I sat down on one of the chairs along the wall. Brick paced on the other side of the room.

  Jackie’s fingers flew across the pages of her notebook as she jotted down information. She glanced my way and smiled a few times. I knew she was getting a kick out of my part in the story.

  I was surprised Glenn had brought me here, and that he didn’t object when Jackie barged in, but nothing about police procedure here in small town Buxley matched anything like what I saw on television. The Buxley Police Department didn’t have a detective on the payroll, and Sergeant Rorski could only do so much with the men he had on hand. His officers took their time with interviews and gathering evidence. There wasn’t money for expensive investigative work, and I knew dusting the cab for fingerprints was out of the question. If history repeated itself, a suspect would rise above the others until it was obvious he or she committed the crime. If not, the murder would be considered a cold case.

  I would have to talk with Arnie in the morning and ask him what we should do to pursue the case on our own. I was sure Pepper and Jackie would help me run down clues if-

  Before I could finish my thought, the door swung open with such force, it crashed into the wall behind it with a loud, echoing thud.

  Doug Preston raced into the room. His hair was a mess, his shirt only partially tucked in, and his bowtie was undone. I jumped up and moved toward the table. I wanted to have a good view of Doug’s face when he realized Jackie had scooped him again.

  He was already leaning over the body when I reached Glenn’s side. He only looked at the body for a second before making a frantic swivel and shouting at Brick, “This isn’t Leslie!” With both hands, he grabbed the dispatcher’s shirt near the collar and shook the man. “Where is she?” He shook him harder. “Tell me!”

  Glenn ran around the table and grabbed Doug’s arm. “Hey, Preston, settle down. What’s gotten into you?”

  Doug’s shoulders drooped. He walked over to a chair, sat down hard, and leaned forward with his face in his hands. He sat motionless for a few moments before looking up and saying, “I heard over the newswire that a female cab driver was murdered. I thought it was Leslie.”

  He covered his face with his hands again and broke down and cried. His shoulders shook.

  Jackie and I exchanged wide-eyed looks. Doug wasn’t making any more sense than I had earlier in the evening.

  Why Doug thought the murdered cab driver would be his niece was a mystery. Leslie Preston was twenty-two years old and had recently made it big in Hollywood. Her parents were killed in a car accident two years ago, and she used the insurance money to move to Hollywood and try to make it as an actress.

  Fate was on her side. She was the new “IT” girl after landing a role on the breakout hit television series, Tell It To Daddy. She played a comedic role as the teenage daughter of a widowed man. As she experienced trials and tribulations with boyfriends and girlfriends alike, her father would sit down beside her and deliver the now famous and extremely annoying catch line, “Tell it to Daddy.”

  Glenn stood with hands on hips in front of Doug. “Why would you think Leslie was murdered while driving a cab? She’s an actress not a cab driver. Are you feeling ok? Do you want me to call someone to come get you?”

  Doug stood from his chair and began pacing, much like Brick had earlier. “Yes, she’s an actress, but she was driving a taxi tonight. It was a publicity stunt.” He looked around at all of us and said, “Now I can’t find her.”

  “Wait a minute,” Glenn said. “What kind of publicity stunt?”

  “I thought it up myself,” he said. “Leslie’s staying with us for a couple of weeks before her show starts taping again next month. She just went through a bad breakup with Rock Ryan. Reporters caught him having sex with a hairstylist on the set of his new movie. The publicity has been terrible. He has more fans than Leslie does, so there hasn’t been an outpouring of sympathy for her. The idea was to have her drive the cab for two hours and see if any of her fares recognized her. If they did, we’d run the story that way. Something like, Public Spots Tell It To Daddy Star in Hometown Despite Disguise. But if nobody figured out who she was, the story would run from the other angle, Tell It To Daddy Star Fools Hometown Fans. Either way, it would be good publicity and change the headlines in her favor.”

  “That’s quite clever,” Howard said.

  I thought it was a dumb idea. Who did he think she was going to pick up on a Saturday night in Buxley? I would think most of the calls for cabs would be for drunks after midnight.

  Glenn was frowning. “Well, what happened?” he asked.

  “We arranged the deal with Mr. Brack there, and with this dead girl here. She was supposed to leave her cab for Leslie at seven o’clock in front of Bowery Shoes downtown.”

  Brick nodded and started doing that jittery, pacing thing again. I liked him more and more for Kate’s killer. The words I Killed Her might as well have been stamped across his forehead.

  “Did Kate turn her cab over to Leslie or didn’t she?” Glenn asked.

  Brick licked his lips. “I have no idea. I was at the dispatcher’s desk in the garage office.”

  Glenn turned to Doug. “Do you know if Kate turned the cab over to Leslie?”

  “I don’t know. I made the arrangements, but Leslie knows her way around town. She was supposed to find the cab at the shoe store and start driving. I stayed home and waited for her to call with her report. She promised she’d let me know how it went when she was done.”

  “But she didn’t phone?” Glenn asked.

  He shook his head no. “When I heard about the murdered driver, I rushed right down here.”

  Everyone appeared lost in thought for a few moments before Howard said, “I think it’s perfectly clear what happened. Leslie had some secret grudge against Kate from when they were growing up together. When Kate showed up in the cab, Leslie killed her and stowed her in the trunk, only it didn’t latch properly, and she lost her on the railroad tracks.”

  Doug balled up his fists and went ballistic. He even took a step toward me before screaming at Howard, “Don’t you dare say that. Leslie wouldn’t hurt a fly, and I’m not going to have you ruining her reputation and career by spreading lies that she’s a murderer. I won’t have it, Howard, and you’ll be sorry if you do.”

  “Settle down, Doug,” Glenn said. “I think we’re done here for the night. Everyone needs to be available to give statements at the station tomorrow.”

  I felt an inkling of sadness for Doug. He was beyond distraught. “Wait a minute,” I said. “I think it’s obvious by now that Le
slie was the one driving the cab I was in. But I doubt she was the one who committed the murder.”

  “Why do you think that?” Jackie asked.

  “If she was the one who killed Kate, and then lost her body out of the trunk, she would have ditched the cab in a hurry. She wouldn’t have cruised around looking for fares or taking calls from dispatch. Besides, we still have to find an explanation for her kidnapping.”

  If I thought Doug went ballistic a few minutes ago, my news had the opposite effect on him now. He was completely deflated. “Kidnapping? What are you talking about?” he asked.

  Glenn filled him on my escapade with Leslie as my probable driver. Once again, Doug sat down in a chair, covered his face with his hands, and wept.

  I tried to think about this logically, the way Arnie had been teaching me to do. Between logic and instinct, I came up with a thought. “I know who the kidnapper is,” I said.

  Glenn furrowed his brow. Jackie had more of a spark in her eyes. She was waiting with pen ready to hear my theory.

  “The kidnapper is the person who killed Kate.”

  “How could you possibly come to that conclusion?” Glenn asked. “Why would he abduct a cab driver after just killing one?”

  I caught a slight whiff of vomit from my hair. I was ready to go home and take a shower. “I don’t know yet. I’m just telling you what I think.”

  I turned and walked out the door.

  Chapter Three

  The morning sun streaming through my bedroom window may as well have been a rooster crowing. I forgot to close the blinds before climbing into bed the night before, and sleeping in was impossible now.

  I threw the covers back and slid my feet into fuzzy orange slippers before making my way into the bathroom. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw my new red dress peeking out from under the lid of the wastebasket. Yesterday was going to be one of those days I would never forget. I wanted to talk to Pepper about it right away.

  After throwing on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, I stepped outside to hunt for my newspaper. I found it in a shrub next to the garage. Jackie must have worked late into the night to get the story of Kate’s murder and Leslie’s kidnapping on the front page. There weren’t any new details, and I still thought the case would be solved when they figured out Brick Brack was behind both the murder and the abduction. He most likely murdered Kate because she reproved his advances, but I still needed to figure out why he would have abducted Leslie, and what did he do with her?

  I tucked the paper under my arm and shuffled in my slippers across the cul-de-sac to Pepper’s house. I knew she would be there alone with the kids. Her husband, Buck, was an over-the-road long-hauler and only home every other weekend.

  I walked through the open garage and let myself into the kitchen. Pepper was at the kitchen sink, rinsing dishes and loading them into the dishwasher.

  She was surprised to see me. “You’re up early for a Sunday. What gives? And how’d you get the bruise on your cheek?”

  “The sun woke me. I couldn’t go back to sleep. I started thinking about the crazy day I had yesterday.”

  She smiled. “I’ve already heard all about it.”

  My jaw dropped. “You can’t be serious. What did you hear?”

  “Mama was on the phone at the crack of dawn this morning. She was having a fit, because you embarrassed our family again in front of the whole town.”

  I shook my head and tightened my lips. “Oh, for heaven’s sake. It wasn’t the whole town. It wasn’t even our town. The only person I knew other than Hank was Mrs. Murgatroyd. Everyone else was a complete stranger. I don’t even know why they were having their wedding in Buxley.”

  I grabbed a mug out of the cupboard and poured a cup of coffee. I needed to be more awake than I was to deal with whatever Mama was saying about me now.

  “Hank told Mama the bride was born and raised here until she was two. She wanted to be married in the town of her birth,” Pepper said.

  Hearing Pepper say it aloud sounded absurd, and we both giggled at the same time.

  “Kelly, Aunt Jo’s here,” Keith yelled up the stairs from the living room before running into the kitchen and parking himself at the breakfast bar.

  “Tell us what you did to ruin that wedding yesterday,” he said. His eyes were bright with excitement. “Did the bride punch you in the face? Is that how you got that bruise?”

  I heard Kelly running down the stairs. “Wait for me!”

  I enjoyed my niece and nephew. Kelly was ten, and Keith was eight. This past summer, Pepper and Buck made the decision to homeschool them. I was willing to wager Pepper might make it through one year, but I doubted she would continue beyond that. The kids were fun, but they sure could be a handful.

  Kelly bounded into the kitchen, her long ponytail swinging behind her. Pepper, Kelly, and I all had the same brown hair, and we all wore it long until a few years ago when Pepper cut hers short and went blonde. The spikey cut and canary yellow color was cute on Pepper, but I wasn’t so sure Kelly or I could pull the look off.

  “Aunt Jo, did you really make the bride cry?” she asked.

  I sat down across the counter from the kids and smiled. I knew they would be hanging on every word.

  “Nah. I don’t think so,” I said. “When the bride and groom showed up at the reception, they were happy. I didn’t ruin anything.”

  “Well, what happened?” Pepper asked.

  “It was the bride’s fault. She started it,” I said.

  Kelly and Keith looked at each other with their mouths open and their eyes wide. You would think I was giving them a present.

  Pepper laughed and asked, “What did she do?”

  “I was expecting to see the bride come down the aisle in a white dress. And she did. But she had a few red rose decals on the dress, and two of them were…”

  I raised my eyebrows and nodded my head while I used my thumbs and forefingers to make two circles to hold up in front of my breasts.

  Kelly’s mouth dropped open, and Keith howled with laughter, putting his head down on the counter and pounding his fist beside him.

  “No! Really?” Pepper asked.

  “I swear. Ask Hank. I can’t believe no one else laughed. It was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. It was all downhill after that. Everything made me laugh, and I couldn’t get it under control. I had to leave the church.”

  “Oh, I know what happened to you,” Keith said. “I saw it on a commercial. It’s called PSA, and it’s a brain disorder. Do you cry when you shouldn’t, too?”

  Pepper snapped a towel across the counter at him. “A PSA is a Public Service Announcement, and your Aunt Jo doesn’t have anything wrong with her brain. You laughed at Grandpa Swenson’s funeral. Do you have a brain disorder?”

  Keith tried to defend himself. “I wasn’t laughing because of the funeral. I was laughing because Grandmama farted in church. I couldn’t help it.”

  I smiled. Mama could be crass at times. She loved bathroom humor, and she had no qualms about belching or passing gas anywhere. She always said the good Lord wouldn’t have given us outlets for excessive buildups of air if we weren’t supposed to use them.

  I understood Keith’s predicament at the funeral. When we were kids, Pepper, Hank, and I found Mama’s uncouth behavior hilarious. As an adult, however, I was mortified when we were in public together. It wasn’t unusual to be browsing in a store, walk around a corner, and run head first into one of Mama’s disgusting gas clouds. If someone happened to walk up behind me at that moment, they could only assume it was me who defiled the area. I refused to go shopping with her any more.

  “Hank told Mama you were sick and had to leave the reception,” Pepper said.

  “It was horrible. There was some kind of stinky cheese on crackers, and then I thought I’d be sophisticated and eat caviar.”

  “Ew, gross,” Kelly said, screwing up her face from the thought.

  “Fish eggs,” Keith chirped. “What were they like? Were
they slimy?”

  “They tasted like motor oil, and they popped when you bit into them.” I shuddered again at the memory.

  Pepper winced. “Did you throw up?”

  I nodded. “I did. I’ll fill you in on that fun part of the evening later.”

  She understood I didn’t want to talk about everything in front of the kids. She shooed them out of the kitchen. “Ok, that’s enough gossip for you two. Grab your bikes and go tell your friends your Aunt Jo laughed in church at a bride. Be back here no later than one o’clock.”

  The kids took off. Pepper finished loading the dishwasher. I poured another cup of coffee and found a blueberry muffin in the bread box.

  Pepper sat down at the counter and asked, “What aren’t you telling me?”

  “You saw the newspaper this morning, right?”

  “Yeah. A murder and a kidnapping.” Her eyes opened wide and she gasped. “You found the body.”

  I couldn’t help laughing at the look on her face. “No, for once, I didn’t find the body, but I was in the dead girl’s cab. I was sick, so I was lying down in the back seat. A van ran us off the road, and some man abducted my cab driver. He never even knew I was in the cab.”

  Her mouth fell open. “Your cab driver was abducted and then murdered?”

  “No. The regular driver of the cab was murdered, and her body accidentally fell out of the trunk. I wasn’t around for that, but you won’t believe who was driving the same cab when I got in about a half hour later.”

  “Who?”

  “Leslie Preston.”

  It took a while for me to tell her the entire story. She was shocked when I told her I had been tased and that was why my cheek sported a bruise, but, of course, she loved it when I told her I vomited on Officer Collins’ shoes.

  “Are you going to try to solve the murder?” she asked.

  “I don’t know. I thought I’d run it by Arnie tomorrow and see what he thinks. On one hand, I’d like to, but on the other, it’s Doug Preston we’re talking about. He’s the one who thought up the crazy stunt with his niece, so I’d have to start with him. I’m kind of hoping Arnie says no.”