The Friend Zone (The Relationship Quo Series Book 2)

by Nicole Strycharz

  “Hey Baby Girl,” I rasped. My voice sounded hoarse and unfamiliar. “You busy?”

  “Just sitting at home with Goliath.”

  I had an image of her in my mind, sitting on her bed Indian style in a fitted t-shirt and baggy ass sleep pants. Her dog, Goliath was a Leonberger and he would be lying with his head on her knee. The one-room apartment she had would be dimly lit and all I wanted to do was appear there, anywhere but here.

  “Can I come over?” I asked.

  “Why? You don’t usually stay the night when you date, and you’re almost a married man, might I add.”

  “Because they were right. 2012 is the end of the world.”

  She laughed and it actually brought a small smile to my lips.

  “You know you don’t have to ask dumb bunny. You have a key.” She said.

  I looked at the dog in the road still watching me and swallowed. “I love you, Chloe.”

  Long pause. “You’re drinking.” She said like it was obvious.

  “Nope. I just need you to know I love you, you’re always here for me.”

  “Oh boy.”

  “You know I’m there for you too right? Like, I would seriously die for you. We’ve been together since fucking kindergarten.”

  “Okay,” she sighed, “where you be at? I’m coming to get you. Where’s Katie?”

  “Under Chad.”

  “What?” She softly told Goliath to get down then, “Moses, what are you talking about?”

  “Nothing. I’ll be there in a bit.”

  “You aren’t driving, are you? I will seriously use your balls for ping pong if you drive like this.”

  “I’m calling a cab.”

  “No, I’m coming to get you. Give me an address.”

  I sobered enough to sound stern, “do not come out here. It’s New Year’s Eve, people are drinking.”

  “Stop trying to sound big and bad and give me an addy.”

  “666 Hell’s Gate, California zip code 666.”

  “You were at Jacob’s right? I’ll be right there.”

  “Well,” I picked at a piece of leather on my steering wheel. “I’m down the street from Jacob’s…you’ll see my car.”

  Long pause then, “what the holy hell were you thinking, you stupid son of a bitch!”

  I have no defense so I let her rant at me for drinking and driving as she slipped on some jeans and whistled to Goliath. I heard her car door slam as she continued to tell me how dumb I was and what the consequences of my actions could’ve been.

  Quite a time later she was pulled up alongside me and I got out of my car like I was 100 years old then sat in the passenger seat of her old ass red jeep with eyelashes on the headlights. She and Goliath stared at me. He was in the back seat but I think he was human in a past life. They actually sat there and scowled for a good three minutes.

  “I’m sorry-.” I was about to say.

  She pointed at me, “shut up. Don’t say a word. Just sit there in your wrongness and be wrong.”

  I set my head back on the seat and she rolled off. We were silent a long time but then she asked what happened so I told her. The more I told her, the sicker I got.

  “I let her fall when she was getting dressed, is that like hitting a woman?” I asked.

  “No, that’s like letting Dorothy’s house fall on the wicked witch.”

  “I went bonkers, Chloe.”

  “Most guys would.”

  “I destroyed Jacob’s foyer.”

  “He lives in Beverly Hills. I don’t think he cares.”

  I sat forward and felt the throw up coming. “Oh God, Chad’s ass.”

  “What?” She frowned at me but kept checking the road.

  “Never mind. Pull over.”

  She did and I hopped from the car to throw up. She was at my side in a hot minute while Goliath barked from the car. When I was done we got back in her jeep and she took me to her apartment.

  There were so many stairs it felt like we were climbing Mt. Mordor from Lord of the Rings. We finally made it and I breathed easily in her place.

  The far wall was floor to ceiling windows and the roof was gabled on one side. That side of the roof was also made up of nothing but windows, so I could see the night sky and other apartment buildings. A poor man’s penthouse, but it’s so warm.

  Her bed is like mine and lay directly on the floor with no box spring, just a mattress but it had a canopy that draped over the upper half. The couch was a futon, also on floor level. This place made me feel like I was seven feet instead of 6”1.

  She had a few plants splashed around including hanging ones and the only doors belonged to the closet and bathroom.

  As someone without a family, she only has three pictures in frames on her dresser. One of me, Goliath and her friend Brianna. On her fridge is a picture of my parents, that’s it.

  I plopped down on her bed and looked at my phone.

  All messages were from Katie.

  “Moses, this is stupid.”

  “This isn’t that big a deal.”

  “Call me.”

  “I can’t believe you made such a scene.”

  “Where the fuck are you?”

  “You’re an asshole.”

  I was about to read the next one but Chloe took my phone and shut it off. “You don’t need that right now. Just sleep.” She instructed.

  “I’m sorry I messed up your New Year’s.”

  She jerked her head at the TV. “Um, yeah, you really messed up my sitting at home alone doing nothing with Goliath and binge watching Game of Thrones.”

  “You know what I mean.” I reached up and took her hand and she held on. “Thanks.”

  “Always.”

  I took in the sight of my best friend. She’s tall but still a head shorter than me. She’s also biracial. Half Israeli and half Greek, so her skin is caramel, a warm brown but her hair is gold. Not blonde, it’s honey gold and made up of nothing but springy waves and curls that go down to her middle back. She has big Disney eyes the color of emerald and a tiny dot of a nose ring.

  She’s also got tats. Her right arm has a few and the underside of her left. There’s one down her side and another at her thigh. Belly button is pierced. She has three extra in her ear. She’s gorgeous. All woman and no girl left. Not like when we met and we were both the size of a yard stick.

  “Get some sleep.” She bent and kissed my head. Her scent of Gardenia made me feel at ease and her fingers through my hair was a sleeping drought. I love this girl. Chloe is literally my best friend in the whole world and she always will be.

  CHLOE

  Nice launch into disaster to good old 2012. Cheers to heartbreak and ruin.

  Moses leaned into me after I pushed my fingers through his dark hair and the feel of him against the lower half of my body was giving my heart a worrisome jump.

  It really sucks to have feelings for your best friend. Never knowing if you should read into what they say or do. Wondering if the intimacy of the moment is romantic or just familiar.

  He groaned and I rubbed his shoulders, “come on, lay down.” I insisted.

  He pushed himself back on my bed and laid flat. Moses is sexy as hell. He’s taking up almost the whole bed with that sexy ass but he’s my guy. He’s what I call ‘my Flounder.’ We friend zoned one another years ago so nothing will ever happen. He’s like Flounder to me from The Little Mermaid.

  I knelt at the foot of the bed and untied his boots. I slipped them off but he was like a dead man. Moses doesn’t drink so I’m pretty sure he feels like he’s being run over by a truck.

  I stood up as Goliath went to sleep up on the bed to Moses’ right and blew air through my lips. My boys.

  I shimmied out of my jeans and put my PJ pants back on before getting in on Moses’ left. I’m on my side facing him and a few thousand things come to mind. His drinking and driving, that upset me deeply. He knows better and it could’ve cost him. I know this man if he’d of hurt someone he would never forgive hims
elf.

  Then I thought about Katie. I always hated Katie but I hated all the girls he dated, they all had one thing in common that I couldn’t get over. They weren’t me.

  Then I thought of his temper. I saw how bloody his knuckles were. I knew Moses had a temper but it takes extreme situations to draw it out. He has unusual calm about everything and he’s weirdly forgiving but certain things will push him over or if there’s a buildup he’ll blow.

  “I totally went overboard.” He said.

  I thought he was asleep so his words made my brows go up. “You loved Katie.” I looked at his chest because the day he told me he was engaged was probably the worst day of my life. “She hurt you, any guy would flip.”

  “Jacob is going to kill me.”

  “You went Cabana Man.”

  He looked over at me with bloodshot eyes and went from serious to laughing. I laughed too. Cabana Man was our inside joke about his temper.

  “Hear anymore from asshole?” he asked me.

  Dave. The Moses substitute. I go through guys like shoes, but they’re all dicks and I’ve never been in a relationship lasting longer than six months.

  “Nah, he’s sleeping with a girl from work.”

  “Fuck em’ then. He doesn’t deserve you. Want me to go Cabana Man on him too?”

  I laughed. “He didn’t hurt my feelings. I didn’t like him enough for him to hurt me.”

  “You always say that but I know how easy you fall in love. It hurt so don’t lie.” I shrugged so he patted his chest. “C’mon,” he said. I curled closer and set my head there. He held me and toyed with my hair. On his forearm is a big scorpion tattoo. He’s into astrology so he got the symbol of his sun sign. I stared at it as I thought.

  “We suck at relationships,” I muttered.

  “It’s not us…it’s them.” We laughed again, “Goodnight Baby Girl.” He said before closing his eyes. His dark brown hair made his skin glow soft in this light, and I resisted a need to touch his close beard.

  “Night Moses.”

  Chapter Two

  Four Years Later

  April 2016

  “And, five, six, seven, eight-.” Booty Wurk by T-Pain came blasting over the studio speakers and myself and six of my students followed my lead in some exotic dance moves.

  The studio room I teach in is spacious with polished floors and shimmering silver poles running from floor to ceiling. A mirror covers the length and width of the far wall and I can spot all six to deliver instruction.

  So far so good. They got this routine. From the floor to the pole they all mimicked me with perfection. “Loosen up Sandy!” I called as we swung and swung on the pole. “Kristy, straighten that leg.”

  I did one leg drop to the floor and like a spineless cat I rolled my shoulder blades and hiked up my ass before rolling to my back and kicking my legs in a slow cycle motion. My girls were rocking this. They all looked hot as hell and they all had drive.

  With the beat, I slithered back up the pole and bent backward to touch the floor before using my thighs to hold on and pull myself back up.

  The rest of the song only showed me minor things I had to straighten out on this team but for the most part, they were flawless.

  My crazy tall high heels looked like boots since I had on tight black leg warmers; my sports bra was black too. My spandex workout shorts were leopard print and made my ass cheeks look impressive. Then again pole dancing was one thing to definitely cure insecurity. You can’t not feel like a sex goddess on the pole.

  “Whip the hair girls,” I warned as the last minute of the song bumped with a grind. On all fours, they whipped their hair with me to dust the floor and slinked upright.

  Hair in my face and sweat dampening my skin I looked up in the mirror to check them and found Moses in the doorway.

  My mood instantly alighted.

  He was mimicking us to be funny and whipping hair too short to move. I laughed silently so not to distract them and mouthed. “One minute.”

  He winked and my heart did that, “I still haven’t learned flutter.”

  When the song ended I applauded my class and they all hugged or high fived me. They saw Moses and eyes told it all. Flirtatious flutters and shy “Hi’s”

  As they filed out with their bags he came further in, “You all look awesome,” he said.

  “Thanks.” I took a towel from the table by the door and patted my face dry. “I think four might sign up for the next class schedule.”

  He grabbed my face and kissed my forehead which caught me off guard. He’s really excited about something. “Did you get my text?” he asked.

  “Uh, the one that said, ‘my dad is driving me crazy at the bookstore,’ or the one that said, ‘Omg life is crazy, tell you later?’

  He handed me my water bottle. “The last one. You won’t believe what happened to me today.”

  “You realized the song Mary Jane by Tom Petty is about pot, not a girl?”

  He frowned, “no, I-. Wait. It’s not about a girl?”

  I laughed, “songs from that era are almost always about drugs.”

  “Some are about love.”

  “Nope.” I squirted water into my mouth.

  “Knight’s in White Satin? That’s obviously about knight’s riding in white satin.”

  I pressed my lips together then smiled, “aww, you’re so cute when you’re dumb.”

  “Whatever,” he slapped my water away and I laughed, “listen, I’m serious. Something happened today.”

  “I’ve got five minutes till my next class so spill.”

  “I met a girl at the bookshop.”

  There went my happy. It literally plummeted on me. Wow. So it begins. Hi backseat, long time no see.

  “Yeah? A girl?” I tried to sound perky.

  “She’s incredible. Her name is Jenzy. She’s gorgeous, she’s funny, she’s got all the same hippie beliefs and she loves my dad’s bookstore.”

  “Hmm,” I nodded and crossed my arms, “she sounds…just perfect.”

  “And she’s married.”

  Three Cheers for The Red, White, and Blue!!!

  “Aww, that’s too bad.”

  “It would be wrong, right? To pursue anything?”

  “Very, very, very wrong. Like you would need, ten hail Mary’s.”

  He set his hands in his back pockets, “She just didn’t seem very happy, though.”

  “Well, I hear marriage can be a bitch.”

  He sighed. “It’s not gonna happen. I would never do that, I needed to say it out loud.”

  I felt happier again with his confession. “So how did you meet this perfect, married girl?” I started doing some stretches while he talked.

  “It was all very universes intervened. A bookcase I’ve been telling my Dad to anchor fell forward and I got her out from under it in time. Then we talked about astrology and she knows Gerda! She goes to my gym but she takes the early morning Yoga, not the one I teach. Tell me how unfair the stars are. Hot, funny, sweet, and stays in shape. Where else do I find that?”

  Yes, Moses. Where else? Please ignore the enormous ME sticker on my friggin forehead you blind moron.

  I stopped and looked up in those great brown eyes. “Just keep looking, you’ll find one. Maybe you should get laid to take the edge off.”

  “I don’t need to get laid.”

  “You’ve been cranky.” I went to a pole and held on so I could lean out and swing.

  He came over and held the same pole with both hands so I stood straight on the other side and did the same. “I’m just worried about my dad sometimes. If he lost the shop it would kill him. It’s all he has of mom. It’s not like my sister would come out here and help.”

  Moses’ mother started a bookstore before she died, called New Age, Old Soul Books. It became unexpectedly successful and now he and his father run it. His dad is dropping the ball on things though.

  “You were there all day. You see anything weird with his finances?”

 
; He leaned the side of his face against the pole and having him close made my stomach knot. “I have a suspicion he’s overpaying certain bills and get this, he set up payment plans with like five different companies and I noticed they upped the payments due. He doesn’t get he had an agreement. They can’t do that.”

  “So find his documents, look up the agreements and the amounts then bust them. They probably know he’s older and they’re pulling stuff to rip him off.”

  “He’s not sick or anything…doctors say he almost doesn’t care. I think it’s because of mom. He wants the store but he’s too depressed and beat to upkeep it.”

  I covered his hands with mine on the pole. “I could take some shifts there. It’s a busy store, and you have all those yoga classes to teach.”

  He kissed my hand. “Thanks, Baby Girl, but you have your pole dancing classes, the big performance coming up in July. You need to focus on that.”

  “I still have free time. Speaking of which,” I paused when I heard the next class coming. “Come over tonight. We can watch the newest Game of Thrones together and get Chinese. My treat.”

  He frowned, “I never let you treat, since when would I let you tonight?”

  “Yeah but I got paid today.”

  “Great, put it toward food other than Ramen and cheese and cracker packets.”

  “That’s a dancer diet, my friend.” I replied.

  “That’s a broke diet.” He said.

  I laughed and bugged my eyes. “Okay! Fine, you can pay, but come over.”

  He watched me while my girls filed in and I started to ask myself if the stare meant something else. I know better after all these years to ask myself that but I still do.

  “Okay, see you at nine.” He started for the door.

  “Staying over or….?”

  He turned to face me as he backed out the door. “Maybe, I’ll throw a change in my car just in case.”