Our Kind of Love

by Shane Morgan

I hold up a hand and gesture for him to stop talking. “Look, I’m not even trying to hear this right now. I have something important to take care of, and when I come back, you better be gone.”

  He throws his head back, aghast. I really don’t care about it. He’s had plenty chances in the past and I’m all out of forgiveness where he’s concerned.

  I start for the front door. Dad slants and watches me walk by him. “I think we should talk, Mitch. There’s a lot that we need to work on.”

  “Not interested,” I scoff and go out the door, slamming it shut behind me.

  The nerve of him, wanting to take on the father figure in my life now. I mean, what if I didn’t come back, would he even look for me? Does he know about my time in juvie?

  I’m not going to think about all that right now. I’m going to call Greg so he can let the Harrisons know I’ll be stopping by. My energy is focused on facing Lewis. After that, it’s goodbye to Haxtun.

  Chicken shit.

  That’s how I feel right now. I spend a good five minutes outside of Lewis Harrison’s brick house, pacing by their red maple tree. I try to think of the right words to apologize for what I’ve done.

  Suddenly the thought crosses my mind that he’s probably going to kick my ass, and that this whole wanting to meet with me is about payback. I didn’t even ask Greg if Lewis has spoken to Jason in jail.

  Then I start to scold myself for deliberating so much and just man up. There’s no way I’m going to come all the way here only to cower and run back to Newport. I’m done being that kind of guy. I have to face my past.

  Blowing out a long breath, I finally take the steps up to his porch. The door opens before I get the chance to knock. I swallow down the huge lump that’s lodged in my throat, as I look into the grey eyes of the man I’d partially hurt two years ago.

  Lewis isn’t that different from the last time I’d seen him. He still has patches of grey hair on both sides of his head, peeking through his dark strands, only now there’s a scar on the left side of his forehead and he appears chunkier and more intimidating.

  “Um…” I fumble for words.

  “I saw you out there,” he says.

  “I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure what to say so I thought maybe I shouldn’t—”

  “It’s good you changed your mind then,” he cuts me off.

  After a pause, he steps aside and opens the door further. “Come in, Mitchel.”

  I inhale and exhale quietly as I make those few steps inside his house. It’s not as different from Grams’. You walk into the living room, the kitchen and dining’s off to the side and there’s a passage leading to the bedrooms.

  “Have a seat,” he offers, his voice is calm.

  Ambling over to the espresso-colored leather couch, I take my time sitting down so as not to seem too jittery.

  “Care for anything to drink?” he asks.

  “No thank you, sir,” I mutter.

  Lewis sits down in the armchair and clasps his hands, studying me. “Still so polite,” he says lowly.

  Unable to hold it back any longer, I blurt out, “I’m so sorry about that night. I was angry at my dad, I’d been drinking, and I just…snapped.”

  He lifts his head slowly and blows out a gush of air. “That’s just it, Mitchel. I don’t understand why you of all people hit me. Honestly, I expected Jason to do what he did. He was always a troubled kid. I don’t get why you were even friends with him to begin with.”

  “Because everyone else gave up on him, and I…” I trail as I consider my words. “I know what it’s like for him, not feeling like he’s good enough. His parents abandoned him. He got kicked off the baseball team, and I just wanted to be his friend.”

  “But, Mitchel, even though you didn’t have your parents growing up, you still had Annie. She did a wonderful job raising you. Your life is so different from Jason’s.”

  “If we’re so different then I wouldn’t have hit you,” I tell him, my tone sharp.

  Lewis eyes the rug and clasps his knuckles. His forehead wrinkles in deep thought.

  “I went to see Jason two days ago,” he says.

  I straighten, surprised by this news. “You did?”

  He nods. “Yeah, and let me tell you, he’s certainly changed. But there’s one thing he said that had me amazed.”

  “What’s that?”

  Meeting my gaze, the corners of his mouth turn up slightly. “He told me not to blame you, said you were a good friend and that what happened was his fault. Not yours.”

  “He…” I’m almost out of breath, hearing that. Jason cursed me the day he was sentenced. Said I was a pussy and I should’ve finished off Lewis. “He said that?” I confirm.

  “He did. And it’s true. That night when you hit me, I was disappointed because I knew you were better than that and I felt sad for Annie. But I also knew something must have gone wrong for you, because after Jason nearly killed me, I could hear you next to me when he took off. And I knew you were still good.”

  “Lewis, I’m so sorry—”

  “This isn’t about that, Mitchel. The reason why I wanted to see you is because I know you must have been disappointed in yourself all these years, and that you felt like you broke your grams’ heart. You didn’t.”

  I suck in a deep breath and look down at my hands, trying to remain tough. “I’m sure I did.”

  “No, you didn’t son. Annie came to see me when I was in the hospital. My wife said she was there until she fell sick and passed away.”

  My eyes expand. “What? She…she visited you?”

  “Grace said she was there apologizing, telling her that you were a good boy. That you were only sad in your heart and made a terrible mistake.”

  I shake my head in dismay. “That definitely sounds like something my grams would do.”

  “She did it because she loves you, and I just couldn’t be mad at you after hearing that, Mitchel.”

  There’s another pause between us before he stands up and pats my shoulder.

  I stand as well.

  Lewis shakes my hand and mutters, “That’s really why I wanted to see you, Mitchel. To let you know there’s no reason to hold on to guilt anymore.”

  “Thank you, sir. This…helps a lot.”

  He walks me to the door. “Also, I met your father. He seems like he wants to make amends, so if you’re planning on staying in Haxtun for some time, then I suggest working things out with him. It takes time but at least try.”

  As he opens the door, I step out on the porch and look at Lewis from sideways. “I’m not staying after tomorrow. There’s nothing to work on with my dad.”

  An unsatisfied expression appears on his face. “Well, that’s too bad.” He peers down for a second before looking up to meet my gaze again, saying, “Thanks again for coming by. All the best with whatever decisions you make.”

  “Thank you, sir.”

  I walk away from Lewis Harrison’s house feeling contented with that part of my life. Meeting him has made me realized that the past needs to stay in the past, and that I have a bright future to look forward to, especially if I have a girl like Reign in it.

  When I get back to Grams house I take out my cellphone to give Reign a call, wanting to let her know I’ve met with Lewis and that I’m content to move on now. Only as I step inside, Dad is on the couch waiting for me.

  “Why are you still here?” I hiss.

  He springs to his feet. “I’m not going anywhere, Mitch. We need to talk.”

  “I already told you there’s nothing to talk about. Just leave. It’s what you’re good at, anyway.”

  “You know,” he drops his hands on his hips. “You have some nerve coming down on me when you’ve been in juvie,” he snaps.

  “Oh,” I let out a sarcastic laugh. “So you wanna play that game now? Of who’s messed up the most? Well, maybe you should consider the fact that if I had a good father figure in my life then I probably wouldn’t have ended up there.”

  He clamps his mouth
shut and twists it from side to side, fuming. After a moment he says in a softer tone, “I’m sorry. I should have been there for you.”

  I scoff, “You should have done a lot of things. You should have fought your disease a long time ago, if not for Grams then for me. And you think just because you’re sober now we’re gonna be all cool as a cucumber, it doesn’t work like that. It’s been years and years of hurt, and I’m sorry, but I can’t forgive you in just one day.”

  Lewis could. So, does that make me a hypocrite?

  Heading down the hallway towards my room at the back of the house, Dad mutters, “Please don’t leave again, Mitch. We really need to fix this.”

  I stop midstride and mutter over my shoulder, “I have to go back. There’s someone waiting for me, someone I know will never treat me the way you did.”

  “It’s not only me that needs your forgiveness, Mitch,” he says as I start to walk away again. When I don’t stop he calls out, “Your mother wants to see you!”

  Thirty-Four

  Reign

  I CAN’T JOG for five minutes straight without thinking about Micah. He hasn’t called to let me know he’s arrived in Haxtun much less sent me a text. It’s Saturday now, and still there’s no word from him. I wonder what’s going on.

  After another ten minutes I turn and head back to my house. That was a flimsy workout. I didn’t even break a sweat. But it’s hard running without Micah now.

  Dad’s in the kitchen making breakfast when I walk through the arched doorway.

  “Mom’s not up yet?” I ask, slumping over the island.

  “She’s sleeping in today,” he mutters, not looking back at me.

  I pace over to him at the stove, asking, “Is she okay?”

  He shrugs. “She’s fine, just wanted to stay out of Dean’s way while he and his designer make decisions about the restaurant. And she’s trying to think of her next step, you know?”

  “Oh, I was thinking maybe I shouldn’t go to work there anymore, since she sold it.”

  “Nonsense,” he retorts, turning off the stove. Dad scrapes out two big pancakes, handing one of the plates to me. “You should go, work until you leave for your trip at least. Dean’s gonna close down for a week or two to make changes he says, so no need to stop before then.”

  I bob my head slowly and turn my attention to the pancakes. “Looks good,” I say, walking over to the table to sit down.

  “Cranberries inside,” he chuckles, “Your favorite kind.” He didn’t get it wrong.

  “Thanks, Daddy.” I pour a glass of orange juice for us both before cutting into the juicy pancake waiting to enter my stomach.

  “So, is Mom gonna open a smaller restaurant?” I ask as he takes a bite of his own.

  Dad swallows what’s in his mouth before answering, “I don’t think so. She doesn’t have the love for it anymore. You know, I think she was happier working at that youth center in Providence.”

  “Hmm…maybe she should consider doing that again.”

  “Maybe,” he mutters and drinks some of his juice. Setting the glass down next to his plate, he switches the conversation to me. “So, how are things with you and Micah? Why’d he have to leave, anyway?”

  “Oh, um…” I drink my juice before I answer truthfully, because my parents are going to find out sooner or later. “Dad, Micah’s been in juvie.”

  His eyes widen as he peers up at me. “What?”

  “It was an accident, something that he’s completely sorry for, and the guy involved asked to see him so that’s why he went home, to apologize face to face.”

  “Well…” Dad rests both hands on the table, his hazel eyes piercing mine. “I can’t say I’m okay with you dating him after hearing this.”

  “Dad, please don’t be upset,” I implore, looking at him dolefully. “It was an accident, a terrible mistake, and Micah’s making up for it.”

  Glancing at his plate, he pinches his elongated nose, exhales deeply, and then looks up at me. “You’re a smart girl, and I know you wouldn’t keep someone in your life that wasn’t good for you so, I trust that you’re making the right decision where Micah’s concerned. But, promise if anything goes wrong you’ll back out of it; that you’ll let me know if there’s trouble.”

  “Dad,” I smile at him. “It’s okay. I’m safe with him.”

  He nods, taking my word for it. “If you say so, Reign.”

  After breakfast, I shower and get dressed. I peek in on Mom before leaving for work. The drapes are drawn and the room’s dark. She’s cuddled up under the covers, sleeping peacefully. I decide to leave her be and head out.

  Pulling into the parking lot at Captain’s Choice, I decide to stop worrying so much and give Micah a call. The reason I didn’t sooner is because I wanted him to focus on why he was there and have room to breathe without me bothering him.

  He answers on the third ring. “Hey, babe.”

  My heart begins to thump because as pathetic as it might be, I’ve missed him in the past few hours he’s been away from me. “Hey,” I manage to say. “You didn’t call.”

  Micah sucks in air before speaking again. “I’m sorry, it completely slipped me.”

  “Oh…” That kinda hurts; sounds like he’s forgetting about me already. “It’s okay,” I tell him. “How’d it go with Lewis?”

  “It went fine, better than I’d expected. But something else has happened.”

  I perk up in front of the steering, curious. “What happened?”

  “Well, for one, my dad’s been living at my grandmother’s house and he claims that he’s sober now.”

  “Oh wow,” I mutter. I’m actually happy to hear this. I know deep down that even though Micah’s been hurt by his father dropping in and out of his life, he really wants him there. “That’s good.”

  “Yeah, that’s not the only thing though,” his voice comes out low and he sounds troubled.

  “What else happened?” I ask, hoping he’s all right.

  “My mom wants to see me.”

  “Oh. My. Gosh! Micah...”

  “Yeah, that was my reaction too,” he chuckles flatly. “Guess she’s reached out to my dad.”

  “Well, why now? Why after all these years she finally wants to meet you?” I ask without thinking.

  Micah pauses for a beat before he answers, “I don’t know, Reign.”

  “Are you gonna meet her?” A part of me is selfishly hoping he won’t, because with both parents back in his life, he might decide to hell with Newport and break up with me. My heart’s pounding more than ever now.

  I’m so scared.

  “I don’t know that either,” he says, “I haven’t made up my mind. What do you think?”

  What do I think? I can’t tell him the honest truth, that I want him to yell at them and ask where the hell they were when he was growing up, and that I just want him to come back to me.

  “I…um…I think that decision should be your own,” I manage to say. “Maybe you should take some time to think about it?” I suggest, hoping he’ll come back here while he’s making up his mind.

  “I feel like I shouldn’t leave yet, that I should just meet her and find out why, you know.”

  His words crush any hope I have of seeing him on Sunday. I guess I won’t be picking him up at the transport center tomorrow after all.

  “Oh, okay, so when will you be back then?” I ask, seeming selfish.

  “Probably in a few days, I just want to settle everything here and move on without regrets,” he says.

  I’m still stuck on the word probably. “Okay, well, you let me know then. I actually just pulled up at work so I’ll talk to you later. Call me, okay?”

  “Okay,” he replies, and I suspect he wants to say more but doesn’t. I want to say more too, but I can’t, especially since I’m not sure if he’s even coming back.

  We hang up like that, not saying anything else. I push back the tears threatening to fall, then walk inside the restaurant.

  Dean’s here
with his overly eclectic designer. She’s making suggestions about painting over the light blue interior with more earthy colors like brown or orange. And they want to update the rustic cedar bar to something more modern and funky. My dad built that bar. Ugh! The nerve of them.

  As I walk out on the deck where Aislin is cleaning the tables, I leave them discussing how to replace the aquatic mural on the wall behind the bar.

  Jeez. I’m glad Mom decided to stay away while this is taking place, because it obviously hurts to have someone come in and change everything you worked hard on building. Then again, she sold Captain’s Choice, so there isn’t anything she can do or say.

  “What’s your mom gonna do after summer?” Aislin asks as I take up one of her towels to wipe off the chairs.

  “She’s still making up her mind,” I tell her. “What about you, are you gonna stay and work for Dean?”

  She stops what she’s doing and walks over to the railing. “John is, but not me. Dean rubs me the wrong way. I can’t work for him.”

  I meander over and rest my hands on the railing, peering out at sea. “Yeah, I heard him mention something about hiring new workers, anyway.”

  “Huh,” she scoffs. “What a douche.”

  We stand quiet for a minute before she asks, “Is Micah gone for good? I thought he was gonna work here till August. Is something wrong with him?”

  Her question stirs up the worry again. Suddenly, my tears sting my eyes and I have to glance down at my fingers to keep her from noticing how scared I am of the fact that he might not come back to Newport. Ever.

  “Um…he just had something to take care of in his hometown,” I mutter. “He’ll be back soon.”

  When I manage to suppress the tears, I look up at her. Aislin twists her mouth and bobs her head slowly, studying my face.

  A moment later her dark red lips coil into a smile and her brown eyes light up.

  “Your birthday’s coming up, right? I almost forgot. I heard Clark going over ideas for your cake with your mom. I think you’ll love it.”

  I feign a smile. “I’m sure I will. They did a great job last time.”