Feline Good

by Lana Kole

  A knocking sound filtered in through the pantry, but not on the door leading into her hiding place. No, the bastard was playing with her, baiting her, tapping his knuckles against the polished wood of her bar as if he had all the time in the world.

  Maya swallowed her hesitation with a healthy dose of rage, and drew up her courage, steeling her spine on a deep inhale. Taking care to remain silent, she left her hiding space, stalking up to the crack between the frame and the swing door. Waiting... waiting… until, yes, the light creeping in was eclipsed by a man’s shadow. She shoved her shoulder into the door, the motion jarring her as the guy stumbled from the force of the old wood hitting him. A curse exploded from him as she followed through, kicking the back of his knee and sending him crashing to the floor. Without sparing the man another thought, she cranked the bat back beside her head and swung it to the side, hitting a home run as the bastard fell forward with a thud. She grimaced at the ugly sound of the aluminum bat colliding with his head before she saw his weapon. Thankfully, it wasn’t a gun, but a… a fucking short sword? And a strangely curved one at that, like a short C shape stuck on a hilt. Whatever. She grabbed it, figuring it would make a better weapon than her blunt, now dented, bat.

  Stepping around the unconscious man, she started forward, planning to make a mad dash for the stairs. Instead, another man, this one even taller than the first, turned the corner of the hallway, backing her up behind the bar.

  “Don’t try to run. We have some questions for you. Now, be a good little girl, and come with us.” He ambled toward her with leisurely steps, barely sparing a glance for his partner she’d knocked out. Sheer stubbornness, pride, and willpower fueled her as she stood to face the intruder head on, refusing to go down without a fight. Maya was tiny compared to the giant, her measly five-foot-two-inch vantage point giving her a nice view of the underside of his chin. Knowing the size difference would be a challenge, even with her training, she calculated how to lull the intruder into a false sense of complacency.

  Playing the submissive captive while yet another giant filed in behind him, she dropped her shoulders and with her head hanging forward, she let the weapon go limp in her hand. Just as he reached for her, she tightened her grip on the handle of the short sword and swung it up, gritting her teeth as, with a small cry, she sliced deep into his arm like a hot knife through butter.

  He yelled out, clamping his opposite hand to the injury, and she turned away from them, using the upturned crate as a launching pad to slide across the bar and land on the opposite side. The third man, tall, blond, and scary, wielded a matching short sword as he prowled forward, body tensed and ready to lunge at any second, looking every bit the predator stalking its prey. Fortunately, bar stools and low tables separated them.

  Unfortunately, however, the stairs leading to her apartment, and by default her cell phone, were behind him.

  As he stalked forward, Maya considered her options. She didn’t know what the hell these guys wanted, but it obviously wasn’t the cash in the safe. Besides, what kind of robbers carried fucking swords? They came prepared though, equipped with weapons, no matter how weird said weapons seemed, and a small crew. Maya still didn’t know if there was a fourth, or hell, maybe even a fifth or sixth intruder that she didn’t know about.

  Fuck.

  This whole situation was shit. Like she needed another reason to hate Valentine’s Day? Maya would be the one to end it on a bang. And not the good kind.

  Motion and a curse caught her attention, and she jerked her gaze to the man she’d cut. She found him in the process of ruining one of her dish towels by wrapping it around his wound. She narrowed her eyes at the disrespect. Really? They break into her bar, and then have the audacity to ruin her favorite, handmade towel?

  Assholes.

  At least he was occupied, though, which meant she just had this burly bastard to get past.

  The guy was huge, which she hoped meant he was slow. A big assumption, she knew, but she didn’t have a lot of choices. Even if she chose to run for the front door, she didn’t think there would be enough time to unlock all three deadbolts on the door. At that point, her back would be turned and Maya feared what would happen if the thick fucker got his arms around her. He’d probably squeeze until she passed out, and that was the last thing she wanted.

  That left only one option. Eyeing the size of the big bastard, Maya knew it would be impossible to best him head on. With her tiny stature, only the element of surprise would work in her favor, and she could think of only one way to accomplish that.

  A curse slipped from her lips, and she allowed her shoulders to slump. Purposefully, Maya let her lips quiver, as if overtaken by an emotion— fear, maybe, or sadness, even helplessness.

  Big and Burly glared at her, but seemed to relax a bit as he motioned her forward with the crook of a finger, completely falling for her ruse. “Come now, I only have questions. But put the khopesh aside.”

  The what?

  Maya dropped eye contact, focusing on his cheekbones and shoulders instead, showing weakness with her body language. Holding the hilt of the blade down with her right hand, she drew closer before laying it on a nearby table. Only about five feet separated them now.

  He nodded in approval of her actions and stepped forward, intending to detain her. Instead, just when he got within arm’s reach, she acted on an old tip from Uncle Malak. Fight dirty. Maya did just that, grabbing the back of the nearest chair and swinging sideways. The legs and seat of the chair broke apart as it crashed against his body, basically disintegrating in her hands.

  As he stumbled from the hit, she quickly grabbed the hilt of the blade she’d surrendered, and charged him with it held at the ready. Lashing out first with a kick to his gut, Maya then swiped across his chest with the blade. A slice of red split the front of his dark gray shirt, and she winced at the ease with which it opened his skin. He hissed, cursing under his breath as he gripped the wound and stumbled back. While he fell, she rushed for the stairs, knowing her phone was still her best bet for survival. Maya didn’t glance back as she took off, darting around the last few tables before her feet hit the first steps. Hope bloomed, her pounding footsteps echoing around the bar as she ran for her life.

  It only took a split second for her hope to wither. Midway up the stairs, rough fingers curled around her ankle, and yanked her away from her chance at freedom. Wood rushed up into her line of vision as the sword tumbled from her grip, teetering on the edge of the stairs, before falling out of sight to land on the bar floor below. Maya didn’t catch herself in time, her hands scrambling for purchase on the old wood as her chin banged on the edge of a stair. Her teeth clenched painfully on her tongue, blood welling and dripping from her mouth when she yelled out.

  Suddenly desperate, as if the twisted situation was just now registering, a sick pit opened in her stomach, and she kicked and fought with everything she had. The heel of her black boot made contact with the grabby man’s nose, and she silently gloated at the sickening crunch. It was the guy whose arm she’d sliced open behind the bar.

  “You stupid bitch!” When he spoke in his harsh tone, hissing at the pain, blood splattered the leg of her pants. She tried to scramble out of reach, gripping the stairs to haul herself up, but he simply jerked her ankle back. As he pulled her down the stairs, the other intruders joined him in taming her flailing legs and swinging fists. They each grabbed a limb, and Maya knew defeat when she saw it, felt it. She was outnumbered, outmuscled… and losing steam, fast.

  Fuck!

  Maya tried to beat back the panic, the hopelessness that threatened to overwhelm her, but dread covered her like a dense fog as they deposited and held her down on one of her own damned bar chairs. Her chest rose and fell with her frantic breaths, belying the calm exterior she tried to portray.

  Frustration getting the best of her, she blurted out a furious, “What the fuck do you want?” Judging from her last glimpse of the guy’s furious face and bloody, broken nose… whatever it
was, it wasn’t going to be pretty.

  One of the goons produced rope, and she realized this entire thing was premeditated. They remained silent as they wrapped her up tight in the restraint, securing her arms to her sides. Refusing to answer her question, they studied her as she struggled in the taut confinement.

  Sporting his new nose job, the main man met her gaze, and the fury she saw there sent a shiver down her spine. The next words he spoke chased away her fear in favor of confusion.

  “Where is it?” The calm tone he used was at odds with the emotion sparking in his brown eyes. Big-n-Burly jerked his hand haphazardly around on her bar top while keeping a wary eye on her, producing a rag and handing it to the leader to clean his face with.

  Maya glared, before a truly terrifying thought crossed her mind. She hoped, prayed, pleaded with anyone listening that these men wouldn’t stumble across her cats. Surely they weren’t sick enough bastards to hurt her animals, right? She spoke hurriedly, hoping to distract them from her apartment. “If you’re looking for the safe, it’s in my office. I did the bank run this morning, though, so there’s not a lot of cash.” Don’t go upstairs.

  Big-n-Burly disappeared down the hallway. At the leader’s dry look, she rubbed her face against her shoulder to wipe away the drop of sweat inching its way down her cheek. Annoyance broke through in her tone. “I don’t fucking know what else you could want.”

  He must have had the last of her attitude. Yes, Maya knew she could annoy the fuck out of someone, but this was her bar, by god. Hardly her fault she couldn’t hold her tongue when these fuckers were looting it, if the sounds of rummaging that trailed from her office were any indication.

  As the leader’s meaty fist reeled back, she still glared, refusing to show him the terror that sliced through her like a knife. One hit from this big motherfucker, and Maya feared she’d be lights out… if not fucking dead. Even through the panic, she could still recognize how cliché this whole situation was.

  I cannot believe I’m such a fucking damsel-in-distress right now. All I need is a damned prince to swoop in and save me and it’d be a total fairy tale. Although, I wouldn’t complain if someone showed up to save my damselly ass right about now.

  Before he even had a chance to bring his fist down, the scampering of tiny paws sounded to their right, and she jerked her head toward the stairs to see her cats jetting her way. Their appearance caught her assailant’s attention, and she couldn’t be more grateful for the respite from impending pain, no matter how brief it may be. Maya cringed at the thought of her beloved cats getting hurt, but it was too late, and Fluffy hurled his tiny, black furry body into the leader. Fluffy’s claws slashed at him, and the leader tumbled to the ground as he cried out.

  A blinding flash of light speared through the gaps between the intruder’s limbs as he went rolling across the floor. When he came to a stop, another man was crouched over him, a rumbling growl pouring from snarling lips. Her cat… was nowhere in sight.

  Maya gaped, unable to form an intelligible thought.

  Where did he…

  This time, the new and very naked stranger reared back a fist, but before Maya could have the pleasure of seeing it connect with the leader’s nose, another flash of light distracted her. The thwack of his punch was just background noise to the new show. Maya could not believe her eyes and blinked a few times for good measure. But no, she was almost certain that Muffin, her sweet, fluffy little black cat of fifteen years… morphed, transformed, shifted, whatever, into a man—a real, flesh and blood, male.

  Yup, definitely a dude.

  The very, uhm, large, swinging appendage between his legs confirmed it.

  Making like a fish, her mouth popped open and closed, and a strangled whimper caught in her throat.

  Searching for her last cat, her gaze bounced around the room, needing the sight of a third impossibility to stamp her ticket to the crazy house.

  You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!

  Even her own voice sounded shrill in her head as she watched her sweet, fat Tubbi burst into light, yet another naked male taking his place.

  What the fuck happened to my cats?

  “Oh my god! Did my cats just explode and die?” Tears welled as she imagined Tubbi’s fat little body never cuddling up to her at night again. Those cats had gotten her through everything—her parents’ death, Malak’s death, her fucked-up relationship… Pair that with the trauma and stress of her night, and Maya did the only thing she could in that moment—she cried like a little bitch.

  Her incomprehensible sobs battled for dominance with the sounds of fighting that filled the room. Maya hated crying, but damn, what else was she supposed to do? Those cats were her babies. Tuning it all out, she tried to reason with herself as she pointedly stared at the floor, arms still bound to her sides, held to her chair with rope.

  “It’s fine… this is all a dream. Theo probably slipped me some of his mushrooms and I’m having a bad trip. It’s fine. My cats did not just turn into super hot, naked men in the middle of my bar. It’s fine!” Unintelligible mumbles turned to hopeful assurances to herself, wishes that everything would return to normal again.

  “Well, I can certainly see why she needs protecting.” A dry, accented voice trailed across her senses and rubbed her nerves raw. Jerking her head up, she found the smartass comment belonged to… one of the naked guys.

  Three of them stood before her, one for each of her dead cats, and an honest to god growl slipped past her lips, now pulled back from her teeth.

  “Aw, I love when she gets feisty. It’s cute.”

  Maya gritted her teeth against his condescending tone, and turned her gaze to the new speaker, the tallest of the males before her.

  Ohhhh, shit. I’m in trouble.

  And not only because she remained tied to a chair. As Maya’s gaze traced all the tanned, bared flesh in front of her, she swallowed, and most certainly not in fear.

  The male who’d appeared in place of Tubbi rushed forward, his steps sleek and smooth like… well, like a fucking cat. With chin-length, dark, wavy hair, a scrumptious beard, and a tender look in his amber eyes, Maya felt her tensed muscles relax as he moved closer.

  “Are you all right?” He kept his hushed tone gentle, trying to comfort Maya as he disappeared from her sight, untying the knots behind her. When the rope went limp around her, he walked back in front as he carefully plucked the rope from her arms. After she was free, his hands brushed over her, seeming to check for injuries as he mumbled to himself. “Are you sure you’re okay? I can’t believe you didn’t summon us sooner.” Maya brought herself out of her reverie and knocked his hands away then stood, backing away until all three of them came into view.

  And damn, what a view.

  No, remember the cats.

  With a deep breath, she asked the most important questions of the night.

  “What the fuck is going on? And what the fuck happened to my cats?”

  Chapter Two

  Before any of them could speak, the tallest male, the one previously known as Muffin, strode down the hallway leading to the kitchen and her office. Her eyes caught on the way the globes of his ass flexed with each step and—was she drooling?

  Focus. Need answers.

  Maya looked expectantly at the two remaining, one with a smile on his face and the other a solemn stare.

  She spoke to the one who seemed friendliest first. “Alright, Tubbi, what the hell is going on?”

  He winced, lifting his hands to brush them through his chin-length hair. His arms bunched and rolled with the movement, and she averted her eyes before any of them realized the sight captivated her

  “First of all, that is a horrid name, and I despise you a tiny bit more every time I hear it. Obviously, you can see I am not, in fact, tubby.” His words were punctuated with a sweep of his left hand gesturing to his toned, lean, tanned body.

  “And Muffin, really?” the other yelled from the back, a grunt following the sarcastic question.
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  “Seriously. Do I look really damned fluffy?” the last asked, the deadpan expression on his face at odds with the joking tone he used.

  Her eyebrows rose high as she turned back to the first. “So you are Tubbi? You were my cat?”

  A simple nod answered her, and she quickly continued, the incredulity pouring out of her in a rapid-fire interrogation. “How? Why did you change now? Were my cats always... men? Why were you cats in the first place?”

  Her last question was yelled, her voice ringing around the older, wooden bar walls as her frustration manifested in her tone.

  The man just smiled before sharing a conspiratorial glance with his companion, who used to be her grumpy cat, Fluffy.

  The friendly one turned back to her. “I think before we get into all that, perhaps we should put on some clothes, secure these guys,” he waved a hand at the unconscious men on her bar floor, “and get a drink.”

  “Drinks? I would kill for beer.” Muffin stumbled back into the main bar area, dragging a very unconscious intruder behind him, the same one who’d run off to raid her office.

  Averting her eyes, she slowly backed away to the stairs. “Okay, fine. I have some spare clothes that will probably fit, left over from an ex... if those don’t work, we have a lost and found.” Before they could argue, she sprinted upstairs to her haven and slammed the door shut, throwing the lock just for good measure.

  Not that Maya thought they would come after her, but she just needed a moment to think. Her mind was still trying to wrap itself around the idea that the cats she’d owned for well over a decade were most certainly not cats anymore. Maya paused by the loom, her racing heart calming as she thought of her own odd talent—foresight.

  Woulda been nice to see all this shit coming!

  Maya despised the block that kept her from seeing anything that affected her personally, until after the fact. Stroking the stretched, multi-colored threads, a frustrated huff escaped and she pulled her hand away before she could damage the pattern.