Dirty Eden

by J. A. Redmerski

  I looked up at the hooded figures all around us.

  “No,” Samuel begged, “no, please; I can’t go through this again. Please!”

  “But it is the consequence of your deeds,” said the hooded guard who brought him here from the cell. “You must suffer as Antissa suffered. As you will again and again until Hell Eternal comes to swallow you up into its abysmal belly.”

  “No!” Samuel dropped Antissa’s body from his lap and went to raise himself from his knees, but the hooded guards were upon him too quickly. They bashed his head in repeatedly with the same mysterious object—each of them had one—that Samuel had used to kill Antissa. But he did not die as quickly as Antissa died; no, I as Samuel, was made to endure the pain for a time that felt like forever.

  …I woke up in a dank and musty cell where I caught a glimpse of my reflection in a dirty pool of water near my bare feet....

  “So, would you like to choose again?” said the Hermit.

  I raised my head and saw that I was myself again, sitting with the Devil and the Hermit in the terrible wasteland that hid the cruelest of realities. Suddenly, I fell off the rock I had been using as a chair and vomited so violently and for so long that it felt like my insides had come out with it. I couldn’t speak, or move, or think.

  “I guess not, eh?” the Hermit sniffled and wiped his nose with the sleeve of his robe. “Why did you come here, anyway, Lucifer?”

  The Devil took me by the shoulder and helped me to my feet, but it was more a gesture to hurry me along rather than one to help me.

  “I’m ready to face the truth,” I answered. “Take me back...please...just take me out of here.”

  “Bah!” said the Hermit and he turned his back to me.

  He went to open the jar where the angry naked man had been pinging against the glass. He gave the jar an unsteady twist and then reached inside, taking the man up by pressing his thumb and index finger firmly around the man’s tiny head. The man kicked and thrashed about. And then the Hermit arranged his hand around the man’s body, brought him up to his monstrous mouth and bit his head clean off his neck. He chewed and swallowed before finishing the rest of the still kicking, headless body.

  The Devil had to aide me—this time with true help rather than hurry—away from the Hermit’s hut; I could not stand without it. But it was not the old body that had made me so weak; it was the Truth. It was the truth I knew I would have to face if the truth before it was not confronted, and thus the Devil took me out of Hell and back to the coffee house, where I stopped in mid-hit as I stood over my Uncle Bill, dumbfounded and utterly traumatized.

  I knew what I had to do.

  “Upon realizing, this ain’t no joke.”

  --

  I PULLED THE HEDGE clippers from my backpack and took off Uncle Bill’s head. I then went on to my cousin, Rachel. Like everyone else in the room, she did not scream or try to flee. I killed every one of them.

  Blood dripped from every wall, table and chair. Entrails hung from the eerily moving ceiling fans with a quiet and uninterested sound. Headless bodies sat upright, but slumped in chairs next to their untouched coffee. The yapping Pomeranian purse was squashed into the floor; its tongue lolled out of its crushed mouth. And Kate; she lay over the bar next to the cash register, with my ex-wife and fake grandmother. I couldn’t recall exactly how I brought them to their end. All that I knew was that they were dead, and for some reason I refused to question, I didn’t feel bad about it. Maybe it was because after the killing spree, I knew deep down that I had only killed a metaphor, or simply, a concept. I had faced the truth and disposed of it without looking back, without regret or fear of it and without running from it so that I could move forward.

  Dripping in blood and still wielding the hedge clippers that hung at my side, I walked out into the city street where the Devil stood waiting. I threw the hedge clippers at the Devil’s feet and looked upon him with an expression of unsatisfied totality. No fear. No questions. No perplexity.

  “Now give me the seed,” I demanded. “The seed to the Tree of Truth. Give it to me.”

  I held out my hand to the Devil and he smiled crookedly.

  “I can’t give you anything,” he said.

  He turned and began to walk away, but I grabbed his shoulder and swung him around to face me again.

  “Then I’ll take it!”

  I took up the hedge clippers again, viciously striking the asphalt until they broke in half, one blade falling to the ground and the other clenched in my fist where I swung it like a sword, taking the Devil’s head off in one clean swipe. I let the blade fall where it clanked against the street, and then I went to my knees into the street too, pressing my palms firmly against the asphalt. My shoulders remained hunched over as I let my head fall heavily between them and tried hopelessly to catch my breath.

  I didn’t know what to look for. The seed could be anything. And once again, I felt completely defeated.

  Softly, I shut my eyes and choked back that feeling of failure in my throat. But then I felt a strange ghostly presence and a soft voice echoing in my mind:

  “Through my eyes one can see, the truth of this totality. Pluck it out and bury it there, where the Serpent braids the Angel’s hair.”

  When I could focus on my surroundings again, the first things I saw looking back at me were the soulless, endless depths of the Devil’s eyes.

  I bent over, grabbed the head by its long, bloodied hair, and peered down into the eyes of the mock Devil, studying them both long and hard. I dug a finger into the right eye first, pulling it out and severing it from the nerves and blood vessels. The left eye followed. Carefully I hid them inside my coat pocket, next to Vanity’s Mirror. Uncertain which one I might need, I decided to take them both.

  “Norman!” shouted Tsaeb from somewhere behind. “Where the hell have you been?”

  “We’ve been looking for you for hours!” said Sophia with a disgruntled sneer.

  The scenery around me changed in a breath. What was once the gray city of abandoned cars and skyscrapers was now a familiar wooded area on the bank of an enormous body of water. I noticed that I was young again, but also that I had lost my backpack.

  Tsaeb and Sophia ran toward me, both trying to get to me before the other. Taurus followed closely behind, not having to run to keep up as his legs covered many feet when he lumbered across the forest bed.

  “You can’t just leave like that!” Tsaeb was glowering.

  I ignored both of them and turned my attention only on Taurus. “Where’s the Serpent that braids the Angel’s hair?” I said to the giant.

  Taurus looked puzzled. “What? Oh, you must be talking about the Angel, Paschar; she’s been prisoner of a serpent named Samyaza since the Day of Darkness.” Taurus shot me an analytical eye. “But why would you want to go there?”

  “Are you going to help me, or not?”

  “Well,” Taurus contemplated, “it is rather awkward and personally I—”

  “You don’t have to take me there,” I said urgently, “just tell me how to get there and that’ll be enough.”

  Tsaeb and Sophia listened quietly from the side, both standing with their arms crossed, a mixture of intrigue and concern etched into their faces. At the same time, a small boat was making its way toward the shore quietly through the thin mist that blanketed the top of the still water. I was the only one that did not turn to see it, though I was well aware of its presence.

  “It’s just across the lake there,” Taurus revealed, pointing his massive finger. “You see the waterfall just up the way—there to the left near the cliff side there’s a clearing under the black trees; the only spot the sun still shines in that place.”

  “Yeah, how’d you know?” Tsaeb looked distrusting of me all of a sudden.

  “I didn’t,” I answered, “but I think I had help. I don’t even know where ‘here’ is, or even how I got here. All I know is I have to get to the other side of the lake fast, and if the owner of this boat doesn’
t take me there, I’ll kill him and take myself there.”

  Three sets of eyes widened simultaneously, but only Tsaeb spoke:

  “I don’t know what happened to you, or where you went, but wherever it was it changed you. And I have to say, I’m just a little bit afraid.” He brought up his hand, squinted one eye, spaced his thumb and index less than a half an inch apart and added, “Only a little though. Juuust a smidgen.”

  “I’m not afraid of him at all,” said Sophia. “But I do like this new Norman.” She smiled and patted me on the arm. “Finally grew a nut sack, I see. Good for you!”

  I ignored them completely and stepped further toward the edge of the lake as the boat approached. It made its way through the mist and over the water seemingly without stirring a ripple. The figure inside the boat, quite thin from the looks of him, barely moved while pushing a single ferryman’s pole behind him through the water.

  “This is gonna be good,” Sophia giggled to Tsaeb. “I hope the boatman gives Norman some lip; it’ll be the highlight of my day.”

  “I can’t believe I’m going to say it, but I agree!” said Tsaeb.

  The boat sloshed and grinded as it slid onto the sand and gravel-covered shore and came to an abrupt stop. It was a modest-sized boat with a fuller belly than a canoe and three wooden benches at its bow, stern and aft; but it would take two of them to hold the likes of Taurus.

  And the boatman wasn’t a man at all.

  The woman raised her head underneath the hood to reveal that she was as dirty as the rugged cape that covered her. Still as pretty as any girl and did not need makeup to show it. Her hair was the color of wet sand, long and streaming from the confines of her hood, but messy and tangled. On both sides of her face, streaks of dirt lingered as if she had washed it that morning in a muddy creek bed. Her garb was tattered and worn as were the old black boots that peeked out from under the ends of her ankle-length dress. But there was little frailty about this girl and she was not intimidated by her company on the shore. She seemed relaxed and uninterested as she jumped out of the boat and grabbed it by its bow and began dragging it further ashore.

  “I need you to take us to the other side of the lake,” I said stepping up immediately.

  The woman ignored me at first, before scarcely looking at me as she fiddled with the ferryman’s pole. She placed it carefully under the center boat seat. When she did finally look at me, her face showed no emotion whatsoever.

  “Can’t help you, sorry,” she said before going back to her business.

  “No time to compromise,” I said clenching my fists at my sides, “and if you won’t help—”

  The young woman stopped and looked upon me with all of her attention now. “You’ll do nothing,” she snapped, “this is my boat and I have no tolerance for beggars.

  “Find your own damn way,” she added. “Contrary to what you might think, my boat isn’t public transportation.”

  Sophia, who had been eyeing the woman all the time with sneers and jealous smirks, stepped in between her and me. Taurus had moved to take hold of her hand, but was not fast enough. Tsaeb had been smiling the entire time. If he were not so greedy with what little stolen riches he had left on him, he would have tossed in a gold coin to watch this humorous, but possibly violent scene.

  “You can’t talk to him like that,” growled Sophia.

  I pushed her aside.

  The woman glanced at Sophia. “Buzz off,” she said simply.

  “I have payment,” I said as I began urgently fumbling my coat pockets, my fingers grazing the slimy eyeballs I had taken from the mock Devil.

  “Awww, damn it!” said Tsaeb, looking overly disappointed all of a sudden. He threw his head back and slouched his body forward with a sigh. “You wuss!”

  When I realized I had nothing on me that I could give, I grabbed Tsaeb.

  “Give me one of the rings,” I demanded.

  Tsaeb’s attempt to jerk out of my grasp was only momentarily successful. He stood still now, glaring up at me through changing yellow-colored eyes. I was in no mood to wait; I grabbed Tsaeb’s hand and started prying the biggest ring off his finger. It was difficult. Tsaeb’s deceptive boyish fist was stronger than my mere human grip on it. Finally, he gave in, realizing what I was here to do and what the outcome meant for him. Tsaeb wrenched back his hand, slid the giant ring off, and thrust it angrily into my palm.

  “Take this,” I said to the woman.

  “Why don’t you all just walk around,” the woman said. “You can make it across by nightfall.”

  “There’s no time,” I urged, forcing the ring into her view. “Is it a deal, or not?”

  The woman finally took the ring into her fingers and gazed upon it observantly. “Good quality. Fine craftsmanship.” She tucked it into her cloak. “I’ll take you across,” she said, looking over at Taurus, “but obviously, not all of you.”

  Taurus bowed like a gentleman. “Perfectly fine,” he said. “I have places to be anyway, and seeing as how I’m not one of Samyaza’s favorite people, I’d rather avoid the certain conflict of his company if I can.” He added, tapping his temple, “Crazy that one is. Didn’t like it when I said his nose was slightly crooked.”

  “Samyaza?” said the young woman, narrowing her gaze.

  I had hoped to complete this deal without revealing to any more strangers anything else about my affairs. I had a bad feeling that eventually the wrong stranger would get wind of who I was and what I was in Creation to achieve. I hoped that this would not be that inevitable time. This woman was skinny and not as tall as I was, but I had a feeling that she could probably kick my ass.

  The woman pulled the ring back out of her pocket and tossed it to me.

  “Sorry,” she said shaking her head, “but I know who you are. I’ve heard the rumors; the man Lilith is looking for. They’ll have my head for helping you. They’ll probably have it anyway just for being seen with you.”

  “Who’s going to tell?” I pressed her. “And if you think they’re gonna kill you anyway now, why not help?” I felt my words of comfort were anything but, but they were all I had. “Whose side are you on, anyway?” I added.

  “Me? No one’s.” The woman pulled the hood further about her face as her guarded eyes surveyed the area. “Being on either side will get you killed.”

  I was getting antsy. All this talk was a waste of time. I needed an anxiety pill.

  “Please, I-I’ll give you the ring and Vanity’s Mirror.” I reached inside my coat pocket and took out the mirror, holding it up.

  Tsaeb, Sophia and Taurus all three gasped.

  “What are you doing?” shouted Tsaeb.

  Sophia lunged for the mirror but missed and fell as I raised it above me.

  The woman’s eyes widened with intrigue.

  “I don’t need it anymore,” I said hesitantly, though I wasn’t so sure that was exactly true. “It took me where I needed to go and I no longer have a use for it.”

  I regretted that, but the offer was already put out there and the woman probably would want nothing less now. I remembered too late that the Tree of Life told me the mirror would show me the way to the Center of Eden. The unexpected help it had given me that eventually led me to Hell had overshadowed that important fact and blinded me in my desperation.

  “No, Norman!” Sophia screamed. “You can’t give that to her! I wanted it! Please!”

  As the woman took Vanity’s Mirror by its painted wooden handle, Sophia lunged at her. The scuffle was brief, and in seconds, the young woman stood over Sophia with the heel of her boot pressed harshly against Sophia’s chest. Sophia looked more stunned than she looked defeated. It was clear to everyone that this type of defeat was not something she was used to.

  Taurus hoisted Sophia up, dusting off her dress with both of his giant hands. Then Sophia came for me next, grabbing tightly to my clothes and letting her weight drop. “Norman, please! That mirror can give me the one thing an imp bean probably never will!” The heels of her
shoes dug deeply into the wet gravel.

  “I accept your offer,” said the woman. “Now give me the ring.”

  I swallowed hard, handing the ring back to her. She put both of her new possessions away safely behind the folds of her cloak. I knew I had just made an idiot mistake. I’ll think of a way to get it back, I thought. I’ll take it from her if I have to. I’ll let Tsaeb have his way with her. I felt like shit for thinking that way, but it had to be that way. I was no longer at home in the only reality I believed before existed. I was in a place that demanded my full worth and ability. Reality was different here, and petty things such as human morals and laws were more likely to help kill me than they would do anything else.

  “Thanks, now can we go?” I said, feeling my anxiety only subside a little.

  Tsaeb was already sitting in the back of the boat, clearly still disgruntled about the lackluster outcome of the scene before. Sophia was completely devastated. “Should’ve just killed her like you said and took the friggin’ boat, Norman.” She spat at me and crawled inside the boat, too.

  I may have to after all, Sophia...I may just have to....

  I hopped in last after the woman and took a seat on the center bench.

  “Thanks, Taurus,” I said waving from the boat. “When this is all over, hopefully you won’t get caught in the crossfire.”

  Taurus helped out by giving the bow one big push, which sent the boat easily off into the water and left it with a bit of speed to spare. “Quite welcome,” he answered as he waved us on. “I wish you luck!”