Chloe (Chardonnay Series Book 1)

by Hollye Davis

  Chloe sat looking out in the distance for a moment realizing she owed a great deal to Mrs. Schwertner. If it wasn’t for her intervention she would still be in Germany, possibly abandoned again by the two most selfish people in the world. She then turned to Mrs. Schwertner and said sincerely, “Thank you for explaining it to me, you don’t know how much I needed to know.” She became uncomfortable with the emotions rolling inside and rose to go inside.

  Later, when Cameron came home from school, they rode the fields again. They didn’t converse but galloped hard and fast. The freedom was fantastic and she loved every second of it. It didn’t replace the ache of missing Edwin but for a few moments she could forget everything. She could forget her selfish jerk parents, her mean and uncaring grandparents, Britney and all her cronies were gone, taken away by the wind as she galloped into nothingness.

  Memories that I have worked so hard to suppress sometimes swallow me whole. I want to push them back down into my already ailing stomach but like all evil it has ways to secrete through the tiniest pours and escape its confines. – Chloe’s diary.

  Chapter 12

  The Nightmare

  That night she had a nightmare for the first time in a very long time. She really didn’t suffer from nightmares anymore as she was more the swallow it down and try to forget type. However, sometimes things would force their way back up forcing her to deal with them. This nightmare was a memory that she had spent years trying to forget but with her grandmother’s death, it surfaced quickly and violently.

  She was back at the farmhouse before her grandfather died scrubbing dishes after dinner. Grandfather had locked himself in his room again. Grandmother didn’t seem to let it bother her that Grandfather was deeply depressed. Even at 13, she knew he was depressed. After finishing everything up she checked on him as she did every single night of her life. She knocked on the door but when there was no answer she cracked it open saying his name quietly.

  “Chloe? What do you want?” he answered with his usual gravely voice. She took the question as permission to open the door further. The stench from the room was overwhelming but she had learned not to breathe too deeply. He was lying on his bed watching a favorite western movie again. Cigar smoke made the room hazy and further emphasized the staleness.

  “Do you need anything else for the night Grandfather?” she had asked.

  “NO, Get the hell out! I didn’t tell you to come in!” He yelled, his leathery skin crinkling around the mouth and eyes showing his displeasure.

  She backed out. Grandfather had been like this since the accident at the worksite. He had lost his left foot, which rendered him useless. They forced him into early retirement and since then he locked himself in his room, never going anywhere, always edgy. When she took her concerns to her grandmother, she shrugged it off. She said that she preferred her work-a-holic husband to be at home for the first time in their entire marriage. Chloe couldn’t understand why, all they did was bicker.

  Chloe had walked back out into the living room and began straightening it up when just moments later she heard a large boom from a shot gun that was so close it rattled the pictures off the wall slamming them to the floor. Instinct had her dropping to the ground, covering her head with her arms. When there was nothing but silence, she stumbled up and ran into the back room fearing what she was going to find. When she opened her grandfather’s door, she fell to her knees and immediately lost her dinner. Her Grandfather shot himself in his head. She vaguely remembered Grandmother was behind her screaming and screaming then she kicked and hit Chloe over and over again. She said it was all Chloe’s fault, that if she hadn’t bothered him he wouldn’t have done it. She repeated over and over again how it was her fault. Chloe’s fault.

  She woke up with sweat and tears rolling down her cheeks. Peering through the darkness she wiped her eyes to see the digital clock on the nightstand read 3am, it would be 1am in California. She didn’t care. She picked up her phone and called Edwin. He answered sleepily, “Chloe? Is something wrong?”

  “I…” She swallowed trying to calm herself to speak. “I’m not sleeping well, I needed to hear your voice.”

  “Oh, Chloe, I should come and get you right now. I don’t like you being there by yourself.”

  “It‘s okay. I visited the farm, I didn’t know it bring back memories I thought I had gotten rid of. Oh, Edwin, my Grandfather shot himself, it was my fault.” and she sobbed. He was silent for a moment.

  “Why do you think it was your fault?”

  “My grandmother said if I hadn’t disturbed him after supper then he wouldn’t have done it. She said I was a financial strain on them and had been for a long time. That if I had died instead of him, he would still be alive.”

  “Oh, Chloe, that was unfair of your grandmother. You know this don’t you?”

  “Yes, intellectually I do, but I was only 13 and I believed her then. I still feel it is my fault.”

  “Chloe, it’s not your fault. When someone chooses to end their life it is for purely selfish reasons. Your grandmother was distraught and you were the only thing that she could blame. It was unforgivable for her to treat her granddaughter the way she did. I’m so sorry, darling. I’ll come and get you Chloe. I don’t care about my obligations. I’ll come and get you in the morning.”

  “No, Edwin, you can’t. The funeral is tomorrow and I meet with the lawyers on Thursday. Just talking to you helps but please just let me work this out. Maybe this will turn a page for me.”

  “Chloe, you’re the strongest person I know. I want to come and get you but if you tell me no, then I’ll understand. Just promise me that if you want to come home, you’ll let me know first. Okay?”

  “I promise. Thank you. I’m feeling a lot better now. I’m sorry I called too late.”

  “No, don’t worry, sweetheart. I miss you something terrible and anytime I can hear your voice is a joy. I love you Chloe, don’t ever forget that.”

  “I won’t. I love you, too. Good night.”

  “Good night my love”

  Once off the phone, she grabbed a book she had bought at the airport and settled down but never went to sleep.

  The morning light signified that it was indeed Wednesday. The day of the funeral she dressed in a slim, simple black dress that her aunt bought before she left California accompanied with a black floppy straw hat that reminded her of the ladies who attended the Kentucky horse races. Her dark black glasses seemed to make the outfit of a grieving heiress. Funny it was to an old rundown pretty much worthless farm that she inherited.

  Chloe still didn’t understand why her grandmother left the farm to someone she hated and blamed for the death of her husband. Maybe she wanted to leave her a permanent reminder of what happened there or maybe it was a sort of compensation for the hell she put her young granddaughter through. Either way she would never know and tried her best to put it out of her mind.

  The funeral was simple and the few people who showed she had recognized as neighbors and acquaintances that she knew. She didn’t know what the proper way was to act but she did her best to act as if she was grieving. She still felt nothing. How could you grieve for someone who never cared for you?

  Thursday came quickly and she went to the lawyer where it was confirmed she was indeed the heir to the farm. There was also an account created to pay the taxes on the property for the next 5 years making her have no financial obligation for it until then.

  The hardest thing for her to grasp was that she could do whatever she wanted to do with it. Maybe throwing a match at it and watching it burn would be fun.

  She seriously considered it for a few minutes but although amusing, she quickly decided that it wasn’t how she needed to handle this.

  Once she left the office she called Edwin to tell him everything was settled and she would be heading home soon. Suddenly very anxious to leave on the next possible flight, hopefully that evening. She began making phone calls while in the car.

  By the time she arriv
ed at Mrs. Schwertner’s she felt depressed. She couldn’t get a flight out until Saturday. Morose at dinner she barely ate her food, hardly making conversation, and went back to her room to sleep. She ended up falling asleep quickly.

  She woke up Friday without a clue of what to do with herself. She tried to sleep in the morning as late as she could possibly stand it. When she finally got dressed it was lunchtime. She fixed herself something to eat and wandered around the farmyard taking a long walk. As soon as Cameron came home from school, Chloe begged for him to go horseback riding with her. He was more than happy to oblige.

  Knowing she wanted to waste as much time as possible she took her time walking Strawberry.

  “What are you going to do with your farm?” Cameron suddenly asked.

  “I got in contact with a neighbor and I am going to lease the land out to him. He should maintain it better and give me some petty cash. Other than that I don’t know,” She shrugged.

  “I think it’s cool that you are only 17 and own a farm.”

  “Trust me, if you were in my shoes, you wouldn’t be thinking that. I live pretty far away and it’s a responsibility I haven’t decided I want.”

  “Why don’t you sell it?”

  She had asked herself the same question many times, “Because I have precious little in this life and this is the very first thing that’s mine. I need to savor it for a moment. Besides, who knows, I might need it one day. Or I might need the money to pay for college.”

  After their small conversation, they rode in silence for a while. The slight breeze, smell of cows and leather tickled her nose when Cameron asked another question, “You are heading back tomorrow?”

  “Yes, I have school, you know,” She cracked a smile at him.

  “Yeah, I can understand that. Too bad you can’t move back here. You have a house and all, independence. You wouldn’t have to rely on anyone.”

  That was sweet but all she could think about was getting back to Edwin. She wouldn’t care if she lived on Mars as long as he was there.

  “No, I need to go back home. To see Edwin.”

  Cameron sighed and looked off. “Well if things don’t work out, let me know okay?”

  She shook her head rolling her eyes.

  They slowly meandered around the fence line until the ranch house came into view. That was when she noticed a car parked outside.

  “Expecting company?” She asked Cameron but he looked at the car suspiciously shaking his head.

  “Man that’s a really nice car. I don’t know anyone who would be visiting driving a Porsche,” Cameron said perplexed.

  “Oh.” She leaned in her saddle trying to make out who was leaning against the car.

  She stopped the horse. It couldn’t be. No way, no how – it wasn’t possible.

  Cameron reigned up beside her, “What is it?”

  She shook her head and kicked the horse to a full gallop. When she was a few feet from Edwin, she dismounted as the horse was still stopping flinging herself into Edwin’s arms. He laughed.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked, her voice was muffled from his chest.

  “Coming to get you obviously,” He answered kissing the top of her head.

  “Why?”

  “I couldn’t wait.”

  “Thank God, I didn’t think I could take another day without you.”

  Cameron came to a galloping stop, leaning down to grab the reins of the other horse, holding Strawberry steady.

  “Well I guess you’re the boyfriend?” he said from the top of his horse.

  Edwin, sporting a baseball cap and sun glasses kept his head down when he nodded.

  Breaking her embrace with him, she turned around and introduced Edwin, who wasn‘t what she would call very friendly. Cameron watched him closely making the moment awkward.

  Cameron asked, “Hey aren’t you…”

  But Edwin turned toward her cutting him off, “We need to get going, the plane is waiting at the airport.”

  She nodded and ran into the house leaving the two guys alone.

  It took her no time to stuff her clothes in the suitcase and change into a suitable outfit. She gave Mrs. Schwertner a big hug and told her that she was very appreciative of all her help.

  She was gone from the Schwertner’s in less than an hour. Edwin had chartered a plane and when he pulled into a private airport a few miles away, the plane engines were roaring.

  He wasn’t joking when he said they were waiting. She had never thought about a private plane much less been on one and therefore it was quite a treat. The trip was very short considering they didn’t have all the stuff that commercial airlines had to go through. Edwin held her as she rested her head on his chest. It felt so good to be in his arms. When they arrived in California, his car was waiting in the hanger making her feel important and pampered. She really didn’t care if they were dropped off in Canada, as long as Edwin was there to hold her.

  At the cottage, Aunt was so excited to see her, Chloe was worried she would never release her hug. Aunt forbade her to ever go away again.

  Happiness has a way of spoiling a person. I thought nothing could touch me, I thought life was perfect, and I rode that thought all the way until everything fell apart. Sorrow has a way of destroying a person. Chloe’s Diary

  Chapter 12

  It’s all been a lie

  She was on cloud nine when Edwin drove her to school the next Monday. She held his hand and leaned her head on his shoulder. She didn’t think they had stopped touching since Texas. She was surprised he didn’t run screaming from his suffocating girlfriend, but instead he seemed to enjoy the attention, encourage it.

  Cole continued to take Kim to school on his own volition.

  “They are the slowest two people going about a relationship than anyone I know,” she said to Edwin.

  “I’m glad Cole is slow, otherwise he might have jumped at the opportunity to have you sooner and you might have fallen for him,” Edwin commented as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

  “Cole and the rest of the population didn’t have a chance against you,” she said as she kissed his cheek. He squeezed her hand.

  Britney was standing nearby when Edwin pulled into the school parking lot. Chloe ignored her, kissing Edwin goodbye and walked to Jeff who as usual was waiting for her.

  “Was that your illusive boyfriend? He must be loaded to drive a car that nice.” Jeff asked.

  “Yes, that’s him,” and she looked squarely at Britney. Britney put her nose up in the air as she turned away. It never hurt to rub in that she wasn’t a complete loser.

  The day was devoid of many harassing remarks. She hoped people were tired of harassing someone who showed no reaction whatsoever. Not to mention she avoided any real contact by learning where the popular kids hung out. Lunch was always difficult but she found with more people around her the less people were going to try to say or do something mean.

  Even with all her friends, Britney had taught her a valuable lesson, which was to never let her guard down. She could tell Britney wasn’t going to let up and was fuming about the stunt Edwin and the guys played on her.

  Chloe was exhausted with her games but she would continue to find ways to stay one step ahead of her. One day she would make sure Britney would regret treating Chloe poorly.

  Chloe didn’t think the end of the day would ever arrive but when the final bell rang she bolted from her chair, her heart pounded with the simple thought that Edwin would be waiting right outside, at least she hoped he was.

  Kim was no laggard either as they both practically sprinted out to the parking lot to find in the distance Cole and Edwin were talking. Kim was eyeing Edwin curiously but Chloe had more important news. “Edwin told me that Cole insisted on taking you home now. That’s promising.”

  Kim stopped, grabbed her arm, “Really?” Chloe nodded. Kim smiled ear to ear and picked up her speed to get to Cole.

  When they got closer to the vehicles Edwin broke off and
went to stand by his car, where Chloe embraced him. Edwin opened her door, looking briefly over his shoulder at Kim who was looking so intently at Edwin that it alarmed her. It was almost as if Kim recognized Edwin but it was obvious Edwin didn’t know Kim. How was that possible?

  That night Edwin seemed very pensive and quiet. Chloe’s stomach, which seemed to never get better anymore, lurched with pain. She was glad he was looking at the ocean when she put her fist to her stomach to relieve the sharp pains. They ate in silence, she washed dishes in silence, every minute of silence got louder and louder until she thought she would scream, cry, or go insane.

  Edwin had wandered into the living room and was sitting glancing at one of her books when he asked ,“Don’t you get tired of reading the same stuff? Don’t you want to read the newspaper or magazine or watch television? Don’t you feel like you are missing out?”

  She thought about his questions for a moment. Relieved he was talking to her again.

  “Sometimes my friends at school talk about TV. They get so excited about it and animated telling these ridiculous plots. That’s when I feel the most different because it seems silly to me. I suppose because I haven’t been exposed to these things, like ever, then how can I possibly miss it? It’s like craving a cigarette if you never smoked…it really isn’t possible.”

  “That’s understandable, but aren’t you curious?” He countered, setting down her current paperback book of the moment.

  “Honestly, no. Like I said, it seems silly. I would rather read, cook, draw, walk on the beach, dance, just about anything than rot watching a television show.” She made a face.

  “One day that’ll change Chloe,” Edwin said gravely. He spoke as if it was a flaw of hers and it hurt her feelings.

  “I hope not,” she said defiantly.