Spaces Between Notes

by Kristina M Sanchez

  Clearly, he couldn’t have been too crazy, because Jamie had come to the same conclusion. Niko could tell the bastard was trying not to laugh. He coughed into his hand. “Um, sure.” He cleared his throat. “Yeah, I think we can do that.” He grabbed a confused-looking Micah by the arm and turned him toward the street. “We’ll pick up Grumpy Gus on the way, too. Take him out for an ice cream. Or a drink. Whatever works.”

  “Thanks, guys,” Carys said. Niko had been staring at her, and her cheeks had gone from pink to blood red by then.

  Hell, he was going to get laid. It was like he could smell it.

  When Carys finally met his gaze again, she seemed almost shy. Still, the grin that spread across her mouth was pure vixen, making his cock twitch. “Come on,” she said, tugging his hand to lead him inside.

  The door closing behind them may as well have transported them to another world. Niko’s skin was on fire, and some tiny part of him hoped to high hell he wasn’t misreading the situation. It should’ve irritated him to no end that he never knew what he was doing with this woman. She was so transparent about everything else, but why not this?

  Then again, he hadn’t thrown his two cents in. He’d let her lead because…

  Hell. Was there some truth to what Bennett had said? Despite the fact he’d been interested the moment he laid eyes on her, Niko had let Carys make every first move. He’d made her come to him.

  Before he could really think about that, Carys stopped and turned. She pulled him toward her, and Niko had just enough time to realize she’d led him upstairs into her room before the rest of the world faded away. She wound her arms around him and tilted her head up to kiss him.

  No, Niko definitely hadn’t misread the mood. Carys’s kiss was full of fire as though he’d stepped into the middle of a romantic encounter. Her lips were hard on his, demanding he catch up, and her hands were possessive—fingers digging into his skin, squeezing his sides, scratching his back over his clothes.

  It didn’t take much for Niko to get on the same page. She wanted him, and he wanted her. There wasn’t anything simpler than that.

  He bucked his hips up against hers, showing he was right there with her, and cupped his hands around her bottom, keeping her flush against him even as he moved his head back to look at her. He caressed her cheek. Baby. He let his fingertips dance down her sides. I want you. He rubbed his hand along her inner thigh and kissed her, lapping at her lips with his tongue. I crave you.

  Carys whimpered. She slipped her hands under his shirt, tracing the lines of his spine up to his shoulder blades, and pushed forward, forcing him to a step back.

  For the fire that raged between them, the sex that came of it was surprisingly slow. They crawled together to the middle of her bed. He pulled her onto his lap, and she spread her legs on either side of his body. It was an intimate position, one that gave them each access to each other’s bodies and yet let him drive up deep inside her. He liked that he could feel the weight of her in his arms, feel the flex of her muscles as she moved with him, and he liked that he could kiss her. Who needed to speak when their tongues were matching the easy, thrusting rhythm he set for them? He liked the way their hands could roam. He could touch her back, tickle her belly, hold her sides. He loved the feel of her beneath his fingertips.

  Nose to nose, he kept his eyes open and on hers. Between kisses, he breathed in her breath, taking even that much of her inside of him. She was, for those minutes, everything he knew, everything he wanted.

  There were so many things he wanted to say. He took her earlobe between his teeth and wished he could murmur words against her skin. She should hear what he thought of her—how perfect her body was, how she drove him crazy when she made those little noises, how he thought he could come from the sound she made when she threw her head back with a wild gasp. He wanted to plant sweeter words at her lips, where she could feel the vibration and taste them as he spoke. She was…

  Well, hell. Maybe he didn’t have the words to say what she was.

  More.

  Best.

  Everything.

  Needy. That was what he felt. As his orgasm built, he found himself clutching her closer and closer. It was as though he feared being blown apart and she was the only thing in his world that would keep him grounded. It was weird, but it was also amazing. And how could he feel foolish when she was right there with him?

  He knew without asking that she was on the same page. He felt it when her legs clamped tighter around him and her nails dug into his skin. This thing was beyond their control, but their instinct was to hold tighter.

  I have you, baby. He cupped one hand to the back of her head and wrapped the other tight around her. I won’t let go. Don’t let me go.

  Her cry of release was loud enough for both of them.

  He muffled his coughing fit against her shoulder, rocking with her as they came down from their high. Her breath tickled his neck, and her hands were soft as she rubbed his back.

  After a minute, she let out a shuddering breath. “This is so fucking scary, you know that?”

  He raised his head, blinking sleepily at her. His thoughts were still in that slow, drunken post-coital space. He brushed the backs of his knuckles along her cheek, waiting for her to fill in the blank.

  Carys kissed him once—a tiny, precious press of her lips to his—before she untangled herself from his arms. She didn’t go far… She lay back on her bed, and he wondered how he was supposed to concentrate when she was right there, nude and gorgeous. He drew his fingers along her belly as he lay on his side beside her.

  She caught his hand and wound her fingers through his. With her other hand, she pressed a thumb to his lips, smiling when he kissed her. “In music, when you’re really in tune with the piece, you can read so much in the spaces between notes. In the silence.” She moved her hand to cover his mouth and looked into his eyes. “I feel like your silence is getting louder for me.” She cradled his face in her hands. “I feel like I hear you, but how can I know for sure?”

  Talk to me, Niko. Talk to me.

  Niko studied her face and breathed through the automatic frustration that threatened. She’d come to him every time. He could put some effort in.

  “What?” he signed, making his face open. What did she want to know? He rested his hand on her belly, needing to be connected to her in some small way.

  He could see the fear in her eyes as she studied him, but she rallied. “What are we?” she whispered. “Do you feel this? Or is this just… easy for you?”

  Niko huffed, his lips twitching up and down as he tried to school his reactions. Easy? Where the hell had she been? “E-a-s-y, no.” He looked her in the eyes as he signed, tilting his head and fixing her with a teasingly disparaging look.

  Then he tilted his head, considering her other questions.

  It was strange. What are we? He’d dreaded that question his entire romantic life. The answer had always felt obvious. They were whatever the hell they were. He’d never really understood the need for definitions.

  But here with Carys, the question made perfect sense. With her, he’d been living day by day, taking whatever she gave. He’d never told Carys anything. Not that he wanted her, though he did. Even as he lay there, wondering why the hell he wanted to answer this question now when he couldn’t, some part of him was distracted by his growing obsession with her dark, wide areolas. If he could put his mouth to her breast and…

  He gave himself a shake. Time to think with his big head.

  Did he feel this? What, exactly, was she talking about? But he didn’t really need to ask. He took her hand and pressed her palm flat against his chest. Looking at her, he raised his eyebrows. Do you feel this? His heart, as he considered the question of what they were, was going bananas, completely haywire. Yes, he felt it, whatever the hell it was; this crazy pull, this electric fire. It was intense, and yes, she was right; it was scary as hell. He was terrified. Of what, he had no idea, but he was trembling a little.
/>   Her lips quirked up at one side, her eyes sparkling with something that looked like hope and happiness. Carys took their joined hands and pressed his palm to her chest so he could feel. Her heart was right in tune with his, marching to the same beat.

  They grinned at each other in that silly, loopy way, but after a moment, Carys made an attempt at seriousness. “Okay. Yes or no question.” She looked at him, her hand tightening around his on her chest. “Am I going to France a single woman? You know French is hot. The language, I mean. I’ve always thought I should have a torrid affair with a man who could whisper French in my ear and—”

  Whatever else she was going to say, Niko caught it with his kiss and crushed it between them. Hell no, he wasn’t going to sit here and imagine her with some cocky French asshole.

  “Tell me,” she said between breathless kisses, her fingers tangling in his hair as he leaned over her.

  He pulled back, searching for the right word. There was only one he needed, and he thought he knew it. He kissed her again once before he answered.

  “Mine.”

  He kissed her, and she sighed, her hands looping around his neck, pulling him down on top of her, but he resisted. He had one more thing to say. He patted his chest and then pointed to her. Yours.

  The light of her smile could’ve been seen from space. “Mine,” she whispered, and this time, when she pulled him down, he went willingly.

  “If there are two of us, is it possible to share the title of odd man out?”

  Niko made a show of rolling his eyes for Jamie’s benefit, but he understood what the other man was talking about. They were sitting at a table full of people. To their left, Carys and Del faced each other, deep in conversation. Niko was glad they had at least moved on from pain-in-the-ass little brother stories, gabbing happily about the places Carys had been and Del wanted to go.

  To their right, Micah was pointing to things and having Bennett tell him the sign word. Of course, his whole body was angled toward Bennett so he could read his lips, which meant his back was to Jamie.

  Niko looked to Jamie and shrugged. It didn’t bother him. Watching Del and Carys get along was equal parts amusing and horrifying. Earlier, Del had been telling some story about a teenage Niko trying to help out with the twins and failing somewhat miserably. It started to annoy him—what the hell was Del doing bringing that kind of thing up when he couldn’t defend himself?—but it made Carys smile. She’d squeezed his knee, and now her hand still rested there, rubbing absently as she spoke to Del.

  Looking at the conversation on his right, Niko frowned. He got Jamie’s attention with a surreptitious movement, pointed at Micah and Bennett, and made the universal sign for gagging.

  Jamie snorted and leaned in closer so he could talk without being overheard. “Yeah… Well, I’m pretty sure Benny thinks the same about you and Carys.”

  Niko smirked. The sour face Bennett made when he kissed Carys was a definite perk to their relationship. He wasn’t trying to be a dick about it, but he’d made contact with Bennett more than once afterward. Maybe the asshole thought their relationship was one-sided, with Carys doing all the work, but that was bullshit. Bennett was welcome to think whatever he wanted as long as he got one thing straight: If he was going to pull his bullshit, trying to convince Carys she shouldn’t be with someone because he was more important, he had another thing coming.

  Bumping Jamie’s shoulder, Niko pointed to Bennett, pointed at his friend, and raised an eyebrow. He thought he’d detected a low level of interest between the two of them.

  Jamie shrugged. “Wounded-bird syndrome,” he said, his voice still low. “He puts up a good front, but his ex did a number on him. You’re concentrating on Carys, and that’s good, man. That’s the way it should be. Someone should be in her corner, but no one is only an asshole.” He elbowed Niko in the side. “You of all people should appreciate that.”

  Niko rolled his eyes, but he nodded that he understood. Well, not really. He hoped whatever the heck was going on between Micah and Bennett was only some kind of rebound thing.

  “If you’re going to be with her, don’t you think you should try to find something to like about him?” Jamie asked.

  Niko grimaced and tapped his empty glass. He needed more beer if he had to think about trying to be friends with Bennett.

  “We’re going to the bar,” Carys said, squeezing his knee. Niko looked over to see her smile. “It’s happy hour in the bar area, but the waiter said we could carry our drinks back here. I’ll send him over.” She leaned in and pecked his lips before she and Del walked away, their arms linked.

  Niko scooted over, taking up more space while he could. He watched Carys’s retreating form because he could do that now, too. Being able to ogle her whenever he wanted was a definite perk.

  “So… You guys got together just in time to be separated, huh?” Jamie said.

  Frowning, Niko turned back to look at his friend. He threw an arm out wide. What the hell, man? Sometimes it seemed like Jamie was the one with the mood swings. He’d seemed happy the day they showed up to work and Carys came out to greet Niko with a long, heated kiss, but since then, he’d peppered the conversation with nagging questions interspersed with manly congratulatory back smacks.

  Jamie glanced to the right, no doubt checking to see if Bennett and Micah were still engrossed in each other. That didn’t bode well. It was the Jamie equivalent of “we need to talk.”

  He leaned in, taking up some of the space Niko had reclaimed for himself. “You have to think about it, man. You know that, right? A six-month separation sucks for any couple, but a new one? You should talk about some things before she leaves.”

  Oh, this was in serious violation of the bro code. Niko fixed Jamie with a disparaging look that told him so. Plus, he hated when everyone acted as though he could talk it out. He wasn’t about to wallow about what had happened to him, but for fuck’s sake, he couldn’t talk. End of discussion.

  “Don’t get stubborn, Nikolai.”

  What? Did he think he was Delilah now? Niko glared again.

  Jamie pointed at him. “First of all, you know more sign than you think you do, so it’s not like you can’t learn.”

  Niko frowned. He knew a few signs, but that wasn’t the same as having a conversation. He’d tried to have a conversation with Bennett, and look how that had gone. Ridiculous. He’d looked ridiculous. It had all been a flailing jumble. That wasn’t talking.

  Jamie waggled his eyebrows, his grin widening with a wicked glint. “Hey, think of it this way; if you don’t learn how to talk, how are you going to have cam sex? You going to make her read your typing while putting on a show for you? How’s that fair, huh? How’s she supposed to get in the mood if she’s trying to read your typing and get her groove on at the same time?”

  Amused, Niko smacked Jamie upside the head. “Asshole,” he signed.

  Laughing, Jamie flipped him the bird. Then a more serious expression came over his face. “Hell, who knows? Maybe it’ll do you some good. You’d actually talk more if you were e-mailing all the time, right?”

  Niko waved a hand, exasperated. Get over it.

  “Yeah, all right, all right. It’s just that she’s good for you, Nik. And ya know, I think you’re good for her, too. What you two have isn’t something you’d want to lose just because you can’t open your big mouth.” He wrinkled his nose. “Or big hands.” He cracked a grin. “Fuck. That was dirty. You know what I mean.”

  Niko flicked Jamie’s forehead.

  It was another hour before they were all ready to leave the restaurant. Carys linked her arm through Niko’s as they walked out. She was humming, not quite drunk but more than a little buzzed. She pressed a wet kiss to his cheek, and he smiled.

  Coming up on Carys’s other side, Del took her free arm. “You don’t leave for another month, right?”

  “Mmhmm.”

  “Good. Plenty of time. I’ll make dinner one night, and you can meet my kiddo.”

&nbs
p; “Oh, that would be great. I’d love to meet Luca.”

  “Good. It’s a date, then.” Del reached across and mussed Niko’s hair. “You can even bring this asshole if you really want to. Hell, bring everyone. God knows I always make too much, anyway. It’ll be a party.”

  “With Vincente?” Jamie asked, coming up behind them.

  Del and Niko both shuddered. “Dad can’t be trusted not to say something asshole-ish about the gays and the signing thing,” Del said, shaking her head. “We’ll have to work up to that.”

  The women hugged, clutching each other like they were the oldest and dearest of friends. Beside Niko, Jamie huffed. “Have I mentioned you’re in trouble, man? Because wow. I’m a little glad I don’t have a sister.” He paused. “And that I’m not straight.”

  Del released Carys and turned around to level a glare at Jamie. She put her hands on her hips, and Niko whistled. He wasn’t the one in trouble today. “What are you trying to say, huh? You think just because you’re gay, you can degrade women?”

  Jamie blanched. “Hey, I was just—”

  “You were just implying that Niko was a poor, sad soul because his girlfriend and his sister happen to get along, right? Because we’re all a bunch of harpies who exist just to make men miserable?”

  “That’s not what I—”

  At that point, Niko bent at the waist and gasped for breath because he was laughing so hard. No one could hear it, but that didn’t matter. He slapped his knees and shook his head.

  Jamie had grown up with Del almost as much as he had. How the hell was he still falling for that act?

  “You’re a pain in my ass, you know that?” Jamie said, amused.

  She flashed him an innocent look. “I thought you liked that kind of thing.”

  Jamie poked her in the elbow. A predictable fight ensued until they were both giggling like the little kids they’d once been.

  Still laughing, Del turned to Niko. She hugged him and whispered near his ear. “This is what it takes for you to meet a nice girl, eh?” She patted his back. “I’m happy for you.”