The Nanny: A Single Dad Romance
Page 8
“Sure. Nothing could be simpler.”
While she tears around the room getting ready to go, my mind races over every little detail of my plan. Isaac would let me take his limo to the library, but Jade would be looking for that. She’ll never expect Ivy to ride on the subway, and we can disappear into the crowds.
I won’t be able to keep Ivy at the library all day. I’ll have to take her to some other attraction in the city to keep her occupied. I check my bank account balance. Yes, I’ve got enough money to keep her fed and entertained for the day, and Isaac can reimburse me when he gets home.
In two seconds, Ivy’s ready with her shoes on and a backpack over her shoulder. We hurry out, and I take a side path off the estate grounds. I have to keep off the main thoroughfares. Jade could be capable of anything, but I can make the roundabout routes an adventure. Ivy doesn’t have to know what’s really going on.
Ivy stares at everything with huge eyes. She takes great interest in every detail of the subway, the tokens, the machines where you buy the tokens, the turnstiles to get into the subway, the people on the platforms.
I smile at her amazement. She’s really lived a sheltered life, but I can’t help looking over my shoulder every so often. I keep looking for Jade at every turn. I’m starting to get a sense of the ordeal Isaac’s been living these last several years. He must be a nervous wreck, jumping at shadows and expecting the worst at every moment. I’ve been doing it for a few hours, and I’m already ready for a stiff drink.
Ivy clings to my hand on the platform, and I have to tug her into the train car. We settle down on the seat, and the train starts. We’re safe for the moment. Then comes the rush of getting out of the train and up onto the sidewalk downtown.
Now Ivy really stares. People hurry down the sidewalks. Neon signs shine in the store windows. Shouts and taxi horns and sirens clang and clash and wail from every side. I practically have to haul her down the street. She pauses at the foot of the big steps leading up to the public library, and I let her stand and take it all in.
“It’s amazing,” she whispers. “I can’t believe all this has been here the whole time, and I never knew.”
“You can come here whenever you like,” I tell her. “Some kids ride the subway every day going to and from school. They have their own library cards, and they come by themselves and check out whatever books they want.”
Her mouth moves, but she doesn’t make any sound.
I give her arm and tug. “Come on inside. You’re gonna like this place.”
We spend three hours at the library. Ivy can’t take the place in fast enough. She settles down in a corner to read one book after another. She wants to check them all out at a time, but I make her stick to only enough to fill her backpack. I don’t want to lug a big pile of books around town for the rest of the day.
Around three o’clock, I tap her on the shoulder. “Come on. Let’s check your books out and get something to eat.”
“I’m not ready to leave yet.”
“I know,” I tell her, “but we haven’t eaten since we left the house, and I don’t want you falling apart on me. We have other fun things to do today.”
She brings her books to the counter, and after we check out, we load them into her backpack. That should wear her out.
I lead her outside and we get a kebab at the vendor’s cart on the corner. Now’s the time to put my great plan into action. We ride the subway back uptown and get out in front of the city zoo. Ivy gasps in astonishment just staring at the big sign above the entrance gate.
I laugh at her. “Don’t you want to go inside?”
“I never thought I could go here,” she whispers.
“Well, now you can. Come on. You’re gonna love this.”
Just as I suspected, it takes us ages to get through the zoo. Ivy wants to see every enclosure. She wants to inhale every scrap of information the zoo offers about every animal. The bird and reptile houses take the most time, and I’m happy to let her linger. She was never safer in her life than in these places, and I don’t have to look over my shoulder anymore.
We get to the end of the zoo, and Ivy wilts. “I suppose it’s time to go home now. I don’t want to leave. There seems like so much more to do and learn and see.”
I check my phone. Only five-thirty. I need one more big distraction before we go home, and the sun is still out. “We’re not done yet. There’s one more thing left to do, and you can’t say you’ve been to the zoo until you’ve done it.”
She looks up at me. “What’s that?”
I give her a sly smile and nod toward the side gate. “Come and see.”
I lead her into the kid’s petting zoo next to the exit. The place is crawling with little kids, two and three year olds, and a few five and six year olds. The older ones have all seen the petting zoo so many times it no longer interests them. Ivy is by far the oldest child here, but she’s also the most enthusiastic.
She can’t get enough of the sheep, the pony, the chickens pecking around her feet. First she rushes from one animal to the next, but in the end, she sits down on the ground and just bathes in the heavenly pleasure of having them all around her.
She pets the chickens and feeds the ducks. She kisses the pony on the nose. She loves every minute of it, and when the keeper comes around to tell us the zoo is closing, Ivy casts a misty gaze over the whole scene.
I take her hand. “Come on. It’s time to go home. We can come back here lots of times, and you can spend as much time as you want.”
She follows me out of the zoo, and we get back on the subway on the way home. Night falls, and the lights come on, but she doesn’t drink in the sights the way she did this morning. She sits next to me and stares straight in front of her. She’s had enough stimulation in one day to last her a month, or maybe a year.
I steal peeks at her face on the train ride home. I did good work today. She experienced new things and had a good time. She learned a lot and pushed her boundaries. She’ll sleep better tonight than she has in years, and she never had a clue she was in danger.
She’s more than happy to hold my hand walking up the dusky path through the trees back to the house. I take her upstairs and put her to bed, but when I turn out the light, I don’t want to leave. I want to stay by her side and watch over her. I want to take care of her and teach her and show her this whole fascinating world.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Isaac
I get back to a darkened house. Not one light burns in the windows. That shouldn’t surprise me, but it sends a shiver up my spine. What will I find in that house? Nothing? I couldn’t live if I came home and found the place empty and silent, with Ivy gone.
I don’t race up the stairs two at a time this time. I have to force myself to climb them one by one, and I hesitate on the landing. Not one sound comes to my ear from down the passage.
I tiptoe down the hall. When I come to Kira’s door, I find it standing open with no one inside. I want to die then and there. They aren’t here. Where did she take Ivy? Did Jade get to her? Will I have to spend the rest of this terrible night searching and hunting for her, calling the Police and filing reports? Is that what the rest of my miserable life is made of?
I take another few steps to Ivy’s door, but I don’t have the heart to look inside. I hate my life. I hate every single cotton-pickin’ second I have to spend alive on this filthy Earth. If it wasn’t for Ivy, I would wish I had never been born.
The door stands ajar, and I push it back, just to drive the stake the rest of the way into my broken heart. The door swings back, and I gaze in on the closest thing to heaven I’ve ever seen in my life.
The moon hangs just beyond the window. It bathes the estate in shimmering silver and casts its ghostly square on the carpet. Kira sits in a chair by the bed where Ivy sleeps her angelic slumber under the canopy. Kira doesn’t look at Ivy, but gazes out through the window at the shining landscape. She doesn’t see me. I’m looking in on a scene out of my reach.
I stand there in awe, not making a sound, but something must have told Kira I was there. She glances back and sees me in the doorway. She lets out a sigh and whispers in the dark. “There you are. I was worried something happened to you.”
Her voice draws me into the room. I stand by Ivy’s bed and look down at her sleeping face. “I was worried about you, too. Thank you so much for today. You don’t know what it means to be able to trust someone with her.”
Kira shakes her head. She gets out of her chair and comes to my side. “I didn’t do anything. I just had fun with her. She makes it easy. She loved every minute of it. We can do it lots more times, any time you want to get us out of the way.”
I can’t look at her standing so close to me in the dark. Her whispers shoot to my heart. “She’s so important to me, you know? I would be dead if anything happened to her.”
She touches my arm. Did she mean to? “I understand. I really do. She’s a very special little girl. You’re lucky. She loves you more than anything.”
Some irresistible force draws my eyes to her face. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you today—I mean, I couldn’t stop thinking about doing things with you and Ivy. I wish I’d been with you today.”
“You had more important things to do. What you do out there is just as important as what I do. Ivy needs both of us.”
I can’t stop staring at her face. Did she just say those words out loud? I’m not the only one thinking this. “Listen, Kira, I have to tell you something…”
She shakes her head and looks down. “That didn’t come out right. I meant she needs what you do and what I do. You don’t have to give up your work to be there for her.”
I can’t contain the energy rising inside me. Something’s got to give. She’s right in front of me with the moonlight on her cheekbones. It reflects off her eyes. I can smell her breath touching my skin. Her lips glisten in the light from the window.
Before I know what I’m doing, I lean forward. My lips touch hers, and the beautiful softness floods my mind with all kinds of wild dreams. I want to touch her, to hold her and experience all of her.
Her eyes fly open, and she lets out a little cry. She starts away, but I can’t be sorry for what I did. I kissed her. I would do it again, as many times as she would let me.
She stares back at me, but she can’t see me as well as I can see her. The moonlight comes from behind me. What does she see when she looks at me? Am I the Devil to her? Am I a black ghost out of the dark, come to ruin her life? I could never be that to her. I would rather never touch her again than to cause her any trouble.
She doesn’t run for the hills, though. She stands there with her eyes boring into my soul. Then, to my surprise, she reaches up and kisses me back. I can’t believe the fruity rose-petal delight of that kiss. She prods my mouth until my lips open to greet her. Our tongues meet somewhere in the middle. Is this really happening?
Inch by inch, she eases closer to me. Our kissing gets stronger, longer, more intense. I can’t take my eyes off her mystical face. I never want to stop kissing her.
My hands glide around her waist, and I pull her against me. How did I ever think I could live without this? Her breasts touch my chest. Her whole being collapses into my hands. Glorious pleasure washes from my lips, down my skin, to my crotch. Hot blood pumps into my cock. I want her so bad, I can’t stand it.
She falls into me. My arms close around her back, and I crush her against my body. She doesn’t tear herself away. She welcomes me. Her arms lace behind my neck, and she heaves up into my embrace. Our lips dance and skip, back and forth. I probe her with my tongue. Her kisses explode into my brain. I can’t believe this is really happening, but it is.
I have to have her. I have to get her and keep her. She’s everything I ever wanted. She’s more than I ever thought a woman could be, and she’s giving herself to me. She kisses me like you wouldn’t believe, and she doesn’t hold back. She undulates her body against me. Tension racks me down to my knees, but I have to hold myself upright.
I lift her onto her tiptoes. I kiss her with all my might, but it’s not enough. I slide one hand up her back behind her neck and guide her head back and forth against my mouth. My other hand gropes down to her rounded ass. I knead it through her jeans, and she pushes it back into my hand.
Little excited squeals come out of her mouth around my tongue. She’s on fire, and when my bulging crotch touches her quivering mound, she doesn’t shy away. She flexes her hips to push back into me. Every touch thrills me beyond belief, and she’s moving faster with the passing minutes.
Mania takes hold of me. I know where this is going, and it can’t go there fast enough for me. I scoop one hand under her thigh. She lets me lift it around my hip, and I plow between her legs harder than ever. She moans into me. God, she’s so sweet and delicious.
Her breath comes in quick little gasps. She tears her lips aside from every kiss to suck the breath through her panting lips. She wants this, and I’m gonna give her everything she wants, right here in sight of my sleeping daughter.
I won’t hold back any more. I grab her ass with my other hand and pick her up off the floor. I sit her on my hips and steer her legs around my back. I groan under her weight. “I want you. Damn, I want you.”
She sticks to my mouth one eternal second longer before she pops off again. “We can’t! I’m… Parker…I can’t!”
I stare at her glassy eyes. The heat dies inside me. I keep kissing her, but it’s all over. Her energy and passion might still be there, but those words stab me in the guts. I let her legs fall to the ground again.
She clings to me, but her eyes say it all. She’s already a million miles away—with him. She’ll never be with me. I’m her worst nightmare.
She laps at my lips, but I can’t kiss her anymore. I stand impassive while she powers down and cools off. My blood throbs in my cock. I could beat myself into unconsciousness for ever coming near her.
She breaks away. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done this. I should have stopped it.”
The iron rage wells up inside me. I hate her as much as I hate myself. “Forget it.”
She lays her hand on my arm one more time. “I don’t want to forget it. I…I feel for you. I’m just attached. That’s all. I wish I wasn’t, but I can’t change it now that it’s happened.”
The old demonic hatred erupts out of me. If it wasn’t for Ivy asleep in the bed next to me, I would thunder in her face. Instead, I hiss through gritted teeth. I slap her hand away. “Don’t touch me. Don’t you ever touch me again.”
Her eyes snap to my face. “Isaac! I only meant….”
“Do you think I give a good God damn what you meant? Don’t ever come near me again. What a fool I was to ever give you the time of day. Get away from me, you witch!”
“Isaac!” she cries. “What did you expect me to do? I’m practically engaged, and you’re my boss. We can’t…do that. I want to, but it wouldn’t be right. You know that as well as I do.”
“All I know,” I growl back, “is you’re the worst thing that ever happened to me. I never should have let myself feel anything for you. I never want to see your face again. Get out of my house if you know what’s good for you.”
Did I just say those words? Did I just bury myself for good by pushing her away? I already knew she belonged to another man. I knew that before I ever kissed her. She’s not telling me anything I didn’t already know.
Why do I blow up like this? I don’t mean a word I just said. I want to see her face again and again and again. I want her in my house, and she might be the best thing that ever happened to me even if I never kiss her again.
I can’t look at her anymore. I can’t see the pain in her
eyes and know I caused it. I would kill anybody that hurt her, and now I just did it. I could kill myself, but the best thing I can do is run from the room. I race down the stairs and slam my bedroom door.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Kira
I stare at the closed door. Peace descends over the room, and the blessed moonlight lights up Ivy’s coverlet rising and falling with her breath, but no peace can ever come here again.
My mind won’t accept everything that just happened. Isaac kissed me, and I kissed him back. We did a lot more than kiss. Those hands touched me. They squeezed my flesh and touched me where no boss ever touched me before. I melted into his hands the way no man has ever made me melt before.
How could I think of Parker at a time like this? Parker never made me feel that way. He never quickened my desire like Isaac did in a few short moments. God, I wanted his hands on me. I wanted him to slide his hand farther down my ass to my aching slit. I wanted his tongue all over me and his mouth devouring me. I wanted all of him and all of me, all together.
I did think of Parker, though. I thought how hurt he would be if he found out I kissed another man, much less thought about doing anything with him. I couldn’t let Isaac kiss me like that with Parker haunting me in the background.
And now I went and blew the whole thing. Isaac reacted exactly the way Parker would react if he ever found out. He retreated back into his cold, distant place where he never lets anybody touch him. He walled me off from getting anywhere near him, and then he threw me out.
So that’s the end of it. I did a good thing today, but I ruined it all by letting him get near me. That’s my fault, but oh, well. No great loss. I planned to leave anyways, and now I will.
I take one last look at Ivy. She’ll wake up in the morning, and I’ll be gone. Isaac will tell her…something. They’ll go on as before, as if I was never here, and I’ll go back to Parker.
How can I go back to Parker after what just happened? It wasn’t just a kiss, either. I could kiss anybody and go back to Parker. It was all the other stuff, the emotions, the sensations, the desires roiling out of my deepest, darkest recesses.