“Let’s get some coffee.”
I’m alert. Agitated. Far from tired. But I also feel like I need to do something and coffee seems like a good choice. We head downstairs to the cafeteria. Riding down the elevator, I’m clenching the railing so hard that my knuckles turn white. I only notice this when someone gets on and gives me a warm smile. I manage to nod back and this relaxes my body a bit.
Fuuuuuuuck! I scream inside. Why can’t something go right, for once? Now, not only is Aiden in a fucking coma, but he’s also somewhere where I can’t find him. And the worst part? His parents don’t even want me to. Well, fuck them. I’m not going to let them push me away. I love him and I’m going to fight for him. He would do that for me. I know it.
I calm down a bit when we sit down in the cafe. I sit by the window and take a few small sips of the hot coffee. I watch the steam come off the top and twirl in the light. Outside, snow is falling. A bad Nor’easter is coming. It’s going to bury the whole North Atlantic coast in feet of snow. If I’m going to get to Boston, I have to go as soon as possible.
“I’m going to Boston,” I say.
“What?”
“I’m going to Boston.”
“But he could be at any hospital there.”
“I know, but I don’t know what else to do. I have to try. In reality, there are probably only a few hospitals or maybe even one that they would take him to. The one with the best doctors that specialize in this sort of thing, right?”
“I guess.”
“I have to try, Brie. I don’t know what else to do.”
We sit for a few moments watching the snow fall.
“I’ll be right back,” she says after a few moments. I’m glad for the time alone. I need to figure out a plan for how to attack this situation. What would Aiden do if it were me? The problem is that Arlene has so many more resources than I do. Still, I have to try. I have to find him and I have to get her to let me see him. I can’t lose him. He’s my whole life.
Chapter 8 - Ellie
When I go on a search…
While Brie is away, I try to think of how I should go about finding him. The first thing I do is actually look him up online. I know that it’s stupid. But he is a celebrity. Maybe someone, somewhere found out about him being taken to another hospital and posted the name of it. Unfortunately, there isn’t much to be found on Google except some information about the shooting and the fact that I had killed Blake after he attacked me. Things I already know all too well.
Then I search for hospitals and doctors specializing in coma patients. Little did I know, but Boston is a mecca of brain medicine and hospitals in general. It seems like if you are afflicted with something, it’s Boston where you want to be. Frankly, I don’t even know where to start. The best course of action is to go back upstairs. Someone up there has to know something. Maybe one of the nurses, or an orderly. Someone must’ve heard something when they were moving him. Dr. Briggs and all the other doctors have made it quite obvious that they were against the idea.
What the hell is taking her so long? I wonder.
Where are you? I text Brie. No answer. I finish my cup of coffee and head upstairs.
I walk straight to the nurses’ station and find one that I remember chatting with earlier. Unfortunately, all of their names are a blur.
“I’m sorry, I can’t remember your name. This has been a difficult few days,” I say to the younger one. The one with the friendliest face.
“I’m Amber.”
“Hi, Amber. I’m Ellie. My boyfriend, Aiden Black—“
“Yes, I know,” she cuts me off.
“He was shot. They put him into a medically induced coma,” I continue.
“Yes, I was here for that.”
“Please, Amber, you have to help me. I went home last night and his mother just took him away. She transferred him to some other hospital, in Boston. But I don’t know where he is.”
“I’m sorry,” she mumbles.
“Amber, I’m begging you. He’s my fiancée. We’re getting married. I’m carrying his baby. I need to be with him. I have to know if he’s okay.”
“Can’t you just contact his mother?”
“That’s the thing…I don’t know how. She never told me she was going to do this. She just took off.”
“I don’t know what I can do.”
I can’t tell if I’m making any progress, but I continue.
“I’m sure that if you just looked through the computer, you would find his files. There must be some information here about where they transferred him to.”
“I’m not sure if we’re supposed to do that.” She shrugs. “Private medical information, you know.”
“Yes, I know. But I’m family. I’m the closest person to him and they took him away. He hasn’t talked to his mother in a long time. I’ve never even met her and we were going to get married.”
I pause. No, that doesn’t sound right.
“We are going to get married,” I correct myself. “I just want to be with him. I want to make sure he’s okay.”
Amber looks around. The other nurses are busy talking to each other and on the phone. One is looking through paperwork. C’mon, please, Amber, I say silently to myself. Please, help me.
“I really need your help,” I whisper, leaning over the counter.
“Okay,” she finally agrees. I let out a sigh of relief. Okay, okay, this is going to work.
“What’s his full name again?”
I give it to her. She types it into the computer, which is facing away from me.
“Is he the Aiden Black?”
“Yep.”
“The founder of Owl.”
“Yep.”
“Oh, wow, you’re lucky,” she says in a girly way, but then catches herself. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“It’s totally okay,” I mumble.
“Okay, let’s see here. It seems like they are taking him to —“
“Amber,” a low disapproving voice interrupts her.
“Where? Where did they take him?” I whisper.
“Amber, please come with me.”
“Why?” she asks.
“You know quite well that we cannot release medical information to non-family members,” the older nurse with big hair and an even bigger bosom says.
“Amber, where did they take him?” I plead. “Just tell me and I’ll go.”
Amber is about to open her mouth. But then the nurse says, “If you tell her, then you are fired.”
Amber takes a step back.
“What? You can’t do that.”
“Yes, I can. You will be fired for disclosing private medical information to a stranger.”
“I’m not a fucking stranger.”
“I would like you to leave, Ms. Rhodes. I’m calling security to escort you out.”
I shake my head. No, no, no. This can’t be happening. I was so close to finding out.
“Please, ma’am, I don’t think you understand.”
“I do understand,” she says calmly. The tone of her voice is ice-cold. “I’m sorry, but we cannot tell you.”
I look over at Amber. Her eyes are wide and filled with horror.
I’m sorry, she mouths.
“Now, are you going to leave, Ms. Rhodes? Or shall I call security?”
“I’m going,” I whisper. “I’m going.”
***
I walk down the hallway. My shoulders are sagging with the weight of the whole world on them. What am I going to do now? My mind goes in circles over all the possibilities, but I come up with nothing. Turning at the corner, I disappear out of sight. I hope that’s enough for now for security not to be called on me. I still have to find Brie.
“Pssst, over here.” I hear Brie whisper. I turn around and see her peeking out of an office.
“What are you doing?” I whisper back. She motions for me to come over and disappears inside.
I glance down the hallway in both directions. When I�
��m certain that I’m alone, I duck into a little room. It’s cramped and filled to the brim with paperwork.
“What is this place?” I ask, looking around a space that is only a little bit bigger than a broom closet.
“It’s Dr. Briggs’s office.”
“What?”
“She left her laptop on.” Brie sits down at the table and moves the mouse around the screen. “She’s his primary doctor. There has to be something here about where they took him.”
With my heart racing, I stand over her shoulder as she searches Dr. Briggs’s computer. My hands get clammy and I shift my weight from one side to another to try to calm myself down.
“We’re going to get caught,” I whisper.
“We’re not, if you keep your mouth shut. Or better yet, go act like a lookout.”
I glance back. Okay, yes, I can do that.
My decision couldn’t have come at a better time. As soon as I walk out of the office and close the door slightly behind me, leaving it a bit ajar, I see Dr. Briggs walking down the hall.
“Dr. Briggs, hey.” I walk up to her, pulling her attention away until her back is to the office.
“Hello, Ellie,” she says quietly. I’m probably one of the last people she wants to see right now.
“I’m sorry to bother you again,” I say. “But is there anything you could do? I have to find Aiden. There are so many hospitals in Boston. Can you at least tell me if he’s in Massachusetts General?”
She inhales and exhales deeply.
“Did Mrs. Black tell you anything?” she asks. I shake my head. “I don’t have her number so I have no way of getting in touch with her.”
She takes out her phone. “If I tell you, you cannot ever say that it came from me.”
“Okay, yes, of course.”
“Where are you going to say you got this information?”
“I don’t know,” I say, trying to think of a plausible excuse. “I’ll avoid it for as long as possible and then if pressed I’ll say that I called all the hospitals in the area and someone finally told me. Aiden is quite famous.”
Dr. Briggs doesn’t seem completely convinced, but after a moment, she reads off the information on her phone.
“Dr. Shannon Duhaine and Dr. Lawrence Chapman are overseeing his condition. Yes, he is at Mass General.”
I let out a big sigh of relief.
“Thank you! Thank you so much!” I say, giving her a big hug. She pushes me away quickly.
“I didn’t tell you anything, remember?”
“Oh, yes, of course.”
“And he made it there okay? The move?”
“Yes, it seems like he did. It was still not a good idea.”
“Yes, I agree.”
“Well, I have to go. I have patients to see. Good luck with his mother.”
Suddenly, I remember that Brie is still looking through her computer. I’m about to run up to her and distract her again, but luckily she walks down the other hallway and disappears around the corner.
“Brie, let’s go,” I whisper. “She told me where he is.”
“Really?” She looks shocked. “Good. ‘Cause I got nothing from her computer. It must be somewhere on the main system.”
Chapter 9 - Aiden
When darkness descends…
There’s no more me. I’ve dissipated, vanished. There’s now a we. What are we going to do? How are we going to feel better? What steps are we going to take? I hear bits and pieces of their conversation. They don’t think I can hear them, but I can. Crystal clear. They fight and yell and laugh. They comment on my looks. Lackluster hair. Dry face. Tired. No, that’s just the fluorescent lights. HE doesn’t actually look like this. Of course, he does. My parents aren’t the only ones piping in. There are also the nurses. They laugh and snicker around me. They know I’m famous. The ones that don’t are quickly told that I am. Others show them pictures of me in my better days. Out on the town, dancing the night away with one socialite or another. The ones that came around last night have read Ellie’s books. They talk about how we met. The auction. One thinks it’s romantic, another thinks it’s creepy. Both of them lift up my pajama pants to take a look at my package. I don’t see them, but I hear them. I can’t move. I can’t stop them. I want to push them away. I want to tell them that I’m here. That I matter. But I can’t. I’m trapped in my body. Awake deep inside myself, but not on the surface. For all intents and purposes, I’m gone. Will I ever come back again?
I can’t stay in the moment for very long. My thoughts drift away on their own accord. Ellie. They always come back to Ellie. Her soft skin. Her luscious lips. Her curvy body. Her ample breasts. Her beautiful legs. Delicate ankles. Confident hands. Soft, soft hair. And those long eyelashes. The ones that have given me butterfly kisses on my cheek. How is Ellie? I haven’t heard her voice in some time now. How long, I don’t know. Is she here? Will she come? I need her now more than ever. I need to know that she’s here. I want her to tell me that everything is going to be okay. We’re going to be together again.
Ellie’s pregnant. The idea just pops into my head. It’s impossible to kick back out. My girl is having my baby. What will this baby be like? Will it be a girl or a boy? Will it like trucks or dolls? I don’t really care. If she’s a girl who likes trucks or he’s a boy who likes dolls, that’s okay with me. All I want is for my baby to be happy.
Come back to me, Ellie. Wherever you are, please come back to me. I need you, honey. I need you here, holding my hand. I don’t think I can do this without you. Find me. Find me. I’ll be yours forever.
Chapter 10 - Ellie
When we head to Boston…
Brie helps me pack for our trip. I don’t know how long we will be going for so I need to bring at least a week’s worth of stuff. I feel sick again from walking around for so long, so I lie down on the couch to calm down while she continues to pack.
“Are you sure you want to come with me?” I ask. “You really don’t have to.”
“Eh, what else am I doing, right?”
“I know, but I just feel like my life is dominating yours right now.”
“You’re going through a lot, El. I want to be here for you. But if you don’t want me to, I totally understand.”
“Oh, no, that’s not what I mean. Not at all,” I say. I hate to admit it, but I need her help. I get dizzy and queasy all the time and I’m not sure I can make it there without her.
“I just want you to know that I really appreciate everything that you’re doing for me,” I add.
Looking through the Hotels.com app, I book a hotel within walking distance to the hospital. Nothing fancy, very practical, and it still comes up to over $250 a night. Oh, well, I guess that’s Boston for you.
An hour later, we are finally ready to go. Brie pulls the car around to pick me up. We debated whether we should drive or fly, eventually settling on driving in case we need a car there to get around. It’s only three hours and forty-five minutes away.
After making four stops, so that I could throw up and take a rest from riding in the car, we finally arrive there, five hours later. Flurries are already starting to fall and the city is bracing itself for a big storm.
The streets are empty. The few people that I do spot are half-jogging home, pulling their coats closed. Brie parks the car. We leave our bags in the parking lot. I head to the fifth floor where Dr. Duhaine and Dr. Chapman’s offices are. At the nurses’ station, I ask about him. They give me a blank stare, and then say they have to make a call first. Shit. After all of this, they aren’t going to let me get in, are they? I wait patiently. I don’t want to make a scene.
“Ellie?” A familiar voice sends shivers up my spine. I know that it’s Arlene without even turning around.
“Hi, Arlene,” I say.
“What are you doing here?”
“I’m here to see Aiden.”
She nods and crosses her arms. I’m debating whether or not I should call her on what she did. But before I can stop myse
lf, I say, “Why did you transfer Aiden here?”
Keep your mouth shut, I say to myself. You don’t want to make this worse. You want to see Aiden, don’t you?
“Why didn’t you tell me where you were taking him?” I say instead.
“It was a spur of the moment decision. And I didn’t even know your phone number.”
“Okay,” I say. That’s a lie, obviously, but whatever. I’m going to let it go.
“How is he doing?” I ask.
“He’s fine. He has good care here. Plus, my apartment is not too far from here.”
Of course, as if that’s the only thing that matters.
“Can I see him?”
She looks down at the floor and then at me. Finally, she exhales and says, “Why not.”
I follow her to the last room at the end of the hallway. I run over to him as soon as I open the door. He looks about the same as he did before. Pale. Tired. Alone. But just as beautiful as always.
“I’m here, sweetie,” I whisper. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”
I give his hand a squeeze. His fingers move a little, pressing into my palm. My heart skips a beat. I focus on his fingers.
“Please, move again. Oh, Aiden, please,” I whisper. But he doesn’t move again. That must’ve been one of those involuntary movements they told me about.
“Visiting hours are almost over,” Arlene says in the doorway.
“I’m his fiancée. I will be spending the night,” I say. The tone of my voice means business. Serious. Determined. After everything that she has done, she’s not kicking me out now.
Much to my surprise, Arlene doesn’t argue.
“I’ll see you tomorrow then,” she says and closes the door.
“Oh, wow,” I smile, kissing the top of Aiden’s hand. “Really? Did your mom really just leave? I can’t believe it!”
I lean over and press my lips to his. They are dry. Chapped. I take out some lip gloss and moisturize them for him. When they catch the light, they are back to being the beautiful luscious lips that I fell in love with.
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