Czar

by Julia Sykes

  “It means I like you.” I could tell he was being purposely enigmatic.

  He ignored my frown and reached for the vodka that had appeared at our table without my noticing. When I was in Dimitri’s presence, everything else around me seemed to fade away. Discomfort with the revelation would have made me move away from him, but he released my thigh so he could pour the vodka. The loss of his touch made me press up closer against him, my body betraying me.

  Unlike the warm vodka the bartender had served Christine, this bottle was frosted over, and the full shot glass Dimitri pressed into my hand chilled my fingers. I sniffed at it delicately, and was surprised to find a complex, almost sweet scent.

  “I believe your friend told you how to drink it.”

  My eyes snapped to Dimitri’s glittering gaze. He had heard Christine’s lewd instruction to open my throat.

  He acted before I could say something indignant. His thumb brushed across my lower lip. With that gentle contact, everything sharpened, opening up my sensory world to a degree I had never known before. His touch made my skin tingle, and his masculine scent replaced the lingering sweetness of the vodka.

  “Just try it.” His voice was lilting, enticing. He took the glass from my numb fingers. The heat of his thumb was replaced by the chilled drink. Without my permission, he tipped it back.

  Cold vodka washed over my tongue, filling my mouth so I had no choice but to swallow. It went down my throat in a smooth slide, the frigid liquid contrasting with the heat inside me.

  “Very good,” he said with rough approval. “Now I want a taste.”

  His mouth scorched mine. After the coolness of the shot glass, his tongue burned as he swiped it across my lower lip, catching a drop of vodka that lingered there. I melted for him with a mindless moan. I felt his cocky smile against my mouth, but his arrogance didn’t bother me anymore. His kiss was slow and as smooth as the vodka. He took his time exploring the shape of my lips, caressing them with his own. When his tongue pressed in, I opened for him. His hand slid up into my hair, tugging my head back so he could take my mouth more deeply.

  His well-practiced, seductive kiss turned hungrier, more urgent. He had swept me up in a torrent of lust, and I met him with equal fervor. Flames licked my skin everywhere he touched me. His free hand traced a searing line down my neck, and need pulsed at my core as his touch trailed lower.

  His fingers slipped beneath the neckline of my blouse, stroking the upper swell of my breast, making maddening little forays past the top of my bra. I became painfully aware that my nipples were aching, the hardened buds throbbing in time with my racing pulse. I arched into him, craving more.

  He tore his mouth from mine, and I whimpered at the loss.

  I found myself locked in his cocky black gaze again, only this time there was something savage about the upward twist of his full lips.

  “Come home with me,” he commanded, squeezing my breast as he spoke.

  My body pressed into his harsh touch even as my mind reeled back. The fear that accompanied his order brought my brain whirring back to life.

  I was allowing a man to grope me in a club. No one had ever touched me like this in private, let alone public.

  This isn’t me.

  His grin was sharp. “Come with me, and I’ll give you what you want.” He leaned into me, but his lips hovered at my ear rather than taking my mouth. “You’ll scream my name so many times you won’t be able to talk tomorrow.” He nipped at my earlobe. “Or walk, for that matter.”

  I shuddered, but it was as much the result of fear as it was pleasure. Dimitri wanted me to have sex with him. What was truly terrifying was that I wanted it. More keenly than I had ever wanted anything.

  But I couldn’t give a stranger my virginity. One night of pleasure wasn’t worth a lifetime of self-loathing. Because that was exactly what I would feel the following morning.

  Clinging to that knowledge, I jerked away from him. Somehow, I managed to stand on my shaking legs.

  “I have to go,” I blurted.

  His expression shifted from triumphant to darkly forbidding in the space of a second.

  “No. You’re not leaving. Not without me. Sit down, Alicia.” The order wasn’t seductive this time. It was cold and hard, with a warning edge that told me refusal wasn’t an option.

  My heart fluttered, and a lump formed in my throat.

  Dangerous.

  I wasn’t safe. Not from him, and not from myself when I was with him. Base desires urged me to return to him, to allow him to devour me.

  Somehow, I found the will to break from his glare. Without another word, I fled from temptation.

  Chapter 3

  The following day, my Russian class was spent in silent, fervent prayer. I didn’t hear a word from our professor. I was too occupied praying for strength, to forget his tempting touch. But I couldn’t get Dimitri out of my mind, and I couldn’t erase the lingering heat of his hands upon my body.

  “You had your game face on today,” Christine remarked as we left class. “I’ll have to grill you about what the prof said later. First, I need more coffee.” She rubbed her forehead dramatically. “I swear, I have no idea how you can focus so hard after a night of drinking.”

  “I only had two shots,” I hedged.

  She groaned. “I don’t even know how many Roman fed me. All I remember is drinking and then some hazy kissing. What a waste of a hot make out. Next time, don’t let me drink so much.”

  “Next time?”

  “Yeah. Next time we meet up with them. Roman said they want to see us again.”

  “I don’t think Dimitri is interested.”

  Not after I practically ran away from him.

  “Are you nuts? Of course Dimitri wants to see you again!” Her eyes slipped past me, and they widened slightly. Then a slow grin spread across her face. “Trust me. He’s totally interested.”

  I let out an exasperated breath. I was too embarrassed to tell her how I had reacted to Dimitri, how I had fled from his proposition. And I was too frightened to admit aloud just how badly I wanted to see him again.

  “She’s right. I’m totally interested.”

  My heart skipped a beat, and I stopped in my tracks. I turned slowly, both dreading and perversely anticipating the sight of him.

  His arrogant smile hit me square in the chest. Impossibly, he was even more beautiful in broad daylight than he was under the flashing lights of the club. It was almost difficult to look directly at him. I knew if I did, I wouldn’t be able to look away. I settled for staring at a point just below his chin.

  “Dimitri. What are you doing here?”

  I caught his grin in my peripheral vision. “I came to see you, of course.”

  My eyes found his of their own accord, searching for hints of mockery. I didn’t understand why he would want to see me again after the way I had left him the night before.

  Why? I wondered.

  “How did you know where to find me?” I asked instead.

  He jerked his chin toward Christine, but his gaze didn’t break from mine. “Christine told Roman about your study abroad program. I thought I would meet you here.”

  “I’m going back to the apartment to study,” my friend announced. “I’ll see you later, Alicia.”

  Panic hit me. She couldn’t leave me alone with Dimitri. Who knew what I might do?

  “Wait!” I practically yelped. “I mean, I thought we were getting coffee together,” I corrected in a more normal tone. I didn’t miss the uptick of Dimitri’s lips.

  Dang it, not even two minutes in the man’s presence, and I was already out of sorts.

  Christine shook her head with a rueful smile. “I’m the one who needs coffee. You don’t have a hangover. Besides, I couldn’t focus in class, so I need to hit the books.”

  I couldn’t focus, either, I only just stopped myself from grumbling.

  “I should study, too,” I said instead, trying my best to keep the desperation from my voice. I couldn�
�t help shooting a nervous glance at Dimitri. His smile remained firmly in place.

  “You are studying Russian. I will teach you better than a book can.” He held out his hand. “Come. I’ll show you around the city.”

  His posture was expectant, and I again recognized an order rather than an invitation.

  Maybe it’s a cultural thing. Or a language barrier. I tried to rationalize why I didn’t feel the irritation I should. All I felt was yearning. I wanted to go with him.

  It’s daytime. He can’t touch me like he did in the club. Surely I would be safe without the sensual atmosphere pulsing from the dance floor and the vodka clouding my mind. And I really wanted to explore St. Petersburg with someone who knew the city.

  My decision was already made. Even though my brain was still debating, my hand extended toward his. Long fingers closed around mine, and a jolt shot up my arm, through my chest, and down lower in my body.

  “Okay,” I breathed.

  He simply nodded, as though my agreement was a foregone conclusion.

  “Y’all have fun! See you later, Alicia.”

  My traitorous friend retreated before I could even think about begging her to stay. Unease prickled across my skin, emanating out from where Dimitri’s hand held mine. I recognized the dangerous intensity of my attraction to him.

  I sucked in a fortifying breath. Having a native show me around St. Petersburg was an opportunity I shouldn’t pass up.

  “Where should we go?” I asked, forcing myself to look up into his perfect face.

  “I have something I want to show you.” He seemed to enjoy being enigmatic. I couldn’t deny that the air of mystery about him was exciting.

  He kept a firm grip on my hand and started walking before I had a chance to question him further about where we were going. I had a feeling he wouldn’t give up his little secret, and I would discover where he was taking me soon enough.

  Anticipation thrummed through me, heightening my senses. Was this his intention? It was much more fun than doing something predictable. As we walked, I took in the city more keenly than I would have otherwise, my eyes searching for our possible destination.

  Four- and five-story buildings rose up on either side of the street in pale multicolored hues. Most ranged from cream to darker shades of yellow, but some were light pink or soft green. Endless rows of windows were broken up by the unique, intricate stonework on each building. I had always thought of Russia as a frigid place, but everything seemed to shine in the bright sun of early June.

  “Russia is a long way from South Carolina,” Dimitri remarked after allowing me to gawk at our surroundings for a few minutes. My attention snapped back to him. “Why did you decide to study here?”

  I mulled the question over for a second before answering. “I wanted to get out of my comfort zone,” I admitted. “Christine found the program online, and I agreed to come with her.”

  His eyes sparked with interest. “And how is that working out for you? Getting out of your comfort zone?”

  I cut my gaze away from his. I knew what he was angling at; he sensed my discomfort when I was in his presence. How could he not after my actions in the club?

  “It’s pushing my boundaries,” I said quietly.

  You’re pushing my boundaries.

  I cleared my throat. “I’ve lived in this tiny little town on the South Carolina/North Carolina border my whole life,” I said in a more conversational tone. “And then I decided to go to Nicholson, which is a small in-state women’s college. It’s not even in a town. So visiting Russia seemed like an adventure.”

  “Your home must be very beautiful for you to only just now be leaving it,” he remarked. “Tell me about it.”

  I was astonished that he appeared truly interested in my boring background.

  “I grew up on a farm in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains,” I answered automatically. “My family trains horses there.”

  “You train horses?” He seemed fascinated.

  “Yes. I still ride on my college equestrian team. It’s how I got a scholarship to Nicholson.” I spoke more enthusiastically now, forgetting my unease around him.

  “You must be very good at it.” His approval warmed my insides.

  I managed a nonchalant shrug. “I grew up riding. It’s kind of in my blood, I guess.”

  “You are obviously passionate about it.” His eyes roved over my face, studying my features intently. Was it possible that he found me just as mysteriously alluring as I did him?

  “What are you passionate about?” I asked, caught up in his intensity.

  His lopsided smile returned, and his eyes flared. “You.” My jaw dropped, and one corner of his mouth ticked up further. “Tell me more.”

  “Why did you want to see me again?” I asked instead of complying with his command. I truly didn’t understand his interest, especially after my behavior in the club.

  “You’re not like other women I’ve met.”

  “Because I’m American?” I pressed when he didn’t elaborate.

  His grin dropped to something more serious. “Because I want you more than I’ve ever wanted any woman, and you’re the first to refuse me.”

  I’m a conquest. The knowledge doused the sense of ease I had finally found. I tried to tug my hand out of his, but his grip tightened. He frowned at me.

  “I’ve frightened you again.” Frustration roughened his voice.

  “I’m not scared,” I flung out, pulling against his hold.

  He stopped in his tracks and turned into me. His hands shifted to brace my waist. Dreaded lust stirred in response.

  “Don’t lie to me, Alicia. I don’t understand why you’re upset when I say I want you. I want to know you better.”

  “You want to sleep with me,” I accused.

  “Yes.”

  “Well, I don’t want to sleep with you.”

  His frown deepened. “You’re lying again. Why?”

  He was truly baffled by my refusal. Some of my irritation melted. At least he was honest about his intentions. I owed him a little honesty in return.

  “I don’t have sex with strangers,” I said after a moment.

  His smile returned, as though that cleared everything up. “Then let’s not be strangers. Tell me more about yourself. I want to know you, Alicia.”

  You’ll never know me in the biblical sense. Nope. That wasn’t going to happen.

  But I was far too embarrassed to tell him I was a virgin. That wasn’t something I talked about with men I barely knew. Especially not men like Dimitri, who obviously thought nothing of having casual sex. I briefly wondered how many women he had slept with, and a strange burning filled my chest.

  Jealousy? That was ridiculous.

  “I’d like to see more of the city,” I directed the conversation away from sex. Surely it couldn’t hurt to spend more time with him during the day. I would allow myself a few hours to relish the sight of him, to revel in the feel of his nearness, before saying goodbye forever.

  “All right,” he allowed, reluctantly releasing his hold on my waist to take my hand again. “Why don’t you tell me more about your horses while we walk.” It wasn’t really a question.

  I sighed, giving in. Before long, I found myself talking animatedly about my experiences with horse showing and the competitions my college team had won. Dimitri proved to be an excellent listener, pressing for more information whenever I finished one story, so the conversation never slowed. I wanted to ask about his life, but he kept me talking, and the opportunity never came up.

  I knew immediately when we arrived at our destination. We stepped out into the large town square, and my breath stuttered. St. Isaac’s Cathedral was beautiful, its golden dome gleaming in the bright afternoon light. Spiritual wonder engulfed me, and my steps slowed.

  “We haven’t even gone inside yet.” Dimitri’s voice was colored with amusement. He tugged on my hand, urging me forward. A sense of eagerness pulsed off him, as though he was feeding off my jo
y. It only enhanced my own excitement, and I followed where he led.

  Unlike the dark wood paneling on the interior of my Episcopalian church back home, inside St. Isaac’s was a riot of color. Gorgeous frescoes covered the walls, and green columns sprang up between the images of saints. Everything was gilded and gleaming with spiritual light. I wandered around in a daze, awestruck and overcome with emotion.

  “I’m glad you like it.” Dimitri’s quiet voice broke into my reverie.

  I sniffled and brushed away the wetness on my cheeks. I found him studying me intently again, and I let out an embarrassed little laugh.

  “It’s incredible,” I said with undisguised fervor. “Thank you for bringing me here.”

  “I noticed your necklace and thought you might want to see the cathedral.” His gaze flicked to the hollow of my throat, coming to rest on my sapphire cross pendant that I wore every day.

  I reached up to touch it. “My mother gave it to me on my sixteenth birthday.”

  “Beautiful.” But he wasn’t looking at my necklace anymore. His eyes were firmly fixed on mine. His intensity was almost suffocating, and it was suddenly difficult to breathe. I couldn’t think straight when he looked at me like that, as though I was the most fascinating thing in the entire world. We were surrounded by beauty, and yet he couldn’t stop staring at me.

  “Thank you,” I said again, more quietly this time.

  His smile broadened with pleasure. “I have something else to show you.”

  He took my hand in his once again, but this time there was a different quality to the warmth of his touch on me. It still elicited the same desire low in my belly, but now there was a tugging sensation in my chest, a strange yearning to keep him close. I felt connected to him on a spiritual level rather than simply physical.

  Although that particular connection still burned white hot.

  He led me to a tight spiral staircase and began to climb. The way was so narrow that I had to follow behind him, but he didn’t release me from his grip. We wound higher and higher, until my leg muscles began to ache. It occurred to me just how far the fall would be if I tumbled backwards, and my fingers trembled in his. He glanced back at me, his gorgeous face drawn with concern.