The X Factor

by Bella Street

  Something flickered in his eyes, but his tone was dismissive. “But it wasn't.”

  “You're right. It wasn't.”

  “So what's the big deal?”

  Seffy took a deep breath. “It was scary. I wished you were with me.”

  “You could've been. I asked you to be here tonight.”

  Seffy studied the hollows and contours of the face of the man who had been by her side through thick and thicker since she was twelve. “I...don't understand why you're shutting me out like this, Gareth. Tell me what I did wrong so I can make it right.” She stared at the floor tiles, forcing the words out. “I mean, I know I shouldn't have come on to you like that. I just thought...I just hoped...”

  He blew out a noisy breath. “Look, I don't know what you want from me anymore.”

  Seffy blinked back sudden tears as she looked up at him. “Maybe I just want you to tell me that things are okay like you used to.”

  Gareth pushed away from the wall. “It's never done any good, Sef. I think it's time you finally stood on your own two feet. And for once, leave me out of your dramas.” He stepped past her and went back to Lani's room.

  Seffy remained motionless, unable to believe what she'd heard. But in case she forgot, his words reverberated over and over like a hellish echo in her heart and mind. The buzzing of the fluorescent light overhead pierced the fog of her trance, and she walked stiffly back to her room, curled up on her bed, and prayed for sleep.

  ***

  “What was that all about?”

  Gareth looked over at Addison as he came back into Lani's room. He noticed no one else seemed tuned to Addy's words, so he sat next to her and leaned close.

  “Sef's obsessing again.”

  “Ah. About anything new or the same-oh, same-oh?”

  He smiled. “The same-oh.”

  Addison crossed her arms over her chest and stared at the TV. “You'd think she'd come up with something new if she wanted us to stay interested in her problems.”

  “That's true,” he said in a low voice. “But I'm partly at fault for encouraging her.”

  “What, you mean by listening to her?”

  “I guess. I just wish it would help, instead of leading to more problems.”

  Addison smiled. “I know, right?”

  He put his arm along the back of the couch. “It's kinda nice having you to talk with sans the drama.”

  She grimaced. “Don't worry. Some new trauma will have her running back to you soon enough.”

  “Well, this time I'm not going to let that eclipse what's really important.”

  She looked up at him, her green eyes soft in the gloom.

  “I'm bummed she missed our movie night,” Lani said, walking over with Malone and perching on the couch arm.

  “Hey, at least we asked,” Addison said.

  “I feel like she doesn't think we're important anymore. She's being kinda selfish.”

  Addison rolled her eyes. “Duh, Lani. That's what we've been talking about.”

  “How's she being selfish?” Malone asked, looking more like a criminal than a boyfriend.

  “Um, she doesn't make time for us,” Addy said. “She doesn't make any effort to see us...”

  “But she's under some kind of quarantine, right?”

  Lani patted Malone's hand. “Sweetie, I know you're trying to help, but you don't really know what you're talking about here. Seffy's our problem.”

  “So she's gone from being a friend to a problem?”

  Addison snorted. “Obviously.”

  “Looks like she's not getting our hints,” Gareth said, frowning. “It might be time for us to lay it out for once and for all.”

  “Hey, keep it down,” Jared snapped. “I am trying to watch the movie.”

  ***

  A long hot shower the next morning couldn't seem to erase the dark shadows of her dreams or the slimy feeling of strangers poking at her body. The Haz-Mat team had been there to do whatever it was they did, while ignoring her suggestion they make note of the strange lines on her abdomen and head. After their lack of response, she didn't bother to mention the whole throwing up blood thing.

  When she was dressed, she paced the confines of her room, trying to grapple with the possible reasons for Gareth's behavior—or her inability to deal with it.

  A knock on the door brought her up short. When Malone poked his head in, she suppressed her keen disappointment—something she'd apparently have to get used to.

  His look was like a laser. “You ready for that lesson?”

  “Are you serious?” she asked, dumbfounded that he actually planned to follow through on his promise. His frightening frown made her rephrase the question. “Will Lani be coming too?”

  He shook his shiny bald head.

  Seffy realized she could sit here and stew or find an outlet for her angst. Plus, someone other than Trent wanted to spend some time with her. Pathetic whiners couldn't be picky whiners.

  Seffy followed him out the door. After traversing another confusing series of corridors, they arrived at a new basement area—this one tricked out as a shooting range. She looked around and saw they were alone—a fact which suddenly made her skin crawl.

  “Remember the last time we were together in a basement?”

  Seffy looked askance at Malone and wondered if his creepy tone of voice was purposeful or just part of his overall vibe. Maybe she should've thought twice about following him down into an abandoned firing range. “Uh, yeah. How could I forget?” She narrowed her eyes at him. “That's why we're here, right? You're bound by some kind of code of honor to repay a debt?”

  He grinned suddenly. “Something like that.”

  Seffy shot him a not-so-good-natured glare. “Apparently that 'code' doesn't apply to selling sickly girls to the highest bidder.” Her memory of being handed over to Popov by Malone for three grand still had the tendency to rile her up.

  He smacked her in the arm. “Ah, princess, that was just business.”

  Rubbing her arm, she faked a smile and wondered when she could get her hands on a loaded firearm.

  Malone took a key from his pocket and unlocked a cabinet replete with a decent selection of pistols and rifles. Seffy wanted to ask him how he was entrusted with such a key after proving to be so duplicitous, but decided she'd wait until she had some proficiency with a gun first.

  True to his dubious word, Malone showed her the parts of a small pistol and how to fire with a modicum of accuracy. It took several tries before she got used to the recoil, and her aim was initially horrible. But after a hundred or so rounds, she got the feel of it. Malone had her try out several different pistols, explaining the differences of each, teaching her how to load and rack with ease.

  Three hours later, after firing everything from a .22 to a .45, she discovered she preferred the 9 mm Glock, and imagined herself in tight black leather and stilettos as she blew holes through the heads of paper man targets. Maybe Trent knew what he was talking about when he said using a gun was one way to kick butt.

  Despite her elation at learning a new skill, soreness invaded her muscles from absorbing the recoils and she finally pleaded exhaustion. Malone, in his element, didn't hide his disappointment.

  “Next time you'll work with the rifles.”

  Seffy wasn't quite as excited as he was. They looked heavy and hard to handle, but she smiled and thanked him for helping her feel confident.

  He replaced the guns and locked up the cabinet. “You did great, princess. This was a good follow-up to your crash course in weapons.”

  “Crash course?”

  “When you used Popov's gun to blow his brains out.”

  Seffy's good mood dissolved at the horrific memory. “Thanks for the reminder,” she said faintly.

  “Hey, you got an A for effort on that one.”

  “God, Malone, that's sick.”

  He smiled. Seffy wondered what Lani saw in him. “So,” she said conversationally, “did anyone ever figure out why Popov
was infecting people with a zombie virus?”

  “You mean you haven't figured that out on your own?”

  “Should I have?”

  Her dark brows slanted over his eyes. “How's your own infection going?”

  “It's healing...slowly.”

  “So no urge to bite anyone?"

  Seffy remembered the dream about going after that little girl. She swallowed. “No.”

  His expression cleared. “That's good. Did they ever figure out why you survived?”

  “Malone, maybe if you answer some of my questions, I'll answer some of yours. Why was Popov doing what he did?”

  His features became mulish. “Popov used to work for the compound. He got kicked out, but wanted back in, but didn't have the firepower with the few of us who went with him.”

  “You went with him?”

  “It was a mistake,” he growled.

  “Why did he get kicked out?”

  “Guess you're not as smart as I thought you were.”

  Seffy rolled her eyes. “You've never thought of me that way.”

  He grinned suddenly and swept her body with an appreciative look. “You might be right. But about Popov—let's just say the goal wasn't to make monsters. That was an unfortunate result. Popov simply decided to exploit it in retaliation.”

  She figured he was hinting at something dark, but wasn't sure what. “What was the original goal?”

  “You know what, Princess? I've said too much. I like it here. Lani likes me here. Let's leave it at that.”

  Seffy tried to hide the distaste she felt at the idea of him and sweet, vulnerable Lani together. “Fine.”

  He turned and led the way out of the basement. Seffy didn't even try to make sense of the directions they took. “You seem to know this place pretty well. Want to tell me where the medical records are kept?”

  “No.”

  Sheesh, he was a tough nut and all that. Maybe he didn't like specific questions. “When we were in the desert, you told Addison apocalypse is the end of the world as we know it.”

  He turned back to her. “Yeah?”

  “Am I...are we ever going to leave this place?”

  He jammed his hands in his pockets and didn't answer right away. “Enough with the questions, Princess.”

  Seffy kept silent, turning over his vague answers, looking for some hidden meaning. Gareth would probably understand the subtext of what Malone meant. Even Trent might. Why couldn't she? Or was it because she was afraid of the answers?

  When they arrived back at her room, she thanked him for his time and closed the door on his scary face. As she sank onto the edge of her bed, the distraction of the last several hours faded before the specter of her current state—what good did mad gun skillz do her when Gareth still rejected her?

  ***

  “Are you decent?”

  Seffy sat up in bed and, shoving her hair from her face, saw Lani coming into her room. “I think the word needed here is 'violated'.” She'd fallen asleep on top of her covers the night before and had been brought out of yet another hellish nightmare by the Haz Mat team. For once she was thankful for their presence. They'd interrupted a dream where Gareth rebuffed her in new and humiliating ways.

  “Yeah, I saw those medical people in their silver suits leaving. Are they paranoid or what?”

  “Both.”

  Lani came in and sat on the edge of the bed. “Soooo, we need to talk.”

  Seffy braced herself at her unfamiliar tone. “What, did Gareth say something?” She was having a hard time separating dreams from reality. Was Gareth just not into her or did he actually hate her?

  Lani shook her head, her shiny brown hair making a curtain over her face. She ran her fingers over the bedspread. “No, I just picked up on a vibe is all.”

  “I know he isn't happy with me. And it's my fault.”

  “Yeah.”

  Seffy looked at her friend in veiled surprise. That wasn't quite the response she was expecting.

  Lani cleared her throat and steepled her fingers together. “You see, the thing is, Sef, you've been kind of using Gareth. And I think he's tired of it.”

  Straightening, Seffy tried to figure out where her friend was coming from, but gave up and decided to go for broke. “How do you mean?”

  Lani wrinkled her forehead. “It's just like you keep him at a distance until you need him. Then you expect him to jump to your side, just like that.”

  Seffy didn't follow. “Is there a specific time you're referring to? Because we all have depended on—and supported—each other over the years.”

  “I think you do a little more depending than supporting.” Lani tucked her hair behind her ear, her guileless blue eyes belying the sharpness of her words.

  Seffy struggled to take in her meaning. “I'm sorry, Lani, I guess I just don't get where you're coming from. Why here? Why now?”

  Lani stood up, her pretty features souring. “I told her you wouldn't understand.”

  “Told who?”

  “Addison. She wanted to talk with you about this, but I thought I could try first. I guess I wasn't expecting you to be so selfish.”

  Seffy put up her hands. “Okay, I am seriously missing something here.” Was she still asleep, having yet another nightmare?

  Lani nodded. “Yes, you are missing something, and I can't say I'm shocked.” She stood and headed for the door. Her hand on the knob, she turned back. “I think it's best if you just stayed away from us for a while.”

  As Seffy watched her leave, a surge of disbelief made her want to choke. A thousand retorts burgeoned in her mind. You know maybe I'm a little confused because I've had the crap beat out of me—more than once, have been shot at, and oh, yeah, WAS INFECTED WITH A ZOMBIE VIRUS. Breathing hard, she fought the rush of tears to her eyes, preferring anger to despair. Determined to get herself under control, she jumped out of bed and marched to the bathroom.

  But seeing her stupid two-tone hair and putting on ugly clothes didn't help improve her mood. Another suffocating need for escape pulled at her. But there was nowhere to go. Her door opened. Seffy looked up from where she sat on the bed and saw Addison walk in. “Not you, too.”

  Addison put her hands on her hips. “Why didn't you listen to Lani?”

  Seffy balled her fists, still in disbelief her friends were speaking to her this way. Do I deserve it? Am I really as awful as they're implying? “Who says I didn't? I'm not coming near you, am I?”

  Addison's green eyes narrowed. “You don't get what the problem is, do you? You don't see what we've all been noticing for some time.”

  “Which is?” Seffy said wearily, suddenly too tired to care.

  “You think you can diss us for movie night then walk in and demand Gareth go somewhere and talk.”

  Seffy jumped off the bed. “How many movies can you guys watch? Isn't anyone interested in getting out of here?”

  “Do you know when this started?”

  Seffy sighed. “I bet you're going to tell me.”

  “In the sixth grade. Gareth, Lani and I were a tight group since kindergarten. Then you showed up that year, and Gareth only had eyes for you.”

  Her eyebrows shot up in disbelief. “Really.”

  “Really. He took your side no matter what, leaving Lani and I to feel like second-class citizens.”

  “So what, you've been burning with rage about this for the last decade? And now, when we're all going through hell, you decide to dump this on me?”

  Addison's mouth tightened. “We overlooked it until Verity came into the picture.”

  “Verity.” Could this get any more bizarre?

  “Yeah, you know, Gareth's girlfriend. The one you keep forgetting about?”

  “I didn't know they were that serious. I thought they'd just gone out a few times.” As soon as the words left her mouth, Seffy experienced a pang of guilt. Okay, so she'd been jealous of the drop-dead gorgeous blonde bombshell who'd staked out Gareth territory as her own, but Seffy had done nothin
g more than send Verity stink-eye a few times when she wasn't looking. Mostly because Gareth could do so much better.

  “Well, you did your best to keep things from getting serious.”

  Seffy snorted. “Am I on some soap opera, because this is nuts!”

  “How typical that you want to avoid the subject.”

  “Addison, I never had a problem with Verity. I never tried to stop her and Gareth from...whatever.”

  “I can tell you're lying. And there's part of me that wonders if you didn't have something to do with her absence.”

  Yep. More bizarre. “Like what?”

  “You tell me. You were with her when the blast happened.”

  “Addison, I don't know why Verity didn't accompany me on my trip to Apocalypseland.”

  “But the moment you realized she was out of the picture, you went after Gareth.”

  Seffy lifted her chin. Maybe. But he didn't seem to mind. At first. “As you can see, Gareth has made his decision about me. You're wasting your time here.”

  “I don't think so. Since you don't seem to respond to subtlety, I'm laying it out nice and plain. Stay away from us, Seffy. We don't want you around us any more.”

  Heart pounding hard, Seffy didn't know how to respond. Even after Gareth's and Lani's words, she still felt blind-sided. These were her best friends. They'd banded together under extreme circumstances and stuck it out. God, they lived together. When they got back to L.A. did they expect her to move out?

  Addison stared at her, arms crossed, as if waiting for a response. Seffy didn't have a clue what to say. None of this made sense. Had Gareth been telling them something she didn't know about? Why this drama all of a sudden? Like there wasn't enough to keep them occupied? Exhaustion weighed her down. She lifted up her hands in a gesture of surrender. “Whatever, Addy. I'll stay away. It won't be hard since I can't eat with you guys or go anywhere.”

  The redhead took her measure and seemed mollified. “Just make sure you keep it that way.”

  Seffy was thinking of a few choice phrases to send Addison's way when there was a knock on the door. She felt like saying Next.

  A head popped in. Fiona with her big brown eyes and pixie haircut—like an evil Tinkerbell—smiled and blinked rapidly. Oh great, this is all I need. The uber-bitch who makes Addison look like Mary Had a Little Lamb.