Breaking Free

by Layla Nash

  When the hyena queen slipped out, Kaiser took up most of the space next to Nick’s bed and frowned down at him. “So you lived. The way you were acting, I didn’t expect to see you again outside of a body bag.”

  “Prepare for the worst, hope for the best,” Nick said. He laced his hands behind his head and smiled up at the alpha bear, for once his wolf not minding being under the man’s stare.

  Kaiser grunted, glancing over at the door. “Your sister is beside herself with worry, even if she won’t tell anyone. I informed Owen that you survived, so at least she knows you’re not dead. Now tell me the truth, wolf — do you intend to stay? Or are you going to disappear in the night?”

  A good question. He frowned up at the ceiling and pondered, then tilted his head at the door where Lacey had gone. “It depends. A couple of hours ago I would have said you wouldn’t even find me here, and there would have been a trail of smoke behind my ass as I got to the airport. But things might be different. I don’t know yet.”

  Kaiser snorted and rocked back on his heels, also looking at the door as Eloise continued her tirade. “Interesting. Fine. I won’t disinfect your room just yet. Make sure you say good-bye to your sister before you leave, and Josie requires a good-bye as well. She was quite adamant about that.”

  Nick smiled with half his mouth and rubbed at his eyes. “For a wee little thing, she’s fucking terrifying, man.”

  “Yes, she is, and I get to live with her, so don’t make me pay for your poor decisionmaking.” Kaiser scowled at him and smacked his arm hard enough to leave a bruise. “You hear me? Happy wife, happy life — don’t fucking mess with that equation.”

  “He won’t,” someone said from the doorway, and both men looked to see Lacey standing there. She paced into the room with deliberate steps, a bit of uncertainty in her expression. She didn’t wear it well. “We need to talk, but I won’t let him skip town without saying proper good-byes.”

  “Good.” Kaiser nodded to her and glared at Nick, then disappeared out the door to check on someone else.

  Lacey took a deep breath as she returned to her chair next to his bed. “The witch is conscious, although she’s not moving or speaking much. The doctors don’t know what it is. She said something about her energy being drained, and since she’s not very concerned, they’re going to observe her overnight and see if things improve. She wasn’t happy about being in a hospital, even a shifter hospital, but she’d have been less happy to wake up in Smith’s backyard.”

  Nick winced, thinking of the kind of favors he’d owe Deirdre for exposing her to so many supernaturals. There was the chance that Estelle wouldn’t allow Deirdre back into the cover, for fear of exposing the rest of them to anyone who might recognize Deirdre. And he’d have to cover her hospital bill, too, just in case the Chase charitable foundation didn’t cover it.

  Smith snored in the other bed, and it was the most alone they’d been in hours. Nick caught Lacey’s hand and tangled her fingers with his. He studied her hand, not her face, as he spoke. “So catch me up, girl. What the fuck is going on? You didn’t even look at me in the Alphas Council and I get knocked around a bit at Smith’s place and you’re trading wishes to save my life. Care to fill me in?”

  She frowned but didn’t pull away. “I thought I lost you. It hurt. So I asked the djinn to save you.”

  “Does that mean you believe you’re my mate?”

  “Maybe,” she said. She took a deep breath and leaned forward until her forehead rested on the mattress next to his hip.

  Nick rested his free hand on her head, massaging her scalp until she relaxed and sighed and moved so he could reach a spot behind her ear. He took a deep breath and imagined a life with her in it. Every day, every night, all the time. His voice came out rusty and a little uncertain, since he still didn’t know what she wanted. She hid too much of herself from him, even after being together and fighting and nearly dying together. “Lacey Szdoka, you’re mine. I’m yours. It doesn’t matter where I am or what I do, as long as I’m with you. If that means I’m the hyena queen’s consort for the rest of my life — great. I’ll learn to speak hyena. Whatever it means, Lacey — I’m with you.”

  She looked up at him, her expression unreadable, and held his hand a little tighter. “I abdicated.”

  Nick went still, almost certain she was fucking with him. “What?”

  “I had a family meeting before I left for Smith’s house, and I told the cackle I was leaving. Savannah will be the new queen for a while, and eventually she’ll hand it over to someone else.” Lacey took a deep breath, her eyes swimming with tears that didn’t quite spill over her lashes. “I told them I wanted better for all of us, and that it was time the Szdoka reign ended. So I’m ending it. I don’t want to be hyena queen anymore, Nick. I don’t.”

  “Oh, baby, thank God,” he said, leaning down to grab her arms so he could drag her onto the bed with him. He wrapped her in his arms and legs, holding her as close as possible while keeping their clothes on, and buried his face against her neck. “Thank you. That’s perfect. That’s wonderful. Savannah will be a great queen.”

  “Now I don’t know what to do,” Lacey whispered. “I hardly know who I am or what I want or what I like or where I should be, and it all just — I didn’t really expect to live through this, and now that we have, that we all have... what the hell am I going to do?’

  “Oh, that’s easy,” he said, and she twisted enough to glare at him. Nick smiled and took the opportunity to kiss her, even though the angle wasn’t conducive to much more than a quick little peck. “We’re going to do everything.”

  “We?” Lacey walked her fingers up his side, hitting a ticklish spot that made him twitch. “Everything?”

  Nick grumbled and held her tighter as she did it a second time. “Yes. In order to find out what you want and what you like and where you should be and who you should be, we’re going to try everything. Everywhere. Multiple times. As much as it takes, as long as it take, until you know. Until we know in our bones who we are and where we want to be.”

  Her gaze lingered on his, and for once the wolf didn’t try to shove him aside. The beast waited, content now that they had their mate close. Lacey’s expression softened and she worried her lower lip in her teeth as she studied his mouth. “Really?”

  “Really,” he said. Nick didn’t care if he got a crick in his neck; he kissed her and did a damn fine job of it.

  They were still entwined, breathing a little heavy, when a creaky voice rose up from the other bed as the ErlKing turned away. “At least draw the curtains if you’re going to do more than kiss.”

  Then he grumped back into silence. Nick started laughing hard enough to shake Lacey, who clapped a hand over his mouth so the ErlKing wouldn’t know he laughed, but Nick didn’t care. He hadn’t felt like laughing in forever, and there wasn’t much funnier than having an old pagan idol tell them to keep it in their pants. Lacey finally gave up and laughed with him, and Nick held her tighter, just to make sure she knew he, at least, knew who she was: his mate.

  The rest of it they could figure out on the way.

  Chapter Forty-four

  Lacey

  Savannah and a few of the cousins visited in the hospital after they got back from the raid, and even though Savannah wanted to break my skull for making her queen without asking, she still hugged me and whispered she was glad I pulled my head out of my ass long enough to recognize that going with Nick was the better option. Nick preened at that, so I knew I’d be hearing more about it later, and I’d have to find a creative way to pay Sav back for giving him something to tease me over.

  Then Eloise marched in, her arm bandaged and in a sling, with her husband and two of his brothers in tow, and made sure Nick and I were okay while the lions waited mostly patiently near the door. Benedict looked furious enough to chew rocks, leveling a dark gold daze at where Nick still lounged in the hospital bed. “She wouldn’t rest until she was certain you were both fine. So now that she’s see
n that, perhaps my mate will go back to bed.”

  Eloise whirled, her eyes flashing silver, and I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing as all three of the lions looked very much interested in the ceiling or floor or Smith or anywhere that wasn’t in Eloise’s line of sight. Her hand shook as she jabbed a finger at Benedict. “Look, you. I knew this bitch way before I ever knew you, and it’s hos before bros in my world right now. She needs my help and her mate needs my help and I’m going to help them whether they want it or not. I’m not made of china and I’m not going to break and yes, I may have cut myself a little deeper than I planned but that’s what stitches are for and I’ve got a sling and I’m fine. Just fine. Which you will not be if you keep bitching at me and getting in my way!”

  I blinked, sitting up from where I’d been resting next to Nick. “Did you just say ‘hos before bros’?”

  Edgar Chase looked dangerously close to laughing, rolling his lips in until they disappeared in his beard as he pinched his nose and looked at the ceiling.

  Eloise’s eyes narrowed as she turned her attention to me. “Don’t you dare. You’re not allowed to make fun. I’m still not over you letting me think you were dead for weeks on end.”

  “I’m sorry, babe,” I said, and slid to my feet so I could gingerly hug her trembling form. “I mean, ho. I’m sorry, ho. I’ll do better next time.”

  She dashed tears from her cheeks as she hugged me back and then pulled away. “Is he okay? Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine,” I said. I tilted my head at Nick, who grinned like the Cheshire cat. “And you can probably ask him yourself.”

  “Oh, I’m not speaking to him,” she said. Nick snorted at the same time Benedict did, and Eloise’s scowl turned fierce enough that her hair twisted free of its ponytail and curled around her head in snake form. I tried to smooth the snakes down but she wasn’t having it. “Everyone with a penis is getting on my nerves, Lacey. I swear to Zeus, I am going to make someone pay for all the bullshit that’s been going on lately.”

  “I’m sure you will,” I said. I frowned at Nick but hugged Eloise to my side so I would walk her over to where her mate waited closer to Smith’s bed. “He’s fine. We’re sorting out what to do next, but I should tell you before anyone else does — I abdicated the throne. Savannah is the new hyena queen as of this morning. I don’t know what I’m going to do next, but I’ll stop by when you’re feeling better so we can catch up. Okay?”

  Her eyes went wide and bright and then the tears spilled over and she nearly choked me in another hug. “I’m so happy for you! I still hate him because he’s kind of an ass, but you’re not the queen and you can finally travel and see the world and I’m so happy for you!”

  When she started bawling, I inevitably started bawling as well, and I started to agree with her ‘hating everyone with a penis’ stance as the men rolled their eyes. At least Edgar was smart enough to excuse himself into the hallway before he did so, though neither Benedict nor Atticus were clever enough to follow suit. I gave her another squeeze and helped turn her so she could notice her mate’s rolling eyes, and the tears dried up immediately. I patted Eloise’s back and promised to call her in a day or so, then she chased after Benedict and his little brother while demanding to know what they thought was so funny.

  A groan rose up from the ErlKing, and he pulled a pillow away from his face. “And to think I’d begun to forget why I didn’t like the gorgons. She is... quite a handful, that one.”

  “Yes, she is. It’s good for them. Kings of the jungle need to be reminded there are other fierce creatures in the world.” I paused near his bed, uncertain whether he wanted to talk more or just go back to sleep. Maybe he was still crazy. “Are you — well?”

  “No,” he said.

  I blinked. Well, at least he knew that. He was a step ahead of the rest of us.

  Smith didn’t bother to sit up or even open his eyes. “Most of me is focused on keeping the darkness at bay. My nature is more comfortable in a certain... mode, but it is not one that would be beneficial for this world. It is also the reason why I am shocked you found a witch willing to assist in freeing me.”

  “That’s a long story, and mostly Nick’s to tell,” I said. “Can I get you anything? Is there anything that will help you win the battle?”

  “Time,” he said. “And not being alone. I should be reminded of the way things are now, not the way things were. I am afraid my memory is not what it used to be, and after so much time in the between place...” He shivered, tensing, then his expression relaxed and he dragged the pillow back over his face, muffling his words. “It is best to be reminded of the good in the world.”

  I agreed with him wholeheartedly. I wandered back over to sit next to Nick, leaning against him as his palm rested flat on my stomach, and he smiled. “What do you want to do now?”

  “Keep Smith company for a little while,” I said, feeling exhaustion roll over me. “Take a nap, maybe. Then figure out where we’re going first.”

  “Sounds like a perfect plan.” Nick scooted over in the bed so he lay on his side and could spoon me as I crawled under the sheets, and he adjusted the pillows and everything until we were snuggled and warm on the hospital bed. He buried his nose in my hair and inhaled, and murmured something that was lost as my eyes drifted shut. Other people came and went but I hardly noticed, listening only to the steady thump of his heart and the soft rustle of his breath.

  Chapter Forty-five

  Nick

  He tolerated being at the hospital because Lacey was there and she crawled into bed with him. And he worried just a touch about Smith. Maybe the Betwixt reminded the old man of too many dark things. Nick knew perfectly well how dark things could get in your own mind, so if having Lacey and him stick around kept the darkness at bay for Smith, Nick didn’t mind.

  But when they brought a tray of hospital food by that looked more like something one of the lions coughed up, he drew the line and got up. Lacey protested but Nick dragged her close for a kiss and whispered in her ear about going home to a real bed, and she turned red and stopped arguing.

  Nick stopped by Smith’s side of the room to jostle the old man’s leg. “You going to be okay, old man?”

  “I would if certain young pups would leave me a lone,” he said, his eyes slitted as he glared at Nick.

  Nick grinned, not even the wolf reacting to the threat, and left the pudding cup from his lunch tray next to Smith’s hand. “Here. Chocolate. Your favorite.”

  Smith pushed up on his elbows to peer at the pudding and then at Nick, and his voice went gruff and a little growly. “Thank you for getting me out, young man. You did not have to take the risks you did. I will not forget.”

  Lacey sucked in a breath behind him, but Nick didn’t react. He nodded to the ErlKing, something closer to a bow, and squeezed Lacey’s hand. “Paying back the many debts I owe you, old man. Besides, I don’t leave teammates behind.”

  “I will not forget,” Smith repeated, and it rang through the air like a vow.

  It made Nick’s throat tighten, just a little. So he buried the hint of emotion in a joke, winking at the ErlKing. “Remember that when you write the check. Rest well, friend. We’ll check in on you tomorrow.”

  Smith threw the pudding cup at him as he left, so Nick was laughing as they walked out.

  Owen waited outside with one of the cars, flipping the keys around his finger as he leaned against the car and scanned the parking lot for threats. Nick made a mental note to talk to the kid about getting some therapy or anti-anxiety meds or something. According to everyone else, Kara had settled him down a lot, but Nick knew the jumpiness would never entirely leave the kid. But Owen smiled and actually looked relieved. “You’re actually alive and in one piece, hallelujah. I wasn’t sure if you’d managed to strong-arm everyone into tell us differently.”

  “The rumors of my demise were greatly exaggerated,” Nick said, making a flourish with his hands.

  Lacey rolled her eyes and shove
d him gently toward the backseat of the car. “Go sit down, Twain.”

  Owen opened the passenger side door for her, hiding a smile, though it slipped into a grin when he caught Nick’s eye. Nick snorted and lay back, closing his eyes. Whatever it was the djinn had done to save him, it felt like adrenaline highs and drunk-ass lows all mixed up at the same time. He didn’t know if his ass was coming or going.

  As he started to drive, Owen cleared his throat and spoke to Lacey, voice low. “Savannah called up to the house and said they’d packed up your things, since she didn’t think you’d want to return to the pack house. They’ll send your stuff wherever you want it; we have plenty of room, so they’re going to deliver it to the warehouse later tonight. Kaiser thought that would be okay.”

  Lacey nodded, a curious tension running through her, and Nick reached between the seats so he could catch her arm and squeeze. She chuckled, reaching back to pat his stomach, but her voice sounded odd when she finally spoke. “I guess I’m homeless now. I hadn’t quite thought that far ahead, to be honest. Where does a deposed queen live?”

  “In my basement,” Nick grumbled. “Well, in my cell in the basement. You can give Kaiser a piece of your mind about not being in a fancier suite, since he never gave a shit about my complaints, but I’m not sure we want to occupy the guest room in his apartment. They’ve got soundproofing but those kids are loud.”

  Owen laughed but didn’t look at either of them. “I’ll drop your ass at a hotel, Nick. Just say the word.”