There's No Such Thing As Monsters: Gaslamp Faeries Series, Book 1

by Ren Ryder

  I ground my teeth and clenched my jaw hard enough to make teeth creak. Greaves and Maddox both fixed me with serious stares. I looked away. Faces of people I knew flashed through my mind, and I had to grip the table to keep myself from bolting off right that moment to assure myself of their safety.

  No, running off without thought or preparation would put everyone in even more danger, including the survivors being kept safe by the Duke. Before anything else, I took a deep breath and centered myself.

  “Kal m’boy?” Greaves asked, the concern plain on his face and in his tone.

  “Uhm, yeah— sorry.” I smiled apologetically and stopped trying to strangle the table. “Lost myself for a bit there. I’m alright.”

  I felt something tug at the roots of my hair atop my skull. “Lighten up, Kal-baby~ it’s not your fault they squandered the lives you saved!” Bell said, her voice chipper and sickly sweet.

  I hadn’t seen Bell since we’d been seated for dinner, so her reappearance came as a surprise. Apparently she’d had her fill of whatever trouble she’d gotten herself into while she was away. I apologized internally to whoever may have become the targets of said amusements.

  “Hey, have you been eating without me?! What about me? What about my dinner? You don’t want me to die, do you?!”

  I yawned and waved the faery off. I most certainly wasn’t going to do that in public.

  My eyes flicked from Maddox, to Greaves, and then landed upon Koji, who met my searching gaze before winking imperceptibly beneath the shadow of his floppy hat.

  I’d long learned to shy away from recognizing sights unseen when in the company of others. So, I ignored Bell’s comment while promising myself to broach the subject with Koji later in private.

  Somehow, that little miscreant managed to calm me down.

  “Hey! You’re thinking rude thoughts about me, aren’t you? Hey, whitey! I’m talking to you, don’t you dare ignore me!"

  I shifted in my seat and scratched the stubble on my neck. “Anything else? Has there been any information gathered about Ouroboros? Its structure? Distribution? Numbers?”

  Greaves answered, a slight smile on his lips. “From what we could scrounge together through informants— the ones not too terrified to talk that is— best we can tell, there are several dozen scouring the city.”

  The Duke held up a hand to forestall further conversation, and I bit the inside of my lip. “Young man, you’ve nothing to gain by involving yourself further in these sordid affairs. Ouroboros is a powerful organization with deep pockets, and, I suspect, ties to the nobility— but they know that to reach into the light will cost them an arm. You will be safe here, amongst the others. This mess will die down, and all will return to how it was before, given time.”

  Except things will never be the same for Father Gregory, the nameless who get caught up in the ensuing street wars, and all those grieving lives lost to the incidents.

  A nameless dread crept up my spine and a wave of sadness crashed over me. Nervous energy filled my body, and I struggled to remain seated while retaining the appearance of calm. I hid my face behind my cup of coffee, which I downed in a few undignified gulps.

  “As much as I appreciate what you’ve all done for me, I can’t leave things the way they are,” I paused to gather my resolve, “I’m sorry to impose myself upon you further, Your Grace, but might I trouble you to look after my little sister?”

  The question clearly caught the dignified noble off guard. His teacup wavered in his hand. It clattered as he set it down upon its plate.

  “Why of course, but what will you be doing? Don’t tell me you intend to make a spectacle of yourself.”

  Greaves was more amenable to my idea. “Don’t be so hasty to dismiss the boy, Regulus. I’ll stake my knighthood on this lad. I trust him, and I trust him to do the right thing. Think about it. We can turn the tables on those filthy rats!”

  “Mmm… yes, this is good. And young master Kal has already proven his mettle as well as his… martial prowess.” Koji winked slyly at me as he delivered the last bit.

  My grin was wolfish. “What better way is there to draw the attention of a hunting dog than to dangle its prize right in front of it? I’ll dance a merry tune for them if I have to, but I won’t allow any more innocent lives to be lost. I won’t,” I said firmly.

  Bell clapped merrily. “Ooh, a bloody ball?! What fun!” Her humor, as always, was off-beat.

  Chapter Seven

  “You’ll come back, won’t you Kal?” Sammie’s emerald eyes were filled with fearful trepidation.

  I bent down to pat Sammie’s head reassuringly. “Of course I will. Didn’t I promise I’d be by your side no matter what? It’ll only be for a little while, but this is something I have to do so we can be together.”

  Sammie shook her head, mute. She was trying not to cry.

  “Look at me.” I grabbed her gently by the chin so she would meet my gaze. “Have you ever known your big brother to break a promise?”

  “No, never,” Sammie said, her voice a bit petulant.

  I enveloped her little hands in mine. “And I won’t break this one, either. Greaves and Koji and the Duke and the rest will take real good care of you while I’m gone, you just try not to get so comfortable here that you forget about me,” I joked lightly as I pinched Sammie’s rosy cheeks, which were puffed out in frustration.

  Bell bonked her diminutive chest with her fist. “Don’t you worry, cute-tasty-looking little girl! Your big sis will take real good care of your big bro while he’s up to no good!”

  Her name is Sammie. Do you really not remember? Stupid sylph.

  I glanced out the floor-to-ceiling window to see true dark had fallen on New London.

  The cloudless sky beckoned.

  My pack sat by the door, stuffed to the brim with provisions provided by what I was coming to think was good-natured generosity on the Duke’s part. Regardless of his intentions, however, I had a part to play. And I’d play it to the bitter end if it meant Sammie would be safe.

  Dressed all in black, I looked like some sort of rogue or assassin as I snuck out of Duke Maddox’s estate. Despite the gooseflesh that rose on the skin of my arms, the cool night air tasted fresh on my tongue. Being proactive despite the risks made me feel like a weight had been lifted from my chest. I could breathe easier. I crept from shadow to shadow until I reached the wrought-iron fence at the edge of the grounds.

  Throwing my weight up and to the side, I leapt off the well-manicured lawn and flipped over the enclosure, lightly touching the steepled fence with one hand as I went by. I landed in a crouch and flowed into a roll to disperse my momentum, my new tailored cloak billowing around me.

  I rose and walked off with a casual gait and confident air to fool the regular Watch patrols passing by at regular intervals.

  Immediately after I left the Upper Quarter, where the nobility and ultra-rich of New London made their home, I sensed a murderous presence stalking me. I hadn’t expected to run into trouble so soon.

  Right when I entered the Middle Quarter, though? Hmm.

  That said, I’d had my hood thrown back to bait just this sort of encounter. Still, I didn’t want the first Ouroboros grunt to catch my scent calling all his friends down on my head before I had a chance to get my bearings.

  Bell’s arms poked out of the specially sewn outer pocket of my jacket, followed by her head. She must have felt the change in my demeanor, or else caught wind of the bloodthirst herself.

  The sylph yawned and stretched, her eyes watering. “What an inconsiderate fellow, interrupting a lady’s nap without warning! Well, I do doubt they expected you to scurry out of whatever hole you had been so successfully hiding in up ’til now~ they don’t yet know you like I do!”

  I spotted a large drainage pipe for roof runoff that was strapped heavily to the side of a long three-story building— an inn with a bar by the looks and sound of it— I was approaching. I used the pipe as an impromptu ladder, molding my feet to
the wall and pulling with my arms as I walked up the side of the building.

  As I passed by a poorly lit room three stories up, I heard the distinct sounds of passionate lovemaking filtering through the window. Thankfully, I escaped the voyeur role once I pulled myself up and over the roof’s lip.

  Carefully, so as to make sure as little sound as possible would carry through to the floor below, I set my full weight on the roof and hid my profile behind a chimney stack.

  “Hehehe, I’ll be righttt back!” Bell dove off the side of the building in a downward diving arc that, more than likely, would lead her into the midst of a scene of passion.

  I don’t want to know. I really, really, don’t want to know.

  I hid from the truth and focused on the events unfolding before me. My pursuer now had a choice: follow me up the side of the building, or run off to raise an alarm. If they ran off, they'd risk losing me, of course. I’d driven them into a corner.

  My pursuer took the bait, hook, line, and sinker. At first the pipe rattled lightly against the side of the building. The energy then transferred to the drains along the roofline, accompanied by a horrible screeching noise. It was around then that I decided to change tactics from lying in wait to playing a more active role.

  I stalked forward and hopped up on the roof’s edge to get a better look at what was going on below. Three quarters of the way up and past the point of no return, my pursuer was shimmying up the remaining length of pipe to the roof with a harried look on his face.

  I soon discovered the reason for my windfall, a degenerate faery with a taste for mischief and mayhem. “What happened to our deal?! I thought I made our contract airtight. You couldn’t hurt a fly without my say so!”

  The Ouroboros grunt caught sight of me. “Ah, hah! You finally show your face, Kal the outcast! Yes, we know all about you, you and your sister!”

  I scrutinized the area, looking for changes in the landscape. It looked to me like Bell had either weakened or separated the metal strapping that secured the drainage system to the inn. She was currently perched just below me, her taloned fingers poised over the lynchpin that I had little doubt would bring the whole thing crashing down right as the poor guy was about to claw his way to safety.

  Bell stuck out her tongue. “What ever do you mean, Mr. Contractor? Lives are clearly at stake! Don’t try to make little ol’ me out to be some sort of villain! I’m cuteness incarnate you know~” She grinned wickedly, making her seem more bloodsucking monster than cuteness incarnate.

  The shimmying worm stopped his earnest assent for a moment to fix me with a wide-eyed stare. “Who the hell do you think you’re talking to, you, you— white demon!” On his inner forearm, I clearly spotted Ouroboros’s mark.

  I waved tiredly in Bell’s general direction. “Whatever, do what you want.”

  My would-be assailant menaced me with his knife from his unstable perch. I crouched a few feet outside his reach, but it might as well have been a mile. “Are you ignoring me? You are ignoring me, aren’t you?!”

  Bell smirked and slashed. “Don’t worry, this probably won’t kill him!”

  I sighed. “The truth is you’re just bored and hungry, aren’t you?”

  “Are you psychic?! Oh Kal, my esteemed contractor, how you reach the heart of the matter so effortlessly is truly divine~”

  I sighed again and caught the poorly thrown dagger from out the air. It crashed into my palm pommel first. I hefted the dagger, no, it was a stiletto, in one hand before stuffing it into a loop on my belt for safekeeping. By the time Ouroboros decided it was through with me, likely as not, they’d provide me with an armory’s worth of castaways.

  The drainage pipe along with part of the roofline and most of the drainage gutter crashed into the street below. An enormous crash resounded throughout the Middle Quarter. Beneath the dust and property destruction crawled a single worm, battered and bruised, but still alive. I felt relief at seeing him still alive.

  “You might as well give up and turn yourself in, before you regret it! The might of Ouroboros will bear down on you until you’ve been crushed beneath its booted heel like the bug you are! There won’t be enough left of you to bury once we’re done with you! Everyone you hold dear, everyone you’ve ever known will be made an example of! No one messes with Ouroboros and lives, you hear?!”

  This idiot keeps antagonizing me. I wonder, did he lose his survival instincts when he joined Ouroboros, or has he always been like this?

  “Let’s go. All of New London will have heard those noises.”

  Bell buzzed around my head, eyes sparkling. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

  “Ugh, fine.”

  I drew my pilfered switchblade and flipped open the black blade before drawing it along the outside of my forearm. A thin trail of purplish blood rose up from the scratch and Bell lapped greedily at the viscous fluid, until I grabbed hold of her and threw her away bodily.

  I stood on the roof’s edge and surveyed my surroundings.

  There were three connecting roofs that I could use to make my getaway. One path led back toward the Upper Quarter, towards Sammie, so that option was out. Another path led directly forward, deeper into the Middle Quarter, while my last option ran along the outer edge before seeming to terminate.

  I tapped a finger to my chin as I thought aloud. “Straight into the viper’s nest while I’ve caught them flatfooted, or circle around and enter from a sparsely patrolled location?”

  Bell pointed forward as she daintily dabbed blood off the corners of her mouth. “I vote the more interesting path! Onward, my steed, let us embark on a journey into the vast unknown!”

  I cleaned my switchblade on my cloak before stowing it away. “I guess letting them take the initiative after our first encounter would leave a sour taste in my mouth after all.”

  “However you rationalize it, let’s go already!” Bell said.

  I’d use the lag in Ouroboros’s response time to penetrate deep into the Middle Quarter. “Right, right— right away, mistress.” I took a page from Koji’s book and tipped an imaginary hat before taking off.

  I hopped to the foot-wide ledge that pointed me in the direction of my chosen path and sprinted down its length without a hitch in my step. I kept my hood lowered so my distinctive, spiky mane of white hair would be visible to any witnesses below. My approach may have been brazen, but the most important time for my enemies to see me was in this first stage.

  “Wooh-eee! Now this is exciting! This is fun, this is freedom!”

  I traversed several buildings before deciding I’d penetrated far enough into the Middle Quarter to make like smoke and disappear.

  Now that they knew my general location, Ouroboros would probably concentrate their forces and try to draw the net closed. If they trapped me inside their web at this early stage I’d be done for, no question.

  “Here’s to not taking things lying down! Here begins our strike back against circumstance!” Bell whooped.

  For some reason, an embittered smile rose on my face and stretched into a ragged grin. I swung off the edge of one building and flung myself across a ten-foot gap to the ledge of another, one story below. After spotting a window ledge, I swung to my right and dropped.

  I caught myself with a slight wince as sharp pain traveled up my arms from my fingers. I hung there for a few moments before dropping again and repeating the process. The last drop was easiest. I fell the rest of the way to the ground and rolled backwards to regain my footing.

  I pulled my hood down over my head and looked every which way to ensure I wasn’t being followed. Then I padded off into the night. Adjusting the collar of my jacket, I made sure as much of my face as possible was hidden as I traversed the Quarter at a run by way of half-remembered side streets.

  I sensed pursuit closing in behind, ahead and to the sides of me. Whenever I looked up, I saw shadowed forms leaping between rooftops.

  Bell winged her way to my side. “Looks like they’re onto us! They’re
approaching from all directions, won’t be long before they’ve got you surrounded.”

  “Thanks very much!” I waved exasperatedly mid-stride, in between pumping my arms for all they were worth.

  I could sense the net closing around me along with the cries of the pursuing hunting party, but I didn’t falter and tamped down on my rising fear. My heart was beating halfway out of my chest, and my breathing was ragged. I’d break through their net and escape into the night. I wouldn’t let it end here.

  Chapter Eight

  Some hours later and somewhere in the Lower Quarter, I escaped the hunting dogs nipping at my heels.

  I slumped over a rickety table in some rundown drinking establishment called The Wasted Minstrel that had no business being open as late as it was. But whatever they were involved in, be it smuggling operations, illegal vices, or worse, its signage didn’t have any posted connections to Ouroboros.

  I was dead tired, hungry, and dying for a drink. So, to me, it was worth a shot.

  “You’ve got to hand it to them, those guys sure are persistent~” Bell chirped from my pocket, lively as ever.

  I shifted uncomfortably in the hardwood chair and marveled at how quickly one could become accustomed to the finer things in life. Functionally speaking, I’d only spent a day at Duke Maddox’s estate, while conscious, but my aching body already missed the plush chairs. I’d been ruined in a day!

  A frothy liquid splashed from the wooden mug that was put down sloppily on the tabletop. “Hope you like ale, laddie.”

  I reluctantly removed a silver piece from my pocket. It was a lot of money, but, thanks to the Duke, I was carrying enough coin to get stabbed in an alley and left for dead many times over. “Whatever you’ve got lying around that’s warm and edible, then I don’t want to be bothered.”

  The barkeep furrowed his brow and squinted at me until I sighed and produced another piece of silver. When I put it on the table between us, I received a grudging nod in return. The barkeep slapped a huge palm over the coins and made them disappear into the folds of his apron.