The Man I Need

by Williams, Shanora

  I laugh, and several seconds later, silence rains down on us. From where we are, I can hear the ocean roaring, the waves crashing.

  I notice a moment later her breathing has evened out.

  “Gabby?” I whisper, but she doesn’t respond. “How the hell did you fall asleep that fast?” I mumble, more so to myself than to her.

  I slide her up to the pillows and cover her with the comforter.

  Tomorrow will be a long day, shopping for some food and hitting the beach, so I decide to go to sleep too, but not without having her in my arms.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Gabby

  “Are you serious right now? Jet skiing?” I shriek.

  Marcel looks me in the eyes with a wicked smirk. “Serious as a heart attack.”

  “I’ve never done that before! Sounds kind of intimidating!” And it really does. Jet skiing has never even crossed my mind as an activity I’d like to do.

  “I haven’t either, but we won’t know what it’s like until we try, will we?”

  I shake my head as I collect the pieces of my bathing suit. “Okay, but if I end up falling off and bitten by a shark, I’ll be blaming you.”

  He lets out a deep laugh as I enter the bathroom. “That’s funny. I’ll keep that in mind if I see any shark fins.”

  * * *

  In less than two hours, we’re standing on the beach, listening to the instructor tell us about our life vests and other jet-skiing information. Once we’ve strapped on our vests, we’re taken to two sit-down jet skis. I choose the red one while Marcel takes the blue.

  “Make sure you keep your hands on the handle bars at all times,” the instructor, a young woman with a razor haircut named Yolanda, says. “And keep your feet on the foot rests. You can now start up your jet ski.” She reaches forward to turn the ignition of mine on, and when it comes to life and vibrates beneath me, I let out a small yelp.

  Marcel smiles way too hard about it as he starts his up.

  I give him a playful stink-eye.

  “All right, now we’re going to very slowly push the throttle. I say very slowly because some people will press down on it and fall right off,” Yolanda laughs. I push on the throttle, and the jet ski propels forward just a bit.

  “Oh my gosh! Look! I’m doing it!” I scream.

  “Good! Once you feel comfortable, you can increase your speed!” Yolanda yells after me.

  After Yolanda assists Marcel, she goes back to get a jet ski for herself. Marcel meets up to me, grinning like a child who just scored a bucket of candy.

  “What’d I tell you? You have nothing to worry about!” he yells.

  I laugh then press on the throttle, giving the jet ski a little more speed. I don’t give it too much, still warming up to the idea of this machine, but once I feel like I have the hang of it, I press on it a bit more.

  Marcel has clearly gotten the hang of it, because he races past me, belting out a laugh as he does. I’m pretty sure he’s done this before. He’s too good at it.

  If I weren’t so afraid to fall off and get eaten by a sea creature, I would race him. Instead, I laugh and keep going. It’s a lovely experience: the sun on my skin, the wind breezing by, droplets of the blue ocean water kissing my warm skin as I ride in circles.

  I don’t think I ever would have done something like this in my old life.

  Yes, I say my old life, because that is over now. Kyle is in the past, and what I thought was a life with him was merely a prison.

  But this—this is joy.

  I watch the man I love riding on his jet ski, his grin stretching from ear to ear.

  He’s so damn handsome.

  So full of life.

  When our time is up, we head back to shore with Yolanda and unstrap our life vests. As I hit the shore, though, a slight wave of seasickness hits me. I cover my mouth and steady myself.

  “Oh, yeah. If you need to throw up, just go right ahead. I’ve had many people do it after a jet ski ride,” Yolanda announces with a little laugh.

  I shake my head and hold it back as Marcel walks up to me, placing a hand on the small of my back.

  “I’m okay,” I assure him.

  “You sure?”

  “Yeah. I think I went a little too fast on that thing.” I huff a laugh, and he wraps an arm around my shoulders, leading the way to the towels we laid down prior to jet skiing. He helps me sit, and I sigh as I lie down, glad my sunglasses are blocking most of the sunlight.

  Marcel takes the spot beside me on his towel, his hands planted behind him as he watches the ocean. From where I lay, the roaring sound of the ocean is soothing. I close my eyes, hoping the seasickness will pass.

  “That was fun though, huh?” he asks, and I hear the smile in his voice.

  “Yeah, it was. I loved it.”

  “I’m gonna go in the water for a little bit.” I look over, and Marcel is standing now. He drops a kiss on my forehead then walks toward the ocean. I watch him enter the water, showing off that chiseled body of his before dropping the back of my head on the towel again.

  When twenty minutes have passed and the nausea doesn’t let up, I stand up and walk to the ocean, where Marcel is standing with his hands on his waist at the shore.

  “Hey, I think I’m gonna go back to the room. I’m still feeling sick.”

  He looks me over, concern swimming in his blue eyes. “Okay. I’ll go with you.”

  After packing up, we make our way back to the hotel. I hit the shower first thing and lie down after changing clothes, feeling a little better.

  “Take a nap. You’ll probably feel better after.” Marcel tugs a shirt over his head after his shower. “My sister used to get really sick from too much sun, believe it or not.”

  “Really? I’ve never heard of that. Hopefully I can sleep this off.”

  “Okay. I’m going to grab somethin’ to eat. Want me to bring anything back? Somethin’ to drink, maybe?”

  “No, I’m good.”

  “Okay. Just checkin’.” He grabs his hotel key card and heads to the door. “Rest up. I’ll be back.”

  When he’s gone, I sigh and close my eyes. But they pop right open again when another wave of nausea hits me. I push out of bed, running to the toilet, throwing up the delicious breakfast that I shared with Marcel this morning, only hours ago.

  “Oh, God. What is going on?” I groan.

  I stand, wiping my mouth with a towel. As I curl in bed again, though, a thought occurs to me, and that thought alone makes my heart drop to my damn stomach.

  I reach for my phone, snatching it up and checking one of my apps.

  “Holy shit,” I breathe, sitting up straight. “Holy shit. No, no, no.”

  I scramble out of bed, sliding into a pair of flip flops and grabbing the spare hotel key and my wallet.

  Marcel won’t be back for a while, so I take the elevator down and rush through the lobby, going to the pharmacy across the street.

  I grab a box of what I need, check out, then scurry back to my hotel, riding up to my room. Marcel isn’t back yet and I’m relieved, but only for now.

  I tear the box open before even getting to the bathroom, read the instructions, and do as told.

  I wait several minutes, biting my thumbnail anxiously as I sit on the edge of the bathroom counter. When the timer goes off, I hop down and snatch up the pregnancy test.

  I cannot believe my eyes.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Gabby

  I’m pregnant?

  That’s what the test says, but it has yet to register.

  How? This can’t be right.

  But your period is late, my mind chants.

  “Oh my God.” I cup my mouth, staring at the test. As I gawk at it, I hear the door of our hotel open and close.

  “Gabby?” Marcel calls.

  “In the bathroom,” I call back.

  His voice is closer as he asks, “Everything okay?”

  “Yeah.” I try to keep my voice chipper, but it wavers an
d as if he senses it, he becomes quiet.

  “Need me to get you anything? Maybe run to the pharmacy for some medicine?”

  Oh, I’ve already run to the pharmacy. Everything I need to know about what’s going on with me is right in my damn hands.

  “No, I’m okay.”

  I throw the box away in the trash, making sure to cover it with heaps of tissue. I wrap the pregnancy test up in a wad of tissue too, then tuck it in my sports bra.

  I know I have to tell him. I can’t continue this trip with him with something so heavy on my mind. He’ll want to drink, and I’ll turn the drinks down. He’ll wonder why.

  I open the door of the bathroom, and Marcel is sitting on the edge of the bed. He looks worried, or like he’s thinking about something. He peers up at me when the door is open, and that worry vanishes as he stands.

  “Everything okay in there?” he asks, stepping closer.

  I twist my fingers, sighing. “Not really. Can we, um…can we take a walk?”

  “Yeah, sure.” He looks at me oddly. “We can walk somewhere. You sure everything’s okay?”

  I nod, but don’t say much more. I change out of my shorts and into a pair of yoga capris, and Marcel leads the way out of the room.

  We go to the beach, taking our flip flops off and carrying them. We walk in silence for a while, until Marcel sighs and caves. He hates when there’s tension between us.

  “Tell me what’s goin’ on, Gabby.” My eyes shift up to his, and deep in them I see the worry again. “Are you not havin’ a good time? Was the jet ski thing too much? I knew I shouldn’t have booked it without askin’—”

  “No—it’s not that, I promise! I had fun doing that with you!”

  “Then what is it? I can always tell when somethin’s botherin’ you.”

  “Okay. Look.” I stop walking and reach for his hand so he can turn toward me. He’s terribly confused, so I reach into my bra with the other hand, pulling out the wrapped pregnancy test.

  He watches me unravel it, and when I reveal the stick, his eyes grow even wider.

  “I have a period tracker app on my phone, and I checked it today. My period is late by a week and a few days. I ran to the pharmacy, grabbed this, and used it.” I study his face, unable to gauge his reaction. Other than shock and confusion, I don’t know if he’s upset about this or what.

  “I’m pregnant, Marcel.”

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Marcel

  “Pregnant?” The word comes out of me like I’ve been punched right in the gut. How the hell is that even possible? She’s been on birth control for months now, way before she ever even met me. I remember the times she told me she needed to pick up her prescription.

  “How is that possible?” I ask in utter disbelief. “I mean—I know how it happened, but…how? I thought you were protectin’ yourself?”

  She shrugs, her eyes glistening. “I don’t know! I was taking the pill every single day!” She twists her fingers in her lap. “But now that I’ve had time to think about it, there were a few days I was a little late taking it. I got caught up at the art shop one week because things were crazy-busy and kept taking the pills late, but as soon as I realized, though, I took them. It was only a few hours after I was supposed to, so I didn’t think it would be that bad.”

  “Damn.” I plant a hand on my hip, still in shock.

  “Are you mad?”

  “What?” I focus on her gloomy eyes. “No, why would I be mad?”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I’m not mad, Gabby, I promise you. Just shocked, is all.”

  “I’m so sorry—I know it’s too soon for all of this to happen! I didn’t mean for it to, so I get it if you don’t want it—”

  “What?” I face her full on. “Are you kiddin’ me? It’s my baby, Gabby.”

  Her eyes grow wider. “But it’s only been a year and a few months since we’ve met…”

  “And I feel like I know enough about you to know you’d make a great mother, and we’d make great parents.” I grab her hands, holding them tight. “Gabby, this kind of stuff doesn’t happen for no reason. We did this, and we’ll take care of it. I’m not mad. Honestly, I think I’m kind of glad about it. Don’t know what that says about me, but I am.”

  She presses her lips and nods. “Are you sure? I just don’t want to ruin your life. After everything we’ve been through, this will change so much.” Her voice breaks.

  I shake my head with a short laugh. “When will you get it, little thing? Not once have you ruined my life since you walked into it. You have bettered me in so many ways.” Tears line the rims of her eyes. I bend down to kiss her belly. “I’m going to take care of my baby. I’m going to take care of you. The question is, are you ready for that?”

  She chokes on a sob and a laugh. “I don’t know, but as long as you’re with me, I know I’ll be okay.” She cradles my face in her hands. “I love you so much.”

  “I love you too, girl. To death.”

  It’s true. I love Gabby so much more than I ever could have imagined. I have never fallen for a woman like this before, so hard and so fast. She is my world, and to know she’s about to carry my baby changes everything.

  This woman will become my true queen. She will have everything…which leads me to thinking that maybe it’s not too soon for what I was originally planning to do today.

  I dig in my pocket, pulling out the velvety black box that has been burning a hole in there ever since I left to grab some lunch.

  The truth is, I didn’t just go out to grab something to eat. I went because I had to figure out when and how to ask her. I wasn’t sure if I should even ask so soon, but now that she’s told me this, I can’t pass the opportunity up.

  She’s confused at first, but when I bring the box up, she gasps. Soft gusts of wind whip at her hair and twist through mine as I open the box.

  “I was thinkin’ maybe it was too soon to ask you to marry me, but now that I know you’re carryin’ my baby, that means you’ll have to deal with me for at least the next eighteen years of your life. Might as well make ’em count, right?” I smile up at her, and her brimming tears have fallen to her cheeks.

  She pushes a hand through her hair. “Marcel? Are you serious?”

  “As a heart attack.”

  She bubbles out a laugh then drops to her knees with me, cupping my face in her hands. “It’s not too soon! It’s not. This is just right,” she promises, then kisses me wholly. “I can’t believe this! How long have you had this?” she squeals.

  “Well over two months now. Was waiting for the perfect time to ask.” I take the diamond ring out of the box, sliding it onto her ring finger. “Hope you don’t mind. I took one of your rings to the jeweler to make sure I had the right size.”

  “I can’t believe this,” she gasps, studying the ring.

  “I told you from the beginning that I’m not goin’ anywhere, Gabby, and I mean that. You stormed into my life like a hurricane and turned my whole world upside down, but only for the better. You’re smart, beautiful, kind, and everything I never knew I wanted. I promise to devote the rest of my life to you, if you’ll have me for that long.”

  “Yes,” she cries out, smiling hard. “Yes! I’ll have you for that long! I’ll marry you!”

  “Good, ’cause that ring wasn’t cheap, and I’m pretty sure I can’t return it.”

  We both break out in a loud laugh and then we kiss.

  This kiss is powerful.

  It’s a kiss that binds and ignites us, our knees in the sand and our fingers in each other’s hair, not giving a damn about who may be watching.

  I just asked my dream girl to marry me, and she said yes. If anyone feels some type of way about that, then that’s on them, but right now, this is how I show my appreciation.

  I’m celebrating by having her in my arms.

  I love this girl, and I truly do want her for the rest of my life.

  She’ll be carrying my child, and maybe another man wouldn�
��t want it to play out this way, but this news makes me happy as hell.

  I’ve always wanted a family of my own, even more so after losing Shay. Knowing that I’ll get to have that and more with Gabby completes me in ways that I can’t even begin to describe.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Gabby

  Nine months later

  I thought when Marcel asked me to marry him, that it would be the happiest day of my life.

  But no.

  The happiest day of my life is now, as I hold my sweet baby girl in my arms. She’s so beautiful that I cried before the nurse even placed her in my arms.

  After being in labor for twenty-six hours, I thought I wouldn’t make it, but she came out screaming and letting the whole hospital know she was here.

  Tears of joy slip down my cheeks as I study her button nose and bright eyes. They’re green, like mine. Her cheeks are rosy, and she has a head full of beautiful brown hair, like her dad.

  I am filled to the brim with unconditional love.

  “Damn. Would you look at that?” Marcel steps beside me, looking down at her. “She’s gorgeous.” He looks at me, and I smile up at him. He plants a kiss on my lips then drops one on our daughter’s forehead.

  “You wanna hold her?” I ask softly.

  He freezes a moment, studying the baby before looking up at me. He hasn’t held her yet. I know he’s nervous.

  He nods, standing up straight. I offer him to her, and he takes her, cradling her to his chest. His eyes glisten as he stares at her with so much love. Seeing him like this makes my heart do crazy things.

  “Wow.” I know he’s trying not to cry. He’s avoiding my eyes, but when he looks up, I notice the sparkle in them. “I never thought this would happen for me.”

  “What?”

  “Havin’ my own kid,” he says with a light huff.

  I swear, he says some of the most innocent, swoon-worthy things, and doesn’t even realize it.

  “Well, she’s all yours. You’ve started a family now.”