The Sweetest Sin

by Jess Michaels

  And that was something he had once promised he would never do.

  He should have fought harder. He should have battled for her heart rather than let her go. But instead, he’d turned away. He’d gone to the House of Lords and fought every day against injustice, but the one person in his life he should have protected above all others, he had abandoned to pain and ruin.

  Was it too late to repair that damage?

  Perhaps. But Juliana was correct when she said he was a man of power and position now. He could at least use those things to insure her future.

  Even if it was a future where he had no place.

  Chapter Eight

  Juliana smoothed her gown one last time as she stood outside her father’s office door. She knew she looked every inch the lady, despite sneaking into the house after her latest night with Landon.

  A night that had changed her life forever.

  She still loved Landon. It wasn’t a surprise to her to know that. She’d always loved him. What was a surprise was that when she looked in his eyes, behind the anger, she saw that he loved her, too. It had given her heart such joy to see that.

  But she no longer believed that their love would have a second chance. There was too much between them. Too many lies. Too much heartbreak. Too many years of suffering. She might have a few more days with him, at most, but then they would go their separate ways. She’d be back at her home, where she prayed that some of the damage that had been done to her sister would be repairable.

  And Landon would return to the life he’d built for himself since their marriage. He would continue his important work in the House of Lords. Perhaps he would even be Prime Minister some day. But he would never be hers. Not really hers.

  Tears burned behind her eyes, but she forced them away. No. She would not cry over what had been lost so long ago. Not anymore. She would march into her father’s office…and demand her sister back.

  Tapping on the door, she held her breath.

  “What is it?”

  Her father didn’t sound too drunk…yet. With a sigh, she pushed the door open and went to face him.

  He sat behind his desk, leaning over some ledgers…ones she doubted were balanced. The bottle of whiskey beside him had only just been opened. At least that was on her side.

  “Well, there you are,” he said, sparing her a quick glance. “I thought you weren’t coming back.”

  “Did you worry?” she asked as she seated herself across from him.

  He laughed, though there was no humor to his voice. “You have always been able to take care of yourself, girl.”

  She folded her arms. “I have always been forced to do so.”

  He hesitated in his writing, but did not look up. “Yes, I suppose you have.”

  That admission hung in the air, though Juliana wasn’t stupid enough to assume it would be followed by an apology. Such a statement would imply that her father cared. And she knew he didn’t. He hadn’t cared about anything or anyone since her mother’s death.

  If he hadn’t taken his grief and turned it into a way to destroy their remaining family, she might have felt sorry for him.

  “I know you gave Evelyn to Rafael Sinclair,” she said softly. “To settle your gambling debts.”

  Her father’s hand hung suspended over his ledger and his eyes came up. “Where did you hear that?”

  She shrugged. She certainly wasn’t going to reveal her association with Landon to her father, of all people. “I have my sources. But I need to know where they are so I can bring my sister home. Please tell me.”

  She held her breath as her father set his quill down. There was a certain guilt in his eyes that made her pray he would do the right thing, finally, and help her. Help save Evelyn as he had never saved Juliana.

  Without answering, he reached out and grabbed the open bottle. She watched in horror as he took a long swig and slammed it back down hard enough that the items and piles of paper on the desktop rattled.

  “It’s none of your affair. Sinclair and I made a gentleman’s agreement. ‘Sides, it’s too late now for her. You might as well let him finish with her and he’ll bring her back, I reckon.”

  Juliana bent her head. How callously he could use them for his own purposes and then drink to dull what he had done. How easily he could dismiss her sister’s virtue like it was gold in his purse.

  And she supposed it was.

  “You make me sick,” she whispered as she got to her feet. “I will find Evelyn with or without your help. And once I do, I will find some way to remove us both from this house and from your ‘care’. I swear that on my life.”

  Her father settled back in his chair with an ugly laugh. “That’s quite a vow to make. Especially since your husband left you no allowance and I hold your pin money. What will you do if you manage to get your sister and get out of this house? Sell yourself on the street?”

  She hesitated with her hand on the door. Slowly, she turned back and met his eyes. Suddenly, she wasn’t afraid anymore. He had already taken everything she held dear. There was nothing left to lose.

  “It would be no worse than what you’ve asked me to do all these years. In fact, it might be better than waiting for you to use us ill again. At least I would have some control over who I took to my bed.”

  He drew back, clearly surprised that she would have an answer for his cruel, vile question. And as she stepped into the hall and closed the door, she also saw his fear. Because without the ability to barter his daughters…her father had no power over her anymore.

  Now if only she could truly gain a little power back herself.

  * * *

  “All right,” Hawk said as he looked first out the carriage window and then at his brother. “You have me here and we’re going to this mysterious destination. Would you like to tell me why you burst into my home at such an ungodly hour and demanded my assistance?”

  Landon rolled his eyes. “First, the ‘ungodly hour’ was noon.”

  Hawk laughed. “And her ladyship and I were still abed.”

  “I’m sure you were,” Landon said with a sigh. He was beginning to understand his brother’s decadent lifestyle more every day. How he longed to waste the day away making love to Juliana.

  Hawk wrinkled his brow. “Is that a sense of humor my stern brother is developing? I can hardly believe it.”

  “Well, don’t count on it lasting for long. Our mission today is not a pleasant one.”

  Hawk grew serious. “You really do need my help.”

  “I do.”

  “You have it. I have long wished to repay you for your assistance when Bianca was taken from me. Anything I can do, I will do with pleasure.”

  Landon shut his eyes. He had kept his secrets for a long time. And now he had to tell them. He took a deep breath and slowly told his brother everything. He confessed to his secret marriage, to the illegal annulment, to Juliana’s remarriage and her appearance in his home a few days prior. He told Hawk everything and when he was done, looking his brother in the shocked face, he felt an enormous sense of relief.

  Finally, he had a confidante.

  “Good God,” Hawk muttered, more to himself than Landon.

  Landon nodded. “I know.”

  “I wish I had,” Hawk said with a laugh. “I told Bianca I thought you were in love by the way you were acting so strangely. And it was clear you had some connection to Juliana Breckinhill after you practically claimed her right in front of the entire Cresterton party… but I never thought for a moment that you were married to the woman. Or that you had involved yourself in such a devious plot for revenge and pleasure.” His brother’s expression lightened. “It sounds like something I would do, not you.”

  Landon found himself laughing. “Yes, I suppose it does.”

  “Well, welcome to the world of the debauched rake, brother,” Hawk said. “You’ll find when we marry, we are fiendishly protective and completely faithful. And I assume that is why you have hauled me out of my home and are taki
ng me to some mysterious destination. You have recognized you’re a bleeding idiot and desire to reclaim your wife from her bastard of a father.”

  Landon drew back. Was he so transparent?

  “How do you know?”

  “Lovesick look in your eyes,” Hawk said, motioning to Landon’s face with one hand. “See the same look in my own eyes every single damn morning. It’s the one that would make you walk across fire to get to the woman you love.”

  “I only plan to confront her father,” Landon sighed. “And I don’t know that I’ll be with Juliana in the end. There is so much standing between us.”

  Hawk folded his arms. “My God, you can be an idiot sometimes.”

  Landon bristled. “I beg your pardon?”

  “Oh, don’t go all ‘lord of the manor’ on me now. I know your secrets.” Hawk furrowed his brow. “You think there’s too much history for you and this woman to have a life together?”

  Landon shrugged. “Perhaps.”

  “Bah! You’re just afraid.” Hawk shook his head. “I have only heard a fraction of this tangled story, but already I can see you both want to be together. I mean, this woman never told you that her father coerced her into leaving you… because she thought the truth would hurt you. And when she faced trouble with her sister, she ignored her fears, ignored what she thought was your hate and turned to you for help. And you…”

  Landon leaned forward. If Hawk wanted to give him hope, he was more than willing to take it. “Me?”

  “For God’s sake, you find her in your parlor after so long apart and the first thing you want to do isn’t deride her for her actions, but touch her.”

  Landon nodded. That had been his first desire, though he had denied himself that pleasure for two days. Denied himself her kiss for even longer.

  “But the fact that gives me the most hope for your future is the bargain you struck with her.”

  Landon flinched. “It was a cruel bargain.”

  “No, but it certainly wasn’t an arrangement that the proper and passionless brother I know would have made.” Hawk cocked his head. “Landon, you made a bargain that would give you access to this woman even at great cost to you both. That is how much you wanted her. That is how much you needed her. And if, after five years, your desire for her still burns so brightly, then the love you feel for her can overcome even your own barriers. But only if you risk yourself for it. Only if you’re willing to surrender.”

  Landon looked at his brother. He was older than Hawk, but somehow he felt like his brother was far more versed in this than he was.

  “Surrender…” He shifted in his seat as the carriage began to slow. “Is that what you did?”

  Hawk smiled. “Every single day. But Bianca surrenders, too. We each surrender to the fact that we must have faith in the other to guard our heart. That the other has the ability to destroy us, but that we know they won’t. It is terrifying to allow another person to have that kind of power. And it is the best thing I ever did in my life.” As they came to a stop in front of the townhouse of Bianca’s father, Hawk reached out and slapped his shoulder. “So tell me, why do you need me? What can I do?”

  Landon looked out the window at the once great house that was now beginning to look shabby with ill repair. “Juliana’s father is a desperate man. And you know that desperate men can be dangerous. I may need your help if he won’t relinquish Juliana and her sister without force.”

  “Ah, so I am to be the muscle.” Hawk grinned. “Very good. I haven’t had a chance to fight in a long time.”

  Landon stepped down. “Neither have I, Hawk. Neither have I.”

  * * *

  “The bastard is keeping us waiting for a purpose,” Landon growled as he paced around the parlor.

  Hawk looked at his brother from his position on a worn chaise with a humor-filled quirk of his eyebrow. “No doubt he realizes you’re here to pound him into oblivion,” Hawk said. “And if I had known you were capable of such fury, I might have hidden from you myself a few times.”

  Landon shot his brother a look. He was in no mood for Hawk’s wit at present.

  “For God’s sake, Landon, sit down,” Hawk finally barked.

  Landon folded his arms before he did what he was told. The door behind them opened almost at the exact moment he did so and Juliana’s father stumbled inside.

  It was said that once Lord Trevington was a man of manners and sense, but Landon couldn’t believe that to be true. He had only known Trevington as a vile drunk, a man who cared less for his daughters’ safety than he did for his own purse. A gambler and a fool.

  Trevington’s current appearance did nothing to change Landon’s view. He wore no jacket and his waistcoat was ill-fitted over a round gut. His face was red, unshaven and sweaty.

  He was drunk.

  Landon got to his feet in disgust and moved toward the man.

  “Where is Juliana?” he barked without preamble.

  Trevington looked him up and down with foggy eyes. “And a good day to you, too, sir,” he slurred as he made his weaving way through the parlor. He spared a quick glance for Hawk, but made no acknowledgement. His brother watched everything carefully, but made no move to interfere.

  Trevington splashed scotch into a glass, and a good portion onto the table where the bottle sat, before he turned back to his guests. “I never thought I’d see you again, Hawkins,” he said with a wobbly smile. “Are you the one Juliana has been spending her nights with like a whore? She never could get you out from under her skin.”

  Landon took a step toward the man, but Hawk was on his feet in an instant and had him by the elbows. Landon tugged, but his brother wouldn’t release him.

  “Not this way, Landon,” he hissed. “Not yet.”

  He drew in a few breaths to calm himself and managed to relax enough that Hawk released him.

  “You heard me, where is Juliana?” Landon repeated.

  “The chit got up on her high horse earlier today,” Trevington muttered. “And said if I wouldn’t let her and her sister go, then she would go become someone’s mistress rather than stay here.”

  Landon stumbled back. Was that how far Juliana had been pushed? That she would turn to the life of a fallen woman to escape her father’s grip?

  Then again… wasn’t that what he had already forced her to become?

  He clenched his fists. “She left?”

  Trevington turned on him with a little smile. “Don’t worry, Hawkins, I doubt she went to climb into some man’s bed right now. Though that would be like her, headstrong girl. Likely, she went to the park to walk.”

  Relief moved through Landon, though it was only temporary. Until he actually saw Juliana and knew she was unharmed, he wouldn’t be able to rest. But for now, he had one thing to do for her.

  “And what of her sister?” he asked quietly.

  Trevington’s eyes flashed to his. “She told you about Evie, did she?”

  Hawk let out a snort of outrage and Landon shook his head. “Yes, she did. Where is Evelyn?”

  Trevington set his drink down on the table and looked Landon up and down. “What affair of yours is it, Hawkins? You don’t have any claim on Evelyn. Unless, of course, you are willing to pay for the privilege.”

  Hawk reached for him a second time, but Landon shrugged off his hand and made his way across the room to Juliana’s father in a three long steps. He had the man by the neck before he even realized what he intended to do and slammed him against the closest wall with all his force.

  Trevington clawed for his throat as his eyes bulged and his feet kicked, but Landon didn’t release him as he moved in closer.

  “Look, you disgusting bastard, if you ever speak that way about my wife or her sister again, I will personally see you dead before you take your next breath.” He squeezed Trevington’s throat harder and took enormous pleasure in the way the man turned purple.

  “Let him go, Landon,” Hawk said from behind him, pulling at his elbow. “Let him go.”
r />   Landon released his captive and Trevington fell in a heap at his feet. He gasped for air as he pulled at his shirt collar and stared up at Landon with wide eyes.

  “Now, tell me where Evelyn is.”

  Trevington stared at Hawk, like he thought he would save him, but Hawk only folded his arms. “You heard the man, Trevington. I wouldn’t take the chance of not revealing what he wants to know. My brother is an awfully powerful man now. I would wager he could easily escape charges if a bastard such as yourself turned up dead.”

  Juliana’s father seemed to consider that for a moment, then he rasped out, “Sinclair took her to some obscure country estate in Devon. In the wild countries there. I don’t know the exact location. He promised to return her within a fortnight and it has been a week since she arrived there.”

  Landon glanced at his brother. Hawk frowned. “By the time we reached her, Sin would be on his way to returning her home.”

  “And is he a man of honor. Would he return her in the proper time?” Landon asked.

  Hawk nodded. “He wouldn’t break his vow. If he said he would keep her but a fortnight, then a fortnight she will stay with him.”

  “You have what you have come for,” Trevington said as he stumbled in an attempt to regain his feet. “Now go!”

  Landon returned his attention to the bastard before him. “No. I do not have what I have come for. I came here to insure you would never again use your daughters as chattel for your debts. How much would it cost to buy them both outright, so you would not reclaim them?”

  Trevington’s mouth gaped open. “You-you wish to buy my daughters?

  Landon clenched his hands at his sides. “Please do not feign shock and horror at this request. You have sold them yourself, numerous times. You sold Juliana into marriage. You sold Evelyn for Sinclair’s pleasure. What am I asking is not any different than what you have done before.”

  Trevington shook his head. “I-I do not know what to say, sir.”

  Hawk snorted. “And now he is all false emotion. Perfect.”

  Landon tended to agree with his brother’s assertion, but he didn’t answer it. Instead, he kept his gaze on Trevington. “Do not pretend that you haven’t placed a value on your daughters… at least in your mind. What is the sum?”