The Carnival of Wishes & Dreams

by Jenny Lundquist

The real reason was that Diego had never actually received the pumpkin gram from Julia. Grace had destroyed it before it ever reached Diego. It was another one of the very bad things she had done.

  Grace didn’t know what had come over her. Julia had been in a hurry yesterday when they bought their pumpkin grams, and she’d suddenly remembered a few extras she’d needed to purchase before the bell rang. She’d shoved the ones she’d already written into Grace’s hands and asked her to turn them into the box the student government had set up in the cafeteria.

  Grace hadn’t meant to read Julia’s messages. She really hadn’t. But she saw Diego’s name printed in Julia’s neat handwriting and she couldn’t stop herself from taking a peek: Hey, Diego! Want to meet up at the carnival? XXXOOOXXX

  It was all the Xs and Os that did it.

  Grace had promptly dropped the other pumpkin grams in the box, and tossed Diego’s into the trash. It was like temporary insanity. She didn’t think; she just acted, and couldn’t be held responsible for her actions. She just knew that with that pumpkin gram Julia was trying to claim Diego, just like she had claimed the best seat in the cafeteria.

  Julia shouldn’t get to have Diego, the boy Grace had loved since forever. So she destroyed the pumpkin gram.

  And now she was terrified Julia and the others would find out.

  It wasn’t like she could actually tell Julia they had a crush on the same boy. That was a quick way to get on Julia’s bad side. Being on Julia King’s bad side was a place you did not want to be. Currently Harlow Carlson occupied the top spot on Julia’s bad side. It was possible Grace was already on Julia’s bad side and just didn’t know it yet. That could happen. Poor Audrey still thought Julia was her best friend.

  “Do you think I should say something to Diego?” Julia asked.

  “Ummm . . . ,” Grace began.

  “Hey, you guys!” Erin called. “The line for the Fun Slide is already getting long. Let’s go on it now before it gets even longer.”

  “Okay!” Julia called back. Then she whispered to Grace, “Maybe later we can go find Diego.”

  “Sure,” Grace whispered miserably.

  At least there was one bright side, Grace thought to herself as they joined the line for the Fun Slide. Maybe Julia would be so distracted hunting for Diego, she’d forget what she was planning to do to Harlow tonight.

   10

  Harlow

  THE REGULAR EMPLOYEES OF THE carnival—the carnies, as everyone called them—traveled around the state with the rides and had a reputation for being a rough bunch. The carnie standing in front of the iron gates had greasy hair, a thick scar slithering up his arm, and a smile that looked more like a grimace as he greeted Harlow. “Welcome to the Carnival of Wishes and Dreams! May I take your ticket?”

  Harlow felt around in her pocket and handed it over. The ticket was red, and in shiny gold letters it said ADMIT ONE. In that moment Harlow keenly felt that she was one, and for a few painful seconds wished she had someone to walk with into the carnival. She almost wished she hadn’t let herself get separated from Erin as they approached the iron gates. Erin had sprinted ahead, saying she needed to do something before she met her friends, and since Harlow had been afraid Erin would discover her true identity anyway, she’d hung back.

  But maybe if she helped her parents reopen the factory, she could get some of her friends back. Or, at the very least, maybe everyone would stop hating her.

  As soon as she stepped past the iron gates she was mesmerized, like she was every year, by the bright colors, the blinking lights, and the smells of hot buttered popcorn and roasted peanuts.

  She walked around taking candid shots—capturing moments—with the camera on her phone. Over at the Kissing Booth, she snapped a picture of her teacher Miss Prescott smooching her boyfriend. Harlow smirked; too bad she couldn’t put that one in the yearbook. She also snapped a picture of Ethan McKinley and his best friend, Travis McManus, getting yelled at by a carnie after the two of them tried cutting to the front of the Tilt-A-Whirl line. She stood practically right in front of them, and they didn’t recognize her.

  After she thought she had enough candid photos, she set her phone to the video setting and looked around. Pictures were one thing, but she also needed to get some interviews. She saw old Mr. Tolland leaning on his cane while he watched his grandchildren ride the Zipper. She figured he’d be a great first choice for an interview; he’d retired a few years ago, but before that he’d worked for the factory since before her father was even born, back when Harlow’s grandfather ran everything.

  “Hi, Mr. Tolland,” she said, holding up her phone. “I was wondering if I could get a video of you?”

  Mr. Tolland leaned on his cane and squinted at her suspiciously. “Who are you? You’re not going to put me on the YouTube, are you?”

  Harlow removed her mask and said, “It’s me, sir. Harlow, Russ Carlson’s daughter.”

  “Oh, Harlow!” he said, breaking into a grin. “What can I do for you?”

  “Did you know my dad is bringing in some potential investors tonight?” she asked, and he nodded.

  “Everyone in town’s been talking about it,” he said.

  “I bet,” Harlow answered. “Anyway, I’m putting together a video presentation, and I was wondering if you would mind telling me—on camera—what makes Clarkville so special?”

  Mr. Tolland’s eyes lit up. “That’s a fine idea, Harlow. I’d be happy to help. Just say the word.” Harlow held up her phone and centered the camera. When she gave a thumbs-up, Mr. Tolland said, “Clarkville is special because it’s home. My family has lived here for generations. My own grandfather grew up farming the soil. . . .”

  He spoke for nearly ten minutes, his white hair blowing in the breeze, even after his grandkids joined him and it was clear they’d rather go on another ride. “Clarkville is a wonderful place,” he finished, and, glaring at the camera, added, “and if you had any sense in those East Coast heads of yours, you’d see that.” He looked over at Harlow. “How was that?” he asked.

  “Great,” she answered, although she was definitely going to have to cut out that last part. “Thank you.”

  “That’s a cool mask,” one of Mr. Tolland’s grandkids said. “Can you see out of it?”

  “Yeah. See?” Harlow slipped the mask back on and blinked at them.

  They left to go on another ride, and Harlow wandered around, replaying Mr. Tolland’s interview as she walked. She was so engrossed in the video that she didn’t hear Erin calling “Jean!” until she’d nearly walked right into her. Erin wasn’t alone; she was with Julia, Audrey, Lulu, and Grace. They were all wearing red feather boas and tiaras. Julia’s tiara appeared to be made of crystals and glittered when it caught the light. Harlow swallowed and wondered if any of them would recognize her.

  “Hello!” Erin said. “Remember me?” She turned to Julia. “This is the girl I told you about with the cute boots. Her name’s Jean.” She turned back to Harlow. “We just got off the Fun Slide and we’re heading over to the Tilt-A-Whirl—want to join us?”

  “Um . . .” Harlow knew she should keep working on her project. It would take her awhile to get all of the interviews and even more time to put together the presentation. But the idea of accepting a freely given invitation sounded nice, even though she realized her costume had worked: Erin and the others had no idea who she was. If they could see her real face, they’d walk away, guaranteed.

  “Are you in?” Erin said.

  “I’m in,” Harlow said, promising herself she’d get back to her video project soon. For just a little while, she wanted to pretend she had friends again.

  • • •

  Is there anything as exciting as patrolling the perimeter of a carnival with your friends on a giddy Friday night, searching for the boy you like?

  Harlow wasn’t so sure herself—the last big crush she had was on Ethan McKinley over a year ago, and she never told anyone because she thought Audrey might not approve. She had
n’t had a crush on anyone since. But Grace had always had a crush on Diego, and judging by the pinched look on her face, she still did, and wasn’t happy that he was Julia’s latest flavor of the week.

  After they’d ridden the Tilt-A-Whirl Julia said she wanted to wander around the carnival. At first Harlow had been glad; she’d spent the entire ride with her hands clamped down against her mask and wig, hoping neither would fly off. She wasn’t in any hurry to get on another ride, but it quickly became apparent that Julia was in a hurry. To find Diego.

  Harlow glanced again at Grace’s unhappy face and wished she could console her old friend. Julia would probably like someone else next week; she changed crushes as often as other people changed socks.

  But then Harlow remembered Grace didn’t have another week. She was moving tomorrow. Harlow wanted so badly to say goodbye to Grace. Instead, maybe she could give her a small farewell present.

  “Any chance we could stop walking for a bit?” Harlow asked, tapping at her boots. “My feet are killing me.”

  “Where did you get your boots, Jean?” Julia asked, coming to a halt. “I love them.”

  “In Chicago,” Harlow answered. “I live there,” she added, just to be safe.

  “Julia is taking two people to Chicago for her birthday,” Lulu put in. She turned to Julia. “Any idea who you’re taking?”

  Julia shrugged. “Haven’t decided yet.”

  From there the conversation turned to shoes, clothes, and music. Harlow felt her uneasiness leaking away. Her disguise was working, and everyone seemed to really like “Jean.”

  “I’m getting tired of just standing around,” Audrey said suddenly. “The bumper cars are just up ahead—let’s go ride them. Last one there is a rotten egg!”

  She took off running and everyone except Harlow and Julia ran after her. Harlow couldn’t run. She hadn’t been lying; her feet really were killing her. Wearing the boots tonight hadn’t been a smart idea.

  “I don’t see what’s so exciting about the bumper cars,” Julia grumbled to Harlow. “It’s a stupid ride,” she added, but Harlow was pretty sure Julia was just mad they’d all run off without consulting her first. She had forgotten Julia could be like that sometimes.

  “Julia!” Mrs. King came striding up to them. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere. Why didn’t you answer my text?”

  Julia batted her eyes innocently, “Oh, did you text me?”

  “You know I did.” She paused as her gaze drifted to Harlow. “Who’s your friend?” she asked.

  “This is Jean. We just met her tonight—she’s from Chicago.”

  “Nice to meet you, Jean.” Mrs. King turned her attention back to Julia and sighed. “Your dad and I have been talking, and . . .” She took a deep breath. “I’m sorry—but we’re going to have to cancel the trip to the city next weekend.”

  “You mean my birthday party? But last night you said I could take two people!”

  “I said maybe you could take two people. Your dad and I have been talking tonight, and as much as we want to, we just can’t swing it this year.”

  Julia looked outraged. “But I already texted my friends!”

  “Well, you shouldn’t have. I specifically told you not to text them yet. You’re just going to have to tell them we’ll come up with another plan that’s more doable. I’m sorry, but that’s the way things need to be this year.”

  Mrs. King walked away after that and Julia looked at the ground. Harlow saw a couple of tears roll down her cheeks. “Are you okay?” she asked.

  “I’m fine,” Julia answered. She turned away quickly and wiped her eyes. “It’s stupid, but . . . I had this dream of getting out of a fancy car wearing a party dress—I saved up money and bought a sparkly pink one—and then walking into a beautiful building.” She glanced at Harlow. “It’s stupid, I know.”

  “It’s not stupid,” Harlow said. She dreamed of things like that herself sometimes. Of sparkling, glittering moments—when everything is festive and everyone is happy. Sure, Julia would have taken a ton of selfies and posted the moment online for everyone to see, but so what? Didn’t everyone have secret wishes and dreams they might be embarrassed to tell anyone about, but desperately hoped would come true?

  “Are you mad?” Harlow asked.

  “At my parents?” Julia said, wiping her eyes again. “Yes. No—I don’t know. I should have just told them I didn’t want a birthday party this year; it would have been easier on them. My dad used to work at a factory and he lost his job last year—it’s a long story—and things have been tough. My parents almost lost our house.”

  “Lost?” Harlow repeated. How do you lose a house? she wanted to ask. She pictured the Kings’ residence—a redbrick colonial—racing down the street like a puppy suddenly let off his leash.

  “Well, not lost,” Julia said, as though she could read Harlow’s mind. “Foreclosed.”

  “Oh . . .” Harlow let the word out in one long breath, because she knew what it meant. Foreclosure—that meant the Kings had been having trouble making their mortgage payments, and if they missed too many, the bank would take their house away from them. That’s what happened to Audrey’s family last spring.

  “Anyway,” Julia continued, “my mom started selling houses and things are a little better now, but . . .” She shrugged. “Things happen, right?”

  “Yes,” Harlow agreed. Things did happen. Awful things, like fires and losing parents and houses. But hopeful things still happened too. Like standing with an old friend in the middle of the Carnival of Wishes and Dreams and talking about something that really mattered.

  Harlow wished she could capture the moment with her camera. Instead she settled for staring at Julia as she spoke. It was like getting a glimpse behind the curtain. Behind the shiny images Julia always posted online—the ones that made it seem like her whole life was just one big party.

  “Can you do me a favor?” Julia said, and Harlow nodded. “Can you keep this a secret? I don’t feel like dealing with this tonight. I’ll tell my friends the party is canceled on Monday.”

  “Sure,” Harlow said. “I’m sure they’ll understand. . . . Maybe next weekend you could do something else for your birthday,” she added. “Maybe instead of your party we could throw a sleepover. I could help you.”

  Julia glanced at her strangely. “Won’t you be back in Chicago next weekend?”

  Just like that, the moment vanished. Julia wasn’t confiding in Harlow, but in Jean. And Jean was nothing. A phantom who would vanish forever the instant Harlow took off her costume and made her way back to her lonely house on Hilltop Street.

  Harlow tugged at the edge of her mask. Maybe it was time to take it off and come clean. Tell Julia that even if she didn’t exactly understand what everyone else in town was going through, she was trying hard tonight with her video project to make things better for everyone.

  But Julia was already moving toward the bumper cars, her usual cool expression on her face, and Harlow understood that her peek behind the curtain was over.

   11

  Audrey

  5 HOURS TO MIDNIGHT

  AUDREY STOOD IN LINE, FRUSTRATED, while her friends chatted behind her. She didn’t even like the bumper cars; she’d only suggested they ride them because she’d suddenly noticed Diego passing nearby with his friends and she didn’t want Julia to see. Audrey and Grace weren’t really friends anymore—but that didn’t mean she’d forgotten about Grace’s epic crush on Diego. She’d thought if she could keep Julia from noticing him maybe she could save Grace a little heartache tonight.

  But her plan hadn’t even worked. Julia and that girl Jean had lingered behind. As Audrey watched, Diego got in line across the way for the Zipper and Julia and Jean were stopped by Mrs. King. Hopefully Julia would be too preoccupied to notice Diego. But even if she did, Audrey had a much bigger problem:

  Her father still hadn’t arrived at the carnival.

  While they’d walked around looking for Diego they’d passed
the Ferris wheel, and an irritated-looking carnie was manning the controls instead of her father. As she stood in line for the bumper cars Audrey wondered if she should leave the carnival and go home. What if he had fallen asleep after she’d left?

  “Who do you think she’s going to take to the city?” Lulu was saying. Behind Audrey, Erin and Lulu were using Julia’s temporary absence to discuss her birthday party while Grace just looked on silently, as usual.

  Audrey ignored everyone. She leaned away from the others and quickly called her dad. It went straight to voice mail. “Dad,” she said quietly. “I’m at the carnival. Where are you? Call me back.”

  She hung up and wished for the millionth time her mother was here. She would know what to do. Her father needed to show up tonight for his shift. They really needed the extra money, and no matter how many times her father told her not to worry, Audrey did anyway. Someone had to worry.

  While she waited, she decided to post another picture online. She’d already posted two since arriving at the carnival. One of her and Julia standing in front of the iron gates and one of the Curiosity Shoppe—a tented store that sold creepy candy and insects and other weird odds and ends. She’d gotten a lot of likes, but not any new followers. She turned her camera around and snapped a selfie, then examined the picture. It wasn’t a bad shot. She was supposed to send in a head shot along with her online audition for Middle School Daze. She couldn’t afford to get professional head shots done—maybe a couple of really good selfies would work?

  Just then her phone pinged—someone had followed her. Now she had two hundred ninety-nine followers! She was one ahead of Julia and one away from her goal.

  The line suddenly surged forward. They entered the track and Audrey claimed a bumper car—a blue-and-white-striped one near the front. Grace got into a car next to her, and Erin and Lulu climbed into a red one together. Jean and Julia came rushing in; they were the last two let inside, and Jean quickly hopped in next to Grace.

  “Over here!” Audrey waved to Julia. Julia didn’t seem to see or hear her; she squeezed into Lulu and Erin’s car at the last second, pushing Erin into the middle so she could drive.