The Cardboard Spaceship (To Brave The Crumbling Sky Book 1)

by Matt Snee

  They may have looked like ghosts, but the wolves' teeth were sharp and their mouths were hot. Captain gasped as he could feel them biting into his shoulder, the box ripping out from under him and Jennifer's hand torn from his own. He could hear her scream, and a shock of terror lifted in his heart. He screamed himself. They bit his hands, attacked his face, destroying the box that had held them so carefully, grabbing his legs in their jaws and ripping, tearing, and chewing on him.

  So this is it, he thought to himself, in one last clear moment. All that … for what? For this? What did it matter? What did it matter at all?

  The world went dark, but he could still feel the pain as they bit into him. Now one of them had him by the neck, and he could feel hot blood streaming down his chest as they floated through space, overcome by these foul dogs. He couldn't hear Jennifer scream anymore and wondered, simply: Is she dead? Am I alone?

  And then …

  Nothing.

  * * *

  “Captain?”

  He opened his eyes. Bright sunlight plunged into his head, and he looked up to see the shadow of his dad standing over him, framed by a bright blue sky.

  “You okay?” his dad asked.

  “Dad?” Captain was on his back, lying in a baseball field, surrounded by kids, coaches, and parents. He lifted himself up to a sitting position and the world spun as he moved, the edges of his sight clenching up like burning twigs. “What happened to me?”

  “You got hit by the ball, kid,” someone said.

  “Shhh,” his dad interrupted. “Captain, you missed the ball. Well, you caught it with your face. Don't you remember?”

  Captain did his best to reconstruct such an event in his memory. After a moment, he shook his head. “No …I was …there were wolves. And there was …a girl.”

  The boys laughed. Captain could feel himself turning red.

  “C'mon,” his dad said, extending his arm and pulling him up. “Let's get you some water.”

  “Okay,” said Captain. The crowd dispersed, worry dissipating. The others laughed and chatted as they went back to the stands or their places on the field, and Captain, unsure on his feet, just followed his dad.

  “You okay?” Lewis Senior asked him.

  “Yeah,” he said, though he didn't know if he was. What had happened?

  He focused his eyes on the world around him. Something was wrong. The city that surrounded them was too red, the buildings had a crazed crimson glare to them, and when he looked up to the sky, he saw a great yellow wing fluttering behind the clouds instead of the sun. His head ached and his neck felt raw, like something had eaten it.

  “We have to get you out of here,” said Captain's dad.

  “Why?”

  “Because the Shadows are coming. Their power extends to this world.”

  “I don't understand, Dad. Where's Mom? Is she okay?”

  “You'll see her soon, kid, but we're in a hurry. We got to get you safe.”

  “But …I…”Captain stumbled, and then regained his footing. His dad took his arm and guided him across the grass. “But what about…” he searched his brain for her name until it flashed like lightning“…Jennifer?”

  Lewis Senior laughed. “Oh, her? I wouldn't worry about her. She's got her own little helper.”

  The ground rumbled beneath them. They stopped then started again, faster this time. “Come on,” Captain's dad said.

  They rushed, feet unsure across the ground. Captain could hear a distant trumpet behind him, and he turned, seeing at the edge of the baseball field a line of white-winged figures of various color, though they were all tall and magnificent. There were thirteen of them. “But, Dad!” Captain said. “Those are angels!”

  “Yup,” said his dad. “That's why we're hurrying.”

  “But can't you talk to them? Won't they listen to you?”

  “They don't listen,” his dad instructed. “They just command.”

  “I remember wolves,” Captain said to himself, feeling drowsy.

  “That's good. Just keep on focusing on that, and we won't lose you to the heavens yet.”

  “But where are we going?”

  “Just over here, see?” his dad pointed. “To the other side of that fence. Then you'll be safe.”

  Captain turned and looked back at the angels, who slowly floated toward them. “But…”

  “No buts, mister.” His dad continued to pull him away. “Now, through the gate,” he said as they reached the fence.

  “Okay,” said Captain. They opened the gate and passed through. Once on the other side, Captain turned again but saw only black night behind him. The sight made him dizzy, and he fell to the ground.

  “It's alright, it's alright,” his dad told him, catching him softly and lowering him to the grass. “We made it. You're safe.”

  Captain felt an immense relief as he fell onto his back. He sighed. “That was hard.”

  “I know,” his dad said. “But you made it. It's only going to get harder now though.”

  “Is it?”

  “Yes.”

  “You're dead though, aren't you dad?”

  His dad laughed. “That I am, Captain.”

  “I let mom die.”

  “No, you didn't. No, you didn't, Son. She protected you. That's what mothers do.”

  “It's not fair, any of this.” Captain started to weep.

  “I know.”

  “Can you do me a favor, Dad?”

  “Anything, Son.”

  “Can you tell Mom I love her?”

  “Ha,” said his dad. “You can tell her that yourself.”

  6. The Cosmic Garden

  The Cosmic Garden is not a where; it is a when.

  Martin Pichon, “Le Système Solaire Caché”

  Captain then awoke, lying on his side amidst tall, cool grass in a resplendent night that was both calm and enveloping. He quickly sat up and found himself in a crystalline forest of translucent trees that jingled as the wind blew, beneath a starry sky fractured with nebulae and vertiginous light.

  “Captain?”

  He turned and found Jennifer sitting next to him, her hair pulled back, legs crossed with a book in her lap. Under the starlight, her skin resembled sandalwood and her blue eyes assumed a gray sparkle.

  “Are you okay?” she asked.

  “Yeah,” he said, not knowing if that was the truth. “Where am I?”

  “We're in the Cosmic Garden. The path of the dead.”

  Captain stroked his face and took in the strange surroundings again. “Does that mean …we died?”

  “Yes, and no. We've been temporarily stripped of our mortality, but we're not dead. Our bodies are back on the Moon, almost dead, but we remain in this dimension.”

  “How?”

  “The wolves. Les loup brulants, like my father wrote.” She lifted up the book she was holding, demonstrating that it was what she spoke of. “It was the only way.”

  “You led us to be attacked?”

  “I had to. It was the only way past the wolves. On the Moon our souls are hidden, and the wolves will soon leave, letting us escape.”

  “But we're dead?”

  “Yes, but I know a way out.”

  “I've never known pain like that,” Captain told her.

  “It was a test,” she responded.

  “By whom?”

  “By the gods. Look, I'm sorry. As I said, it was the only way. We had to trick the wolves into thinking we are dead.”

  “How could you do that to me?”

  “I didn't have any choice!”

  “There's always a choice,” Captain told her. “Always.”

  “It was the only way,” she repeated.

  “You should have at least told me.”

  “I know, I'm sorry.”

  Captain thought about the wolves, trying his best to conceal his anger. “Won't they eat us?”

  “They are not alive. They do not eat.”

  Captain nodded. Now he could hear something in the
background, on the horizon, like a damp symphony muffled by distance and time. “What's that music?”

  “I don't know what that is,” Jennifer said. “This is a strange place.”

  Captain was silent. He looked around him at the tall, glass-like trees and the purple grass that stood around them. The light was dim compared to day, but it was bright compared to an Earth night. The stars above were spectacular, and you could almost see them burning. They were closer than the stars on Earth, more vibrant with more complex color and an astonishing flicker.

  To his surprise, he noticed suddenly that they were not alone. Hidden amongst the trees were small, ebony-skinned children with long arms and bald heads. They sat and stood, watching Captain and Jennifer silently. Wide peacock wings sprung from their backs, trembling as they breathed, and their eyes glowed a fiery turquoise.

  Captain almost jumped. “Who are they?”

  “Demons,” she answered.

  It seemed so. They were sublime but frightening things, and as he took a closer look, he saw they were smiling—through fangs.

  “Come on,” Jennifer said. “We should go.”

  * * *

  They got to their feet and she led the way through the trees. There was a subtle path.

  “It's this way,” she said.

  “Have you been here before?”

  “Yes.”

  “Does that mean you have been dead before?”

  She bit her lip but said nothing. He didn't need to know about that.

  “So then, what is this place exactly?”

  She smiled, glad to have something else to talk about. “Like I said, it's the path of the dead. It's a higher dimension than the real world, closer to the heavens.”

  “It's beautiful,” Captain told her. “But I don't understand how it works. Where is this place? How did we get here?”

  “There is no here,” she told him, remembering the words someone had once told her.

  “But surely we're some place.”

  “Yes, we are,” she said. “But that place is no place.”

  * * *

  They made their way through the forest. Captain was impressed by the beauty, but at the same time worried. If they were dead, then—

  “How do we get out of here?”

  “It's okay,” Jennifer said. “I know a way. We have business first.”

  Captain shrugged. There were too many questions in his head. He shut down, and just walked. Every so often they would pass by groups of the children, which more often than not would simply be staring into space.

  “What are they doing?” Captain asked.

  “They are dreaming. That's what they do.”

  They were fascinating creatures. Still, something about them made Captain feel wary. “They really are demons, aren't they?”

  “Yes. Do not get too close. They will bite.”

  Captain and Jennifer continued for few minutes until they came to a clearing in the woods. A great meadow revealed itself, and in its center stood a tall elk that was silver in the starlight.

  “Wait.” Jennifer touched his arm.

  “What is that?” he whispered.

  “It is not what it appears to be.”

  They stared at the beast. There was something decidedly otherworldly about it. A kind of awe rippled through their limbs as the elk, as simple as it was, felt vast.

  “There are many beings that wander this garden,” Jennifer told him. “Disguised as many things. We should avoid this manifestation.”

  They circled around the clearing and walked for some time without saying anything. The forest seemed without end.

  The whole thing reminded Captain of his book, Operation: Mirror, which was about a time-traveling member of the French Resistance: Elise, hell-bent on revenge for her father's death during the Nazi Occupation, which she ultimately realizes is inevitable and unavoidable. In a myriad of ways, in multiple timelines, she attempts to rescue her father from his death. No matter what she does, she cannot save him; if he does not die one way, he dies another. She is helpless beneath the weight of time. In between time periods, Elise finds herself lodged in a strange eternity, outside of the universe, where all the physical laws she takes for granted melt around her. This seemed like such a place.

  And Jennifer suddenly reminded him of Elise's unlikely ally, the Nazi sympathizer Jean Jamie, who both helps and hinders the heroine. He hoped that this similarity proved true, as Jean Jamie, as morally diluted as he is, ultimately does the right thing.

  Could he trust Jennifer to do the same? What were her true motivations? Where was she leading him? What was next?

  They stepped through the crystalline woods carefully, a new blue light climbing from the horizon into the sky. Captain watched as it came into focus—at first like a dim, blue sun, and then finally as itself: Earth. Rising like the Moon, the planet slowly inched across the sky as they made their way through the woods. It was distant, but Captain could still make out the continents. They weren't so far from home after all.

  “Do you know where we're going?” he asked Jennifer.

  “Sort of,” she said. Things had been tense between them since the wolves.

  “No more lies, okay?”

  She stopped and turned to him. “Look, I did what I did because I had to. You're going to have to understand that.”

  “You didn't have to lie,” he said.

  “Maybe not. But I don't know you any better than you know me.”

  “But you said you read my books?”

  “I did say that, and it's true. But I don't know you as a person. Right now, you're just a variable to me.”

  “You can't make decisions for the both of us,” he argued.

  “I know that, but sometimes I have to. You don't know what we're up against. You don't know what it's like out here.”

  “Then tell me! Don't treat me like a child.”

  “I'm sorry,” she said. “I …it's not easy for me to apologize. You should appreciate that.”

  Captain thought about it. “Okay…” he said.

  “I'm under a lot of stress,” she continued. “I don't know you, I don't know what you'll do, and I don't know what you'll think. You might as well be my enemy. I don't know! I'm by myself here.”

  “You're not by yourself. I'm here with you.”

  “I know. You don't understand.”

  “Then make me understand. I still don't get why you need me at all. I should be back on Earth, and my mother should still be alive. If it wasn't for you…”

  “Yes, say it. If it wasn't for me, everything would be back to how it was, wouldn't it? It's all my fault!”

  “I didn't say that,” Captain muttered. “But you have to understand how I feel. I'm lost out here. All I have is…” He trailed off. All he had was Jennifer, but he didn't like admitting it.

  She sighed. “I am truly sorry. I don't want to argue. We're stuck in this together, and that's the way it is. I wish I could help you more, but I can't. Don't blame me. Blame God.”

  Captain doubted God was so testy. “I don't blame you,” he told her. “I don't want us to be enemies. But you have to trust me. I'm forced to trust you. What else can I do? But you have to understand that you're forced to trust me too.”

  She was silent as she considered his words. “Okay,” she said, finally.

  And she started walking again.

  Well, thought Captain, is that really resolved?

  * * *

  Once Earth was high in the sky, a kind of frosty light came down and made it easier to see where they were going. They came to another clearing. As they parted the woods they saw that there were people down in the valley below them—not demons, but actual people.

  “Who are they?” asked Captain.

  “I don't know,” said Jennifer. “Maybe they're like us.”

  “Should we talk to them?”

  “I don't see the point.”

  He peered down at them. One of them looked like …his mother!

 
; “Who?” he breathed.

  “What?” Jennifer asked.

  “Mom,” he said, and he ran down the hill.

  There were perhaps a dozen people walking among the shadows of the valley, milling around, some confused, some chatting happily. As he came down, the woman he recognized turned and looked him in the eyes. It was her!

  Athra Darby.

  “Mom!” Captain exclaimed.

  “Captain!” she cried out, tears pouring from her eyes. “My son!”

  They embraced. “I thought you were dead, Mom.” He hugged her with all his might, inhaling the scent of her, which reminded him of cookies and Sunday afternoons.

  She didn't reply for a moment, enjoying the hug. Then she spoke, loosening her arms around him. “I am dead, Lewis. You know that. This is… the after. Don't you know?”

  “Yeah, but you're right here!”

  “There is no here,” Jennifer said from behind him. She had followed him down the hill.

  Athra shook her head and lifted up her hand, telling Jennifer not to speak. “I've been waiting for you here, before I move on,” she told her son. “They told me you would be coming, and I wanted to say a proper goodbye.”

  Captain said nothing. He could not speak.

  “I love you, I really do,” said his mom.

  “I'm going to go over there, so you two have some privacy,” Jennifer told them, walking away, her head down.

  “I love you too, Mom.” A tear fell from his eye.

  “But you understand we can't stay together? That I have to move on?”

  “Why?”

  “Because we both have places we need to go to now. You will follow Jennifer. She will lead you true.”

  “I know that,” Captain said, though he wasn't sure he did.

  “There are important things for you to do,” his mom continued. “There are important things for all of us to do, and we mustn't dally.”

  “Mom, you could come with us. I could use your help.”

  “No, I have my own business to attend to. Your father… he waits for me now. I have to go to him.”

  “My dad?” Captain mumbled.

  “You have to forgive him,” Athra said. “You can't hate your father for the rest of your life. You'll see.”