Merman's Love (Merman's Kiss, Book 4)

by Dee J. Stone

  We enter the cave that is Damarian’s home and settle down at the table while Damarian puts Zarya to bed. Kiandra swims to a corner of the room, to the pile of oyster shells where she keeps leftover fish. She looks up at her husband and shakes her head.

  “The Guards are gathering food for the colonies,” he tells her. “We shall have plenty in the morning.” He pats Syndin’s head. “It was difficult to hunt due to the war. You will be all right until the morning?”

  “Yes, Father.”

  “Hopefully, it won’t be long until things are back to normal,” I say.

  “Yes.” Kiandra nods. She turns to Syd and Syndin, who look like they’re about to pass out from fatigue. “It is time you head to bed, my darlings.”

  Syren kisses the top of their heads and wishes them a good night. Damarian reaches for my hand. “Perhaps it is wise we sleep as well.”

  I nod. I can barely keep my head up.

  We wish his parents and Doria good night, then make our way to his room. The familiar large oyster shell with seaweed greets me, and for the first time in a while, I feel like I can finally be at peace. At least, somewhat in peace. There are still so many worries on my head.

  Damarian slips inside the shell, then reaches for me, tucking me close to his body. He pulls the seaweed up to my chin. It’s not cold, but I understand his gesture—he wants to take care of me, to show me how much he loves me. It’s been a while since we’ve been this close. We’ve made out in my head, and while the memories are fresh, they weren’t real.

  I hook my arms around his neck and press myself closer to him, sighing at the amazing feeling. I feel so protected and loved and like nothing bad can befall me.

  “It is all right,” he whispers in my ear, his warm breath tickling me cheek. “We have nothing to fear any longer.” His lips sweep against my temple.

  “I’m just worried about my brother and sister.”

  “I understand. But fret not, for Callen will find them.” He cups my cheek. “We will help them, my love. I shall do all I can.”

  I rest my forehead against his. “Thanks. I also can’t stop thinking about my dad, Sheila, and Jace. I keep replaying it all from the very beginning, wondering if I could have done something to prevent all of this.” I shake my head. “Before their sea serpent sides took over, they were such good people.”

  He rubs my back. “I do not believe we could have prevented it. It was their destiny to return to their true forms.”

  He’s right. Maybe it will take a while for me to make peace with it.

  “I am sorry you had no choice but to kill your father, my love. It must have been difficult.”

  My whole body feels like a block of wood. “It was. I keep seeing his human eyes right before he died. How he told me not to give up fighting the sea serpents until we won. His last message was telling me how much he loved me.” I push some hair out of Damarian’s eyes. “But when he hurt Zarya, all I could think about was protecting her, and I didn’t think twice about attacking my dad. You are my family, Damarian. All of you.”

  He lays my head on his chest and holds me tight. We remain like this for a little bit, before Damarian draws back and takes my hand. “I am glad we have relinquished the throne. While we may not be as powerful as when I had the crown, and our bond may not be as strong, I did not feel comfortable as ruler.”

  “That’s okay. We’re strong enough without you on the throne. If you think you were uncomfortable, imagine how I felt.” I stroke his cheek. “Though I don’t know what you’re talking about—you were such a natural.”

  His eyebrows shoot up. “I was?”

  “Yeah. The way you commanded everyone, the respect they had for you. The confidence you had.” I playfully punch his shoulder. “You would have made an awesome king.”

  His expression changes. “But it is not what I wish.” His arms come around me. “My only wish is to be with you.” He moves his lips toward mine as though he wants to kiss me, but he sweeps them down my neck instead.

  I put my fingers on his lips. “Damarian…”

  “Are you not exhausted?”

  “Too exhausted for making out? Never.” I grab his shoulders and spin us around so that I’m lying on top of him. I stare down at him, brushing some more hair out of his eyes. “Damarian…”

  He caresses my cheek. “It is all right to feel happy, my sweet Cassie. Though we have lost many, their deaths would be in vain if we forever mourn them.”

  “I know. I guess it’s going to take some time for me to come to terms with everything.”

  “I as well.”

  I lean closer until my lips are a few inches from his. Every part of me yearns to feel his soft lips against mine, to taste him and soak up the love he has for me. To feel him for real. But I want this to be special, to savor every single second.

  His body trembles from beneath me, and I can hear how fast his heart is beating. His gills expand and contract laboriously, as though he may die if my lips don’t make contact with him in the next ten seconds. I bring my hand to his waist, to where his skin meets his tail, and slowly tiptoe my fingers upward. His breathing grows even more labored and his eyes shut tight. He releases a frustrated, impatient groan.

  My fingers continue their gradual trek and come to a halt on his chest. His hand closes over mine and flattens it over the hard muscle. “Cassie,” he murmurs, his eyes still closed.

  I lean forward so that my lips are only a few inches from his ear. My hair falls over my shoulder, making a curtain around him. A curtain of love. “Yes?” I whisper.

  “You…” he breathes. “This is painful.”

  “Yeah, maybe. But the end result will be awesome.”

  From the sound of his next groan, he doesn’t agree.

  I sweep my lips from his ear to the other side of his face. His mouth opens, eagerly seeking mine. Deciding to put him out of his misery, I gently press my lips to his. His hands grip my waist as he yanks me closer to his body, and his mouth devours mine. He’s putting quite a bit of pressure on my waist, his hold desperate and fervent, but he’s not hurting me. We both should have passed out from exhaustion minutes ago, but it’s like we’ve been zapped with renewed energy. We tumble over each other as our kisses grow more intense, more passionate. Everything comes out, the fear and anxiety we felt throughout the whole battle, the relief that it’s over, the hope that we can finally put all of this behind us and live our lives. Our love is so profound I feel it wrapping around me like a cocoon.

  The only reason I realize we’ve toppled out of the shell is because Damarian jerks up and touches my face, asking if I’m okay. I grab my sides as I double over, laughing my brains out. I don’t know what it is, but I’m laughing as though I haven’t laughed in years. Maybe I’m finally letting everything go. Maybe I’m finally ready to make peace with everything. I mean, I still have a long way to go and there’s still so much I’m worried about, but for the first time in a really long time, I feel like I can be happy.

  Damarian joins in the laugher. Then he gathers me in his arms and crawls back into bed. “I believe you are beyond exhausted, my love.”

  I cover my face as I try to stop the last laughs. “You might be right.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  My eyes open to darkness. It takes a few seconds for me to realize where I am—in Damarian’s shell, nestled in his arms. Everything comes back to me, the war, our victory, the many lives that were lost.

  My make out session with Damarian only a few hours ago made me feel like I can put it all behind me and start to live, but now that the passion has worn off, I don’t feel the same way. Everything comes crashing down on me—little Zarya and her damaged fin, Ruthie and Bobby who are still sea serpents and whom I desperately want to help, the Ruby colony whose home was destroyed.

  Carefully, I wiggle out of Damarian’s arms and leave his room. The entire cave is quiet, which is good because it means no one else is having problems sleeping. I swim through the short tunnel towar
d the exit of the cave, hoping to go for a short swim and clear my head, but I stop dead in my tracks. Someone is sitting on the floor at the exit. At first I think it’s Kiandra, but then I realize it’s Doria. So much for thinking I’m the only one who can’t sleep.

  I swim over and settle down near her. “Hey.”

  She turns her head, and that’s when I see the anguished expression on her face. Her eyes, though deep blue like always, look haunted.

  Reaching for her hand, I ask, “What’s wrong?”

  She blinks a few times, and if it was possible to have tears in the ocean, hers would surge down her cheeks. The sadness leaping off every part of her body can swallow up this entire cave.

  I squeeze her hand. “Doria, are you okay?”

  The sorrow in her eyes seems to magnify by a hundred. “I am well, thank you.” Her voice shakes. Even the most idiotic person on the world would know she’s lying.

  “Please, you can talk to me. What’s going on?”

  She opens her mouth to respond, but it seems like the words get stuck in her throat. I study her to try to figure out what can possibly be wrong. I don’t think it’s Zarya—while Doria’s very hurt by what happened to her little sister, I doubt she’d be this torn up about it. We won the war against the sea serpents, so she can’t be upset by that. That leaves only one option. “It’s Kytero, isn’t it?”

  She quickly shakes her head. “It is selfish of me to have such feelings. Not with Zarya in her current state…not with the many lives that have been lost.”

  I scoot closer to her and take her in my arms. “It’s okay to be sad. Don’t feel guilty about it. What happened to Kytero?”

  Her body quakes as she wraps her arms around me, hugging me so tight I can hardly breathe. “He is to stand trial.” She lifts her head. “All the rebels will stand trial. King Kiander and Queen Flora, along with many members of the Guard, including my father, will pass judgment on them.”

  I take both her hands. “But Kytero wasn’t part of the rebels. In fact, he helped us. Surely the king and queen will pardon him.”

  “But his family followed them…I do not know. I worry so.”

  “I understand how worried you are. But Kiander and Flora are very fair rulers. I know they’ll see that Kytero is innocent.”

  She nods, though her eyes hold only uncertainty. I move even closer to her and lay my head on her shoulder. “It’ll be okay. You’ll see.”

  I feel her nod against my head. She tightens her grip on my hand, and we remain like this for a little bit. Until a sudden thought enters my head and I pull away from her. “Doria…”

  “Yes?”

  “Does this mean I’ll have to stand trial, too?”

  I brought the sea serpents into the ocean. Because of me, so many lives have been lost.

  Doria bites her bottom lip, looking regretful.

  “I will, won’t I?”

  She nods. “Damarian did not wish to inform you, but yes, it is only fair that you stand trial as well.” She squeezes my hand. “But do not fear. You will be found innocent.”

  “I’m not so sure about that.” Even though Kiander and Flora are fair rulers, they need to do what’s right for their people. I’m a danger to them—even though the sea serpents are gone, I am still human and I am required to travel back and forth between land and sea. That puts all the merpeople’s lives at risk. Maybe the king and queen will decide to turn me back to a human—permanently—and ban me from the ocean. That means Damarian and I could never be together. That means Damarian would be left without a mate and would be single for the rest of his life.

  Doria’s eyes circle my face. “I have troubled you. I apologize, Cassie. That was not my intention.”

  I shake my head. “I’m being selfish. We’re talking about you and Kytero.”

  “You are my sister, Cassie. You do not constantly need to behave pleasantly before me. If you wish to be selfish, by all means, be selfish.”

  I give her a small smile. “I don’t exactly know how to do the sister thing. I never had a sister—I mean…” Ruthie’s adorable face flashes before my eyes. “And here I go being selfish again,” I mutter.

  She sandwiches my hand between hers. “Are your brother and sister still concealing themselves?”

  “Yeah. At least, we think they are. Who knows where they can be?” Is it possible they fled to land? Does that mean they shifted back to humans? Where would they go? Both their parents are dead.

  She envelops me in a hug. “I apologize for causing you to worry again.”

  “Thanks.” I pull out of the hug and give her another smile. “I think I’ll head back to bed. Kytero will be in your arms tomorrow night. Trust me.”

  She returns the smile, though it doesn’t reach her eyes.

  “Try to get some sleep,” I tell her before making my way back to Damarian’s room. I float near him, watching him sleep. He’s on his side in the oyster shell, his hands bent before him as though I’m still tucked close to his body. He looks at peace, though there’s a crease between his eyebrows. Doria’s words slide into my head. My hearing. Will I have it tomorrow? Why has Damarian kept it from me?

  I lift some of the seaweed and slip into the bed as quietly as possible. I curse under my breath when he shifts over and opens his eyes, staring straight at me. “Cassie?” he asks sleepily.

  “Sorry I woke you.”

  He shifts again until his entire body faces me. He brings his hand to my cheek and gently rubs it with the back of his fingers. “I see in your eyes that something distresses you.”

  It’s on the tip of my tongue to demand why he didn’t tell me about the hearing, but I press my lips together. I don’t want to start a fight, not when the war is over and we can finally start trying to live again. But then again, we need to have open communication, and I should tell him if something is bothering me.

  But maybe I should bring it up later. I’m worried we’d argue, and that’s the last thing I want.

  “It’s just…I’ve been thinking about the Ruby colony. I can’t help but feel responsible for the destruction. They have nowhere to live, and it’s all my fault.”

  “It is not, my love. The sea serpents are at fault.”

  “I know, but…”

  He bends forward and gives me a sweet kiss. “Kiander and Flora will find a suitable location for them. Do not fret, my Cassie.”

  I sit up. “Can we go there?”

  He sits up, too, his eyes studying my face. “You wish to travel to the Ruby colony?”

  “I…I don’t know what it is. But I feel like I need to see it.”

  His forehead is wrinkled, but he says, “If that is your wish. Now?”

  I nod.

  He takes my hand, and the two of us slip out of his bed and swim out of the room. Doria is no longer nestled on the floor near the exit of the cave. I hope she manages to get at least a few hours of sleep. The conversation she and I had spins around in my head, about my hearing and the possibility that I may be banned from the ocean. I shove it away because it’s just too much to think about. I have so many other worries on my head, like my siblings and Zarya and Doria. If I let this new issue eat away at my brain, my head will explode.

  Damarian must sense that something is troubling me because he brings our interlocked hands to his mouth and kisses the back of my palm. “Is all well, my love?”

  With a tight throat, I nod. For a few seconds, he and I lock eyes on one another, and I study every part of his face, looking for any hint that he’s worried about my hearing. But it’s impossible to tell because he’s got a lot of worries on his head, too.

  Giving the back of my hand another kiss, he leads us out of the cave. The water is pitch black. I haven’t swum during nighttime in the ocean often, and it causes a shiver to run down my spine. Merpeople can see in the dark, so I’m not nervous I’ll get lost or anything, but the whole area is dead quiet. Not that it was bustling with activity today due to the war and the deaths of so many merpeople, bu
t it feels totally deserted now.

  We leave the Sapphire colony and head toward the Ruby colony. Even though we’re a good distance away, I see the rubble that used to be their homes. A lump the size of the largest fish in the ocean lodges in my throat. Every cell in my body begs for me to turn around and run back home. To the safety of Damarian’s oyster shell. But that’s the thing—the Rubies have no homes. They don’t have shells to run to. I don’t know what I hope to accomplish here, but I need to try.

  There is no longer an entrance to the colony, and I’m not sure exactly when we actually enter. But when we come face to face with members of the Guard, I know we’re at the entrance.

  Two of them swim toward us. “State your reason for traveling to the Ruby colony,” the tall Violet demands. When his eyes move to me, they fill with hostility. It causes me to falter back a little. He focuses his gaze on Damarian.

  “My mate and I would like to examine the area,” Damarian says, using his “king” voice that I would find beyond sexy in another time and place.

  “By the order of King Kiander and Queen Flora, no one is to enter.” He folds his arms over his chest and looks at Damarian only.

  “Please,” I say. “I need to go in.” I look from one to the other, the pleading in my voice practically choking me. “I promise we won’t do anything. I just need to go in.”

  “As I have stated, no one is to enter the Ruby colony.” He’s still not looking at me, though the venom directed at me is giving me mental poisoning. I have no idea who he is and why he’s acting this way toward me. But I guess it’s obvious—he must hate me for bringing the sea serpents into the ocean and causing so much destruction and death.

  Seeing I won’t get through to him, I put my attention on the Sapphire Guard. “Just a few minutes. Please, I’m begging you with everything I have.”

  He glances at the Violet, who is just staring straight ahead at nothing. It looks like he doesn’t know what he should do. Finally after a few seconds, he sighs and says, “All right, but the colony is not stable. It is dangerous. We shall accompany you.”