She rolls her eyes at me and I lean down and kiss her, before I proceed to get her ready to get into the shower.
Lily
There’s something so intimate about another person taking the time and energy to bathe you, y’know? I mean, we’ve had some showers together in the past that were raw and downright dirty, but right now, it’s not about that. He’s almost reverent, for lack of a better word, about how he’s touching me and making sure I’m clean. He has washed my hair twice so that I don’t feel like it’s disgusting and dingy anymore. Since one arm is in a cast, the other is splinted, I’ve had to rely on others to assist me. Having your dad wash you like you were still a child is humiliating… but I took what I could. Right now, though, I’m in absolute heaven. Of course, my damn hormones are all over the place because I nearly break down in tears when he’s shaving my legs. As he leans in and kisses my stomach, he says, “I’m going to be better than my father was, peanut.” The sincerity in his voice makes my heart sing; I’ve always known he was the one for me and he’s finally gotten with the program. I’m soaring in relief and rub my hand over his head as he has a conversation with our unborn child. Witnessing him overcoming the trauma of his past, seeing the love shine in his eyes, it’s awe-inspiring and I’m grateful to be part of his healing.
Once we’re done, he gets me fully dried and then helps dress me. While I want him, hell, I always want him, right now I’m enjoying this closeness that has nothing to do with sex. “Ready to grab something to eat?” he asks.
“And face the proverbial music? Sure, I’ve been looking forward to this since I knew you were coming up,” I reply. I may be a bit snarky, though, because he chuckles then leans in and kisses my forehead. It gives me the tingles every single time his lips touch me, but I wish he’d plant those lips on mine. But beggars can’t be choosers and all of that shit, so I’ll take what he’s willing to give.
“It’s gonna be fine, baby. You’ll see,” he states. I’m glad he’s so fucking confident. Every time Gypsy or Mom mention the baby and what needs to be done, Luca positively glowers. Dad isn’t much better, but I know that he’s excited about his first grandchild. Knowing Dad the way I do, he just wishes things had happened in a different way. I know this is bringing back memories of the past for him, so I’m being patient every time he mutters something into thin air. Luca, well, he’s always been my protector in every sense of the word. When I cry he holds me, when I’m angry he beats someone up. That’s the way it’s always been; he and Tig were always watching out for us girls. The thing I can say about my family is that they may not always do things the way we want them to, but every action and word to us, and for us, is done with love.
“I hope you’re right, Maxum. I get that my ‘position’ in the club makes everyone feel like they’ve got a say-so in my life, but dammit, this doesn’t concern any of them. The brothers wouldn’t interfere with you if it wasn’t me.” I know I’m right about this because I’ve seen it happen over the years. The dance that Jaxson did regarding Ralynn. Talon and Claree and their situation. Hell, no one so much as batted an eye when Luca came home with Gypsy and her dog, for fuck’s sake! So, they need to cut us some fucking slack. There’s a pattern here, and it needs to be broken. Just because I have a vagina and not a dick doesn’t mean I don’t deserve the same treatment.
“First you’re snarky, now you’re feisty. Kind of liking this side of you, Lily,” he says. Leaning up, I nip his ear causing his eyes to glaze over with lust before he tampers it down.
“You ain’t seen nothing yet,” I caution. “I’m also overly emotional, cry at the drop of a hat, and when I’m not sick, I’m eating everything that’s not nailed down. Hell, I even ate mushrooms the other night,” I reply.
“Who are you and what have you done with my Lily?” he teases. “Because my Lily hates mushrooms even though I don’t think she’s ever tasted them.” This is true, I hate the thought of even placing one in my mouth. Usually, I’d be gagging if I saw anyone eating them. They look funny and smell atrocious. Well, that’s my opinion of them anyway.
“Maxum, they’re gross! I hate the texture.” At my outburst, he starts laughing and pulls me in for a hug.
“God, woman, I love the hell out of you. C’mon, let’s head downstairs and see what they’ve all gotta say.”
Maxum
I’m putting on a good front for her, but fuck, I’m nervous. All of my brothers know I’m seeing a therapist, but I feel like Luca and Tig will both have shit to say to me. Just hoping I can keep my cool facade going, because where my relationship with her is concerned, it’s none of their fucking business. I won’t lie either about the struggles I’ve faced and am still facing. The time for me keeping that shit buried deep down is dead and gone. I hear a noise and then hear her giggles. Looking down, I see Gypsy’s dog, Lucy, prancing alongside of us. Today, for some possessed reason, she has on one of those doggy sweaters. “They dress her?” I ask.
“Not all the time, but it’s starting to get cooler and Luca was worried she was cold, so he hit the pet store and bought her an entire wardrobe.” She’s now laughing hysterically as she tells me that because they apparently get snow up here, he also found doggy boots or some shit. I’ve seen a lot in my days, but I’ve never seen anything like how they treat this dog. She follows us into the elevator and before I can push the button, she does so, causing me to shake my head again. They say dogs are smart but I’ve never had one so I’ve never witnessed anything like I have since meeting Lucy. She’s a phenomenon to me, one I’m considering for myself.
“Ah, there you two are,” Cara says as we step off the elevator and into the common room. “We’ve got breakfast set out in the kitchen, y’all come and eat.” Yeah, we never managed to come back down last night and right now, my stomach is reminding me that it likes eating.
Keeping my arm around Lily’s waist since I can’t quite hold her hand right now, we walk into the kitchen where everyone else is sitting at the huge-ass table eating. “Morning, brother,” Axe says, looking at me. Good, he doesn’t look like he’s about to take me out back and kill me so I’ll count it as a win. “Morning, sweetheart. How’s your head today?”
“Better, Dad. Plus, I’m clean!” she replies, doing a little twirl. “I mean, it still hurts, but I don’t want to take my meds until I see a doctor because I don’t want to hurt the baby.”
“Are we seriously going to just sit here, pretend like nothing’s happened and ignore the elephant in the room?” Luca questions. I sigh because it was too good to be true.
“Luca,” Axe growls. “Now is not the time or place for you to start shit. Besides, like I’ve already said, it’s not your business.”
“Like fuck it’s not! She’s my sister, Dad.” I’ve never seen Luca so angry or speak to his dad like he is.
“And, he is one of your brothers, Luca. Loyalty, respect, honor… or have you forgotten the code we stand by? It’s her life, no one interfered in yours. Y’know, your sister doesn’t need the additional stress of anyone arguing; it’s one of her headache triggers.”
Luca’s shoulders slump a little before he glares at me. “You and I are gonna have words, brother,” he states.
“Wouldn’t expect anything less from her brother, Luca,” I admit.
“Gypsy, Lucy’s sweater today is so cute,” Lily interjects. I give her a smile at her obvious subject change.
Gypsy laughs and points at Luca. “Blame it on her daddy.”
“What? I can’t make sure our girl stays warm?” Luca asks. “Y’all fix your plates before it gets cold. Or eaten. Of course, Lily seems to have us all beat in that department lately.”
I watch her face turn red at his words referencing her appetite. I noticed during our shower the tiniest baby bump and realize that I can’t wait until she’s swollen with our baby and needs me to take care of her like I did today. Maybe other men don’t do that for their women, but for me, taking care of Lily has never been an issue, even when I wasn’t letti
ng my heart get fully involved.
After breakfast, Luca motions me into the room where they do church. I don’t miss the fact that Tig, Jaxson, and Talon follow closely behind. The only one not here is Maddox, but he’s apparently out on a job site already. Once we’re seated, I take a deep breath and remind myself that I’m becoming a new person thanks to Dr. Graves.
The door shuts and Luca takes his place at the head of the table. “Dad may say this is none of my business, but I beg to differ. Lily has always been mine to protect, and I’ve let her down where it comes to you. I’m not okay with how this has played out. I wanna know, how are you going to fix this and what are your plans regarding my sister and niece or nephew?” Right to the point, Luca’s never been one to play cat and mouse games.
“Luca, no disrespect intended, but don’t you think that’s between Lily and me?” I’m trying really hard to remember he’s my club brother.
“No, I really don't. You see, Maxum, I’m her family. You may be my brother, but right now, you’re the man who’s hurt my sister and that doesn’t sit well with me.” Jaxson shakes his head and Talon gives Luca a glare. Tig, however, looks ready for a brawl and the excitement shining in his eyes pisses me off.
“I’m seeking help, Luca. I’ve been seeing a counselor to deal with what happened to me and she’s helping me to rewire the way things cycle through my head. We’re rewiring it so to speak. Bad things happened to me growing up, things I’m just now able to share and talk about.”
“We’ve all had bad things happen to us as kids, Maxum, but I never treated Gypsy like a second-class citizen,” Luca growls.
“I’m sorry that you see things that way, Luca. But we’ll never move forward from here if you’re not letting me share my past and help me build my future. We’re family too, Luca, in case you’ve forgotten.” My irritation with him is seeping out with my words and the tone leaving my vocal cords. If he wants a fight, I’m willing to give him one, though I doubt Axe will be happy with that outcome.
11
Lily
When the guys all headed into the room and closed the door, I wanted to stomp my feet and throw a temper tantrum. How dare they interfere in my life! I’ve always been there for them to talk to without putting my fat nose into their business.
“Lily, you need to let them hash this out on their own,” Dad advises me.
“Your dad’s right, Lily. They won’t be able to let it rest or move on until they do. The best thing for you to do is concentrate on building your relationship with Maxum since y’all have a baby on the way. They’ll talk it out, deal with it, and keep on trucking like nothing ever happened,” Mom says as she takes all of the dishes and places them in the dishwasher.
“We’re starting to get into a good place, I don’t want them to push him away.” I sulk like a sullen child. “No offense to anyone, but this is about us, not anyone else. Everyone needs to mind their p’s and q’s and let us deal with our situation the way we see fit.”
Dad sighs as he runs his fingers through his beard. “Lily, what part of family don’t you understand? We meddle with the best of intentions. Honestly? I’m trying really hard here not to go all Neanderthal and pull the Dad card. I’m being patient, understanding, and am not beating that man’s ass for knocking my unmarried daughter up with my grandchild. Give us some time and patience as we figure out the new roles we are playing in your life.”
“Honey, your dad and Luca are used to being the only men in your life. They’ve always felt responsible for your well-being and ensuring your happiness. Step back, look at things from the other end of the spectrum. One day, this will be you and Maxum, how will you deal with that when the day comes?” Mom, always the voice of reason, pipes in to ask.
I think about her words for a few minutes. Sighing, I finally say, “I guess you’re right, it’s just that no one really butted their noses into anyone else’s relationship. I don’t think it’s fair that just because I’m your daughter and Luca’s sister that Maxum has to face the proverbial firing squad.”
“And once they hash shit out, they’ll step back, I’ll make sure of it,” Dad vows. “Our guys all know he’s seeing a therapist, but Luca and Tig have no idea what he’s dealt with in his past. I’m glad that Jaxson and Talon made the trip, because they’ve been beside him since he started. Hatch too, and the only reason he didn’t come is because he and DJ are watching the kids. Plus, DJ is somewhat of a wild card right now. She keeps bouncing between it being none of anyone’s business to wanting to hit him for hurting you, so it’s best that she stayed home. You have a lot of people who love you, Lily. They’ve watched you grow up, been with you all these years during your trips to the hospital or being down for days with a headache. It may not be their business, per se, but for all of them, they’ve been such a big part of your life, they feel like they should have a say-so, even if they really don’t.”
“I just don’t want to cause an issue between the brothers, Dad,” I admit. “I won’t give him up, but I also won’t have him constantly feeling like he’s under the gun. That’s not fair and it’s not right. You need to use your president’s voice and tell them all to grow the fuck up, stop acting like a bunch of nattering hens, and let us work through it with his therapist.”
Dad starts laughing. “Nattering hens? I swear, Lily, that I never know what’s gonna come out of your mouth.”
“Higher education does that for a person,” Mom replies, leaning down to kiss Dad. I turn my head when the kiss gets heated, not wanting to see their obvious display of affection. Growing up around the two of them was...interesting, to say the least. Before Nan moved out, we often found ourselves being taken to the park or out for an ice cream so that the two of them could have some ‘alone’ time. Then, when Nan moved out, they started taking long naps on the weekends! Usually, though, they’d grab a movie that we wanted to watch, all the junk food we asked for, and pizza. Luca and I finally figured out what was going on after we went through health class, a fact that still embarrasses me. I mean, they’re not ancient by a longshot, but no one wants to think of their parents having sex and the fact that they went on to have my younger brother and sister is mind-blowing.
“So, on a scale of one to ten, how are you really feeling?” Mom asks, after plopping down on Dad’s lap.
“Emotionally, I’m at the stratosphere. I know we’ve still got shit to work through, and he’s worried about being a good parent, but I reminded him he’s got some great examples in his own brothers, plus I’m going to be there as well. Physically, I’m still exhausted, even though we slept yesterday and last night away, for the most part. My headache is still there but like I said, I don’t want to take my meds until I see a doctor to make sure it won’t hurt the baby. My stitches itch and so does my casted wrist.”
Mom gives me a concerned look. “How bad’s the head, Lily?”
“Pretty bad,” I admit. “I took some Tylenol, but I’m nauseous. Only I don’t know if it’s from the concussion, a ‘normal’ headache, or morning sickness.”
“Maybe you need to lay down, then,” she replies. “I had wanted to take you, Claree, Gypsy, Maysen, and Rae shopping, but we can do that later or even tomorrow.”
“I’m not going anywhere until they’re done with their meeting,” I retort, crossing my arms over my ample chest. I know I probably look as intimidating as a gnat, especially since I’m petite and both arms are fucked up, but I’m trying to get my point across.
“It’s club…” Dad starts to say.
“It’s not fucking club business, Dad,” I rebut. “It’s my brother showing his damn ass and barking his authority, pissing on his territory, so to speak. Sorry, Gypsy.” I glance apologetically at her as she comes back into the kitchen.
“Girl, don’t apologize. I know how intense Luca can get. Trust me. Lucy is a prime example.” She waves her hand at the little dog who followed her into the kitchen and is now at her bowl eating her breakfast.
I start giggling because h
e has started a like page for Lucy on social media and posts pictures and what-not of her. Hell, she’s got more followers than I’ve got friends. How is that even possible? “As over the top as he is with her, how will he be when y’all have kids?” I muse.
She rolls her eyes before slumping in the chair. “I suspect I’ll be allowed to lift nothing heavier than a cotton ball and that’s if he allows me to even get out of the damn bed.” At her words, both Mom and Dad start to chuckle.
“Oh, honey, you’re just seeing the tip of the iceberg when it comes to how protective he is over those he loves,” Mom says.
We all sit and chat for a little longer. The more time passes, the more anxious and worried I become. What in the hell is taking those guys so long?
Maxum
I lay it all out on the table for my brothers. There are things I’m sharing that even Talon and Jaxson aren’t aware of. My past is not pretty, and now, they all know all of my deepest darkest secrets.
“Your mom just abandoned you and left you alone with that piece of shit?” Tig questions, anger evident on his face. I’m thankful that he’s feeling this deep, but I know him, and he allows his anger to override his common sense sometimes.
“She did,” I acknowledge.
“Where’s your dad now?” Luca asks. I can see a plan forming in his mind, and it worries me. He and Tig together, when pissed, can form an avalanche of epic proportions. Mother Nature doesn’t have shit on these two.
“Guys, seriously, whatever’s going through your heads, let it go. I’m getting the help I need, and I’m ready to let the past go. I need y’all to just breathe and have my back. Don’t go all rogue and search out my parents to dole out justice as you see fit.” Both of them look at me as if I’ve lost my mind for not letting them seek out some revenge on my behalf.
Maxum & Lily: Rebel Guardians Next Generation Page 8