A Rancher's Heart

by Vivian Arend

  She said it firmly, meaning every word, but the closer she came to that final statement, the harder it was to speak, until she stopped talking because her throat was closed, and tears were rushing upward.

  To her horror, a sob escaped her lips, and she twisted her chair so that no one could see her make a fool of herself.

  Karen leaned away as if they were talking about something inconsequential. Lisa turned her chair as well, blocking her from the other side, an arm draped casually over her shoulders as she hugged her tight.

  Tamara dragged for air, fighting to keep quiet. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why this is happening.”

  “Maybe because this hot, chemically induced passion between the two of you is something more?”

  Tamara took a tissue from her pocket and wiped her eyes, “I’ve only known the man since October. Hardly enough time for anything more than lust to develop.”

  “You officially met him in July,” Lisa pointed out, “which means you’ve been daydreaming about him for well over six months. Face it, sis, maybe this is a case of when it’s right, it’s right.”

  “Love at first sight? That doesn’t happen in real life.”

  Karen leaned forward in her chair and let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, course. You’re right, nobody has ever had her heart broken by someone she only knew for a short time.”

  Lisa and Tamara both stared at her in shock.

  Karen offered a wan smile. “In case it makes you feel any better—the only reason I would share such an ego-destroying, soul-sucking truth.”

  Lisa glanced between the two of them. “Okay, we need to hold a Whiskeyteers retreat so I can get the truth out of both of you, but”—she held up a finger—“that will have to wait until after this holiday season because at the moment Tamara has bigger fish to fry than satisfying our curiosity. And I can get the details from Karen when we’re alone.”

  “You can try,” Karen scoffed.

  Lisa put her hands on Tamara’s shoulders. “How about I tell you something that should make you feel a little better about your unrequited love.”

  Tamara hissed for her to be quiet. “You think you’d have learned how to use an inside voice by this stage of your life.”

  Lisa motioned for them to lean in closer. “When your boss contacted me last night to find out the details for the Coleman Boxing Day event, he also arranged for the girls to stay and visit for a couple of days.”

  All the strange talk of chores and sleeping arrangements fell into place. “Oh. That’s what they were talking about. That’s great. The girls have been missing Dare, so if we stick around for a while—”

  “No.” Lisa shook her head. “Listen. The girls are sticking around for a couple of days, but you and Caleb are still going back tonight.”

  Shock rolled through her. “Why?”

  Lisa blew a raspberry. “Oh, because he loves doing chores, and he’s forgotten how to make coffee for himself in the two and a half months you’ve been living with them. I don’t know why, he didn’t tell me specifically, but he did set it up so that the girls are staying here, and you and he are going to be back at Heart Falls without two little chaperones.”

  After a careful swipe at her eyes to make sure she no longer looked weepy, Tamara twisted to be able to gaze into the room. Only half of the clan were around, the other half visible outside the window playing in the snowy wonderland, or seated around the giant bonfire pit her cousins had made.

  Caleb was inside talking with his sister Dare and her cousin Jesse.

  Their eyes met across the room…

  Nothing.

  It wasn’t as if it was a magical moment. His eyes didn’t light up with passionate flames. He didn’t wink, or offer any insight as to why he might have gone out of his way to change plans without telling her.

  “I actually think you might be right on that one,” she muttered. “That he wants me along to cook and clean for him. Wouldn’t that be the kicker? I get my hopes up, and then get to enjoy an empty house to masturbate in for two days.”

  Lisa snickered.

  Karen looked a little scandalized. “God, I can’t believe you just said that.”

  “What, masturbate?” Tamara looked at her older sister in shock. “You’re such a prude, but I’ll forgive you, because broken hearts suck the big one.”

  “Eloquent as always.”

  “No matter how painful, truth is beautiful.” Tamara closed her eyes for a moment, considered this new twist. It was wonderful and terrifying at the same time.

  What did she want?

  She peeked across the room again, examining Caleb carefully. Broad shoulders under the neat, jean shirt that he’d worn, arms folded over his chest as he listened to Jesse and her Uncle Mike debate.

  The three men were poster-perfect examples of the strength and masculine beauty found in the ranching community. Jesse’s dark good looks with a firm jawline and mischief shining in his eyes. Uncle Mike’s hair was shot with silver, but the family resemblance between them was so strong it was like looking at before and after photos of the same man.

  And there in the middle was Caleb, not quite as young, not nearly so old, but the years of responsibility had given him a look of maturity and solid dependability that she admired in a man.

  Dependable, but sexy as hell. No denying it.

  But did she want him for a fling, or for something far more enduring?

  Screw it—she wasn’t about to lie to herself. She knew what she wanted.

  The question was, what was he thinking? Was this just an opportunity, if Lisa was right, to burn off the sexual tension driving them crazy?

  Or did he want more?

  She opened her eyes and smiled at her sisters. “Well, either way I’m bound to be feeling pretty content over the next couple of days. Don’t phone me, don’t text me, and for God’s sake, Lisa, do not pick this week to take advantage of my the door is always open comment. Because if you show up when I’m in the middle of something entertaining? You’re sleeping with the goats.”

  Lisa dipped her head. “I’ll agree to all your terms, except one. We expect you to send at least one text, because if I’m wrong—” She made a face. “Okay, that’s not possible. I’m never wrong, so forget I mentioned it. Text us anyway.”

  Karen smacked her in the arm. “Such a brat.”

  “You lurves me, you do.”

  Tamara did love them both. “Why is this stuff so hard? This relationship stuff, I mean.”

  Two pairs of shining eyes met hers. “So we’ll know it’s worth it in the end?” Lisa suggested.

  “So we have a reason to eat ice cream, even in the middle of winter,” was Karen’s suggestion.

  Tamara stared across the room at the man she was hoping to shove into a more than boss-and-nanny situation before the night was over. She’d always jumped in with two feet before.

  Maybe the water would be cold, but hopefully the ride after would be worth it.

  Chapter Twenty

  Lisa handed her a brightly coloured package about the size of a bottle of whiskey, but far lighter. “Don’t open it until you’re in the car on the way home,” she ordered, slipping her arms around Tamara and hugging her. “You deserve to be happy,” she told her fiercely.

  “Thanks, little sis. When you find out what bee’s up Karen’s butt, let me know, ’kay? We Whiskey Creek mice have got to stick together.”

  Lisa rolled her eyes before offering a kiss and backing away. She eyed the room until she spotted Emma, swooping in and lifting her up. “My turn for cuddles.”

  They said their goodbyes to Sasha and Emma who were buzzing with excitement to have a sleepover with extended family. Goodnight kisses and hugs and waves followed, then they were back outside, nine p.m. and a long drive ahead of them.

  A large question hovering.

  Caleb held the door for her and she climbed in, feeling a little unreal. Of all the times she wished she had the courage to jump to a conclusion, she just couldn’t.


  What if he actually wanted to go back and have some time in the house quiet-like, without the girls?

  They were barely out of town, heading south when Caleb cleared his throat awkwardly. “Sorry I didn’t warn you ahead of time.”

  “I’m surprised the girls kept it quiet as long as they did. Now I understand all the questions about chores better.”

  She watched his profile, her blood beginning to race as he swallowed, his throat moving.

  “I’ve been thinking. I’ve been thinking hard, and I don’t want to put any pressure on you, but you know that issue we had on Christmas Eve?”

  Issue? “Can you clarify what you mean, because I remember a whole bunch of things going down on Christmas Eve.”

  He cleared his throat again. “I think both you and I want the same thing when it comes to protecting the girls.” He reached across and caught hold of her fingers, and this time her heart rate tripled. “But you and I both have something else we want really bad. I thought we could meet some of those needs without complicating things for the girls.”

  Oh boy. “You want to fool around?”

  His fingers squeezed tight. “Fool around. That sounds like something we did back in high school, and I don’t mean for us to stop at kissing, or petting.”

  Oh boy again.

  It made sense, because this thing between them was so huge and combustible, she didn’t think they could deal with it by sneaking around corners and hoping for the best. But she wasn’t looking just to rub out some excitement. “Caleb, I meant it. I don’t want to hurt the girls, I’ve come to care for them, and if you and me giving into this—”

  “Violent urge to fuck?” he interjected.

  A flush of heat struck straight between her legs. “Yeah, that would be one way to put it. I don’t want to do something that’s going to make you want to fire me. The girls don’t deserve that.”

  She didn’t deserve that, but they’d stick to the girls for the moment.

  Caleb stroked his thumb over the back of her hand. “I have no intention of firing you. But we’re not ready to go from where we are to where we want to be in one day, and I can’t hold back much longer from showing you exactly how much I want you.”

  A lovely rush of endorphins washed through her system. Tamara considered it better than any high she’d reached before. “So we’re going home to let this thing between us progress to its natural conclusion.”

  He glanced over, and what she’d hoped to see earlier, all that fire and need and passion, scalded her as if she were kindling, and with one whoosh she went up in flames.

  “Okay by me,” Tamara responded.

  And then incredibly, they sat there. Holding hands in the car as he drove down the highway. Tamara wiggled in her seat as she debated the proper response. Because, yes, it would be a little crass to simply stop the truck, pull over to the side of the road and go for it.

  Then again, that wasn’t the worst idea she’d ever heard.

  Distraction. She needed a distraction.

  Her eye fell on the vibrantly wrapped present Lisa had given her, and she tore the paper away, discovering as she expected a box that would usually hold a bottle of Jameson Whiskey.

  Only when she popped open the top and removed the festive tissue paper what poured into her lap were dozens of packages of condoms. Brightly coloured, flavoured, ribbed—large.

  She shoved the wrappers back into the box as quickly as she could, latex crinkling under her fingers.

  It seemed she now had not only motive but the means.

  “Caleb?”

  He grunted in response. If she didn’t know better she’d assume he was doing something boring like looking over a tractor magazine or planning how much hay to stack in the south field.

  But a quick glance to her left showed the truth. His fingers on the wheel were white, his grip so tight she could practically hear the leather scream in protest. Maybe his legendary control wasn’t quite as unshakable as he wished.

  Oh, she certainly hoped it wasn’t.

  “Could you pull over, please?”

  He frowned. “You need a pit stop already?”

  She shook her head happily. Then she waggled one of Lisa’s Christmas presents in the air where he could see it. “I think we should start that little adventure a little sooner than waiting until we get home.”

  Caleb swore, snapping his head back to the front and focusing on the road as if she held a gun to his head. “Tamara. I’m not taking you in the goddamn truck.”

  She slid a hand up his arm, squeezing her fingers over his shoulder before sliding back down and caressing his biceps. “Why not? I have no problem giving myself to you in the truck. Or if it makes you feel better, I could take you.”

  The engine roared for a second as he hit the gas extra hard before growling at her. “We can wait.”

  But the imperturbable Caleb was fidgeting.

  Tamara eased her hips forward on the seat and undid her pants.

  He snapped a glance sideways. “Don’t do that.”

  Tamara lifted her T-shirt to expose her belly then lifted her hand to her mouth and licked her fingers before sliding her hand into her pants. Curling her knuckles so they showed against the fabric of her jeans. “Just getting warmed up.”

  He was torn, she could tell that. Eyes on the road with just enough glances to the side to know she was driving him wild. Heck, she was driving herself wild, brushing fingers over her clit steadily until a soft sound of pleasure escaped her lips unbidden.

  Caleb turned the truck off the main highway, bouncing down a dark side road toward a batch of trees.

  Tamara let a smile sneak out, lifting her hand across and offering her fingers. “Want a taste?”

  He slammed on the brakes, skidding the truck to a stop. It shimmied ninety degrees to finish parked across the dead-end road. Then he was around the vehicle, jerking open her door and releasing her seatbelt to pull her toward him. He took her lips, kissing hard and deep and fast until she was lightheaded.

  Caleb reached down and stripped off her pants, pulling them down as far as her boot tops before shoving her panties away as well. He pushed her back to the seat, jerked her hips forward and covered her with his mouth.

  Zero to sixty—the bit of warmup she’d had was nothing compared to the caress of his tongue over her sex. Feasting like a starving man, the five o’clock shadow on his cheeks rasped against her inner thighs. A sensual sandpaper forcing pleasure on her as he moved his tongue against her rapidly. Strong fingers dug into her ass as he lifted her against his mouth.

  He’d wrung an orgasm from her in no time flat, her body shaking as he grabbed for the box on the floorboards. Caleb tore open the lid, and colourful squares went flying everywhere. He had a condom open, his cock covered then he stepped up on the running boards, lined up and slid in.

  Slowly. Eyes fixed on her face as he pushed into her. Hard and hot and thick and oh, yes, it felt good.

  Tamara swore, lifting her knees. She intended to grab hold of her ankles to offer him more room, but her jeans were tangled around her boot tops, so she ended up in a weird, lopsided butterfly-position as he joined their bodies, leaving her fuller than she’d ever been.

  He closed his eyes, a shudder wracking his entire body as he gripped her hips and held them together.

  Intimate and picture-perfect. In spite of having only briefly kissed, in spite of having all their clothes on and the awkward location for their first sexual tryst, it was perfect.

  The impact of two and a half months of foreplay couldn’t be discounted.

  And when Caleb pulled his hips back, the perfection of it just continued. Tamara reached down and caught hold of his wrists so she could contribute. Clenching as he thrust forward, arching her back and sighing with contentment as he worked himself in and out of her.

  Over and over again.

  Cold air poured in the door and swirled around them as the December wind shifted over the Rocky Mountains. A glacier-kissed ice-scent
ed breeze that would normally have sent her running for shelter, but she was hot. Scorching, burning hot as he stared down, his ironclad grip controlling her hips.

  Pleasure rose again, never quiet after her first orgasm, and she let go of his hand to strum her fingers over her clit, helping matters along. Stronger, higher—

  But not quite there before he tightened from head to toe, arching against her and pulsing helplessly as he came. Release taking him and shaking him, and she couldn’t even be disappointed that she hadn’t gone two for two.

  It still felt so damn good, and unless she was mistaken, this was only round one.

  His head dipped forward, chest quivering as he breathed uneasily. “Damn.”

  Tamara sighed happily. “That pretty much sums it up.”

  He looked at her from under his brows, a small satisfied smile curling his lips. He didn’t say anything else, just leaned in and pressed his mouth to hers with a soft, tender kiss. Cold air swirled around them, his cock hard enough to be felt inside her tingling sex, and she couldn’t imagine anything better.

  Except knowing this was just the beginning.

  He wasn’t about to apologize.

  If it’d been any other woman, at any other time, Caleb would have been appalled at his lack of control. But as he put them back on the highway and headed for home, Tamara was damn near gloating in the seat next to him.

  Considering how good he felt, this wasn’t a time for apologies.

  He almost wondered if he was dreaming, though, because she’d agreed far more easily to his proposition than expected. It wasn’t as if he only wanted this for today—only for now. He still needed to take that final step and make their relationship more official. Getting there made the distance between two points seem a hell of a lot longer than it should be.

  It was like the spot out at Silver Stone where the river stood in the way, and even though the horse sheds he’d been told to go check were less than a five-minute walk apart, because of that river it was an hour unless he wanted to get wet.

  Unless he wanted to face the rapids that could twirl him around and possibly send him reeling.