Unknown Forces

by Samantha Hicks

  “I don’t buy it.” She leaned against the doorjamb and folded her arms across her chest. “Try again.”

  “I guess I wanted you to have a choice about whether you wanted to see me or not. If I barged in, your choice would have been taken away from you.”

  That was probably the sweetest thing Riley had ever said to her. Jennifer had always thought her inconsiderate, a pain in the ass. Thinking back over the years, she realised her own thoughts were colouring the truth and not who Riley was at all. She had been wrong, so very wrong.

  She stepped aside. “Thank you. Come in.”

  “Oh, these are for you.” Riley held out a huge arrangement of roses, lilies, and baby’s-breath, all wrapped in light pink cellophane.

  “Flowers? For me?”

  “Yeah. I picked them up for free at the petrol station when I bought a full tank of petrol.”

  Now that was clearly a lie. Riley had bought petrol-station flowers before and they never looked as beautiful as these did. She glanced at Riley and saw the blush tinging her cheeks. She’s embarrassed. Jennifer didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable, so she let it go.

  “I was about to have some wine. Would you like a glass?”

  “Yes, thank you.”

  “Follow me to the kitchen and I’ll grab us some and put these in water.”

  They headed into the kitchen and she set about filling two wine glasses with Rioja, then searched for a vase. Riley jumped up onto the kitchen counter and sat, then began gently banging her heels against the cabinet beneath her. Jennifer felt the nerves shooting off her in waves. It made her feel good, knowing she was able to work Riley up. It was only fair, as Riley had been driving her crazy for days.

  “So, how have you been?” Riley asked.

  “You make it sound like I didn’t see you yesterday,” she said as she handed Riley a glass of wine.

  “Sorry, nervous.”

  “Nervous? Why?” Jennifer stood between Riley’s open knees, placing her hands on her thighs. Riley’s breathing increased, and Jennifer grinned. She was definitely working her up.

  “I’m not sure how to handle you,” Riley said, looking everywhere except at Jennifer. “I’m used to you having a dig at me, and me storming off. Us being civil is new, and it’s freaking me out a little. So is this.” She indicated the position they were in.

  Jennifer leaned closer still, close enough to feel the heat coming from Riley. “If you want, I can throw an insult or two at you and you can slam a few doors?”

  “Thanks for the offer, but maybe we could just talk. Eventually I’ll get used to it.”

  “Okay.” Jennifer took a step back so she no longer stood in her personal space. Riley blew out a breath and ran a hand through her hair, looking relieved. For someone who was always so sure of herself with women, she seemed to be struggling in Jennifer’s presence. Jennifer wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing. Still, it was incredibly adorable how flustered Riley was.

  Riley blew out a deep breath, running her hand through her hair. She took a sip of her wine. “I spoke to Kelsey earlier on the phone. She seems to be doing well.”

  “The op was a great success. Her blood pressure has stabilised. She should be coming home tomorrow.”

  “That’s great, isn’t it?”

  “It’ll be nice to have her home. If she stays off her feet, I’ll be happy.”

  “Will you be picking her up? I can do it if you need to work.”

  “I talked to my boss this morning and explained the situation. He’s happy for me to take a couple of weeks off and then maybe see about working from home part of the week.”

  “As I said before, I can do the same.” Riley slid off the countertop, put her wine glass down, and stood in front of Jennifer. “The garage is doing well. I can rearrange some jobs to give me some time off.”

  “Thank you. We’ll see how she gets on being home, but I imagine I’ll need your help keeping her in bed.”

  “One of my specialties,” she said as she waggled her perfectly shaped eyebrows.

  The image of them in bed together the other morning flashed through Jennifer’s mind, along with how turned-on she had been lying in Riley’s arms. She couldn’t stop the heat rushing into her cheeks. With one sentence, Riley had managed to turn the tables and get her all flustered.

  “You’re blushing. It’s cute,” Riley said.

  “I’ve never been able to control that.”

  “It’s nice. Let’s me know what kind of thoughts are circulating in that pretty head of yours.” Riley walked closer, until she stood inches away from Jennifer.

  Jennifer was new to this, wanting someone as much as she wanted Riley. She had played a dangerous game, flirting with her earlier, making Riley sweat, but Riley had quickly and effectively flipped the rules and was getting her back for it. They needed to slow down, because as much as Jennifer wanted her, now was not the right time.

  “Baby steps, don’t forget,” Jennifer whispered.

  “I know, but there’s no harm in giving you a gentle nudge now and then.” Riley ran her hand up Jennifer’s arm and cupped her cheek.

  “Have you heard anything more from your mother?” Now that extinguished any flames between them instantly. Riley blinked and took a step back, clearly not expecting her to ask that. Jennifer berated herself for bringing it up, but she’d had to do something to slow down the rollercoaster they were on.

  “No. But to be fair I haven’t really been home much. Working and sorting out Dad’s house.” She got that lost and confused look on her face again, and Jennifer wanted to take her pain away.

  “Have you thought about what you’re going to do with it?”

  “Sell, I guess. I don’t need it and I only have bad memories of living there anyway. I have a meeting with his solicitor next week to go over all his financial stuff and whatnot.”

  Jennifer took her hand and pulled her into the lounge. They settled on the couch, and after she took a gulp of wine, she asked, “Can I ask you a question?” Riley nodded. “When did you start having a crush on me?”

  A huge smile blossomed on Riley’s face. “Do you remember the barbeque we had for Kelsey’s fourteenth birthday?”

  “Of course I do. That was the day you threw a bucket of cold water over me for, and I quote, ‘a laugh’.” All of Kelsey’s school friends hooted, thinking it was hilarious, and it was all Jennifer could do not to throttle Riley where she stood, bucket still in hand. Jennifer expected her to run off, but she just stood there, mouth hanging open, deer-in-the-headlights shocked.

  “Kelsey egged me on to do it, and you know me, always up for a dare. You came out of the kitchen into the garden wearing a lime green bikini and I tossed the water over you. This is going to sound so perverted.” She covered her rapidly heating face with her hands.

  “It’s okay, tell me.”

  “When you finally stopped flailing about, you stood in front of me so angry even your ears were red. I thought about running away cuz I thought you were going to hit me, but I was transfixed. Your skin was all wet and I couldn’t stop looking at your nipples through the bikini top from the cold water. I didn’t understand what was happening; all I knew was I couldn’t move. I was fourteen years old and I’m pretty sure if I had been a boy, I’d have poked an eye out with my erection.

  “I was confused, and later that night, while I was in bed, I masturbated for the first time, thinking about you. Ever since then my infatuation continued, and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t stop seeing you in that damn bikini.”

  Well that explained the strange look on Riley’s face back then. Jennifer had no idea that she had felt that way. Even at fourteen Riley was taller than Jennifer. Riley had been a skinny teenager, and now she was all lean muscle.

  “I still have it, the bikini. You never know, one day I might wear it again for you.”

  Riley shook her head and laughed. “I’d probably have a heart attack. You were the one who helped me come to terms with
being a lesbian, although you didn’t know it.”

  “I guess it’s fate; you’re doing the same to me now.” It was true. Until Riley, Jennifer had never questioned her sexuality. Now, though, she was pretty sure she liked women.

  “Do you have a crush on me?” Riley asked.

  “You know I do.”

  “Since when?”

  Jennifer thought back to the first time she really noticed Riley. “About five years ago. When I had my appendix out.” Riley had just turned twenty-three, her body filling out with muscle. Her garage had been open six months, and the work she did on cars had helped turn her skinny frame into the powerhouse it was now. Jennifer had gotten appendicitis and was laid up in bed for a couple of weeks.

  “Even though you thought I hated you, you still helped me get better. Cooking for us and helping with the housework. You were amazing with Kelsey when she thought I might die when it first ruptured. After that I began to think back to everything you ever did for us, apart from the tormenting.”

  “That was the only way I could get you to notice me.”

  “Oh, no. I’ve always noticed you. I truly am sorry for all the horrible things I’ve said to you.”

  “It’s okay. I probably deserved most of them.”

  “No, no, you didn’t.”

  “I want to kiss you.” Riley shifted, their mouths just inches apart, their breath mingling. They moved closer still and Jennifer’s heart pounded.

  Her mobile rang loudly through the lounge, making them jump apart. She glanced at the caller ID.

  “Shit. It’s my aunt. I promised I’d update her about Kelsey.” The ringing stopped.

  “Call her back.” Riley stood and shook her body loose. “I’m going to head home.”

  “You don’t need to leave.”

  “Yes, I do. I’ll be over tomorrow night to see Kelsey if she’s home by then.”

  “You can come over even if she isn’t.”

  “Goodnight, Jenny.” She headed through the door without looking back.

  Jennifer leaned back into the couch, vibrating with lingering arousal. She was too close to losing control, to giving in to the need to kiss Riley. If her phoned hadn’t rung she wondered where that kiss would have led them. There was no doubt in her mind she wanted Riley, and Riley clearly wanted her. It was probably a good job the phone had interrupted them. Her body might be burning for Riley, but no way was Jennifer emotionally ready for her. She still had her doubts about Riley’s ability to have a serious relationship, and to be honest with herself, Jennifer wasn’t sure she would be ready for one either.

  She finished off her wine and dialed her aunt’s number.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “Hiya, Riles.”

  Riley banged her head on the boot lid of the car she was changing the brake light on. She stood and rubbed at the spot she’d hit, feeling a lump already forming. She turned to see her best friend walk over to her.

  “Kelsey? What are you doing here? You’ve only been out of hospital two weeks. You’re supposed to be on bedrest.”

  Kelsey looked tired, even more so than when Riley saw her three days ago. Kelsey had come home two days after her operation and although she wouldn’t admit it, it had taken its toll. Jennifer had been keeping a close eye on her, not letting her get out of bed, and Riley visited when she could.

  Pretending she wasn’t avoiding Jennifer would be a lie. The urge to pull her close and kiss her was so strong, Riley had taken to not going over to the sisters’ house as much as she normally would.

  “I was going crazy just sitting around. Jen’s hovering hasn’t helped.”

  “She’s just looking out for you. She’ll go mad if she finds out you’re here,” she warned.

  “Well, we won’t tell her, then,” Kelsey said with a sly grin.

  “How did you get out?” Riley wiped her hands on a dirty rag and studied her. Dark circles ringed Kelsey’s eyes, and her lips were dry and cracked. She didn’t look good at all, not like the vibrant woman she once was. A sickening feeling settled in Riley’s stomach.

  “She had to go into work for a few hours. I took the chance to do a runner.”

  Kelsey looked like she was about to pass out, her face had drained of colour and her step faltered. Riley took her by the elbow and guided Kelsey into her small office. She gestured to the ergonomic office chair. “Here, sit down.”

  “So, how’s my best friend doing?” Kelsey asked once she was settled, resting her hand on her bump.

  Kelsey was doing a good job of acting normal, but it wasn’t hard to see how much she struggled to catch her breath. The sweat gathering on her forehead also clued Riley in to how much of an effort sitting here was.

  I should get her home, now. “I’m great,” she said instead.

  “I’ve known you most of your life. Please don’t lie to me.”

  No way was she going to add to Kelsey’s health problems. She looked like she could keel over at any moment. “I’m not lying, everything is fine.”

  Kelsey raised her eyebrows. “I know you’re keeping something from me. What is it?”

  Kelsey had always been too astute at reading her. She also wouldn’t miss the fact Riley hadn’t been to her house as regularly as she ordinarily was. Riley looked at Kelsey expectantly. Kelsey wouldn’t let it drop, she was too stubborn, so she might as well get it over with. The sooner she told Kelsey, the quicker she could get her home. She went to her desk and leaned back against it.

  “The day of my dad’s funeral, my mother was waiting for me at my house when Jenny dropped me off.”

  “Wow.”

  “Yeah, that’s not all. It turns out Dad wasn’t my biological father. She had an affair. Dad found out and kicked her out.”

  “But he said he had an affair?”

  “I know. I don’t know if he was trying to protect me from the truth or maybe he did after he found out about me. She said he hit her, kicked her out, and forbid her from seeing me. I don’t know how much of that is true and I really don’t care anymore. What has pissed me off is it turns out she married my biological father and they now have a son. I have a nine-year-old brother.”

  “Wow.” Kelsey leaned forward, as much as she could with her bump in the way, and grasped Riley’s hand. “How come you didn’t tell me any of this?”

  “How could I? You have your own things happening at the moment and I didn’t want you worrying about me.”

  Kelsey looked hurt. They had never kept secrets from each other, and this was a pretty big announcement. If Riley were in Kelsey’s shoes, she’d be majorly pissed off too.

  “You’re my best friend. You should have told me; I could have helped you.”

  “I know. But it’s okay. I talked to Jenny about it. She was a great help.”

  “Jenny? You’re blushing.”

  Seems like Jenny isn’t the only one with a blushing problem. “Yeah. We kinda, sorta, maybe, might like each other.”

  “I knew it! She said you were getting along, and I know when you’ve been at the house you two haven’t argued, but I never thought it was more than you trying for my sake. I want details.”

  Riley moved away and stood at the other side of the small office. How could she put into words her feelings for Jennifer? She was in danger of falling in love with her, if she hadn’t already, but they were far from being at that stage. She wasn’t even sure if a relationship was something Jennifer was looking for. Just because she said she was attracted to her didn’t mean Jennifer wanted to pursue it. “There isn’t much to tell. We’ve chatted a few times, flirted, admitted we’re attracted to each other, but it hasn’t been more than that.”

  “Why not? What’s stopping you both?”

  Riley didn’t answer, truly because she didn’t know.

  “Is it me?” Kelsey asked.

  “Jenny has a lot to cope with right now. Work, studying, and yes, your health and the little one on its way. I also have stuff to figure out myself. It’s just not the right tim
e.” It was a lame excuse, but it was true: they did have a lot going on. Maybe once everything was sorted they could try.

  “There will always be things standing in the way. You can’t let that stop you from being happy.”

  “There’s no rush. Besides, we’ve only been getting along the last couple of weeks. We’ve spent seventeen years fighting. It’s a new dynamic we’re both adjusting to.”

  Kelsey slowly stood and went to Riley, shaking her head. “I can’t believe you never told me any of this.”

  “Kelsey Marie Wilson! Get your ass back home now!” Jennifer’s tone was furious.

  They turned to look out the window of the office. Jennifer stood by the garage door, hands on her hips, her face a deep red. Even pissed off she was beautiful. She strode into the office, not once looking at Riley. The dismissal stung.

  “Jen, what are you doing here?” Kelsey asked.

  “I got back home and saw your car missing. I might have known you’d be here.” She shot a glare at Riley. “You’re aware she’s supposed to be on bedrest?”

  “Not her fault. She didn’t know I was coming.”

  “Well she should have sent you home the minute you arrived.” She looked back to Riley. “Do you really want her falling ill again?”

  Jennifer had every right to be angry. Kelsey hadn’t been home long, and her preeclampsia was a serious problem. But Kelsey was stubborn. Riley couldn’t make her do anything. Feeling the need to defend herself, Riley said, “That’s not fair.”

  “Shit. I’m sorry. I’m just worried about her.” Jennifer’s face softened as she gave Riley a sad smile.

  Her first reaction to Riley was always anger. Just because they were attracted to each other didn’t mean that would suddenly change. Riley had to face the fact that they probably wouldn’t have a future.

  “I’m leaving now anyway.” Kelsey glanced at Jennifer. “And yes, I’ll go straight home.” She turned back to Riley. “Come by and see me when you’ve finished work. I want to know about the ass kicking you’re about to get.”