Discovering Delilah

by Melissa Foster

“Generations.” She laughs and shakes her head. “Bubbles,” she says under her breath.

  “Delilah…What changed?”

  She stops at a stop sign and sets her confident green eyes on me.

  “Everything.”

  ~Delilah~

  I PARK AT the cemetery and step from the Jeep, then walk around to the back and unwrap the package that I bought on my way back to my parents’ house before finding Ashley there. I hadn’t intended to use it until I was back at Harborside, but I’m done waiting.

  “What are you doing?” she asks as she comes around to my side of the Jeep.

  I tuck the item into my back pocket. “Nothing.” I wrap my arm around Ashley’s waist and lead her away from the Jeep. She tries to peek at my back, but I lean backward and block her view.

  “Stop looking, Little Miss Need to Know.”

  She laughs.

  I love her laugh.

  I want her to laugh again just so I can hear it and watch her eyes light up.

  Until now I was dipping my toe into the water of our relationship. Now I’ve finally taken the plunge. And it feels so good I think I might burst.

  “Did someone give you magic coming out pills? Because that was one hell of a toe-curling kiss you gave me in front of your house,” Ashley says as we cross the grass toward my parents’ graves.

  I pull her closer. “I couldn’t help myself. I hope I didn’t embarrass you.”

  That earned me the laugh I crave.

  “The last few months have been really hard, but not nearly as hard as the last twenty-four hours. I think I went through every stage of grief at once.”

  She leans her head on my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Dee. I’ll never keep a secret from you again. I went to see Sandy, and it was a disaster.”

  My stomach twists. “You saw her?”

  Ashley nods. “Brandon went with me.”

  “Brandon?”

  “Don’t ask. I wanted to tell her off, and I did, but as I was yelling at her, I realized that it was me who had hurt you, not her. I’m the one who didn’t share her texts with you. I didn’t want you to worry.”

  We stop walking in front of my parents’ graves, and she continues her confession.

  “If I’m being completely honest, I was probably also keeping them to remind myself that I didn’t want to be anyone’s dirty little secret again.”

  “Oh.” No, no, no. Please don’t tell me you don’t want us anymore. I drop my eyes, and she steps in closer, lifts my chin.

  “Delilah, I’m not going anywhere. I may have been keeping the texts as reminders, but all they did was piss me off. I admit that I don’t like holding back my feelings for you in public, because I feel more for you than anything I’ve ever felt for anyone in my entire life. You can rest assured that I will never leave you because of that. You’ve become my best friend, the person I want to share my life and my bed with. I want to be the one you call when you’re happy or sad, the person you trust to love you no matter what. I want to wake up and see your sleepy face, and I want to sit on the dunes with you while you teach me to sketch and I mess up because I’m too busy staring at you. No pressure. No ultimatums. When you’re ready to own our relationship, I’ll be right here by your side, waiting for you.”

  “Ash…” I blink several times to keep from crying. I’ve cried enough for a lifetime. “I’m ready.” I face my parents’ graves. “Mom, Dad, this is Ashley Carver, my girlfriend.”

  Ashley squeezes my hand.

  “I love her. I love the person she is and the person she wants to be. I love the way she makes me feel, and when I’m with her, I’m proud of who I am.”

  I wipe a tear from Ashley’s cheek with my thumb, then place my hands on her cheeks and gaze into her eyes. I want her to feel my love for her, to know it’s real and true and that I’m done pretending I’m not her girlfriend.

  “I love you, Ashley, and I hope this is loud enough for you to hear me.”

  I take the microphone from my back pocket, turn it on. She and I both smile as I speak into it.

  “I love you, Ashley.” It doesn’t amplify my voice. Ashley’s eyes are wide, and her jaw is hanging open. Her fingers slip into my front pocket and hold on tight. I turn the microphone over in my hands.

  “Um, Dee?”

  “Wait. Let me try again.” I turn it off, then on again. “I love you, Ashley!” Even when I yell, it doesn’t amplify my voice.

  She leans in close and whispers, “I think you need a speaker.”

  We both burst into laughter.

  “I heard you loud and clear, you big dork!”

  “Ha! You have a dorky girlfriend. What does that say about you?”

  “That I’m the luckiest girl around.”

  When her lips touch mine, I want to argue that she’s wrong, that I’m the luckiest girl around. But I don’t break our connection—and I have a feeling nothing ever will.

  Epilogue

  ~Delilah~

  I NEVER THOUGHT that anything good could come from losing someone I loved, and don’t get me wrong, I’d do anything to have my parents back in my life, even with all the guilt they left me with. But that’s not going to happen. I’ll never be able to take back my thoughts of wishing my parents didn’t exist, and I can never relive the years I kept my desires a secret. I can’t go backward. None of us can. But sitting on the beach watching a roaring bonfire with Ashley cuddled up beside me, surrounded by our best friends, I know I have them to thank for how far I’ve come.

  I don’t wish I could have a do-over.

  I just want to do things right as we move forward.

  Cassidy’s singing a Matchbox Twenty song while Brandon plays the guitar, and Wyatt’s sitting beside her, looking at her like he loves her more than life itself. And I know he does.

  “So, you’re really moving out?” Tristan sips a beer and hands the bottle to Charley. They’re sharing a blanket across from us.

  “Yup. And you get to help me move.” After I got back from Connecticut, I stopped by Ashley’s apartment complex and turned in my rental application. They called this morning with the good news. I am now the proud renter of a one-bedroom apartment.

  I feel Wyatt’s glare. He’s still not sold on the idea of me living alone, but he’s trying to give me the space I need.

  “Wyatt, she’ll be okay.” Brooke reaches over and pats his leg. “How did you ever make it when she lived in the girls’ dorm the first year of college?”

  Wyatt rolls his eyes. “I think I was worse than my parents. I went by every day to make sure she was okay.”

  “When Jesse and I went away to school, I think my mom celebrated.” Brent laughs.

  Jesse pokes the fire with a stick. “She might have celebrated you leaving, but she missed me.”

  Brent gives him a playful shove.

  “We have some rules to work out. Nightly check-ins, things like that.” Wyatt’s lips quirk up, and I know he’s teasing.

  “Yeah, like Brandon gets a key in case he needs a place to stay.” Brandon holds out a hand and Wyatt high-fives him.

  Ashley wraps her arms around my waist. “I’ll make sure she’s safe, Wyatt.”

  Wyatt gives me a look of approval. I never realized how heavily the way I hid my feelings weighed on him. I smile to let him know I understand, and I place my hand on Ashley’s—because I want to.

  “Are we ready?” Wyatt stands and pulls Cassidy up beside him. She grabs her camera.

  “Yeah, as ready as we’re going to get.” Ashley and I stand, and everyone else follows suit.

  We all walk toward the deck. Wyatt drapes an arm over my shoulder.

  “You okay?”

  “I’m better than I ever thought I would be.” I reach for Ashley’s hand. “Much better.”

  “You know that even when you live at that apartment complex, you can call me anytime, right? I’ll drop what I’m doing and come over.” Wyatt’s voice is so serious it’s a little startling.

  “Wyatt, you know
I’ll be fine, don’t you?”

  He nods. “It’s a twin thing.” He leans in close and whispers, “I’ll miss you.”

  I smile and hug him close. “I’ll miss you, too.”

  Wyatt reaches for Cassidy’s hand as we walk up the stairs onto the deck, where Jesse and Brent have already begun untying the balloons from their tethers. They give each of us a handful of ribbons as the yellow balloons bob above us. Wyatt and I were going to have a goodbye ceremony for our parents, but we decided instead to have a ceremony to celebrate the start our new lives.

  “Army, you care if I go first? I kinda want to get the sappy stuff over with.” Brandon looks up at the balloon and shakes his head.

  “No, man. Go for it,” Wyatt answers.

  Cassidy lifts her camera to her eye and snaps pictures as Brandon prepares to speak.

  Brandon holds the ribbons up over his head. “Here’s to new digs, new loves—for you guys, not for me—and to a whole hell of a lot of partying.” He releases his balloons and they float up toward the clouds.

  “They’re so pretty,” Charley says. “Brooke and I want to release ours together. Is that okay?”

  “Absolutely.” They hold their balloons up and both close their eyes.

  “To a year full of hot guys and great grades for me,” Charley says, then looks at Brooke, who adds, “And a successful party-planning business.”

  We all cheer as Cassidy snaps picture after picture.

  Wyatt nods to Jesse.

  “To the success of the Taproom and our new restaurant, which is still nameless.” Jesse releases his balloons and nods at Brent.

  “To massive waves and safe rides.” Brent watches his balloons rise.

  “Tristan? You want to go next?” Wyatt asks.

  “Sure, Army.” Tristan holds up the balloons, and his eyes roll over each of us.

  “To good friends and good times.”

  “Loser,” Brandon teases.

  Tristan elbows him, and they fake punch each other in the gut and laugh, while Cassidy captures it all on film.

  “Wy?” I offer for him to go next.

  He takes Cassidy’s hand. She hands the camera to Charley. “Do you mind?”

  “Not at all.” Charley gets the camera ready. “Okay.”

  They hold the balloons between them and gaze into each other’s eyes, and as I watch them make their wish, I realize I’m not pining for someone I can no longer have. I am finally capable of giving Ashley the love she deserves, no matter where we are. It won’t always come easily, and I know I’ll still get nervous sometimes, but I also know she’ll be right here by my side.

  We both look up at the balloons. We haven’t discussed what we want to say when we release them. We both thought we’d know when the time was right.

  I know.

  “To moving forward.”

  I don’t see the balloon rising toward the stars, and I don’t see the look of happiness that I know is on our friends’ faces. But I feel it all as I kick that fictional closet door open and take a giant leap out, gather Ashley in my arms, and press my lips to hers.

  —The End—

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  Love in Bloom novel

  Game of Love (The Remingtons, Book One)

  Game of Love Excerpt - Chapter One

  DEX REMINGTON WALKED into NightCaps bar beside his older brother Sage, an artist who also lived in New York City, and Regina Smith, his employee and right arm. Women turned in their direction as they came through the door, their hungry eyes raking over Dex’s and Sage’s wide shoulders and muscular physiques. At six foot four, Sage had two inches on Dex, and with their striking features, dark hair, and federal-blue eyes, heads spun everywhere they went. But after Dex had worked thirty of the last forty-eight hours, women were the furthest thing from his mind. His four-star-general father had ingrained hard work and dedication into his head since he was old enough to walk, and no matter how much he rued his father’s harsh parenting, following his lead had paid off. At twenty-six, Dex was one of the country’s leading PC game designers and the founder of Thrive Entertainment, a multimillion-dollar gaming corporation. His father had taught him another valuable lesson—how to become numb—making it easy for him to disconnect from the women other men might find too alluring to ignore.

  Dex was a stellar student. He’d been numb for a very long time.

  “Thanks for squeezing in a quick beer with me,” he said to Sage. They had about twenty minutes to catch up before his scheduled meeting with Regina and Mitch Anziano, another of his Thrive employees. They were going to discuss the game they were rolling out in three weeks, World of Thieves II.

  “You’re kidding, right? I should be saying that to you.” Sage threw his arm around Dex’s shoulder. They had an ongoing rivalry about who was the busiest, and with Sage’s travel and gallery schedule and Dex working all night and getting up midday, it was tough to pick a winner.

  “Thrive!” Mitch hollered from the bar in his usual greeting. Mitch used Thrive! to greet Dex in bars the way others used, Hey. He lifted his glass, and a smile spread across his unshaven cheeks. At just over five foot eight with three-days’ beard growth trailing down his neck like fur and a gut that he was all too proud of, he was what the world probably thought all game designers looked like. And worth his weight in gold. Mitch could outprogram anyone, and he was more loyal than a golden retriever.

  Regina lifted her chin and elbowed Dex. “He’s early.” She slinked through the crowded bar, pulling Dex along behind her. Her Levi’s hung low, cinched across her protruding hip bones by a studded black leather belt. Her red hoodie slipped off one shoulder, exposing the colorful tattoos that ran across her shoulder and down her arms.

  Mitch and Regina had been Dex’s first employees when he’d opened his company. Regina handled the administrative aspects of the company, kept the production schedule, monitored the program testing, and basically made sure nothing slipped through the cracks, while Mitch, like Dex, conceptually and technically designed games with the help of the rest of Thrive’s fifty employees—developers, testers, and a host of programmers and marketing specialists.

  Regina climbed onto the barstool beside Mitch and lifted his beer to her lips.

  “Order ours yet?” she asked with a glint in her heavily lined dark eyes. She ran her hand through her stick-straight, jet-black hair.

  Dex climbed onto the stool beside her as the bartender slid beers in front of him and Regina. “Thanks, Jon. Got a brew for my brother?”

  “Whatever’s on tap,” Sage said. “Hey, Mitch. Good to see you.”

  Mitch lifted his beer with a nod of acknowledgment.

  Dex took a swig of the cold ale, closed his eyes, and sighed, savoring the taste.

  “Easy, big boy. We need you sober if you wanna win a GOTY.” Mitch took a sip of Regina’s beer. “Fair’s fair.”

  Regina rolled her eyes and reached a willowy arm behind him, then mussed his mop of curly dark hair. “We’re gonna win Game of the Year no matter what. Reviewers love us. Right, Dex?”

  Thrive had already produced three games, one of which, World of Thieves, had made Dex a major player in the gaming world—and earned him millions of dollars. His biggest competitor, KI Industries, had changed the release date for their new game. KI would announce the new date publicly at midnight, and since their game was supposed to be just as hot of a game as they expected World of Thieves II to be, if they released close to the release for World of Thieves II, there would be a clear winner and a clear loser. Dex had worked too hard to be the loser.

  “That’s the hope,” Dex said. He took another swig of his beer and checked his watch. Eight forty-five and his body thought it was noon. He’d spent so many years working all night an
d sleeping late that his body clock was completely thrown off. He was ready for a big meal and the start of his workday. He stroked the stubble along his chin. “I worked on it till four this morning. I think I deserve a cold one.”

  Sage leaned in to him. “You’re not nervous about the release, are you?”

  Of his five siblings—including Dex’s twin sister, Siena, Sage knew him best. He was the quintessential artist, with a heart that outweighed the millions of dollars his sculptures had earned him. He’d supported Dex through the years when Dex needed to bend an ear, and when he wasn’t physically nearby, Sage was never farther than a text or a phone call away.

  “Nah. If it all fails, I’ll come live with you.” Dex had earned enough money off of the games he’d produced that he’d never have to worry about finances again, but he wasn’t in the gaming business for the money. He’d been a gamer at heart since he was able to string coherent thoughts together, or at least it felt that way. “What’s happening with the break you said you wanted to take? Are you going to Jack’s cabin?” Their eldest brother Jack owned a cabin in the Colorado Mountains. Jack was an ex–Special Forces officer and a survival-training guide, and he and his fiancée Savannah spent most weekends at the cabin. Living and working in the concrete jungle didn’t offer the type of escape Sage’s brain had always needed.

  “I’ve got another show or two on the horizon; then I’ll take time off. But I think I want to do something useful with my time off. Find a way to, I don’t know, help others instead of sitting around on my ass.” He sipped his beer and tugged at the neck of his Baja hippie jacket. “How ’bout you? Any plans for vacay after the release?”

  “Shit. You’re kidding, right? My downtime is spent playing at my work. I love it. I’d go crazy sitting in some cabin with no connectivity to the real world.”

  “The right woman might change your mind.” Sage took a swig of his beer.

  “Dex date?” Regina tipped her glass to her lips. “Do you even know your brother? He might hook up once in a while, but this man protects his heart like it carries all of the industry secrets.”