“I’m sorry,” he breaks away to say before diving back in. “You’re so fucking beautiful. I couldn’t stop myself.”
This would all be so much easier if he would just turn into an asshole.
But how could any rational woman turn away a man who had become lost and helpless to his own need for her? Kade’s entire body is a shroud of desire and want in this moment. Our history is irrelevant in the face of this kind of temptation.
His hands frame my face as our tongues duel. I’ve still never kissed anyone as skilled as Kade. His mouth takes possession of mine. Hell, his body owns mine when we kiss like this. Then he thrusts his erection against me, tearing down every last barrier between us. I surrender everything, throwing my hands up and following his descent into madness.
His mouth moves to my neck as he palms my breasts through my thin tank top.
“You have no fucking idea how much I’ve missed this,” he pants against my skin. “Missed you.”
I don’t say anything because what is there to say? We shouldn’t be doing this with so much hanging in the air between us.
But when he makes me feel this incredible, I’ll take full responsibility for my own actions, without complaint, and ask forgiveness from myself later.
My fingers curl around his shirt, fisting the material in my hands. The sound that comes from him whenever he shoves my tank top up my torso until my white lace bra is revealed starts out as a growl and then deepens into a groan. He kisses the swell of my breasts, as if savoring the sight of them encased in the delicate material. Then he pulls down one cup, and my bare flesh is exposed.
“So damn pretty,” he whispers, running the pad of his thumb over my puckered nipple. “The way your body reacts to me. Does it happen everywhere, Sam? All over?”
When he grinds against me, I swear I see stars behind my eyelids.
“Feel that? I’m always hard for you.” His hand trails down my stomach, stopping at the waistband of my leggings. “Are you wet for me?”
Hell yes..
I never have hope of staying dry around him.
I need to feel his hand on me, his fingers inside me, more than anything else in the world. But I can’t blame my poor decisions on drunkenness this time.
Fine. Whatever.
If I can’t bring myself to cross that final line and ask him to fuck me, I’ll settle for this. Something to take the edge off.
Just as his fingers delve inside my leggings, my phone rings.
The sound slices through the heady moment, and we both freeze.
Seriously? Does the universe have something against me having an orgasm or what?
I inch back just barely, but the movement is a clear sign that the moment’s broken. His body tenses as he removes his hand from my pants. We’re both still breathing hard when he takes a step back, looking like a volcano ready to erupt. I sense that he wants to say something, but nothing comes out.
He reaches over to the console table where I left my phone and hands it to me. When I see his jaw clench, I know he peeked at the screen first. And when I catch sight of the name, I know why.
Aaron Simmons. My ex.
What the hell? Why is he calling me?
We haven’t spoken a word to each other since we broke up months ago. Whatever he has to say can’t be that important, so I turn the ringer off and place the phone back on the console table.
“Please, don’t ignore him on my account.”
I look up to find Kade glaring at me. “Excuse me?”
“Thought the two of you broke up.”
“That’s none of your business.” His domineering tone is completely uncalled for. “And by the way, I’ll talk to whoever the hell I want to on my phone in my house.”
He gnashes his teeth against his lips. “You just had your tongue down my throat, Sam, so I’d say it is my business if you’re still fucking your ex-boyfriend.”
Oh, he did not.
I can feel my blood pressure spike at his high-handedness. “You are so out of line right now. How dare you assume you know anything about my personal relationships just because you saw a name on my phone. And how dare you comment on it in the first place. You have no right, Kade.”
He sucks in a sharp breath, clearly reining in his temper. “And here I thought you’d grown up a little. But it turns out you’re still going after the spoiled rich guys, aren’t you?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You don’t see it?”
The condescending question just pisses me off even more.
“See what?”
“Simmons and Trent are basically the same guy, Sam! Simmons might be in a higher tax bracket than Trent, but he’s just as entitled and has never had to work hard for anything in his life. He’s an arrogant prick. When I heard a while back that you two were dating, I didn’t believe it at first.”
My hands ball into fists, my nails digging into my palms. “You don’t even know Aaron.”
His nostrils flare. “You forget I’ve been working in this business the past few years, too. I’ve been around him enough to know what kind of man he is. And he sure as fuck doesn’t know you. Why would you go for someone like him?”
“Oh, no.” My hand cuts through the air. “No, you don’t get to barge back into my life and ask me questions like this. You gave up your right to an opinion eight years ago. What gives you the nerve to judge me?”
“I’m just curious what you see in him. Why is that such a hard question?” he challenges. “Is it because you know he can’t make you happy?”
“He never hurt me like you did.”
That shuts him up.
His body stills.
But I don’t stop.
He’s got me on a roll now.
“That was one point in his pro column. He never walked away from me without explanation, never tossed me out of his life like yesterday’s trash.” Each word is a dagger opening up old wounds and making them fresh. I can see it written all over his face. But he asked for this. “Maybe he never did make me truly happy. But I’ll tell you one thing. He could never make me as unhappy as you did.”
My voice is croaking by the time I whisper the last word, which I hate. I don’t want to lose it and get all emotional in front of him, showing him in person how far he broke me. Those words were said to hurt him, yes, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t the truth. He ruined me when he walked away. I’ve never felt so lost and alone in all my life, even when my father moved out. Kade absolutely made me the unhappiest I’ve ever been, but that’s only because I cared so much. Aaron never had the power over me that Kade did and still does.
Aaron was never capable of crushing my heart so completely.
Kade was.
He’s the only man I’ve ever been in love with. But he slammed the door to his world in my face and sealed it shut.
That was the day I sealed my heart shut, too.
And no one’s ever been able to break that door down since.
Kade scrubs his hands over his face. “Fuck, I’m screwing this all up. I’m sorry, Sam. For everything I just said. You’re right. It’s not my place to ask those questions. I just—” He cuts himself off. His eyes are pleading with me. “About what happened back then… What you have to understand—”
“I still don’t want to talk about it, Kade. We’re not doing this right now.” I pull open the front door resolutely. “I think you should leave.”
Somehow, out of everything I just said, that statement looks like it hurts him the worst.
He puts his hands out in a placating gesture. “Okay, I’ll leave. Just give me this one, Sam. We’re supposed to be friends now, right? I know I might have just shot that all to hell, but just give me this one thing.”
“What?”
It looks as if he struggles to get the words out. “Do you still have something going on with Simmons?”
I only change my tune because I can tell he’s being sincere. And maybe a twisted part of me enjoys seeing
his jealous side flare up after so many years.
“I still maintain that it’s none of your business.” His mouth forms a thin line. “But no, there’s nothing going on between me and Aaron.”
Kade’s body relaxes, like he’s relieved.
I don’t need to add on this last part, and I’m not sure why I do. It comes out, anyway. “I honestly don’t know why he called. We haven’t talked at all since we broke up.”
He shifts on his feet, looking almost nervous to ask his next question. “I know I’m pushing my luck here but… Was it serious between you two?”
“We broke up, Kade. How serious could it have been if we ended it?”
“The papers made it seem like you were going to get engaged.” He rubs the back of his neck, looking wholly uncomfortable with that prospect.
Is that what has him wigging out? The engagement rumors?
“The papers always have a lot to say. You know that.”
“You were never going to marry him?”
He doesn’t deserve an answer. But something compels me to give him honesty.
“No. He asked, but I said no.”
It was the whole reason I’d initiated the break-up. I’d realized I never wanted forever with Aaron. In fact, there has only ever been one person I’ve imagined spending the rest of my life with, and he’s currently standing in my living room.
“Is that enough interrogating, or do you have more digging into my private affairs to do?”
He grins sheepishly. “I guess that’s it. You’re free to ask me anything about my personal life. It’s only fair.”
I feel like we’re both showing more of our cards than we should. I don’t want to give him any insight into how often I’ve thought about him over the years. How much I would care if he were to get serious with anyone. The last thing I want to be around him is vulnerable. I’ve had enough experience in that arena with Kade to last me a lifetime, thanks.
But I also can’t resist the curiosity.
“Has there been anyone serious for you since college?”
His eyes burn through me as he slowly shakes his head. “No one.”
I release a shaky breath, unaware that I was even holding it. I don’t know what else to say except, “Okay.”
A few beats of silence pass. “I’ll go now.”
“Okay.”
Apparently, my vocabulary has been reduced to that one word.
He grabs his hat and I follow him to the door. I hold it open for him, but he stops before crossing the threshold. I’m unsure of what to do here. We just made out like two teenagers on prom night, but then we argued. Some of the baggage we’ve been carrying around for years was just unloaded, scattered over the floor of my condo, and then hastily shoved back into our suitcases. Most of our issues are still stuffed in there, waiting to be taken out, washed, folded, and put away.
But today isn’t laundry day.
Our renewed friendship might be a rocky one, but I’d strangely rather have that right now than no Kade at all. My life is starting to feel like a rollercoaster ride of insanity.
Either way, kissing him goodnight doesn’t really seem appropriate, despite the hardcore making out of moments ago. But giving each other a friendly pat on the back doesn’t really feel right, either.
“I had fun tonight.”
I’m actually surprised with my answer. “Me, too.”
His eyes are soft, a stark contrast to the storm clouds that raged in them mere minutes ago. “I’ll see you at work, Sam.”
I nod. “Right.”
And then he’s gone.
No kiss, no pat on the back.
Huh. I guess it’s that simple.
Yeah, right.
Nothing about this situation is simple.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“Angel”
by Aerosmith
Back then…
Kade
“How’s work been lately?”
Dad grabbed another slice of pizza from the box next to him and reclined back in his chair. “Pretty good. But Mr. Canton fired one of my production managers today. It’s going to be a bitch replacing him.”
I cringed at yet another reminder of why I needed to stay away from Sam. Unfortunately, I’d been doing the exact opposite of that.
“Why’d he fire him?”
“Something about falling behind on the production schedule for the last two months. Which is a pretty weak excuse if you ask me. I just don’t think he ever liked the guy, but I can’t do anything about it.”
I was swamped with guilt, just imagining what Mr. Canton would do if he knew how much I wanted his son’s girlfriend. That alone would probably be reason enough for him to fire my dad.
I never thought I’d be best friends with a girl, but I couldn’t deny that’s what Sam had become. We’d kept our hands to ourselves, though that didn’t mean the undercurrent of temptation wasn’t still there because it most definitely was. But both of our experiences with cheating kind of stood in the way of anything sexual happening between us.
Nothing could dilute my desire for her.
But how I felt didn’t matter.
What mattered was what was right.
“I heard that Guns ‘N Roses are playing in Jacksonville in December,” I said, changing the subject.
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah. Maybe we should go. It’s been a while since our last concert.”
“Sounds like a good idea.”
I was glad to see him slowly healing from the festering wounds of my mom’s betrayal. It gave me hope that he really was going to be happy again someday. Truly happy this time.
My cell phone rang next to me on the couch. When I picked it up, an unknown number flashed on the screen. “Hello?”
“Kade? Hey, it’s Jasmine.”
Concern immediately hit me, my thoughts darting to Sam. Jasmine was her best friend and she never called me. I abruptly stood up and walked into the kitchen. “What’s going on?”
“Um.” She sounded nervous. “Do you think you could drive out to the woods near Mayfield Canyon?”
“In Bridgewater?” The town fifteen miles west of Mason.
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“There’s a party out here,” she said hesitantly. Loud music and laughter blared in the background. “Sam wanted to come. One of our cheerleading friends invited us. And well…Sam’s kind of drunk and doesn’t want to leave. I don’t know, you guys are good friends. I thought she might listen to you.”
That gave me pause. Sam hardly ever drank. “Why is she drunk? What happened? And why aren’t you calling Trent?”
“Trent is sort of the reason she’s drinking. Sam caught him and Sheena Aldridge making out in his truck earlier today.”
Sheena Aldridge.
The girl he’d been flirting with the night we’d all gone to the movies and diner.
I closed my eyes and breathed through my nose, controlling the impulse to track Trent down and beat the ever-loving shit out of him.
“I’ll be right there. Don’t let her go off anywhere by herself.”
“I’m looking out for her. Thanks, Kade.”
I hung up, told my dad I’d be back later and not to wait up, and then I was in my truck, speeding down the highway. Between my worry for Sam and my desire to punch Trent, I didn’t have time to think about how I was going to handle the situation when I arrived. All I could think about was finding her, making sure she was safe, and getting her the hell out of there.
I pulled up to the party eleven minutes later and started combing the field for long blond hair. I had to dodge beer bottles and drunk girls trying to grope me but still no Sam. Everyone I saw must have been from Bridgewater because I didn’t recognize any faces.
Finally, I spotted a couple of guys standing next to two girls near the cliff that overlooked the canyon. Moonless night or not, I’d recognize the trademark flannel shirt tied around her small waist anywhere. Before rationale could enter m
y brain, I stomped over.
Sam saw me before I even reached her. “Kade! I didn’t know you’d be here! Come meet our new friends.”
Friends, my ass.
I was her friend. She didn’t need to add anymore guys to the list, especially not while drunk.
I wrapped my arm around her, tucking her into my side. “We’re leaving.”
“Oooo, where are we going?” She grinned at me through heavy-lidded eyes and nuzzled her face against my chest, practically purring like a kitten.
Any other night I’d have been reveling in how amazing that felt.
“We got a problem here?” one of the drunken morons asked, assessing me and Sam through eyes that weren’t quite as dazed as hers.
I sneered. “Not as long as you walk away right now, friend.”
Moron #2 pushed Moron #1 in the direction of the rest of the party. “We’re cool, man. All good.”
I didn’t take my eyes off them until they were lost amongst the sea of partygoers. That’s when I looked down, only to find Sam’s glazed eyes back on me, looking all dreamy.
“How did you know I wanted to see you tonight?” Her voice was all low and husky.
Son of a bitch.
Drunk or not, that sound made my cock twitch.
Hey, I’m only human…and a guy. Give me a break.
“Come on, let’s go.”
Considering that Jasmine had told me Sam wouldn’t leave with her, I was a little surprised at how willingly she followed me to my truck.
“I’ve got my car, so you guys go ahead,” Jasmine called out.
I secured Sam in the cab and looked over the hood at her friend. “You sure?”
She nodded, smiling. “Yeah, I didn’t drink any. You just take care of her. Maybe get her a little sobered up before you drop her off at home? I wouldn’t want her mom to freak out.”
Sam started giggling not long after I pulled onto the dirt road that ran alongside the canyon, away from the party.
“What’s so funny?”
“How stupid I am.” More laughter. “God, I’m so stupid.”
“Why are you stupid, Sam?”
She gazed out the window, a mournful expression on her face now instead of a smile. “Because of how long I was with him. Because of what I gave him.”
The Unforgettable Kind Page 13