The Irish was thicker in his voice, strong and potent as it always became when he was pissed. Between that and the profanity, he knew he was on a fine line of control he couldn’t afford to break.
“I beg to differ. The operative word there is persuade. You haven’t used force; you’ve not taken away her choices. If anything, you’ve offered her more. She agreed to become your sub because she likes you, Braun. It speaks to her strength of character that she’s taken that step. I think if you’d put pressure on her, strong-armed her into making decisions she wasn’t ready for, she’d have kicked you in the teeth and testicles by now and walked away cursing your name.”
Braun winced, his balls shriveling at the mere thought of absorbing a hefty kick from her boot. “She would’ve let me fuck her without saying a goddamn word. I could have hurt her, Connie. I’m not exactly the ideal size for an innocent, and my urges can be rough.”
“I’ve seen you fuck,” the Domme said mildly. A wicked smile curved her lips at whatever memory she dredged up. “Yes, you could have, but Bodie believes she knew the risks of that and accepted them. Accepts them. She doesn’t want to be treated like she’s fragile, Braun, which is something you may have to take into account. I’ve seen you play, and balancing rough with tender is within your skillset.”
“I’ll balance rough with tender, all right, when I take a strip off her ass.”
“Don’t punish her for this. I convinced her to let me tell you, which she was vehemently opposed to. If you lead her to think that her secrets will earn her punishments if she reveals them to either one of us, we’ve lost her before we’ve ever really started. Bodie must learn to trust we won’t use what she tells us against her.”
Well hell, he hadn’t seen it that way. He was a giant tangle of urges. Spank her, cuddle her, shout at her, rock her. It galled him he’d missed all the signs she’d been sending. Even when he’d caught an inkling something was amiss and he’d asked questions, he’d asked the wrong ones and read her answers to suit what he thought he knew.
“I want to know more about the fuckwits tormenting her,” he growled.
“As do I. But I’m not going to herd her into a corner. Simply by letting her talk tonight, she’s steered the conversation into several areas I’ve noted down to touch upon. She’s not straight lines and precise angles, Braun. Her brain is literally a maze of confusion and repression.”
He studied his palms. “Is she competent enough to give consent?”
“Look at me, Master Braun.” Shit, she was using her Domme voice with great effect. He met her eyes, read the sympathy in them. “You haven’t violated consent. Bodie is of sound mind and she knows her own thoughts, her own feelings. It’s my opinion you are what she needs right now. She needs stability, guidance, and someone who cares for her and will continue to show her she matters even when she acts out in an attempt to prove everyone in her life walks away when she needs them the most.”
Hmmm. He could do that. Had been doing that. “Do I need to back off?”
“Pursuing intercourse? No. Whatever you’ve been doing, keep doing it. Any major changes in your behavior toward her now will only solidify her reasons for not telling you.”
That was what stung the most. Bodie hadn’t told him. The trust he’d thought they were building between them fizzled, died. He might have to act as though this revelation hadn’t hacked him off at the knees, but Bodie was going to have to put some effort in to earn back what she’d lost.
He rose, sighing heavily as added weight thumped down on his shoulders. He’d stepped onto a minefield he wasn’t quite sure how to navigate. If his emotions weren’t twined with her, if his heart wasn’t into her one hundred percent, he’d walk away from her. How many times had he told Bodie the lifestyle was about trust? Asked her to trust him?
What else was she lying about?
Oh, he could understand why she’d lied to him about this. What her asshole parents would do to her, he wished on no one. Should they try get their dirty paws on his girl, he would deal with them once and for all. But it didn’t—couldn’t—erase the fact she’d evaded the topic and lied.
They’d be lucky if the relationship lasted.
But he wasn’t going to think like that, he chastised himself sternly. Giving up on her now wasn’t an option, and if he kept thoughts of breaking up with her in his head, she would sense them. His little liar was astute that way.
No, ending it wasn’t the right thing for either of them.
“I’ll take that into account,” he told Connie. “I’m so goddamn mad with her right now. Not only for lying about her experience, but for remaining in a position where she’s open to danger.” That he intended to remedy tonight, whether she liked it or not. She wouldn’t be living within snatching distance of her parents for the foreseeable future. He’d chain her to the fucking bed first. “I really want to make sure she can’t sit down for a week. A month.”
“That is, of course, your prerogative. You know my opinion.” Connie waved a hand toward the door. “Go find her and take her home, Braun. She’s had a long night. Just remember arguing with her won’t solve your problems, and if she has her back up, angry confrontation will only create a rift.”
“So sayeth the wise woman.”
She laughed tiredly. “Feeling like an old wise woman tonight. You’ve got my number if you need me. Now skedaddle and go let that girl know you still adore her. She’s terrified she’s going to lose you.”
Braun sighed again as he walked to the door. “She won’t, not over this. Thank you, Connie. I’m sorry we messed up your evening, but I really do appreciate it. You want me to send Liam in with a drink, give you some time alone?”
Connie shook her head and closed her eyes, resting her head against the back of the couch. “Thanks, but no. You can switch the lights off if you wouldn’t mind; I’ll just grab a nap and recharge my batteries for an hour.”
“If you’re sure. There’s a spare bed in the house if you need it.”
She snorted. “Don’t think Bodie will appreciate sharing a bed with either me or you. I’m good here. Now don’t make me tell you a second time to go get your girl.”
Unwilling to anger an exhausted Mistress, Braun eased out of the room, killing the lights before he shut the door firmly. He hated imposing on her; he knew not all of her clients were the easiest to deal with. Some, like Bodie, were complex, and deciphering the way their minds worked put therapists such as Connie under a great deal of emotional and mental pressure.
Striding down the walkway, Braun’s thoughts turned from inconveniencing his friend, to the woman he desired fervently enough he was willing to forgo his next breath to have her.
Innocent.
It explained so much, he realized now. Everything she said and did, the way she acted sometimes, glimmered with that tint of innocence. He’d smudged it now, with his hands and mouth. Intended to do so much more than just smudge it before he was through.
Expecting to see his subbie waiting at the bar, Braun frowned when he couldn’t spot her. His eyes raked up and down the people seated and standing, gathered alone, in pairs and clusters as Liam tried to serve them all in a timely fashion. The night was winding down, Doms and subbies relaxing after good scenes, enjoying the time to just relax and socialize a little before heading home.
Where the fuck was his sub?
Not where she was supposed to be, that was for sure. Growling under his breath, Braun stomped forward to demand answers from his bartender, then paused when Atticus gestured to him from the foyer doorway. Changing direction slightly, Braun headed toward him with sick dread and rising anger stirring in his gut.
If she’d made a break for it, she would feel his belt across her butt.
“Where is she, Atticus?”
The big man grinned. “Bad habit you’ve got there, boss. Losing your subbie for the second time. If you’re not careful, someone’s liable to lock a collar around that pretty throat and snap a leash on her.”
&
nbsp; Braun bared his teeth. “Don’t fuck with me right now, brother. I’m not in the mood, and someone’s liable to have his nose broken if he so much as suggests that again.”
Atticus huffed out a laugh and crossed his arms over the spread of his chest. Sheer intimidation at its finest. Unfortunately for him, Braun’s ire was quickly growing, and intimidation had nothing on the fury in his blood. “And here I thought you’d be the voice of reason compared to the subbie having the mother of meltdowns in the parking lot. Lovers quarrel?”
“No quarrel. She just refuses to stay where she’s told.” Dampening down the angry emotions throttling his control, Braun took a deep breath. “She’s outside? Who’s with her?”
“Jasper and his shadow. He’d just finished with Tiffany when Boadicea shot across the barn like there were demons on her heels. She bulled her way through an exiting group, took a bit of a fall, then sat crying her goddamn heart out in the dirt. Jasper caught up with her, and tears turned into an all-out fight.”
Goddamn it, Jasper better not have his hands on her. Shoving past Atticus, Braun stormed toward the outer door, intent on shredding the sadist into pieces, but a massive hand clamped down on his shoulder and almost hoisted him off his feet. “Atticus, don’t make me break your fingers.”
“Jasper’s got it under control. Before you go marching out there with blood in your eye, just watch. Your little subbie can handle herself just fine, and she’s needed this.”
“They’re still fighting?”
Chuckling, Atticus opened the door and stepped out in front of Braun, keeping that restraining hand in place. From the shadows of the wooden awning, Braun forced himself not to dash over and smash his best friend in the face.
Someone—namely a feisty subbie—had beaten him to it.
With both hands in the air, Jasper dodged the woman swinging at him in the shadows of the security lighting. He jerked his head back, missing what would have been a nasty shot to the face, and caught the other fist she aimed at his belly. “I’ve told you once, lass, and I’ll tell you again—you’re not driving home tonight.”
“I have to go home. Give me my keys back!”
“Not happening, poppet. Last time you ran away, we didn’t see you for a goddamn month aside from when you popped out of your hidey hole to dance.” Jasper released her hand and took a step back, turning to walk back toward the club. “You want to go home, ask your Dom for a ride. That’s what he’s there for.”
There was a bloodcurdling scream of outrage, and Braun jolted when his submissive tackled the sadist with a running leap, landing on his back with an impact that rattled both their bones. Her movements, while still graceful, were sluggish in execution, suggesting she was tiring. “All I want is my fucking car keys!”
Jasper simply reached back and snagged her by a handful of hoody, dropping his shoulder and tumbling her onto the ground with a soft oomph. From the darkest part of the shadows, a tiny figure darted out to comfort the downed woman, only to be silently ordered back by a stern finger.
Anarchy.
“Such bad language from a good girl,” he crooned, grasping Bodie by the hair and tilting her head back. “I know you’re hurting, poppet, which is why I’m content to do this all night. Take all the shots you need; it’s not going to earn you your keys, but the spanking you’re working so hard for will make you feel better.” He let go, patted her on the head, and continued on his journey.
“I’m not a good girl.” Bodie lunged, wrapping her arms around his tailored pants-clad leg and gripping him tightly. She cursed when he just dragged her along behind him. “Please, Master Jasper, just give me my damn keys and let me get away from here.”
“If I believed leaving solved all your problems, I’d drive you home myself. However, you’re exhausted, you’re emotional, and in no fit state to take control of a vehicle. I—ow, goddamn it, Bodie!” Exasperated, Jasper held his cool and simply plucked her off his leg and set her back on her feet. “I don’t condone biting, Boadicea.”
She reared back and slapped him hard across the face. Her own turned an ashen shade of white, but whatever drove her to those lengths just kept on pushing her. “Then hit me back! Come on, it’s what people like you like to do, isn’t it? Wait until you have me on my knees, then kick me onto my face.”
Braun grunted in anger, but Atticus shook his head. “Leave her, boss. J can handle her shit.”
Indeed, he could. Jasper just scratched his chin as though she hadn’t bitch slapped him hard enough to relocate his face to the other side of his skull. “Would that be a man like me, or a Dominant, poppet? I require clarification.”
“Men!” she shrieked, hammering her fists on his chest. “Men like you, like my father. Tearing me apart, ruining everything good in my life.” The blows raining down on Jasper’s chest slowed as she broke. “I don’t want to be this person anymore.”
Wiggling his jaw, Jasper folded her into his arms, pinning her hands between them. When her knees buckled, he just eased them both to the ground, tucking her into the cradle of his crossed legs and rocking her. His lips moved, but the words were inaudible from this distance.
His shadow approached silently, respectfully, and Jasper gave her an order she sprang to obey, hurrying toward the club and pulling up short when she spotted Braun.
The door squeaked open at Braun’s back, spilling a Dominant couple and their resident subbie into fresh air. Atticus dealt with them quickly, ushering them back inside with a few words and a rueful smile.
“Master Braun, Master Jasper says Boadicea needs you now.” Anarchy murmured, almost as pale as Bodie. “I don’t think she’s feeling too good.”
“I’ll just bet she’s not,” he muttered, listening to the soft sounds of Bodie weeping. It worked wonders on erasing the last vestiges of his annoyance with her. He couldn’t stay mad with a woman who only wanted to defend herself—and she did so admirably.
Not many men had the balls to strike Jasper Fairfax, but Bodie did.
“I’d appreciate it if you’d stay here with Master Atticus until Master Jasper comes back, Archie.” The last thing he had time to deal with was Bodie going apocalyptic on a fellow submissive—poor Anarchy wouldn’t stand a chance against his subbie’s inner demons. “I won’t keep him too much longer.”
The tiny blonde shrugged her shoulders. “He’s not mine, Master Braun.” Her sigh was wistful. “Would you like me to get you and your sub anything, Sir?”
“No, thank you, little one. Just stay here. Keep an eye on her, please, Atticus,” he murmured to his friend, then made his way over to the mess unravelling in the parking lot.
His boots scrunched lightly on the thin covering of gravel, alerting Jasper to his presence. Ice blue eyes gleamed in the lights, the cheekbone beneath the left one already darkening with an impressive shiner. Remnants of blood streaked under his nose, around his mouth where he’d obviously wiped the majority of it away.
“Someone give you a pastin’ there, lad?” Braun asked in amusement.
Bodie moaned, long and deep, like a wounded animal.
“Your hellion knows how to make a man see stars. Maybe next time she can demonstrate on you.” Jasper rubbed his captive’s back gently. “I’d appreciate a little help here, brother. My ass is numb from these damn stones.”
“You were the one who complained about the mud in wintertime.” Braun reached down and plucked his errant subbie from Jasper’s lap. She struggled weakly as he lifted her, settled her onto his hip like a child, then let her head drop weakly into his shoulder with a quiet whimper.
With his free hand, he helped Jasper stand, then gestured to the house beyond the parking lot. “I’d love to stand and chat, J, but I have a pressing matter to deal with. Did my naughty little sub do any lasting damage?”
The sadist cracked his neck, rolling his head gently until something in his neck popped. He ran his tongue around his teeth, then shook his head. “Aside from ringing my bell pretty damn hard, there’s nothing to wr
ite home about. Sure as hell wouldn’t want to meet her in a dark alley at night, though. Poppet packs a punch.”
“She sure does.” Braun felt the echo of those tiny hands battering him not so long ago. She was strong despite being so lean. Must be all that dancing. “If you’re sure you’re okay, I’m gonna take her in and get her head down for the night. Expect an apology tomorrow night once she’s realized the error of her ways.”
Jasper frowned. “Tomorrow’s Sunday.”
“It is.”
“Boadicea never comes into the club on a Sunday.”
Braun just smiled slowly. “Things change, J. Bodie’s about to understand just how quickly they do so.” When she moaned again, he nuzzled her hair and murmured, “They change even faster once all those secrets come into the light, little one.”
Rubbing his marked cheek, Jasper’s frown deepened. “Not trying to stick my nose in where it doesn’t belong, Braun, but there are circumstances to this. I don’t want her getting in trouble for it.”
“I know, and she’s not. We’ll see you tomorrow night, J.”
“Hold up, you’ll need these.” Metal jangled quietly as he pulled a set of keys from his pocket and handed them over. “Her car keys. Had to make sure she didn’t slip past me and drive off.”
“Good thinking.” Braun shoved them into his own pocket and set off toward the house. Each step roused a tremor in his subbie. By the time he pushed through the garden gate and kicked it shut, she was trembling as though she expected him to read her the riot act...or worse.
Always expecting the worst, he thought. She was always poised to take a hit. Be it a fist or harsh words, she rarely lowered her guard. Just in case.
It took seconds to cross the short width of lawn and carry her into the warmth of the house. He didn’t pause in the hallway, just hauled her tired, emotional ass straight upstairs to the master bedroom. He managed to nudge the main light on with his elbow, then carried her to the bed.
She wouldn’t look at him for love nor money when he slid her down his side onto her feet. Her inner bitch was all burned out, leaving a shell shocked and apparently mute female in her place.
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