Finding Our Forever: (A Defining Moments Novel)

by Andee Michelle

  “Why don’t you come over to the house? We can watch movies and just hang out.”

  “I think that’s probably a good idea. It seems as though we have some things to talk about too,” I reply, lifting her hand to my mouth and kissing it before opening her car door for her to get in.

  “I’ll meet you at my place then,” she says and smiles up at me.

  THE WHOLE DRIVE to Sara’s house, I can’t stop thinking about what she said. We really need to talk about her leaving more. I need to just lay it out there and hope she feels the same way. It sounds as though she does, but I don’t want there to be any misunderstandings about what’s going on with us or where our relationship is going once she leaves.

  I pull up in front of her house a few minutes later and she’s already getting out of her car. I meet her at the front door, and when she opens it, Diesel lets out a whimper from somewhere in the house and Sara freezes.

  “Diesel,” she yells into the house but is only met with another whimper. I whisper to Sara to stay outside, but she shakes her head and pushes her way into the house, once again yelling for him.

  We follow the whimper to the back of the kitchen and find him lying in front of the slightly opened refrigerator.

  “Ah, Diesel,” Sara huffs. “Not again!” She sits down beside him and starts rubbing his belly, which makes him groan.

  “What’s going on? What’s wrong with him,” I ask quickly.

  “He got into the refrigerator and ate a bunch of crap he shouldn’t have,” she tells me as she stands and opens the fridge door all the way. I watch as she looks through the contents left inside.

  “So, he ate my leftover Chinese food from last night, the half a pound of lunch meat and half a pound of cheese I bought yesterday, and chewed up a container of mustard. He has a belly ache for sure.” Her voice is muffled due to her head being stuck in the fridge.

  “I don’t think any of that stuff will hurt him, but he’s probably not going to feel good for a little while,” I reply, gently rubbing his belly. He farts so loud that Sara jerks her head out of the fridge and looks at me as if I did it. The smell about knocks me over.

  “Don’t look at me like that. That was your dog,” I laugh out. She looks down at Diesel and shakes her head.

  “Poor guy.” She reaches down and pats his head. “I’ll go get the medicine the vet gave me last time he did this.” I watch her rush down the hallway and into the bathroom. Sitting down beside Diesel, I rub his tummy gently, causing him to squirm a bit. He’s so uncomfortable.

  “Here we go,” she says out loud but more to herself. She pulls out a bag of treats from the cabinet beside the fridge, removes one, and shoves a tiny pill into it. “See if you can get him to eat that,” she tells me while sitting down on the floor on the other side of him.

  When he smells the treat in my hand, he lifts his head only far enough to prop it up on my knee and give me the big puppy-dog eyes. I put the treat in front of his mouth and he groans and licks it. I chuckle because I can tell he wants to eat it, but his tummy hurts and so he’s trying to decide if eating it will be worth the additional pain. Little does he know it should help. Poor guy.

  He eventually eats the treat and falls asleep, farting every few minutes. We sit, avoiding our earlier discussion, and chat as we keep an eye on him to make sure his discomfort doesn’t get too bad. An hour or so later, he’s snoring and not groaning anymore, so we assume it’s safe that he’ll pull through.

  Ben texted me a few minutes ago and asked me if I was coming home tonight. Said he’d bought Thai food and would be hanging out at home if I was up for a guys’ night. Our relationship hasn’t been right since mom’s accident and I need to fix it.

  Kissing Sara and telling her goodnight seems weird because it’s still light outside and usually, if we spend the day together, it ends up being an all-nighter, or I go home super late. Now that school is out for the summer, I foresee a lot more all-nighters, although we have both avoided the serious discussion we need to have since Diesel sidetracked us.

  When I get home, Ben is spread out across the couch watching baseball and shoveling Pad Thai into his mouth with chopsticks. I freaking love Pad Thai.

  “Dude, I’m gonna jump in the shower real quick. Don’t eat it all!” I yell as I rush to the bathroom, stripping off clothes as I go.

  I make quick work of the shower and throw on a pair of basketball shorts. When I walk back into the living room, Ben is rubbing his belly and groaning.

  “Did you save me any?” I chuckle as I make my way around the couch.

  “Yep,” he mumbles and lifts his hand toward the containers on the coffee table.

  “Damn, Ben. Were you hungry? That’s a lot of damn food.”

  “I was starving, and I wasn’t sure if you’d bring Sara home with you, so I bought enough for all of us.” His tone seems a little off, but I don’t point it out.

  I grab a carton and a set of chopsticks and squeeze some lime over the noodles and sprinkle on a little cilantro. My mouth is watering before I even put the first mouthful in.

  Between bites, I manage to ask Ben about how things are going with Ramzi, but he just grumbles under his breath and ignores the question.

  We watch more baseball, eat more Pad Thai, and just hang out like we used too. It’s nice. No heavy discussions about family drama. Just brothers kicking it.

  “Oh, I forgot to tell you. Destry will be back in three weeks. We need to decide on the bigger apartment or the house,” he says quickly before adding, “I personally think having a house would be better for us.” Although I enjoy having the onsite gym and pool, I’m definitely over the idiots who live above us stomping around at all hours and the pothead down the hall who basically gives everybody on this floor a contact high on a daily basis.

  Ben went and looked at a three-bedroom apartment and a three-bedroom house earlier this week while I was in finals. His opinion, which I trust completely, makes sense. The house is 1800 square feet and the apartment is 1200. The house makes sense with so much more room.

  “I trust your judgment, Ben. The house it is,” I reply without a second thought. That makes Ben smile.

  “Thank God. I really didn’t want to live in another apartment,” he says with a sigh.

  THE PAST THREE weeks have flown by. Ben wasted no time at all getting the first month’s rent and deposit put down on the house before anyone could change their mind. Not that we would have. It took a couple of friends, a lot of pizza and beer, and two days to get all of our shit moved from the apartment into the new house, but it went smoothly and I’m glad I listened to Ben. The house is awesome and so much quieter. We’ve only been in the new place a week, and we’ve already had the couple who lives next door stop by and welcome us to the neighborhood with a homemade pie. I think we’ll like this place just fine.

  Sara and I have continued to spend time together, and although I know I shouldn’t let myself get attached to her more, it’s out of my hands. I fall a little more every day, and I find myself missing her when we aren’t together and thinking about her basically all the time. I know I’m setting myself up for a fall when she leaves, but I just can’t help it. She’s perfect and I have no idea what the hell I’m doing. The closer it gets to her leaving, the need for us to discuss what will happen when she leaves becomes more important.

  I’m flying to Boise this evening, helping Destry pack up a small trailer and driving back with him in a few days. As much as I love spending time with Sara, I know the summer is quickly losing steam, and soon enough, she’ll be gone. I’ve never felt this way about anyone and it scares the shit out of me. Getting away for a couple of days will hopefully help me sort out my feelings so that we can make time to figure this out.

  She’s dropping me off at the airport because Ben said he had something to do. He was dressed in a suit, which he does often these days, but I’ve learned not to ask questions because he just gets irritated and tells me to mind my own business. I know my brother. He�
��s up to something, but he’ll only tell me when he’s damn good and ready. We’re definitely the same in that aspect. I still find it hard to talk to my brothers about my relationship, or lack thereof, with Sara.

  After she pulls up to the unloading area at the airport, she gets out of the car long enough to kiss me.

  “Have fun with Destry,” she tells me sweetly. “Text me when you get there.”

  “I will,” I reply, hugging her to me tightly. “I’ll miss you.”

  She nods but doesn’t respond before she kisses me again quickly, gets in the car, and drives away.

  She didn’t respond and made a hasty departure.

  And now I feel like a giant pansy because I’m disappointed she didn’t tell me she’d miss me too. I mean, it’s only a couple of days, but still. I toss my carry-on over my shoulder and head into the airport.

  A few days away from each other to figure out our next step, that’s exactly what we need.

  THE FLIGHT IS QUICK and Destry is at the security gates when I come through. It’s only been a couple months since I saw him last, but it is so good to see him and know he’s coming home for good.

  He hugs me the second I get to him and then smacks me on the back, hard.

  “So, how are things going with Sara?” he blurts out.

  “What the hell, Dez? You don’t even ask how I’m doing first? Do you have a crush on Sara or something?” I reply with a smirk.

  “Hell yeah. She’s smoking hot,” he points out. “I mean, that tiny little body and that fiery red hair. Can’t cook worth a shit, but I bet she’s feisty in the sack, huh?”

  I growl in response. Yes, growl. At my brother. Who then laughs so loud everyone within twenty yards turns and stares at us.

  “I knew it. You’re so screwed,” he announces, before throwing his arm over my shoulder and steering me toward the doors.

  I am screwed.

  I don’t want to be tied down at twenty years old.

  I want to finish school first.

  I want to travel a little before I settle down.

  I want to enjoy my youth and do what I want when I want.

  So, why for the love of all that’s holy, can I not make myself allow our “relationship” to be a casual, friends-with-benefits thing?

  And as if a light bulb came on above my head, I stop. Her strange attitude at the airport. Her not telling me she’ll miss me. Her hasty departure.

  She’s distancing herself from me. But why would she do that now? She doesn’t leave for a few more weeks.

  “What are you doing, dude? We’re almost to the car.” Destry continues toward the parking area and I follow behind him, digging in my bag, trying to find my phone.

  As soon as we’re settled in his car, I text her.

  Me: Hey babe. I made it to Boise.

  I press send and set the phone in the cup holder beside me.

  “What’s going on, Eli? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he asks with no hesitation.

  “Nothing. I’m good. What are we doing tonight?” I ask him quickly, trying to change the subject.

  He squints his eyes at me but lets me get away with it. Starting the car and pulling out of the parking lot, he finally answers. “Well, I’ve been staying at a friend’s place and it’s too small for visitors really, so we’re heading to a friend’s house to watch the Rockies game. I figured we’d just kick it, order some pizza, and enjoy some guy time,” he tells me with a huge smile.

  And now I feel like an asshole because I should be enjoying this time with my brother. I mean, I’ve only seen him twice in the past six months and both times we were so busy we didn’t really get to spend a whole lot of time together.

  “That sounds perfect, Dez.”

  We chat about how his summer has been and how ready he is to get back home. Although Boise is a beautiful city and I can definitely see the appeal of living here, our home is in Colorado. By the time we make it to his friend’s place, it’s less than an hour until the game starts. I drop my bag in the living room and we head out.

  I glance at my phone every once in a while but still haven’t heard from Sara. Dez and I stop and grab the pizzas on the way to his buddy’s house, and by the time we get there, the game is just starting.

  When he doesn’t knock on the door and just walks right in, I’m thinking he must know this friend pretty damn well. As we head into the kitchen, I’m looking around the house, noticing that it seems quite feminine.

  And then I see why.

  In the kitchen stands a tall, blonde woman, built like a brick shithouse, wearing a short denim skirt, a white tank top, and no shoes. Her hair is up in a messy knot on top of her head. When she turns around, her face is full actress-style makeup, and she’s really pretty.

  My first thought is: I can’t believe this is the type of girl I used to always go after. My second thought is: Yep, my little brother has skills!

  “Eli, this is Tynlee. Tynlee, my brother Eli,” he introduces us without even looking at either of us. He’s already looking through her fridge for beer.

  “Jesus. Y’all’s mama makes pretty babies,” she purrs and struts toward me with a huge smile on her face. Flirty little thing.

  She slinks right up and hugs me as if she’s known me her whole life. My whole body stiffens when she presses herself up against me and she must feel it because she jumps back and apologizes.

  “I’m sorry. I’m a hugger. I guess when you’re brought up in a small Georgia town where you’re related to almost everybody, you hug a lot.” She giggles and then sticks out her hand to shake mine. I grab her hand gently, but she shakes back with the strength of any normal guy.

  “It’s nice to meet you, Tynlee,” I reply, withdrawing my hand and walking toward my baby brother who has some explaining to do.

  He sees the look on my face and jerks his head toward what I presume is the living room because I can hear yelling.

  “Dude, you didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend,” I mumble under my breath to Dez.

  He chuckles before replying, “She is not my girlfriend, Eli. Not even close.” I watch his face change though, and it looks as though he wants to say something more but a huge mountain of a man steps up and smacks him on the back, almost knocking the pizza boxes out of his hands.

  “This must be Eli,” the mountain interrupts, sticking his hand out to shake mine. I’m not a small guy, but this guy is two of me. I’m afraid he’ll break my hand if I shake it.

  “That’s me,” I reply, trying to steel my hand for impact.

  “Eli, this is Will. As you can see, he is our center,” Dez laughs out.

  “Hey, I’m on a diet. Tyn is making me a salad right now,” he jokes. Maybe she’s his girlfriend.

  “Nice to meet you, Will.” I shake his hand strongly and am happy that his grip doesn’t fit the size of his hands. The guy has to be close to seven-foot tall and over 300 pounds.

  Destry introduces me to a couple of other guys as Tynlee strides into the room carrying two trays of finger food—hot wings, mozzarella sticks, chips and salsa, and a bunch of cut up fruit. No salad.

  “So, Eli, what’s your major?” Tynlee asks me. I almost lie to her because I haven’t talked to Destry about it yet. I guess now is as good a time as any.

  “Well, I actually just changed my major,” I start to explain and watch as Destry’s left eyebrow lifts in question. “Psychology with an education minor. I want to be a school counselor.” I watch as the slow grin appears on Dez’s face. He’s probably one of the only people who knows how much I really loved being at that camp.

  “So, you like kids?” Tynlee asks, her face lighting up.

  “I do like kids. Other people’s kids,” I laugh out.

  She looks at me for a moment longer and it’s kind of awkward. One of the other guys, Tyson I think his name is, pulls her down onto his lap and whispers in her ear, causing her to turn red and giggle.

  Okay, so Tyson is her boyfriend.

  We watch the game
and eat, the guys throwing in jabs at Dez about leaving them every once in a while. It’s all in good humor, but I can tell it bothers them that he’s leaving. It’s nice to know he enjoyed his time here.

  I head toward the kitchen to grab another beer and almost choke when I walk in on Tynlee with her legs wrapped around Will’s waist, kissing the hell out of him.

  They must hear me because she drops her legs and pushes her skirt back down, her cheeks instantly turning red.

  “Sorry, big man,” I mumble to Will, who just smirks and goes back to kissing the hell out of her. I grab a beer for me and a Pepsi for Destry. Apparently Will and Tynlee aren’t too worried about Tyson catching them because they ignore me and just continue on with their make-out session.

  Just as I make it back into the living room, my phone chimes with an incoming text.

  Jesus, it’s about time.

  I pull my phone out of my pocket and see that it’s from Sara.

  Sara: Sorry, baby. Got called into work at the last minute. I have to work tonight and tomorrow night so I’ll be sleeping during the day the next two days. Enjoy your time there and call me when you get home. <3

  I start to reply but notice Tyson getting up and heading toward the kitchen with one of the other guys. Oh shit.

  I don’t have time to stop them, so I wait to hear the brawl break out. When I don’t hear it, I make my way toward the kitchen to make sure no one is dead. Plus, I’m nosey. I don’t really understand the dynamic of what is going on here.

  When I round the corner, I literally choke. Will is no longer in the kitchen and Tynlee is doing dishes with Tyson pressed up against her from behind, kissing her neck.

  I cough to let them know I’m in the room, but Tyson continues to grind on her and she continues to let him. I grab some paper towels to give me a reason for coming back in here when I hear a soft girly giggle before I hear her voice.

  “You’re welcome to join in on this if you want,” I hear Tyson chuckle. I jerk my head around to see who he’s talking to and am met with Tynlee’s blue eyes and sassy smirk. She is turned around facing Tyson as he grinds against her and her eyes are on me.