Magnus and a Love Beyond Words

by Knightley, Diana

  We had the dock to ourselves, though there were boats sprinkled across the loch’s surface, and men fishing in the glorious weather.

  I stripped my boots off and then my woolen socks and stuffed them inside.

  Magnus took off his leather boots and placed them beside mine.

  I got close to the edge, clutched his arm, and knelt to dip my toes in. “Cold! So cold!”

  Magnus grinned and dropped beside me and dangled his feet in the water. “When we would go fishin’, tae ensure we would catch a great haul of fish, we had a tradition tae throw someone in the water. Twas the spring when I was eight-years-auld and I dinna ken twas my turn. Uncle Baldie and some other men crept up behind, picked me up, and tossed me over.”

  My eyes were wide. “It must have been freezing!”

  He laughed, “Aye, twas nae warm like this.”

  “What did you do?”

  “I tried tae breathe until they pulled me from the loch and then I tried tae laugh so they would think I had the strength tae bear it. Then I tried nae tae shiver in my wet clothes. Twas a difficult day and I was feelin’ verra ill-used until Baldie came tae fish beside me and said tae me, low, so only I could hear, ‘Last year we sent Malcolm over the side and he carried on like a bairn for the rest of the day. I am proud of ye, Young Magnus.’ After that twas a verra good day.”

  “That does sound like a good day.”

  We both lost our thoughts to the sparkling surface of the freezing cold water. I said, “When I was a kid I swore that I would always jump into the lake first thing without thinking about it, but here I am breaking that rule, cannon-balling into this ice water is out of the question.”

  “Aye, also the men of the castle would be aghast at your brazenness. I haena got it in me tae fight them all.”

  I nudged against his shoulder and dropped my head there. “I don’t want you to have to fight over things like that. Not anymore.”

  “Nae anymore, mo ghradh.” He kissed the top of my head.

  I swung my feet back-and-forth splashing water-sprinkles on our clothes.

  “I know I said it before but this is all really beautiful and I can imagine a little Magnus running on the hills here, chasing Sean, splashing through the freezing water—”

  “Fishin’.”

  I nodded. “Fishing.” I added with a smile, “For trout.”

  He grinned. “Your arse is all better now, m’lady?”

  “Much.” He put his hand on mine and we entwined our fingers and both looked out over the wide, gently glistening loch.

  “I wish I could stay here with you. We could live here in this castle...”

  Magnus said, “Let your eyes follow the loch as far as ye can see, farther still is a small house on a lake in Maine in a new world called America. We should live there: Magnus, Kaitlyn, and our bairn.”

  “I would like that. I would really like that a lot.”

  “Tell me when ye get tae my hospital bed. Tell me tis what we should do and I will make it happen. I promise ye, I will.”

  Tears spilled from my eyes and rolled down my cheeks. I ducked my head to his shoulder and held his bushy, bearded jaw and brought his lips to mine and kissed him with tear-glistened skin and wet lips.

  “I could stay. You think this is past your control, but we can—”

  His cheek was close to my lips, his breath on my skin. “Nae, I ken this is the right decision.”

  “Do you want me to spend the night? We could make love one last...”

  He ran his fingers through a tendril of hair hanging by my face, then brushed his fingers down my cheek, concentrating on the places where my skin met his. “I fear, mo reul-iuil, it might break me completely tae say goodbye after... I couldna bear it.”

  He kissed me then pulled away. “Twould be easier tae do it now than later...”

  I enclosed his hand in both of mine and brought it to my lips and kissed it. I watched his face while he stared out over the lake.

  After a long time he asked, “Where do ye think I will go?”

  “I don’t know.” My face was covered in tears. “But you deserve the best place, wherever it is.”

  He pulled his hand from mine and stood. “We should go. The weather is goin’ tae turn and...”

  I dried my feet on the bottom of my skirts. Then Magnus and I both held onto each other for balance while we pulled on our boots.

  Chapter 10

  We walked quietly down the dock to the castle following the path around the walls and passed through the gate to get my bag. Then we walked along the causeway, warm in the sun. I had been overusing the word beautiful today, but it all was, like being immersed in a movie — full of extra special effects, vivid colors, and more details. Even the sounds were lovely: water lapping, grass rustling, bugs and birds. My breathing was louder but nature put up a good fight for dominance. And the smells: the Scottish breeze rolling across the land mingling with loch and castle and stable and as we ascended to a grassy hilltop, the smell of the upper levels of air, clear and crisp and cool. A cloud crossed in front of the sun and when the cloud danced away the warm sun baked the air around us the smell warm and friendly.

  My hand in Magnus’s, protected and loved. I really didn’t want to go. I didn’t know how I was going to leave him.

  The more we walked the more tears rolled down my cheeks, until I was a blithering, sobbing, wet mess.

  We came to a small crest on one of the lower hills with a stand of trees blocking us from the view of the castle. Magnus pulled to a stop. “I should put your knives on ye.” He pulled two knives from my backpack. I raised my skirts and he strapped one to my upper thigh and the other to my waist. He paused for a moment with his hands on my hips and then shook out of it and dug through the bag some more.

  I said, “I’ll leave my bag for you, there’s not much. Some matches. We ate all the food, I’m sorry.”

  “Ye daena need tae be sorry.”

  “You always say that.”

  He smiled sadly. “Tis always true.”

  “Not always, like now, this here — this is awful. I can’t leave you.”

  He brushed hair from my cheek and tucked it behind my ear. “You can, ye must. I need ye so much, mo reul-iuil. I ken tis hard but I need ye.”

  I sobbed and nodded. “Okay. I know. I love you though, so much. I would never leave you if I didn’t have to.”

  “I ken how much ye love me, because ye are willin’ tae leave me tae save me.” He dropped his forehead to mine. “I thank ye for it.”

  “What if I can’t save you? What if I can’t stop all the fighting or the bloodshed or the danger? What if it’s all the same?”

  “It might be, but ye will be with me through it.”

  I nodded and sniffled and leaned forward pressing my forehead into his beard against his chest. “I love you so much this hurts.”

  “Aye.” His arms held around me, pulling me close to his chest. “Aye,” he said it again.

  He added, whispering into my hair, “You have given me a gift with your life Kaitlyn, and I am so grateful for it.”

  I pulled my arms in and let him really hold me, protective and strong. I said, my voice small and weak, “I’m grateful for your life too.” I cried in his arms for a very long time while we clung to each other on a hillside in Scotland, the shores of his childhood home, in the way, way long ago past, just before I left him, in this time, forever.

  Finally I pulled away and brushed my hair from my face. “I need a napkin.” Then, “What the hell, it’s a mess, anyway.” I pulled my skirts up and blew my nose and wiped my face on the inside. It smelled like horse and sadness and the dirt of centuries.

  I dropped the hem, straightened my skirts, and smoothed them as if somehow I could become presentable though I was a splotchy, swollen, filthy, broken-hearted mess.

  Magnus dug the two vessels we owned out of his sporran and handed them both to me.

  “You won’t keep one, just in case?”

  “Nae
. I daena want tae use it.”

  “Okay, yeah, that makes sense.”

  He told me the numbers to add, the order, to include this castle and his castle in the future. I repeated them back to him twice, to make sure I had them all. Then he said, “The castle will be in turmoil. There are factions loyal to Samuel who fought against my ascension, I daena think ye should trust anyone but Hammond Donahoe. Demand tae see him and convince him tae keep ye safe and bring ye tae me.”

  “Okay. I will. Is there anything else you need, that you needed to know, that I can tell you?”

  “Tell me I need Quentin.”

  “But we can’t go to Florida?”

  “Aye, General Reyes will be there, but tell me tae figure it out. Tell me tae get Quentin and Tyler’s list and tae figure out how tae defeat General Reyes.”

  I nodded.

  “And tell me ye love me again.”

  I brushed my fingers down the side of his cheek, the length of his beard. “I do, I love you so much. I don’t think in the history of the world there is anyone that has loved someone as much as I love you.”

  He shook his head. “Tell me when ye see me. I will be needin’ tae hear it.”

  Then he said, “I will go sit over there while ye jump.”

  Tears welled up again and speaking was impossible.

  He kissed my hairline and turned, scooping my pack up and walking about ten yards away. It hurt to watch him with his back turned, his footsteps carrying him farther, and farther still.

  Instead I looked at the vessel. I twisted the ends of it and brought it humming to life.

  I burst into tears, more tears, streaming down my face. I looked across the hillside at Magnus. “I can’t leave you. Don’t make me.”

  Magnus’s voice carried across the Scottish hills, “I canna live without ye, mo reul-iuil. Please go tae me.”

  I sobbed and said I love you one last time.

  I clutched the vessel to my chest and kept my eyes locked on his across the way, standing still and solid like the mountain he grew up beside. I turned the dial and said the numbers. The storm grew above me as the wind rose around me and the force of the jump slammed into me and tore me through time.

  Chapter 11

  I was yanked to standing between four men. There was one security floodlight on the high rooftop, but my eyes were blinded. It’s how I figured I had arrived at the castle, because other than that I was simply raw nerves and fear.

  Behind me an explosion blasted so loud I had to clap my hands to my ears. All the sounds were deafeningly loud. Someone shoved me from behind causing me to stumble and bang my knee. I was pulled to my feet and forced to walk.

  I mumbled, “Hammond Donahoe…” My head felt wobbly on my neck, it was hard to see, and my ears were buzzing from the noise.

  “Where are you taking me?” My voice wasn’t much more than a whimper. “Where?” My head lolled forward as they unceremoniously grabbed me by the underarms and dragged me down the hall. “Hammond Donahoe?” I managed to say again.

  At the end of a long hall a door opened. I decided to struggle, but the soldiers overpowered and shoved me in. The door slid shut and I was alone.

  * * *

  The room was small and bare. A bed stood to one side, exactly like the room Donnan imprisoned me in. I recoiled to the door and banged, three weak bangs. “I need to speak to Hammond, please.”

  An outside explosion rattled the windows of my room. Through the door I heard footsteps run down the halls, more footsteps ran the other direction. I needed to lie down. Loud gunfire emitted from the ground outside. I ran to the window to see.

  I was about eight stories above the dark landscape, but there was a fire on the horizon and to the left three vehicles raced along a road. Footsteps pounded by my room again.

  I went back to the door and banged. “Someone! Anyone! I need to see Hammond Donahoe!” I pressed my ear to the door. The hallway sounded empty. “Anyone?”

  I stumbled to the bed and collapsed on it. I didn’t want to touch it — who knew what kind of berserker things had happened here? I wasn’t going to sleep; I had too much to do, but I couldn’t stand anymore.

  * * *

  I woke to another loud explosion. Furious with myself for falling asleep, I crept into the bathroom and yanked open every drawer and cabinet looking for something, anything, a weapon, some food, some freaking clean clothes. It was wishful thinking though, everything was bare.

  I drank water from the faucet. My hands were really disgusting and there wasn’t any soap.

  When my eyes looked at my reflection in the mirror a memory flashed: punching the mirror, collecting a shard, murdering the king. His naked shoulder against my mouth, bucking as he died.

  I was imprisoned again.

  I didn’t know for sure if they realized who I was or if they threw me in jail to deal with me later. I only knew my position was precarious. If Lady Mairead learned I was here, she would come and I would have to deal with her without Magnus to protect me.

  Gunfire rang out nearby, glass shattered from one of the floors above. I peeked out the bathroom, raced across the room, sank to the floor beside the bed, and curled into a ball. I covered my ears, waiting for someone to remember I was here.

  * * *

  A small panel slid open within my door and a plate of food was unceremoniously thrust into my hands. “Please tell Hammond Donahoe I’m here, please, Hammond Donahoe!” I yelled as the door slid shut. Footsteps ran away down the hall. It would be nice if they were running to go tell him, but it seemed much more likely they were running to or from a battle. More gunfire from the end of the hall. Great, whatever was going on had breached the building.

  There was a possibility this room was actually the safest place for me right now.

  But that was also cold comfort.

  Like the food: cold, leathery meat and bread with a small smear of butter. A paper cup for water from the tap, finally.

  * * *

  I slept some more and tried to conjure a plan beyond: lay here and wait for Hammond to stumble on me... And where was Magnus? The hospital. Was he safe? He survived this once already, but hadn’t my arrival given it all a new trajectory?

  What if he died?

  What if this was one of those looping-back-on-yourself-makes-shit-go-screwy kind of things?

  And was the Magnus in the past gone now? Had I killed him by leaving him?

  And it was all a moot point: someone had confiscated my vessels. I couldn’t go back now.

  * * *

  Hours passed. It sounded like the battles outside were escalating. There were drones and helicopters buzzing all around. The noise was deafening.

  My door slid open. A thin man entered looking harried and confused. His uniform looked important because it was covered in medals.

  “Are you Hammond?”

  “I am not. I am Lewis, First Lieutenant. Explain to me where you got the vessels?”

  “I was given them. Whose side are you on, Magnus’s side? I don’t know so I’m not talking to you.”

  “I’m on the side of the crown.”

  I folded my arms across my chest to look firm. “I’m still not talking to you. I want to talk to Hammond Donahoe.”

  “Understand this, Kaitlyn Campbell, you won’t be the one making demands. You are under arrest for the murder of King Donnan the second.”

  Crap. He knew my name.

  I reminded myself: don’t talk about Magnus, don’t talk to anyone. “I’m not making demands. I’m simply stating I won’t speak to anyone but Hammond Donahoe. If he comes, I’ll tell him how I got the vessels. I won’t tell anyone else.”

  I tried to glare straight ahead. I got the distinct impression he wanted to punch me. I tried to ready myself as I continued to glare.

  Finally he said, “Suit yourself. The castle is going to fall anyway, and Magnus won’t survive the night. You’ll have no king to protect you. Hell, we don’t even have to feed you.” He turned for the door.
/>
  “What do you mean Magnus won’t—?”

  The door slid closed behind him.

  Magnus wouldn’t survive the night.

  I banged on the door. “Let me out! I need to talk to Hammond!” I tried to control my breaths. I banged again and yelled more. And banged more. Then I yelled even more.

  Chapter 12

  A helicopter flew very close to the window; the glass vibrated. I dropped to my knees and huddled there. What if that sonic window blast thing happened again?

  The door opened.

  A man, big, a little like a football player who had gone soft from his athletic youth, barged in. He was wearing a soldier uniform in a dark gray camouflage-pattern with gold accents. His left chest was covered in medals. He crossed the room, yanked the shade on the window aside, looked out, then let the shade drop back.

  “I’m Hammond Donahoe. You have two minutes.” His hair and short beard were red, his cheeks round like he might laugh, sometimes, but he had that pale skin tone that flushed red when angry and right now he looked furious.

  He hadn’t really looked at me and I was relieved at that. I wished I had figured out some way to put on better clothes. I needed to make a case that I was worth saving while my life and Magnus’s life hung in the balance.

  “I’m Kaitlyn Campbell, I was sent here by Magnus. I mean, you know about the vessels right — the time travel machines?”

  “I do.”

  The fact he was listening made me gather my wits to make a better case. “Good, so Magnus sent me. I was with him four years in the future. He was the king at the time, and he told me to come here to this time. I need to see him in the hospital. He wants me to.”

  Hammond’s expression was skeptical. “I’m supposed to believe this story?”