Within the Walls of Kingsbury Prep

by Grace Davies

  “Millie, breathe. I’d do that for you because I’m your friend. None of this acquaintance bullshit, we’re friends. Also, for the record I didn’t hate you a few weeks ago, I just thought you were annoying.” I shove him. “That was until I realised how similar we are. Yes, we may have different financial status’ but neither of us have had it easy. I could never hate you. I checked on Lola because I knew it would be hard for her, having her father called out but also because I knew she’d be worried about you. I wanted to let her know I’d be there for you. The shock on her face was very evident. I shouted at Preston because I disagreed with everything he said and even if I did, he had no right to hit you like that. Regarding my father, I’ll pay for that later.’ He goes quiet again.

  ‘Roman what aren’t you telling me? That’s twice now you’ve made a comment like that. You can trust me, I’m your friend.” I place my hand on his, giving it a small squeeze letting him know I’m there for him.

  He keeps his head down but moves away from me slightly and begins to unbuttoning his waistcoat and then shirt.

  “Ro what are you doing?” He shakes his head at me so I stay quiet. Turning away so his back his facing me, he removes his waistcoat, his shirt following. As the white shirt is moved, I let out an involuntary gasp.

  His broad back is completely covered with various bruises and burn marks. His beautiful dolce skin is split open in multiple areas across his back, presumably the result of a belt. I finally understand why he didn’t react when I hit him. He’s been dealing with it for so long, years I’m guessing from how faded some of these scars are. My heart breaks as I run my fingers lightly across his rough damaged skin.

  “Roman, I’m so sorry. I’ve been so horrible to you, thinking you had this perfect life. No wonder you never reacted when I hit you. Oh my God, I hit you. I’m like him. I’m a monster.” I start to hyperventilate, losing my vision through the abundance of tears pooling my eyes.

  “Millie, you’re nothing like him. Please breathe. I didn’t show you my scars to make you upset or to make you feel guilty. I showed them to you because I knew I could trust you and because I wanted to show you how I do understand your pain. It’s a different experience but we still know the same kind of pain. The pain of not feeling good enough, of feeling like you don’t fit in. You’re an ‘outsider’ here due to your financial status, I’m an outsider due to the colour of my skin. I’m an outsider in my own home.”

  “Why does he do it?” I manage to get out in between sobs.

  “Because he’s a dick. Because he hates the fact I’m not like him, the fact I’m not white.”

  “But he married your Mum?”

  “Yeah, out of fear. She worked in his childhood home as a cleaner, one of the many and he liked to have ‘fun’ with his staff you see. He would manipulate them into sleeping with him and if they said no, he’d get them fired. Bearing in mind they were much younger than him. He’d do this with girls who weren’t yet sixteen when he was twenty. My mum was surprisingly the only one who he got pregnant. She was fifteen. There was a huge uproar when my grandparents found out and told him he must marry her or they would cut him off from the family fortune. They had to wait until her sixteenth birthday before they could make the journey up to Scotland where they got married. I was born two months later.”

  “Roman, I didn’t know. I’m so sorry that your mother had to go through that.” I move closer to him.

  “There were lots of complications with the birth as she was so young. She lost a lot of blood in the hospital, she nearly died. Me too. In end the doctors had to operate giving her a full hysterectomy. I know my mother would have loved more children but she’ll never get that. All because my Father wanted a quick shag.” I hear the venom in his voice as he talks about his father.

  “The abuse first happened when I was five when I accidentally spilt orange juice on his laptop. I didn’t even break; it was a tiny spill but that didn’t stop him. He took off his belt and whipped me on the back three times before threatening me not to tell my mother. It didn’t happen again until I was ten when I saw him hurting my mum and tried to help her. Ever since then it’s been random but often. I can never be comfortable in my own home as I never know when it’s coming. It could be a night when I’m sleeping. Could be first thing in a morning. He gets angry a lot but only hurts me occasionally: the rest he saves for my mum. That’s why I’m always in black long-sleeved shirts or if I wear a white shirt, I wear a waistcoat like I have today. I don’t want anyone seeing my scars. Seeing how broken I am.”

  “You suffer immensely at the hand of someone who is supposed to love you unconditionally and protect you from harm but that doesn’t mean you’re broken. You don’t need to be ashamed of your scars Roman, we all have them. It just happens that yours are physical while others are internal or mental. You’re not alone in this. You might not feel comfortable talking to your friends yet or even your mother about what’s going on but you always have me. I’m always here for you if you want to talk about things or you just need an escape. We can just text each other whenever things are getting too much and we’ll meet right here, under our tree.”

  Roman attempts to bite back his tears but a rogue tear betrays him running down his cheek. “You’re one in a million Millicent Anders.”

  I wrap my arm around him and cradle him against me. We just sit there enjoying each other’s company in a comfortable silence. In that moment everything changes, we’re no longer ‘enemies’, nor are we ‘acquaintance’s’. We are friends.

  Chapter Fifteen

  The humanity of foundry

  “Millie, where have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” Lola runs over to me as I walk into the dorm.

  “I just needed to clear my head. I’m so sorry Lola for going off at your Dad like that it was uncalled for. I totally understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore.” I walk past her and sit on my bed.

  “Shut up, you melon, course I still want to be your friend. And what you said to my dad wasn’t uncalled for, you were so right. I can’t believe he hit you, I am so sorry Millie. After everyone left, I had a go at him to and I told him that you are my best friend and you will continue to be until I say so. I will never stop being friends with you just because my dad says so. He’s an entitled dick and he doesn’t control me; he likes to think he does but he doesn’t. Are you okay?”

  I wrap my arms tightly around her petite body. “I love you so much Lola, you’re the best.”

  “Oh, I know,” she laughs. “Seriously though are you okay? Roman said he was going to check on you. How weird is that?”

  A give her fake confused look. “What happened with Roman?”

  “After you ran off, your mum screamed at my dad then ran into the bathroom. Mr Kingsbury came over with his wife and Roman shortly after and began congratulating dad on how he spoke to you and started making sexist comments about emotional women. I blocked most of it out because my blood was boiling but I could see Roman looking out the window at this big tree with worry. My father and Kingsbury started slagging you off and Roman lost it. He told my father how disrespectful he was to not only talk to you that way but to hit you the way he did. That didn’t go down well with Mr Kingsbury because then he started to shout at Roman but Roman just stormed away. He stopped by me before leaving, asking if I was okay and told me he would find you. Then he just left. I was just stood there in shock; I didn’t understand why he was so bothered and why he said he’d find you. Do you know why?”

  I internally debate whether or not to tell Lola but decide that I can’t keep something like this from her. So, I tell her everything. The day when I found the tree. The day I saw Roman sitting there crying. Our argument and when I punched him. I tell her about when we agreed to be ‘acquaintances’. About sitting with him in English. I tell her what happened at the tree this afternoon, obviously leaving out certain details.

  “We’ve decided to be friends. I can see he’s trying to better himself.�
� I look at her in anticipating, unable to read her emotions as she stares at me.

  “I don’t trust him.”

  “Lola.”

  “Millie, I’ve known him far longer than you have. Our fathers are friends and my brother is his little lapdog, I know what he’s like. He’s never once been nice to me, except earlier, I guess. He was always the one coming up with ways to taunt me, my brother just going along with them. He’s not a nice person.”

  “What if there was a reason he was like that? What if he didn’t know there was another way to behave? I believe he’s trying to change so I’m going to be his friend. I trust him.” More than you know, I mentally add.

  “Just so you know it’s a big mistake you’re making, being his friend. You’re going to get hurt.”

  “Well, it’s my mistake to make but I don’t think I will be hurt. Please don’t be mad at me. I believe in second chances.” I give her my best puppy face.

  “Fine, I won’t be mad at you. Just stop making that face, you look too cute.”

  “Gimme a hug,” I open my arms wide encouraging her to come over.

  “You’re a weirdo,” she laughs.

  “Yeah, but you love me. I’m going to go see my mum, want to come?”

  “Thanks for the offer but I said I’d meet Teddy in the library. We can walk together though.”

  We exit our dorm and walk down the corridor in the direction of the library. As we approach, Roman appears from around the corner.

  “Hey Anders,” he gives me a cheeky smile.

  “Kingsbury.” I shake my head at him. Apparently, we’re on last names now.

  “Hi Lola.” He gives a kind smile to a visibly shocked Lola.

  “Hi…” she replies sceptically.

  “See you ladies around,” he winks at me before walking away from us.

  “Progress.” I nod towards Roman laughing.

  “I still don’t like him.” I roll my eyes at her and push her into the library.

  I follow the spiralling stairs down to the kitchen, the strong aromas of tonight’s meal filling my senses.

  “Hey mum.” I smile at her, peeking my head round the corner watching her prep food.

  “Millie.” She drops the potato she was peeling and rushes over to me, engulfing me in a hug. “Are you okay? You ran off so quickly and I had no idea where you were.”

  “I’m okay mum, I just needed to get away for a bit. How are you? Are you okay? He made some awful comments about you, I was just trying to protect you.”

  “I know you were sweetheart, believe it or not I’m very proud of you.” Her hand caresses my cheek softly, the place where I’m guessing there’s a nice little bruise forming.

  “You are?”

  “Yes very. You stood up for me, for yourself. It’s what I love most about you, you always fight when you see injustice in the world. You aren’t afraid to speak your mind and stand up to bullies. You are a credit to me and I couldn’t be prouder to be your mum.” Her eyes fill up with tears.

  “I’m the luckiest girl in the world having a mum like you. I get all my best qualities from you. I only fight because you raised me to be that way. To be independent. You should be proud of yourself.”

  Her porcelain cheeks become red as more and more tears fall from her eyes. The love she has for me radiating from her skin, filling mine with warmth as she hugs me tightly. In that moment, I feel safe. I feel at home.

  “I should’ve known you would’ve been down here. Breaking rules as usual.” I pull away from mum as Montgomery looks at us with disgust. “Principal Foundry wishes to see you Millicent and he doesn’t like to be kept waiting.”

  ***

  Back in this obnoxious office again reminds me of my first day. It’s crazy to think that wasn’t so long ago, I feel like I’ve been here for years which is both a good and a bad thing. As I sit in the leather chair situated in front of Foundry’s desk, waiting for him to appear, I begin to worry that I will actually be moments away from being kicked out. I know Roman said he’d help me if that was the case but I can’t let him do that. I’m not worth it.

  The oak door swings powerfully almost knocking into my favourite part of this office: the bookshelf. “Miss Anders, thank you for coming to see me.” Foundry addresses me as he sweeps into the room, positioning himself behind his desk.

  “Professor Montgomery said it was important Sir.”

  “Yes, I wanted to make sure you were okay.” What? Have I entered some alternate universe or did he really just say he wanted to make sure I was okay? Foundry, the man who despises me.

  “I’m sorry, I must have heard you wrong Sir. I thought you said you wanted to see if I was okay?”

  “No, you heard me correctly.” My mouth involuntarily falls open in shock. “Don’t look so surprised Anders, my role as Principal at this school means I care about my students’ wellbeing and as you are now a student here it means I care about your wellbeing also. I must admit I didn’t care very much for you creating that disruption and shouting at one of my close personal friends but Michael had no right to react the way he did.”

  “You mean when he slapped me and knocked me to the floor?”

  “Indeed. Michael may be a good friend to me but he will not lay a hand on my,” he pauses abruptly looking at me oddly. “On my student,” he finishes. “I made sure to tell him that before I had him removed from the premises. How are you? I can see a bruise is beginning to form on your cheek.” He leans forward slightly as if he’s going to caress it, as my mum did earlier but stops himself sitting back in his seat.

  “I’m better now Sir. It hurt awfully earlier but now I just feel upset. Thank you for checking on me.”

  “Well, I didn’t only call you here to check on you, while it was my main concern, I summoned you here to collect your detention slip.”

  DETENTION? I knew this was too good to be true.

  “But you said you were angry with Commissioner Preston for acting as he did.”

  “I did say that, and I am but school rules still apply. You shouted at not only a devoted member of our parent committee but the Commissioner of the Police force. Not to mention the profanities you called him. For this Miss Anders you must be punished.”

  I want to argue with him but I know he’s right. I’ve been feeling guilty ever since for making a huge spectacle. I guess a detention isn’t as bad as getting kicked out and losing my education.

  “I understand Sir. I just want to say I’m sorry, not for what I said to Commissioner Preston, that was all true and justified but for ruining the parents’ event. Please promise my mum won’t lose her job for my mistake.”

  The surprise on Foundry’s face is evident, I can tell he was expecting some form of resistance. “Wow…um…here’s your detention slip.” He stutters handing me over a small blue piece of paper. “It starts at Nine O’clock tomorrow morning right after breakfast and lasts until Eleven, so don’t be late. Professor Hawthorne will be watch you and will report to me if there are any disruptions. You may go now.” He points his hand towards the door signalling my leave.

  “Sir?”

  “Yes, Miss Anders?”

  “You didn’t promise my mum won’t lose her job.” I must sound pathetic but she needs this job and I need my mum.

  “She will not lose her job.” He says, looking me dead in the eyes. It might be stupid of me but I really do believe him.

  “Thank you.” I give him a pressed smile before leaving the room. At least I didn’t get kicked out, that’s something.

  “Millie!” I hear my name shouted from down the corridor and see a dishevelled Roman running towards me. Underestimating the speed at which he is running he collides into me knocking us both to the floor. His heavy body lands on mine completely trapping me.

  “Are you going to apologise? Or are you just going to lay there staring at me?” I alter the first words I ever said to him to fit the situation, hoping he remembers. The smirk on his face tells me he does.

  �
��Me apologise? I think you'll find you were the one who was in my way.” He gives me his sassiest face and I can help but burst into laughter. He quickly joins in and we lay there in a heap on the floor laughing like lunatics.

  “Seriously Ro, can you move?” I ask as he stares into my eyes.

  “Of course, sorry about that. I just got so lost in your eyes, I couldn’t move.” I can’t tell if he’s joking but I shove him anyway, sitting up.

  “Well that’s not how the story goes,” I laugh at him. “Why were you running so fast anyway?”

  “I heard from Charles you got summoned to Foundry’s office so I was running to come see you to make sure you aren’t kicked out. You aren’t, are you?” I stay quiet. “You are? Oh God, you’ve just been kicked out and I’ve just ran into you, your day must be going terribly. I’ll go in and talk to Foundry, he can’t kick you out. I need you. I mean the school needs you. You’re too smart.” He rambles.

  I put my hand on his mouth to quieten him. “Roman, I’m not kicked out.”

  His eyes light up, “yor nwot?” I feel the muffled vibrations of his voice behind my hand.

  I shake my head. “Nope, just have a detention. No big deal.” I feel his lips move into a smile pressed against my hand. “Oh, sorry I forgot to move my hand.” I’m about to move my hand when I feel a line of wet on my palm. “Ew, you liked me.” I pull my hand away.

  “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.” He fakes innocence, a huge smirk plastered across his face.

  “Well I couldn’t help this.” I wipe my wet palm across his cheek. “Oops.”

  “Well played, Anders. Well played.”

  “What’s the deal with surnames anyway? I thought we were friends.”

  “What you don’t like it when I called you Anders?”

  “It’s weird, it’s what Foundry calls me. I feel like I’m in trouble.”

  “Well most of the time you are in trouble,” he laughs. “What should I call you? Milly Billy Bob, Millicentipede?”