An Amish Homecoming

by Amy Clipston

  Yet now, looking back on how she’d handled her departure, she would try harder to keep her parents included in her life. She would never again cut them out the way she had in the past.

  She wiped away a tear as she stared up at the ceiling through the dark. She had to find a way to make amends for the mistakes she’d made—if it wasn’t too late.

  “Lord,” she whispered as a prayer filled her heart. “I’m sorry for not honoring my parents the way I’m supposed to. I want to make things right, but I don’t know how. Please forgive my sins and guide my words and my actions to help me earn their forgiveness. And please heal my broken heart. I miss Simeon. And I also miss the relationship I once had with my parents and my friendship with Ian.”

  Moving onto her side again, Eva blinked back more tears as she waited for sleep to find her.

  Eva set a bowl of chicken salad in the center of the table, which had five place settings for lunch. Movement in her peripheral vision drew her attention to the kitchen window that faced the back of the house. She swiveled toward it and found Ian and Junior playing catch in the grass just beyond her mother’s garden.

  Ian tossed the ball to Junior, who caught it and then beamed as he jumped up and down.

  Ian clapped his hands and then said something that looked like, “Wunderbaar!”

  Eva crossed her arms as she moved to the window. She watched Junior toss the ball to Ian, the ball falling short of Ian by several inches. With a smile, Ian walked over to him and began giving him what looked like instructions on how to throw the ball to make it travel farther.

  Ian walked away from Junior and beckoned him to throw the ball again. They volleyed it back and forth several times, and each time Junior’s toss improved.

  Eva’s heart warmed as Ian kept a patient expression on his face while teaching her son how to play catch. Not only that, but he was so handsome as the bright afternoon sun caused his dark eyes to sparkle.

  He was a good man to his core, and she had no right to accuse him of using her parents. He had always gone out of his way to be kind to her and her parents. When he was a teenager, he’d work on the farm on his days off and refuse to take extra pay. When a boy in Eva’s youth group broke up with her to date her friend, Ian sat on the porch with her for an hour as she cried. He was a true friend, and he deserved her respect, not accusations about his intentions.

  Regret nipped at her as she recalled their conversation from Sunday. Somehow, despite her prayer of confession, she’d let four days pass since their heated discussion. And while they’d been cordial to each other in passing, they hadn’t worked out their differences. It was hard to know where to begin.

  Eva needed to apologize to him. And she needed to thank him for being so kind to Junior.

  She also needed to talk with her mother, but it was even harder to know where to begin with her.

  “There was a message for you.”

  Startled, Eva jumped and spun toward her mother as she walked into the kitchen.

  “I’m sorry I surprised you.” Mamm set a pile of letters on the counter and looked past Eva to the window. “What are you doing?”

  “Watching Ian teach Junior how to throw a ball.” Eva nodded her head toward the window. “Look.”

  “Oh my goodness!” Mamm sidled up to Eva. “Look at him throwing that ball.”

  “I know.” Eva couldn’t stop grinning. “Ian is a gut teacher.”

  They stood in silence for a few minutes as Junior and Ian continued to play catch.

  “Did you hear what I said earlier?” Mamm broke through the quiet.

  “What?” Eva pivoted toward her.

  “Your mother-in-law called and asked how you and Junior are doing. She asked you to call her when you have time.”

  “I’ll call her later.” Eva crossed the kitchen and began pulling drinking glasses out of a cabinet. As she set them on the table, she glanced at her mother, who was placing a napkin under the fork at Ian’s spot. “Why does Ian eat every meal here?”

  Mamm’s forehead furrowed as she looked up. “What do you mean?”

  “Why doesn’t he buy his own groceries and make his own meals?”

  “Because it’s part of our deal.” Mamm shrugged.

  “What do you mean?”

  “He helps your dat run the farm, and in exchange he gets room and board along with a small salary.”

  “Wait a minute.” Eva paused as her mother’s words marinated in her mind. “He gets a small salary?”

  Mamm nodded. “When we all realized we needed his help full-time, Ian asked for only a small salary, insisting he would be froh adding room and board and living in the daadihaus.”

  Eva swallowed as confusion taunted her. She no longer believed Ian was trying to take over her father’s farm, but why wouldn’t he want to draw a larger salary so he could build a house of his own and have a family?

  “Did you see me catch the ball and then throw it to Ian?” Junior asked with a mouthful of chicken salad.

  “Ya, I did.” Eva smiled at her son across the table. “You did fantastic, but please chew and swallow your food before you talk, okay?”

  Ian grinned at her and then looked down at Junior. “He’s a fast learner.”

  “Danki for teaching him.” Eva’s words leapt from her lips without any forethought.

  “Gern gschehne.” Ian’s gaze tangled with hers, and the intensity in his eyes caused her breath to stall in her lungs. They studied each other for a long moment, and her cheeks heated as her pulse hammered.

  “Do you need anything from the hardware store?”

  Dat’s question caused Ian to turn toward him, breaking the connection.

  “What’s that, Harvey?” Ian asked.

  Eva looked down at her plate and picked up her chicken salad sandwich as bewilderment raced through her. Where had that connection come from? It was similar to the electricity she’d felt on Sunday when she touched his hand after pouring his coffee. Why were her feelings for Ian so intense after spending such a long time apart?

  “I was wondering if you need anything from the hardware store.” Dat wiped his beard with a paper napkin.

  “No, I don’t think so,” Ian said. “Are you going there this afternoon?”

  “Ya. Remember? Ted is going to pick us up soon. Mary has some errands, and I’m going with her.”

  “While you’re gone and Junior’s taking his nap, I can do a few chores around here,” Eva said.

  “I’m not tired.” Junior rubbed his eyes.

  Eva bit back a smile. When she stole a glance at Ian, she found he was watching her. His lips curved into a grin, and her heart jumped. She longed to break this connection between them. She hadn’t expected to fall for Ian, but it seemed impossible to ignore her growing affection for him.

  “I’ll get some supplies to repair the fencing around the chicken coop,” Dat said.

  Ian popped a potato chip into his mouth. “Great. I can get started on that tomorrow.”

  “Can I help?” Junior asked between bites of his own potato chips.

  Eva swallowed a sigh of relief.

  Danki, Dat, for steering Ian’s attention away from me!

  When they were finished eating, Eva helped her mother carry the dishes to the counter as Ian, Dat, and Junior disappeared outside.

  When Mamm began filling the sink with water, Eva rested her hand on her shoulder. “You can get ready to go. I’ll clean up.”

  “Nonsense.” Mamm shook her head. “I’m not going to leave you with this mess.”

  “Don’t be gegisch.” Eva waved off her comment. “Believe me, I’ve cleaned up worse, and I don’t mind doing it. Go get ready.”

  Mamm hesitated. “Are you sure?”

  “Of course I am. I’ll get Junior down for a nap and then I’ll clean up. You enjoy your errands with Dat.”

  “Danki.” Mamm gave her a quick hug, and Eva’s heart swelled at the sign of affection. She had a feeling her mother didn’t want to let go.

&nbs
p; Mamm hurried toward her bedroom, and Eva stepped out onto the back porch, where Dat and Ian already stood talking with Ted. Eva waved at him and then turned to her son, who sat on the glider with one elbow on its arm, his head supported by the palm of his hand.

  “It’s time for your nap.”

  “No.” Junior yawned. “I’m not tired. I want to play catch with Ian.”

  Eva sank down beside him. “You are tired. And Ian has chores to do.”

  “No, I’m not tired.” Junior’s lower lip trembled. “And I want to play with Ian.”

  Eva rubbed her temple in frustration. Junior was on the edge of a meltdown, and she longed for her mother-in-law to help her distract him.

  As if sensing Eva’s anxiety, Ian crouched in front of Junior and touched his shoulder. “I have an idea.”

  Junior looked skeptical. “What?”

  “If you promise to take a nap without complaining, I’ll play catch with you this afternoon.”

  “Really?” Junior’s eyes sparkled as he sat up straight.

  “Only if you promise.” Ian held up a finger. “Do you promise?”

  “Ya, ya.” Junior nodded, his blond hair bobbing up and down.

  “Gut.” Ian gestured toward the back door. “Go on, now.”

  Junior stood and rushed into the house.

  “Danki so much,” Eva told Ian after the door clicked shut behind her son. “He was on the verge of a tantrum.”

  “It’s no problem. I like spending time with him.” Ian gestured inside. “You’d better get him in bed before he changes his mind.”

  “Gut idea.” Eva went into the house and up the stairs, marveling at Ian’s skill with her son.

  As Eva turned down Junior’s bed, a question filled her mind. Would Ian ever have any children of his own?

  CHAPTER 7

  The knots in Ian’s shoulders were as hard as rocks as he washed a plate, rinsed it, and set it in the drying rack. His mind raced with what he planned to say to Eva when she came back downstairs.

  After saying good-bye to Ted, Harvey, and Mary, he had stepped back into the kitchen and started washing the dishes. He couldn’t stand the distance between Eva and him any longer, and now was his opportunity to speak to her alone. He prayed she would talk to him while they cleaned the kitchen together. He was going to save their friendship, no matter how long it took them to work it out.

  When he felt someone staring at him, he turned to where she stood in the doorway. She was stunning, clad in a mint-colored dress that accentuated the flecks of green in her gorgeous hazel eyes. She seemed somehow more beautiful than she was six years ago. Was he imagining her transformation, or had maturity deepened her beauty?

  She crossed the kitchen and folded her arms over her black apron. “What are you doing?”

  “The dishes.” He held up another clean plate and grinned. “See?”

  She rolled her eyes, and he bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. How he enjoyed taunting her!

  “I’m perfectly capable of cleaning the kitchen. You can go outside and do your chores.” When he didn’t move, she added, “Go on, now.”

  “How about I wash and you dry?” He raised his eyebrows. “Please?”

  “No, I’m sure you have things to do.”

  He eyed her as he dried his hands on a dish towel. “I’ll stop washing if you do something for me.”

  “What?”

  He tossed the dish towel onto the counter. “Sit and talk to me.” He held his breath when she hesitated.

  Then she moved to the counter and opened a cookie jar.

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “We can’t sit at the table and talk unless we have dessert.”

  He shook his head. “You’re still full of surprises.”

  “Pour two glasses of milk to go with the kichlin,” she tossed over her shoulder.

  Ian followed her instructions, and then they sat down across from each other at the table with a platter of oatmeal raisin and chocolate chip cookies between them. After a silent prayer, they began to eat the cookies and drink the milk, but without speaking.

  He gathered his thoughts as he chewed a second chocolate chip cookie. After swallowing, he took a deep breath and gathered his courage. “I need to apologize. I was out of line on Sunday.”

  “No.” She sat up straighter and shook her head, causing the ties of her prayer covering to bounce off her shoulders. “It wasn’t your fault. I provoked you. I was wrong, and I’m sorry. I said terrible things to you. Please forgive me.”

  “Of course I forgive you.” He swiped an oatmeal raisin cookie from the platter and broke it in half.

  She studied him a moment. “Why don’t you allow my parents to pay you a better salary?”

  He relaxed back in the chair and blew out a puff of air. “I’m not after your inheritance.”

  “I know.” Her eyes glistened. “I’m sorry for accusing you of that. I’m just trying to understand why you would run this farm for Dat and accept only a small salary. Anyone else would expect a larger salary for all the work you do. Why don’t you?”

  He shrugged. “I care about your parents, and I’m grateful for all they’ve done for me. They’ve kept me employed for years, and I like working here.”

  Soon a single tear traced down her pink cheek, and his heart ached for her. He longed to brush away the tear with the tip of his finger, but touching her that way would be too forward. He handed her a napkin from the holder in the center of the table, and she dabbed her cheek.

  “Danki for taking such gut care of my parents.” She sniffed and then wiped the napkin over her nose. “I feel terrible for hurting you.”

  “Stop.” He leaned forward and reached for her hand, but then stopped, pulling his hands away. “It’s forgiven.” He took a bite of his cookie and then set it on his plate.

  “Danki for being so nice to Junior. He really enjoys the attention. I think he misses his onkel.” She took a sip of milk.

  His thoughts moved to Simeon’s family and her life in Ronks.

  “I’m sorry for all you’ve been through.” He moved his finger over the condensation on his glass. “It has to be tough raising Junior without Simeon.”

  She stared down at her half-eaten cookie. “It is, but his family has been a tremendous help.”

  “Does Junior ask about him?”

  “Ya, he does. We tell him stories about how Simeon fought fires. Now that Simeon’s younger bruder, Nathan, is a firefighter, Junior seems to understand more.”

  “Is that what drew you to him?”

  “What?” Her eyebrows drew together.

  “Were you attracted to Simeon because he was a firefighter?” The words tasted bitter on Ian’s tongue.

  A faraway look filled Eva’s face as if she were recalling the moment she met him. “I suppose that was part of it. It was as if there was this invisible force that drew me to him. It sounds gegisch, but when our eyes met, something unspoken happened between us. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, and all at once I knew we were supposed to be together.” Her cheeks blushed bright red. “I guess it’s shallow to say I was drawn to his looks, but it’s true. He was so handsome, and his stories about firefighting were exciting.”

  Ian felt his jaw tighten. He’d known Eva for years, but she took one look at Simeon Dienner and knew she was going to marry him. Somehow that just didn’t seem fair. Jealousy was a sin, but he couldn’t stop the emotion from sinking its sharp claws into him.

  “I was blessed beyond measure when he asked me to marry him,” she continued. “We had our tough times like every couple, but we made it work. He was so excited when we found out I was expecting Junior, but he never even got to meet him.

  “Sometimes I have nightmares about the night he died. I relive the moment Simeon’s fire chief came to the house and told us what happened.” Eva paused and took a deep breath, her eyes glimmering with fresh tears.

  “In an instant he was gone. I used to wonder what would ha
ve happened if he hadn’t been on duty that day. Would another firefighter have fallen through the floor and died? But it’s a sin to question God’s will. There’s a reason God took him, and I had to accept that.” Her voice quavered, and Ian fought against the urge to rush around the table and pull her into his arms. She grabbed another napkin and wiped her eyes and nose.

  “I’m so sorry,” Ian whispered. “You must miss him terribly.”

  “Ya, I do.” She paused, as if gathering her words. “Simeon’s death is a loss that defies words and created an emptiness in my heart that will never be filled.” She traced the wood grain in the table with her fingernail. “I miss him every day, and Junior reminds me of him. But having a piece of Simeon makes it easier too. I never imagined I’d lose him that way. I thought we’d grow old together. I thought we’d have more kinner.” She was silent for a moment once again. “But I try not to let my grief overtake me. I have to be strong for Junior.”

  “Do you miss Ronks?” Ian braced himself for her response.

  “I do.” She folded the napkin in half. “I’m very close to my sister-in-law, Kayla, and my mother-in-law, Marilyn. Mei mamm said Marilyn left a message for me earlier. I need to call her back and see how everyone is. We all were devastated when we lost Simeon, and we had to be strong for one another. I don’t know what I would have done without them.”

  “You could have come home after Simeon died. Your parents would have supported you. I would have supported you too.”

  She studied him but remained silent for several moments. “Why aren’t you married?”

  He flinched as if she’d struck him, and she laughed at his reaction.

  “You look so stunned.” She handed him a chocolate chip cookie. “I think you need this.”

  He smirked before taking a bite.

  “Now answer my question. If your bruders are married, why aren’t you? You’re thirty, Ian.”

  “I guess I haven’t found the right maedel yet.”