by Karen Deen
“Why don’t we sit and eat the lunch we have, and chat. Please tell me everything you feel that’s holding you back. I need to know it all.” I hold her with my gaze. I’m here to listen for as long as it takes.
“Grant, this is crazy, we hardly know each other. All you need to know is that I can’t do a relationship. It was very kind of you to bring me lunch and I appreciate it. I’m sure you have work you need to get back to, so I don’t mind if you head back to the office.” She’s trying really hard to put on her best sassy voice, but it just isn’t cutting it right now.
“I am the boss, the office will survive without me. There is no place I would rather be right now, than here with you, having lunch. Pick your lunch, chicken or beef? You already told me you were starving so we’re eating, you’re talking and I’m listening.”
I can tell two things. One, I pissed her off with my statement. Two, she is so hungry from the smell of lunch that she’s prepared to battle through just to get a burrito.
“I would love the chicken one, thank you. But when we’re done you can be on your way. I have work to do so I’ll eat in my office. I appreciate the lunch and the apology. I just think it is better for us to go about our day before our verbal sparring reaches the heights of last night.” I can tell it’s not what Zara really wants, because she’s unable to look me in the eye
Unsure how to proceed, I stand there taking in her body language. Normally I would never back down on what I want. It’s just not in my nature, but Zara’s different. Everything I normally do or feel, seems to be thrown out the window with this woman.
“Zara, I know you want more than shutting this down. I won’t push today. Just know that I don’t give up easily. We will be having this discussion. Very soon. Nothing you say will be a big enough reason to stop me from wanting to get to know you. So, take your lunch and enjoy it. Think of me while you’re eating it and get ready for the journey we are about to travel.” I lean forward, inches from her face. “A journey that’s going to end with you in my arms and you wanting to be no place else.” Being so close, I take a risk. One I hope I won’t regret. My lips touch her cheek as I gently lay a soft kiss on it. I hear all the air rush from her lungs as a small sigh escapes her mouth, my lips still zinging from the touch. I turn on my heel and head for the door, my heart thumping. I hope to hell I’ve made the right decision.
Stopping at the door, I turn to face Zara who’s tenderly holding her cheek. “See you soon, Zara. Keep visiting me in my dreams.” I stare at her while that beautiful pink blush creeps up her cheeks.
Savoring that vision, I then turn and leave the studio.
Knowing I’ll be back, and next time, I won’t take no for an answer in regards to the discussion. Zara’s going to be mine whether she realizes it yet or not.
Zara
My chest is tight.
I feel like I can’t breathe as I watched Grant walk out of the door.
What the hell just happened?
My head runs back over the last thirty minutes and plays over like a movie reel. Starting with the vision of me in my towel. Grant had me hot and bothered and fighting the whole time to stay away from him. My head was telling me to stay strong, my heart was telling me to explore what was building between us. And my libido was screaming at me to drop the towel and say come and take me, hard and fast.
Why did the universe decide to finally have a man cross my path that makes me feel again?
I can’t do this. I can’t lose my concentration on where I need to be.
As much as Grant had me hot and bothered, he also infuriated me. The way he walks out of here telling me he’ll see me soon. I need to make sure that doesn’t happen. I don’t seem to have much power when he’s around.
My sassiness packs up and takes her coffee break. What a traitor that bitch is. The last twenty-four hours has been crazy. Spots of normalcy mixed with a good dose of crazy.
My hand still rests on the cheek Grant kissed. I tried so hard to distance myself from him. Grant just never gave up. When he kissed me, it felt like butterflies were swarming in my stomach and fireworks were going off on my cheek. I’ve never been kissed like that in my life. It was a kiss that held so much tenderness in it.
It let me know if I’d given the slightest sign of permission, Grant would have consumed me.
It doesn’t matter how tired I’m going to be at the end of the day, I’ll definitely be dreaming of that kiss, and where it may have led.
The chime of a message on my cell brings me out of the daydream. It’s Natalie checking in on how my day is going and if there’s any hot gossip to share. I need to put into words what the hell just happened, but I have to try to digest it first. The message, however, pulls me out of the fog. I now only have fifteen minutes before my first class of the afternoon. My stomach growls, reminding me I haven’t eaten.
I can’t even eat my lunch without thinking of Grant. It really is sweet of him turning up with lunch. Although he made out he was in the area, I highly doubt that was the case. Turning up with one of my favorite foods was a big tick in my world. This brings a smile to my face. I’m definitely not a munch-and-crunch girl like Grant described. Yes, I watch what I eat and make sure it is good fuel for my body. It doesn’t mean I don’t eat food with flavor and enjoy a good protein hit. Stuff that crazy idea. The energy I use dancing means I need to refuel my body, a lot.
The alarm on my cell goes off to let me know classes are due to start soon and I need to be ready for the kids when they start filing through the door. I’ve got a busy afternoon with tiny dancers all the way up to my late teenager classes. These are the classes I love to throw myself into. These girls and boys, who are almost men and women, work so hard to perfect their dance. Some of them are even looking to dance professionally after leaving school.
Their dreams are so similar to mine.
There are a few students who have such great potential. I also try to give them skills they need surviving in the industry. I wish I’d had a mentor at the time I was injured. Someone to watch out for me and guide me through the dark times. Teaching my students about the times they get knocked back, or god forbid injured, is just as important as dance technique, if you want to become a well-rounded dancer. If I can make a difference in the life of at least one dancer, then it’s worthwhile.
The strange thing is, in twelve months’ time, I will be competing against some of my students for the spots in the top dance troupes. I know my time’s running out. That’s why this audition is so important to me. The age clock is not on my side anymore.
My afternoon whizzes by as my last class finishes up. As soon as the music ends, my students head for their drink bottles and towels. “Great job tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Keep working on those rises for some of you, and the leaps for others. You all know who you are. Next lesson we will add on the choreography for the next two minutes of dance. You all did great today, thank you and see you next week. I will post the video in the Facebook group, so you can all work on perfecting what we have done so far. Thanks, everyone.” Looking around, I feel proud of the students in the room. Some of them I’ve had since the day I opened the studio. So, to see them progress to this point is very satisfying.
Packing up for the night, I grab my gym bag and head for the door. Securing the lock makes me think of Grant. I’m not sure he’d be too happy with me standing on the street, at this time of night, locking up the studio. I don’t know what makes him think I can’t cope with this. I’ve been doing it for so long and never once had an issue. Mind you, he’s put the thought in my head and now has me looking over my shoulder.
Time to go home and have a long, hot shower and try not to think about him or that kiss.
Chapter Ten
Grant
My afternoon in the office doesn’t do much to take my thoughts off Zara. I know I probably shouldn’t have kissed her cheek, but I couldn’t stop myself. I’d been so close to her, with her mesmerizing scent. It was a beautiful scent of vanill
a with a hint of mango. There’s something about a woman’s scent. It gives you a memory of more than just their looks when you are thinking about them.
Their scent always enters a room before their physical beauty. The combination of both will be forged in my brain forever. I need to get close enough to add her taste to my memory. Zara has totally consumed me, my thoughts never straying far from her. I have to control it and work on my future plan.
This is going to be a challenge. Storming forward, being gung-ho about something I want is generally how I work.
But never before, have I ever wanted someone.
I have to rein it in and take it slow with Zara. Something is holding her back and I need to find out what it is. I could see it in her eyes and sure as hell feel it in her touch, that she wants to take it further but pulls out at the last second. I admire her for that. She’s staying true to herself.
I will work hard to keep my distance.
But I can guarantee it won’t be for long.
They say you know when that one person walks into your life. Up until now I would’ve said that’s a load of shit.
Until Zara.
I knew the moment she opened her beautiful sassy mouth that she was different. It didn’t take long for me to work out that Zara is ‘the one’. The one person who is meant for me. The one person who when I take her in my arms, her body fits perfectly into mine. The one person who is the part of me that’s been missing. The one person who is…mine.
Zara, I’m coming for you and I won’t be stopping until you’re mine.
The afternoon has come and gone, and the office is getting quiet. I should probably stay and get some work done but decide to visit the hospital instead. Speaking to Zach today, he sounded on cloud nine but also exhausted. Emily was in the background trying to convince him to stop worrying about her and go home for a sleep. Zach totally dismissed her. I knew there was no way he was leaving that hospital, or the room for that matter, until it was time to take Emily and Thomas home with him.
“Uncle Grant,” the twins cry as I enter the hospital room. Their smiles are huge. There’s so much love on their faces for Thomas. This poor little boy is going to get smothered with love from the twins whether he needs it or not. They share the love of a large family now. It’s so large it’s bursting at the seams.
I extend my arms to catch them as they race towards me. Bending down, Sophia is the first to reach me and snuggles in. She never ever misses a cuddle with me. I will miss this when she’s grown up and would rather be cuddling a boyfriend instead of her Uncle Grant. Better enjoy my time now with these amazing kids.
Sammy is in my other arm not long after Sophia. The only difference is Sophia’s silent, enjoying the hug. Samuel, however, chats away non-stop. I hope it never changes. I hope he will always enjoy my company and talk to me about anything and everything.
“Thomas is so cool, Uncle Grant. He smiled at us and he grabbed my finger. Mommy said it will be a while before he will be able to play with me but that is okay because I have Sophia, but we can all play when he gets bigger. Do you think he will like to kick the ball with me and ride bikes with me? Maybe we can ride the horses together or build sandcastles in the sandpit. What do you think, Uncle Grant?”
“Whoa, little buddy, slow down. I think your little brother is going to love you both and love to play all sorts of games with you. But I think your Mom is right, you will need to wait until he gets a bit bigger. Do you think you can wait that long, Sammy?” His little eyes peer up at me and you could see he’s thinking hard.
“Yeah, okay, I can wait until next week. Then he can share my toys and we can play.”
I look up to Emily and Zach who are holding their sides trying not to laugh out loud at Sammy’s statements.
“Maybe a little longer than a week, Sammy,” I say, looking down at the twins who are now detangling themselves from me.
“Uncle Grant, did you bring Miss Zara to see Thomas?” Sophia quietly asks.
“No, Soph. What makes you think she would be coming with me?”
“Because Me-Me said you should marry Miss Zara, so I thought she was your girlfriend.” Her innocent eyes look up into mine.
“No, sweetheart. We’re just friends.”
“What the hell happened at the dance studio yesterday? Is there something you would like to share with us, Grant,” Zach probes while hiding a smile.
Emily is cackling now. “Yes, Grant, how well do you know Miss Zara?”
“I just met Zara yesterday when you asked me to pick up Sophia from dancing,” I say, trying to play down the situation so Zach can realize there’s nothing he needs to know. Well, not now anyway.
“Then Miss Zara came to the hospital with us to meet baby Thomas, but she left before she got to see him. She had to come because you didn’t say I could go with Uncle Grant. He opened the door for her just like you do, Daddy. She said she didn’t need it, but I told her Uncle Grant would get in trouble from Gruffy if he didn’t do it.” I stand looking at Sophia. I’m amazed. Where had this confidence come from? I’m happy to see it, but it’s taken me by surprise. Maybe she’s finally feeling settled in her new life. Feeling safe. Safe enough to just be a little girl loving her life. My heart feels so full just watching and listening to her babble like Samuel does.
Zach and Emily give me the look of amusement, my seven-year-old niece having just ratted me out. Then come the look of confusion and intrigue.
“So, Grant… maybe we need to go grab some coffee and leave the kids here with Emily for a minute.” With a stupid smirk, Zach puts his arm around my shoulders.
“Zach, there is nothing you need to worry about. All I can say is that you should be happy with your daughter’s dance teacher. She is very thorough and prepared to go to great lengths to keep Sophia safe.” I try to give Zach the look he needs to back off.
“Grant, I am sure Miss Zara is very thorough and will go to great lengths. Did you get to discover what lengths that was, big brother?” Zach chuckles to himself.
“Zach, stop picking on your brother. I’m sure it was all innocent, wasn’t it, Grant?” Emily grins at me while stroking little Thomas’s cheek.
“Well, let’s just say at the moment, yes, it is innocent. Can I guarantee it will stay innocent? Perhaps not. She’s quite a woman. Not one to take any crap from anyone. What do you know about her?” My initial thoughts were to keep my thoughts to myself but then the desire to find out more won over.
“I knew it! You like her, don’t you, Grant?” Zach looks at me like he’s won the lottery. “Just admit it, this woman has you turning your head, doesn’t she?”
“Zach, for goodness sake, let it go. If Grant wants you to know his business, he will tell you. Why don’t you concentrate on the three children here who’d like your attention?”
“Soph and Sammy, can you take Daddy down to the cafeteria and get Mommy a donut? Maybe Daddy could buy one for you too, if you’re being good.” The kids jump up, cheering and racing to be at Zach’s side.
“Daddy, what kind will we get for Thomas? A chocolate or strawberry donut?” This brings a laugh from all the adults
“Maybe not this time, buddy, he can’t eat real food yet. He can only have Mom’s special milk until he gets bigger.”
“Daddy, what’s Mommy’s special milk?” Sophia’s curious little eyes look up into Zach’s, not letting him move an inch. The look on his face is priceless. I laugh at his reaction and Emily joins in, while Zach tries his hardest to work out what he’s going to say.
“Well, Sophia…Daddy will explain that while he takes you down to get the donuts, won’t you, Zach?” Emily says, fighting to get through the sentence without losing it with laughter.
Zach turns to face his wife and with a look of love, lust and mischief he replies, “Okay, let’s go, kids, wait at the door for me.” He walks over to Emily and places a kiss on her forehead. “You will pay for that, little lady. When you’re healed, you will certainly pay for that and there
will be a spanking involved.” Emily’s cheeks turn bright red and Zach chuckles as he turns and walks out the room. I wouldn’t have expected that from Zach, but then again, he’s found his ‘one’ and that gives him the confidence to let her know how much he loves her every day.
“Sorry about that, Grant, I don’t know where that came from. Your little brother is an amazing, loving, caring man with a strong bit of naughty on the side.” Emily mumbles the last bit.
“Em, it’s okay, you don’t need to be embarrassed. What you two have is beautiful. Don’t tell him, but I am just a little jealous. Finding your partner in life is obviously very powerful from what I have felt.” I look down realizing what I’ve just revealed to Emily.
Emily places her free hand on mine. “Grant, tell me if I am wrong, okay? Zara, she has you in knots, doesn’t she?” I look and smile. “She is your one, isn’t she?”
Emily and I have a special relationship. From the first time I met her, we bonded. I knew I could talk straight with her without coping the stirring crap that would come from my brothers and sisters.
I nod slightly and look into her eyes. “I think she is. I have never felt before what she makes me feel and I don’t even really know her yet. It’s like she’s hit me and knocked my feet out from under me. That is not like me. I am never confused. As you know, my family complains about it all the time.” Emily laughs which makes Thomas stir a little in her arms.
“Don’t be afraid to relax a little and feel it, Grant. If destiny has put her in your universe then there’s a reason for that. Take your time to get to know her but also don’t be afraid to push her a little. I think there is more to Miss Zara than what she shows her students and parents. Maybe she is like you. Has a lot hidden behind that confident outer-shell?” I stand there pondering what Emily’s saying.