Tricks and Treats

by J. C. Diem

  “There goes our dinner,” one of the lesser bloodsuckers said morosely.

  That struck Crowmon as funny and I heard him snickering from another rooftop nearby. I cast a dark look upwards, but the trickster was safely hidden from my view.

  Chapter Thirty

  “SOMEONE NEEDS TO SEND for the Immortal Triumvirate,” someone in the growing crowd suggested.

  “I’ll do it,” I said. “I need to send a letter to our leaders advising them about the live oak tree,” I said. A letter appeared in front of me and the message became written in magical ink. “Ask them if I have their permission to kill it,” I added. The words formed on the page, then it folded itself in half and an envelope appeared around it. It zoomed off towards the City Square.

  “How did this happen?” an uncursed master asked. I saw Jardine watching from afar, but I gave no sign that I remembered her.

  “A clown brought the tree to life,” I said.

  “It was a jester!” Crowmon shouted, then ducked back out of sight when the vampires all looked up.

  “Clowns don’t have this sort of magic,” someone muttered uneasily.

  “He’s a special clown,” I explained, but I didn’t go into detail.

  Instead of a magical letter arriving to give me my answer, Lord Dallinar teleported himself and his allies to me. The fairy looked at the tree and he couldn’t quite mask his astonishment. I sensed Crowmon leave and figured he didn’t want to be anywhere near the rulers of Nox right now. “Well, you weren’t exaggerating,” the fae lord said. “It is indeed a live oak.”

  “Who did this?” Lord Kreaton demanded.

  “It was a clown, my lord,” I replied, playing dumb as always.

  “Was it a clown, or a jester?” Lord Graham asked. His deep voice came out as a growl and his amber eyes locked onto me.

  “He called himself a jester,” I confirmed.

  “Why did he give the tree sentience?” Lord Kreaton asked.

  “He told me we’d met before and I said I couldn’t remember him,” I said truthfully when I saw a group of holy men and women climb out of a carriage. The vampires gave them a wide berth when they joined us. The holy folk were Night Cursed, but they were still dangerous to the leeches.

  “That doesn’t explain why he did this,” Lord Dallinar said and swept his hand at the oak.

  “He said he would do something memorable so I would remember him and he cast the spell,” I said.

  “Kill it,” Lord Graham said, upper lip lifting in distaste. The sentient tree unsettled him even more than it did his allies.

  “This creature is an abomination,” one of the priests who had just arrived said.

  “It has no soul,” a nun agreed.

  “Nothing without a soul should be allowed to live,” another priest said and received dark glances and angry mutters from the vampires.

  “The oak has killed several beings, which is against our laws,” Lord Dallinar declared. He was more fascinated than unsettled by the tree. I had a feeling he wouldn’t have been able to duplicate the spell that had given it awareness.

  “Destroy it before it kills again,” Lord Kreaton ordered me.

  I was bruised and abraded from being almost squeezed to death, but duty called. “Yes, my lords,” I said obediently, then ducked through the hole in the fence and waded back into the fray.

  Everyone wisely kept their distance from the branches as I ducked, dodged and wove my way closer to the trunk. My shield saved me from being skewered more times than I could count. I used my sword and staff to hack at the limbs that reached for me. It was a good thing I was ambidextrous and I could use my weapons with both hands.

  The oak roared at me when I was within a few yards of its face. Its eyes rolled wildly and it tried to pummel me to death with its branches. It was as mindless as a zombie and I was glad it didn’t have the brains to come up with a strategy. All it could do was reach out and try to grab anything that was close to it.

  Fresh danger came in the form of a chair that was thrown at me by a branch. Other limbs searched the house for projectiles. I had to dodge out of the way of the furniture and other items that came my way. “So much for it being too dumb to come up with a strategy,” I muttered dourly. I hated it when my enemies proved me wrong.

  Lord Dallinar could have cast spells to assist me, but he just stood there and watched with a tiny smile on his inhumanly handsome face. The Triumvirate were enjoying the show just as much as Crowmon was, on the surface at least. Deep down, I could feel them seething that the trickster god had created such a dangerous foe with such little effort.

  A branch slammed into me and I was sent tumbling across the yard. More limbs tried to spear me. I lay on my back, blocking them with my shield and chopping at them with Wrath’s blades. My silver sword wasn’t going to be of much use, so I left it lying on the ground and scrambled to my feet.

  Rocks from the broken fence were hurled at me next and I nimbly avoided them. The oak’s eyes were locked on me as if it sensed its impending demise. The face was about a foot or so higher than my head. It was the only vulnerable place I could attack. I raced forward, ducking beneath a branch that whooshed towards me, then leaping over the next one. I rammed Wrath’s larger blade into the oak’s mouth and green sap splattered all over my face.

  The crowd cheered as I repeatedly hacked at the tree’s mouth. I blinded it with a swipe of Wrath’s blade. Its branches went berserk now that it could no longer see. An uncursed master vampire who was standing a little too close shouted in pain when she was impaled by a branch. It had just missed her heart and she was yanked backwards by her Night Cursed kiss. If she’d been killed, it would have been an automatic death sentence for Crowmon. The jester’s prank had gotten out of control. If he was still watching, I hoped he appreciated just how dangerous his joke had become to his own welfare.

  Branches slammed into me from behind, but I kept up my attack. More sap spewed from the maw of the monster. I was coated in it by now, but the leather strips on Wrath’s handle kept my grip firm. I hacked my way deeper into the oak’s core and its wooden teeth began to gnash at my arm. I jammed my shield into the creature’s orifice to hold it open and stabbed as hard and fast as I could.

  The oak finally let out a weak gurgle, then it became inert as it expired. Wrath had caused catastrophic damage in what passed for the heart of the tree. I knew it was dead when its trunk and branches darkened and its leaves began to fall off. After a couple of minutes, I stood up to my knees in dead black leaves.

  “Is it over?” one of the spectators called out shakily.

  “It’s dead,” I confirmed wearily. Blood and sap soaked my sleeve and dripped down my arm. I was going to need stitches again.

  “Good work, Ms. Evora,” Lord Dallinar said condescendingly. “Once again, the Guardian of Nox has done her duty and has kept us safe from the evil monsters.”

  “This had better not happen again,” Lord Kreaton said in an ominous tone. His black eyes swept the crowd in search of the trickster god they knew was responsible for the prank. “If it does, we will be forced to issue an execution order on the person who made the tree sentient.”

  “If any more foul, soulless creatures like this are created, you have our permission to execute them immediately,” the fairy advised me as I retrieved my sword.

  None of the uncursed citizens had died, but one of them had come perilously close to it. Even if our leaders did order me to kill Crowmon right now, I wouldn’t be able to. His pranks would have to actually kill someone before Wrath could claim his life.

  Somewhere in the distance, I heard the jingle of bells. The jester had heard the threat and I was pretty sure he hadn’t taken it seriously.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  SINCE I HAD AN EXCUSE to visit a hospital, I took a carriage to the far side of the city to where Travis worked. I arrived in a lull between emergencies, so my main squeeze could see me straight away. The sexy nurse who escorted me to an examination room kept givi
ng me curious sidelong looks. I left a trail of blood and green sap in my wake, but magic cleaned it up a few seconds later.

  “What seems to be the problem, young lady?” Travis asked, looking at my chart rather than at me as he entered the room. He was pretending he didn’t know me again.

  “An oak tree tried to eat me, doc,” I replied.

  Travis was grinning when he looked up, mistakenly thinking I was joking. His expression turned grim when he saw I was covered in green sap and blood was dripping from my fingertips. “You didn’t go into the Fairytale Forest, did you?” he asked. Some sections of the forest were dangerous and some of the plants were sentient, or so I’d heard.

  “The jester struck again,” I explained and told him what had happened as he stripped my shirt and jacket off so he could examine me.

  “If the clown keeps this up, our leaders will surely order you to execute him,” Travis said when I was done. I looked away from the teeth marks in my arm and winced in pain as he cleaned my wounds. “You’ll feel a little prick now,” he warned me as he reached for a syringe.

  “I wouldn’t say it’s little,” I said and flicked a sly smirk at his groin. “I’d say it was just the right size.”

  He smirked back at me, then I grimaced when he injected me with local anesthetic to numb the area. He expertly stitched me up, then put dressings over the wounds. “There you go,” he said, but he didn’t produce a lollipop for me.

  “Don’t I deserve a reward for being a good patient, doctor?” I asked, lowering my eyes coyly.

  “You were such a good girl that I’ve got a special reward for you, Ms. Evora,” he said with a lustful grin. He crossed to the door, locked it, then pulled the privacy curtain shut behind him. “Remember the challenge you issued me a while ago?” he asked when he started stripping off.

  I cast my mind back a few weeks and raised one eyebrow in speculation. “You don’t mean...” My words trailed off as he nodded.

  “I do mean,” he replied. He was now buck naked, but I was still wearing my boots, jeans and underwear. With his help, I became as naked as he was.

  “How are we going to do this?” I asked, looking around the room for inspiration.

  “The same way we did it last time,” Travis said. He hopped up onto the bed, then leaned back until his hands were resting on the other edge. “On you get, babe,” he invited me, looking meaningfully down at his crotch. He’d risen to the occasion and he was more than ready for me.

  “It’s lucky we’re in a hospital, because I have a feeling this is going to end badly,” I predicted. The examination bed was so narrow that it was hazardous to attempt what we were about to do. I was just as up to the challenge as my hot doctor boyfriend, so I climbed onto the bed, straddled his legs, then guided him into me.

  Thanks to my injuries, I could only use one arm, so I held onto Travis’ shoulder and set a fast pace. His pupils dilated and sweat gathered on his upper lip. I leaned forward to lick it off and he kissed me. He propped himself up with one hand and used the other one to grip my hip. He urged me to go harder and faster, so I began slamming myself up and down on him until he was gasping for air.

  I could feel my orgasm building, then Travis did exactly what I’d done the last time we’d had sex on an examination bed. He forgot how narrow it was and leaned backwards. If I’d been smaller and had weighed less, we both would have crashed to the floor. Since I was curvy and not exactly petite, I kept him anchored to the bed.

  “Don’t stop!” Travis moaned and wrapped his legs around me. He was tall enough to be able to press his hands against the floor to hold his weight.

  I drove myself up and down on him with relentless determination. My pleasure built up until I couldn’t contain it and I was rocked with an incredible orgasm. Travis cried out and pumped his hips as he followed me into ecstasy. His final thrust was so hard that it made me lose my balance, then we were both sent tumbling to the floor.

  Travis caught me and cushioned my fall to protect my wounded arm. I grinned at him in thanks. “Gee, doc, your face is bright red,” I teased him.

  “I’ve heard that’s what happens when lying upside down while the love of your life rides you,” he replied.

  “Are you okay in there?” a sexy nurse asked, peering in at us through the window. I realized we’d fallen through the privacy curtain, so anyone who looked inside could see us. The nurse smirked, then snickered when I glared at her.

  “We’re fine! Go away!” I hissed. “Nosy sexy nurses,” I muttered beneath my breath, then tried to draw my dignity around my nakedness as we disentangled ourselves and climbed to our feet.

  Travis grinned, then pulled a red lollipop out of thin air. “You’ve earned this, babe,” he said.

  I snatched it out of his hand and stuck it in my mouth. “I always earn it,” I said. My words sounded garbled from speaking around the candy.

  “Make sure you drop in tomorrow night so I can take your stitches out,” he reminded me, not that I needed it. My cuts were already healing and they would soon be driving me mad with itchiness.

  “Will do, doc,” I promised.

  My shirt and jacket were torn and badly stained, but they were still wearable. A pair of uncursed werewolves in their human forms were sitting in the waiting area. They’d chosen so sit as far away as they could get from the Night Cursed beings. They watched me hungrily as I strode past them. They could smell the blood that coated my clothes. Neither of them were injured, so they were probably waiting for someone to finish being treated. The scent of blood excited them, but I kept my cool and ignored them. If I acted like prey, they would chase me down and savage me to death. Few shifters could control their instincts this close to the full moon, which was tomorrow night.

  Crowmon had reached his quota of fun for the night and left me alone as I continued my patrol. Or maybe he’d worn himself out more than he’d let on. Bringing an entire oak tree to sentience had to have taxed his reserves even after using the Night Cursed for a power source.

  If I’d possessed even a shred of trust for the Immortal Triumvirate, I would have informed them about Crowmon’s theft of our power. Since they’d proven to be evil to the core, I decided to withhold the information from them. Thanks to Quilla’s visions, we knew our leaders would one day be challenged. There was a slim possibility that they might be toppled from their metaphorical thrones. My lips quirked upwards in a smile at that prospect. I had no idea who was eventually going to stand up to the rulers of Nox, but I had my fingers crossed that they would succeed.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  THE INCIDENT WITH THE oak tree seemed to have satisfied Crowmon’s desire to torment me. He stopped shadowing me around and things had been fairly quiet. There were the usual fights that needed to be broken up, vampire victims to be rescued and ghostly hauntings to disperse. My nights were busy and there was always something that needed my attention.

  A few more weeks passed and the leaves transformed in color to reflect the changing of seasons. It was easy to lose track of time, but my kind knew that it was Halloween tonight. Halloween was a strange time in Nox. The Night Cursed became unsettled and the undead were restless. We shunned the uncursed who celebrated the event. Unlike the rest of the population, no decorations adorned our homes or our workplaces.

  I now knew why this night held such an oppressive sense of doom for us. Jardine had told me that we’d been created on Halloween ten years ago. Deep down, we all knew we were unnatural and that there was something deeply wrong with us. My friends and I were the only Night Cursed who knew the truth. I couldn’t help but wonder how long we would remember it. As always, the fog in our minds was trying to swallow the knowledge of who and what we were.

  Power throbbed throughout the City of Night. It was so thick that I felt as if I could reach out and grab a handful of it. Carriages were being driven by sullen skeletons. They snarled at the decorations that hung in the windows of the uncursed citizens’ homes and workplaces. Shifter werebeasts who drew s
ome of the carriages were skittish and unwilling to do their jobs. I saw one snap its teeth at an uncursed witch who needed a ride. She leaped back, then shook her fist at the werehorse. The skeleton driver looked down at her, then flicked its whip to make the beast take off. Squawking in outrage, the witch had no choice but to wait for another carriage to turn up. She probably didn’t have enough power to teleport to where she wanted to go.

  A chilly wind hit me as I crossed a bridge on foot into the Vampire District. I ignored the cold and wended my way through the narrow, twisting streets. Someone screamed in pain from inside a modest stone mansion. Everyone in the house was Night Cursed, so I kept on walking. I wasn’t in the mood to interrupt their meal. Hundreds of my kin became snacks for the leeches on a nightly basis. It was just the way it was in Nox.

  My feet carried me to the house that had been half-destroyed by the tree Crowmon had brought to life a few weeks ago. The tree had become a withered black husk. Its face remained and there was a deep hole in the trunk where I’d stabbed it to death. The teeth that had chewed on my arm were broken wooden stumps. Scars marked where its eyes had been.

  While the house had been repaired by magic, the stone fence still had a gap in it. I was pretty sure the Immortal Triumvirate wanted the hole to remain so everyone could see my handiwork. Someone had placed three pumpkins around the base of the oak tree. Scary faces had been carved into them and they bore a startling resemblance to the unholy trinity. Flames from magically lit candles danced inside the hollowed-out vegetables. They cast shadows that almost made the pumpkins seem like they were alive.

  “Spooky, isn’t it?” Crowmon said from right behind me.

  I’d sensed him arrive a moment before he’d spoken, but I started anyway because that was what he would expect me to do. “Who are you?” I asked. As always, he wore his red and green jester outfit.