by Grace Davies
Thank you for yesterday – Ro
There’s no need to thank me. Thank you for looking after me – Mil
Tree? – Ro
See you there ;) – Mil
I smile at my phone before getting out of bed and getting dressed. The girls have their extra activities on a Sunday morning so they’re already out and about. Once in my chosen outfit, I pull on my favourite hat and head off to meet Roman. I see him waiting for me at the trunk of the tree as I struggle up the hill. He laughs seeing how out of breath I am.
“Oi, don’t laugh. We aren’t all as fit as you,” I flop down next to him, catching my breath.
“Oh, so you think I’m fit?” Smugness evident in his tone.
“You know what I mean. How is your mum?”
“She’s getting there. She keeps waking up which is a very good sign but she’s still in a critical condition. She’ll be in the hospital for a while. My father was questioned by the doctors about what had happened and he made up some bullshit lie about how he found her like that when he returned from work. How he thought we had been burgled. I’m glad they never asked me because I wouldn’t have been able to lie through my teeth like that. The doctors wanted to inform the police but dad told them nothing was taken so there was no need. Utter bollocks. He didn’t say one word to me all night. He just sat in his arm chair staring into the fire. I’d hate to know what’s going on in that head of his, to know what he’s planning to do to me.”
“I’m sure he’s not planning anything Ro. He might actually be concerned about your mum. Or more likely concerned about getting caught out. Forget about him, how are you? You look like you haven’t slept.”
“I haven’t since Candice woke me up. I’m okay, I guess. Insanely worried about mum of course. Still worried about you,” he looks at me, sadness in his eyes.
“You don’t need to worry about me, I’ve told you I’m fine.”
“I know you have but you hit that chair with great force. I didn’t mean to push you that hard, I just had to get you away from him.”
I grab his hand. “You saved me Roman. Yeah, I hit my head and it hurt for a while but I would be hurting a lot more still if you hadn’t have saved me. So please stop worrying.”
“I’m so lucky I have you to confide in. I never thought I’d be able to trust anyone with this secret that I’ve been carrying round for years but you make me feel safe. For years I thought it was my fault, that I was the problem but you’ve made me see that I’m not. I’m a victim of domestic abuse but I’m so much more than that and my dad cannot take that away from me.”
My heart fills with a great warmth. I can’t believe how much I’ve helped him accept his trauma. I never thought I had an impact on anyone’s life, especially not Roman Kingsbury’s. Hearing him talk as he just did makes me fall for him even more. I lean over and give him a hug; we fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. I hear a noise behind me, almost a faint breathing sound. I pull away quickly and look round.
“Mil? Everything okay?”
I shake my head, “yeah, just thought I heard something.” It was likely just my imagination.
“Do you want to go back? I have some English homework to catch up on.” Roman gets up holding out his hand for me to take.
“I think I’m going to stay here for a while, get some peace and quiet. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Don’t stay out here too long, its cold.”
“Of course not mum.” I roll my eyes.
He laughs before walking down the hill. On his way down, Charles pops up out of nowhere.
“What were you doing up there, man?” I hear him ask.
“Oh, I just like to get away sometimes.” Roman replies. So, he was ‘alone’. Cool.
I don’t hear the rest of their conversation as they’re too far down for me to catch it. I swear Charles just appeared, I didn’t see him walking up the hill or anything. I think back to the breathing I heard but instantly shake away the thought. There’s no way Charles would have been able to be stealthy and stay hidden from us. I decide to just sit under the tree enjoying the cool breeze as the day fades away.
***
“Good morning students.” Principal Foundry addresses everyone in the dining hall. “Now I have a very exciting announcement to make. Our annual Midnight ball will be on Saturday evening. As always there are some strict rules you must all follow. The dress code is formal which means no low-cut necklines, no dresses above the knee and no heels higher than 3 inches. There will be no fornicating between any of the students. If anyone is caught engaging in inappropriate acts, including risqué dance moves, they will be removed immediately and dealt with appropriately. Thank you for listening, enjoy your day.” Foundry steps down from his podium and the hall fills with excited whispers from the students.
“A ball, how exciting!” Georgina gasps.
“Only if you have a date.” Harley mutters.
“That’s not true. We don’t need dates to have fun. We’ll go as friends.” Lola smiles at her.
“Exactly. I doubt anyone will ask me anyway.” A certain name popped into my head the minute Foundry mentioned the ball but I know he would never. He’s too embarrassed to be seen with me as it is. Imagine everyone in beautiful ball gowns and me in a tatty dress from a charity shop. At least being with my friends I won’t feel alienated.
We make our way out of the hall as Roman sneaks up behind me.
“Your first ever ball. You excited?” He whispers discretely.
“Depends.”
“And what may that be?”
I’m about to reply to him when I hear Charity’s shrill voice calling his name. I look over at him and see him already walking over to her. He just left without saying goodbye. I try not to let it bother me and re-join my friends. Just as I get there, Charles saunters up to Harley wrapping his arm round her. I shoot a pointed look at Lola. What is he doing?
“Hey Cockle, so I was wondering if you’d go to the ball with me?”
The shock on Harley’s face is evident. On all our faces. I’m not shocked that someone is asking Harley, she’s a knock out, I’m just sceptical about who it is. I’d like to think I know a bit about Charles and him asking Harley is not in character for him. Not unless –
“Yes,” Harley smiles looking at Charles.
Charles lets out the loudest, most obnoxious laugh I have ever heard. Charity joins in with her equally obnoxious shrill laughter. I knew this was what he was doing. I look over at Roman who is stood with Charity. I’m sure he can feel my eyes burning into him but he’s purposely averting my stare. I look at Harley, humiliation all over her face.
“Babe ignore them.” Angelica whispers. Harley starts to cry, endless tears flooding out of her eyes. Without a glance back she takes off running down the corridor.
“Harley!” Lola shouts over the ongoing laughter from the devil’s spawn.
“Did you think that was funny?” I storm over to Charles.
“I mean I was laughing.” Dick.
“Don’t make smart arse comments like that to me. Do you think it’s funny to utterly humiliate a girl?”
“Yeah, that’s why I did it.”
“I hope you’re happy with yourself.” I snap at Charles but not before glaring at Roman hoping he takes the hint that I was including him.
I take off down the corridor after Harley but she’s nowhere to find. We look everywhere we can think: the library, our dorm, her brother’s dorm. She’s nowhere. We give up the search as its time for Dance, a class I’m usually excited for but today I can’t think of anything other than Harley. After getting changed we file into the studio to find the boys waiting patiently. I was hoping to clear my head from Roman after that palaver, apparently not.
“Good morning girls, after Principal Foundry’s announcement of the ball, I thought it would be good to get the boys in so I can teach you a few simple ballroom moves for the entree dance you all have to complete. So, if you all want to find a partner and find
yourself a space, we can begin.” Professor Brennan smiles.
Everyone begins to move round the room finding themselves partners: Lola and Teddy, Angelica and Georgina. Harley would’ve been mine but she’s still M.I.A. Despite being mad at him, Roman is the only other person I really know. I bite my tongue and walk over to him. Much to my dismay Charity is already there, her talons wrapped round his arm.
“You lost?” She asks as I stand in front of them.
“No,” I reply shortly, glaring at Roman in the process. He shifts uncomfortably.
“I don’t know why you’re bothering to find a partner; we both know you won’t be going to the ball.”
“And why is that?”
“Even if you could afford a semi decent dress, who would even want to go with someone fat like you.”
I look at Roman, wishing he’d stand up for me but he just looks away. Screw him. I walk away before I let Charity irritate me even more.
“No comment today, shame. Come on Ro Ro, let’s dance together.” Charity says smugly.
“Millie, this is Harley’s brother Henry. I thought you could be his partner.” Teddy smiles at me, taking my attention off Roman.
“I’d love to,” I smile at Henry and take his hand. We find a space and listen to Brennan’s instructions.
We begin to practice the steps and I’m surprised at how much rhythm Henry has. We have a laugh, twirling around the studio, taking turns to dramatically dip each other. I catch Roman looking a couple of times but I don’t care, I’m having fun and he won’t ruin that for me.
“I’m having a lot of fun,” Henry laughs.
“Me too,” I smile at him. He pauses momentarily looking in another direction. I follow his gaze over to Teddy who is tripping over Lola’s feet, laughing hysterically. He coughs awkwardly noticing I caught him staring.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell.” I wink at him, carrying on our routine.
“Good work today, we’ll pick this up again later in the week.” Brennan calls at the end of lesson.
“Thanks for a fun lesson Millie. We should hang out sometime.” Henry suggests as we leave the studio.
“I’d love to hang out, Henry.” I raise my voice slightly, hoping it travels to Roman. I see his jaw tense confirming he heard. I know it was petty as Henry is clearly not into me but any chance to wind up Roman, I’ll gladly take.
I hop into the communal showers before changing. I don’t normally like to but I don’t fancy seeing Roman right now. By the time I’m done, the changing rooms are empty. I change back into my uniform and neaten my hair before leaving. As I push the door open, I see Roman stood over by the windows, clearly waiting for me. I quickly walk away from him, hoping he doesn’t see me.
“Millie,” he calls attempting to get my attention
Chapter Eighteen
The important question
“Millie,” Roman shouts again, louder this time.
“Leave me alone,” I shout back. I make no effort in slowing down as I race down the corridor away from him.
“Stop.” He catches up to me, stopping me from moving. “What have I done?”
“Oh, you know,” I snap walking away from him.
“I swear I don’t.”
“Just go away, Roman.” I huff. Why does he never do what I want?
“Meet me at our tree after evening meal.”
I just look at him, no emotion on my face. “Please,” he begs.
“Fine, I’ll meet you at my tree.” I huff before storming off to lunch.
That was earlier today, I’m now finishing my evening meal, panicking about seeing Roman again. Why whenever I begin to think he’s changed, he’s improving himself, why does he always let me down and act like a dick? I’m still annoyed with him for earlier but part of me does want to hear what bullshit excuse he’ll use for why he didn’t stand up for Harley, stand up for me. He honestly gives me whiplash.
“You good Millie? You’re a bit quiet,” Angelica asks, concern evident on her face.
“Yeah, I’m good, I’m just thinking about something I have to do after the meal.” I notice Lola looking at me funny, likely catching on that I’m meeting Roman.
“Want to watch a movie when you’re back?” Georgina asks.
“Ooh lets watch Harry Potter!” Angelica exclaims.
“Yes! I do love me some Draco Malfoy.” Georgina fans herself dramatically.
“Just because you’re hair twins.” Angelica comments.
“No, I think you’ll find -” Georgina retorts, launching the pair of them into a heated debate over which Harry Potter character is the most attractive. I have to laugh at my friends’ dramatics.
“Hey,” Lola whispers pulling my attention away. “You’re meeting Roman, aren’t you?”
“Yeah.” I say with a sigh.
“I saw that he did nothing to defend Harley earlier. I just don’t want you getting hurt by him.”
“I won’t let him hurt me. I’m going to rip him to shreds for his actions earlier, don’t you worry.”
“Let me know how it goes.”
“I will.” I smile at her before getting up.
“Hundred percent on for Harry Potter, as long as its Prisoner of Azkaban, and by the way you’re all wrong.”
Their heads snap up hearing my voice. “Chamber of Secrets, Tom Riddle.” I whisper, leaving them to debate. I hear squeals of agreement as I walk away giggling to myself.
Walking up the hill, I get a sense of déjà vu, seeing Roman sat there waiting for me. I get there and he stands up to greet me. “Hi.”
“I’m here, so what did you want?” I reply dryly.
“Why are you mad at me?” Seriously.
“Are you really asking me that? First of all, you just stood there with Charity watching Charles absolutely humiliate Harley. You saw how distraught she was, we still haven’t been able to find her. Who knows where she is, she could be hurt; all because of your friend. Fair enough if you wouldn’t stand up for Harley, you don’t know her but to not stand up for me in front of Charity when she was saying those horrid things about me, that I cannot excuse. Are you ashamed to be my friend? That’s what it is isn’t it. You spout all this bullshit about trying to become a better person and thanking me for being there for you but when it comes to it, you’d never be seen with me in public because you care too much about what people think of you. You know, I was just starting to believe you too. I knew it was too good to be true.”
“Go to the ball with me.” He blurts. This boy gives me whiplash.
“What?”
“Go to the ball with me.” He repeats.
“Why should I, given the way you’ve acted today?” I can’t believe him right now.
“Because it’d be fun. Because you matter to me. I’m not ashamed of you Millie. I know I should’ve stood up to Charity and Charles, I knew what they were doing was wrong. It wasn’t fair for Charles to humiliate Harley like that, it also wasn’t fair for me to just stand there and watch it happen. I realise that now. And Charity, when she said those things about you it broke me. I wanted to dance with you, seeing you with Henry stung. I regret not doing anything, I do, I just don’t know how to stand up to them. I’ve never done it before.” He admits. At least I made him jealous with Henry.
“Why even ask me to the ball? We both know you’ll end up with Charity anyway. Why bother going with your pathetic friend, why not go with your skinny fake girlfriend?”
“I don’t want to go with you as a friend.” Whiplash.
“Then why ask? Jesus Christ you need to make up your mind.”
“Would you let me finish?” He huffs. “I don’t want to go with you with you as friends... I want to go as more.” Huh?
“More meaning?”
“Like a date.” I’d be lying if I said those words didn’t affect me, but I don’t let it show.
“A date? Seriously? Little Millicent Anders gets to go on a date with heartthrob Roman Kingsbury.” I exclaim dramatically. “
Yeah, people wouldn’t have anything to say about that. I’m not putting myself through the torture. No thank you.”
“Why would it be torture? I want to go with you as my date. I want to have fun with you, watch you out dance everyone there. I want to have fun with your friends. I want to go with you because I like you Millie. I don’t know when it happened but I do. And I can tell you like me too.”
“Do not.” I reply far too fast. Liar, my subconscious cuts in.
“Will you stop being so stubborn? I said I was sorry for earlier and I meant it. Please go with me.” The desperation in his eyes hurts me. Why whenever I get mad at him does he end up doing something like this?
“You don’t need to answer with words but I did buy you something.” He pulls a box out of his jacket pocket and opens in. Inside is a beautiful silver necklace with an emerald green stone and matching earrings. The same stone as in his ring. “If you want to go with me, all you have to do is accept my gift.” He smirks at me.
I know I’m going with him; my heart won’t let me say no but I can’t seem too eager. I pretend to debate for a while before quickly snatching the box from his hand and hiding it behind my back.
Roman begins to do a very poor victory dance, moving in a way I can assume only a monkey would move. I shake my head at his nonsense. He stops to sweep away a piece of hair that has fallen into my eye. He gets far too close for my liking, beginning to lean in. I quickly pull my phone out of my pocket and hold it to my ear.
“Oh, you need me right now?” I say into the phone. “Bye!” I call over my shoulder to Roman before running down the hill. “Thanks for the gift.”
I hear him laughing as I rush back to my room, my cheeks flaming from embarrassment.