“I’ve wanted things to be different,” he said. “Like they were before, back home.”
“We’ll never have that again,” Mom said. “It’s gone, not just for us, for everybody. We’re the lucky ones, Jon. Think of it. You have your brother and your sister. Gabe, too, and Lisa. Lisa’s been wonderful, and I want you to tell her how grateful, how eternally grateful I am to her. Love them, Jon, because they’re your family and they’re good, loving people. Your father loved you so much, and I love you so much. Never forget that.”
“I know,” Jon said. “I love you, Mom. And I need you. Promise me you’ll be all right.”
“All I can promise is that I’ll try,” Mom said. “Promise me you’ll try, also, Jonny.”
“I promise,” Jon said.
Mom kissed him and then got up. “The guard’s waiting for you,” she said. “Do whatever Dr. Goldman and Lisa tell you. Please see Miranda, and let her know I’m all right. I don’t want her to worry about me.”
Jon stood and embraced his mother. “We’ll make it through this,” he said. “I promise.”
“Go,” Mom said. “And remember how much I love you.”
Jon left Mom in the bedroom. He walked out of the apartment, down the stairs, past the dead bodies. The guard followed him as he walked.
In a couple of hours he’d be home. Back to the house in Sexton where there were domestics to look after him and always enough to eat. Back to the life everyone had sacrificed for so that he might have a home and food and a real chance at a future.
I’ll be good, he promised them all, he promised himself. I’ll make you proud.
Monday, July 6
Jon found Carrie in the kitchen when he went downstairs for breakfast.
“How do you like your eggs?” she asked. “Scrambled?”
“Yeah,” Jon said. “Where’s Val?”
“I don’t know,” Carrie said. She broke two eggs into a bowl, poured some goat’s milk in, and began beating them.
“I thought you and Val took the bus together Mondays?” Jon said.
“Look,” Carrie said, turning to face him. “I walk to Val’s house Monday mornings and we take the bus together. Only this morning I couldn’t. The guards herded us like cattle to the terminal. They frisked us before we got onto the buses, and I was stopped four times walking from the terminal to here. That’s all I know.”
“Did you tell Lisa you don’t know where Val is?” Jon asked.
Carrie poured the eggs in the pan. “Yes, I told her. She said I should assume Val wouldn’t be coming, and for the time being I should do her work as well as mine.”
Lisa had been in a terrible mood when Jon had gotten home the day before. She’d yelled at Jon because he hadn’t let her know he was all right. Then she said work was going to be a nightmare because, from what she was hearing, there were hundreds, possibly thousands dead in White Birch, and that meant any number of houses in Sexton would be without one or more of their domestics, and they’d be calling her to demand she replace the ones who were gone.
Jon began to eat. If Val was missing, then Carrie was their only domestic, at least until Miranda had her baby. And if Lisa had to send Carrie to some other claver’s home, then Miranda would be their only one, cleaning the house, doing the cooking, looking after Gabe and her own baby.
There’d be no avoiding her then. She’d sleep in the nursery and clean Jon’s room and make his meals and be some bizarre combination of his domestic and his sister.
It was one thing for Mom to tell him to love Miranda. It was another to want her in his home, reminding him, without saying a word, that he had all the advantages she didn’t, her baby didn’t.
And he’d never be able to forget Julie with her killer in his home.
He walked over to Sarah’s house, trying not to think about any of that. But Sarah’s mood didn’t make things better.
“They won’t let us open the clinic,” she said. “No one from Sexton is allowed into White Birch.”
“They’ve let the grubs come here,” Jon said. “Carrie’s here but not Val.”
“Two of our domestics are missing,” Sarah said.
“Missing isn’t dead,” Jon said.
“Yes it is,” Sarah said. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe not. I don’t know anything about them. They’ve been working for us, living with us for months, and I don’t know anything about them.”
“They don’t want you to know,” Jon said. “They hate us. We give them just enough food to live, and we make them do whatever we need, and they have no choice but to put up with it. The only thing left to them is a little bit of privacy.”
Sarah stared at him. “You’ve changed,” she said.
“Trust me,” Jon said. “I liked it the way it was. I liked having Val do all the housework and Carrie taking care of Gabe so I didn’t have to. I liked feeling it was okay for me to eat real food and have clean clothes and clean air to breathe. Okay? That’s how it was when I was a kid. Without the grubs, but all the rest of it: food and clothes and air. Then for two years I lived in hell. Everyone did, I know that. But I got offered a way out and I took it, and got food and clothes and clean air. I’m not going to apologize for liking it. You like it. We all like it.”
“Do you think someday everyone will have that?” Sarah asked. “Will there ever be enough for all of us?”
“I don’t know,” Jon replied. “Maybe someday if we figure out how to share. Mom thinks things are going to get worse around here, though.”
“Daddy won’t say it,” Sarah said. “But I can tell that’s what he thinks.”
“They’re afraid for us,” Jon said. “They have been for four years now. They don’t know how not to be afraid.”
“I’m afraid, too, Jon,” Sarah said.
Jon held her tight. “We’ll make it,” he said. “I promise you.”
But when they got to school, Jon began to doubt he could keep that promise, any promise. He’d never seen the school so heavily guarded. And none of the students were laughing, or even talking.
They were told to go directly to the auditorium. Luke saw Jon and Sarah and walked in with them.
The middle school students were there along with the high schoolers, seated in their own section. Jon looked around. Tyler wasn’t there, and neither was Zachary.
The students stood and sang “The Star-Spangled Banner.” Then Mr. Morrow, principal of all the Sexton students from kindergarten through high school, told them to continue standing for a moment of silence in memory of all who had died on Saturday.
“These are difficult and frightening times,” Mr. Morrow said after everyone was seated. “The Sexton school system has suffered great loss. Miss Wilkins, the second grade teacher, is missing and presumed dead. Mr. Donnelly, who teaches English in middle school, is known dead. He died saving the lives of our students. His courage will long be remembered.”
Jon took Sarah’s hand and held on to it.
“Four students died on Saturday,” Mr. Morrow continued. “Jennifer Simms, a fourth grader, was trampled to death at the stadium. Seventh grader Michael Davies was separated from his parents. He was found shot to death on the playing field.”
The guards killed him, Jon thought, but he knew no one would ever admit that.
“Tyler Hughes and Zachary Wright, two of our most popular students, were murdered,” Mr. Morrow said. “It seems a mob grabbed Tyler, and when Zachary ran to get help, another mob found and killed him.” He paused. “I’ve been told there will be funerals for all who died, but not until the end of the week. Their bodies have been recovered and are in Sexton, but with so many deaths, it will take time before all the arrangements can be made.”
“They need grubs to dig the graves,” Luke whispered.
Jon thought of all the bodies he’d seen in White Birch, grubs who’d be tossed in body pits and cremated without anyone to witness and grieve. Then he thought of Tyler and what his parents must have felt when they saw what had been done to their
son.
“I want to take a moment to praise the many students who stood their ground against the mob and helped women and children make their way safely back to Sexton,” Mr. Morrow said. “Five of the Sexton soccer team were students here. Now there are three. Would those three fine young men please stand? They represent what’s best in Sexton.”
Jon had no desire to stand, and he could see how uncomfortable Luke was. But Ryan, in the row ahead of them, stood, and reluctantly Jon and Luke rose as well.
It was a nightmare hearing the students and faculty cheering for them. Jon sat as soon as he possibly could, and Luke joined him. A moment later Ryan also sat.
“I didn’t do anything,” Luke whispered. “I got on a bus right away. Ryan did, too. We were too scared to stay.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Jon said. “They need heroes. We’re it.”
“After this assembly, guards will escort you to your buses,” Mr. Morrow said. “School will be closed until next Monday so that you can attend the funerals of your friends and fellow students.”
Jon spotted Alex on one of the buses. It made him feel better. But when he got home, he found Carrie on her hands and knees scrubbing the kitchen floor while Gabe jumped up and down, screaming for attention.
“What’s going on?” Jon asked.
“Val’s not here,” Carrie said. “Someone has to do the work.”
Gabe turned his attention to Jon. “Play with me!” he screamed. “I hate Carrie! She won’t play with me!”
“Stop it,” Jon said sharply. “Carrie, your job is to take care of Gabe.”
“You think I don’t know that?” she said. “I’m doing what Mrs. Evans told me to do. I don’t have four hands.”
“I’m sorry,” Jon said. “It came out wrong. You take care of Gabe. I’ll do the scrubbing.”
Carrie stared at him. Gabe continued to scream.
“I’m getting the best of it,” Jon said. “Give me the scrub brush.”
Carrie stood up. “Do you know how to scrub a floor?” she asked.
“No,” Jon said. “But it’s about time I learned.”
Tuesday, July 7
“I want you to go to the hospital,” Lisa said at breakfast.
Jon wanted to whine, “Do I have to?” but knew better. Lisa was exhausted. She’d gotten home from work at ten o’clock the night before and had told Jon she expected to keep those hours for the rest of the week at least.
“Four hundred twenty-two domestics didn’t show up for work yesterday,” she said. “Roughly three hundred families are short at least one grub, and trust me, they need their grubs. Air purifiers can do only so much. Nineteen families don’t have working washing machines, and they each need one grub just for laundry. Carrie, this floor is filthy. I thought I told you to wash it.”
“I washed it,” Jon said. “I’ll do a better job today.”
“It’s not your responsibility to scrub the floors,” Lisa said.
“It’s not Carrie’s, either,” Jon said. “It’s Val’s, and she’s not here. I don’t have school until Monday. I can do some housework until then.”
“Do it better, then,” Lisa said. “And visit Miranda. That is your responsibility. Carrie, for the time being, you’re the only domestic in this house. You want to eat? You do the work.”
“Yes, Mrs. Evans,” Carrie said.
Lisa sighed. “I know Gabe’s a handful,” she said. “I know I’ve spoiled him rotten. His father’s gone, and I’m at work six days a week, and I can’t bring myself to say no to him during the little time we have together. And you’ve done wonders with him. You, too, Jon. He’s a sad and lonely little boy, and I don’t know how to make things better for him.”
“I don’t think you can,” Jon said.
“Probably not,” she said. “I’ve got to go. Tell Gabe I love him, and I’ll see him tonight. Only I won’t. I won’t get back here until after his bedtime. Tell him when I get home, I’ll wake him up with a kiss.” She got up to leave. “Jon, go to the hospital. Find out how Miranda is doing,” she said again. “And help Carrie out. Play with Gabe so she can do the housework.”
“I will,” Jon said. “I’ll see you tonight.”
Lisa bent over and gave him a kiss. “You’re a good boy, Jon,” she said. “Give Miranda my love. Tell her we’re counting the minutes until she gets here.”
Jon went upstairs, woke Gabe, and helped him get dressed. He brought him to the kitchen and sat with him while Carrie made his breakfast. When Gabe was through eating, he and Jon went upstairs and played every game Gabe could think of. Carrie cleaned the house and made their lunch.
“I’m going to the hospital,” he told Carrie, after putting Gabe to bed for his afternoon nap. “I’ll stay with Gabe when I get back.”
“Thank you, Jon,” Carrie said. “See you later.”
Jon got a bus that took him to the hospital neighborhood. He couldn’t get over how many guards were in town. Did they really think the grubs were going to rise up in revolt? Or was it just to make the clavers feel safer?
Miranda was lying in bed when Jon got there. She looked good, better than Carrie and Lisa did.
“Jon!” she said. “Oh, I’m so glad to see you. I know something’s going on, but I don’t know what, and I haven’t seen Lisa since last week. Is everyone all right? I’ve been so worried.”
“Everyone’s fine,” Jon said. “I saw Mom on Saturday. Sunday, too. And I saw Alex yesterday, driving a bus.”
“Lisa?” Miranda said. “Gabe?”
Jon laughed. “They’re fine, too,” he said. For a moment Miranda was just Miranda, his big sister, the one who’d teased him, the one he’d driven crazy. Just for a moment, though. Then he remembered Julie and what Miranda had done to her. He didn’t want to, but he edged away.
“What’s the matter?” Miranda said. “Sit down, Jon, and tell me what’s going on. I know you’re keeping something from me.”
Jon sat on a straight-back chair against the wall. “Things went crazy in White Birch this weekend,” he replied. “Bad crazy. But Mom’s fine. Nothing happened to her. And Alex is on the job, so he’s okay, too.”
“The nurses used to pop in on me all the time,” Miranda said. “Orderlies, too. The past couple of days I’ve hardly seen anyone. Oh, they’re taking good care of me, and I know how lucky I am to be here. But something’s wrong. Things are too quiet.”
“A lot of people who live in White Birch are missing,” he replied. “Some of them died, but a lot of them probably packed their bags and left. Lisa’s going crazy trying to replace the domestics. That’s why she hasn’t seen you. She got home after ten o’clock last night, and she says it’s going to be like that all week.”
“But Mom’s all right,” Miranda said. “And Alex.”
“I spent the weekend with Mom,” Jon said. “She sends her love. She wishes she could be here, but there’s no way she can get a pass. And Alex is back at work, so he’s okay, too. We all are, Miranda. We’re just waiting for you to have the baby.”
“Is it okay with you?” she asked. “Me working for Lisa?”
It wasn’t, but there was nothing Jon could say. “Lisa thinks it’s a great idea,” he said. “Val’s missing, so things are kind of hard. We could use a helping hand.”
“I like Lisa,” Miranda said. “Gabe’s a handful, but he’s my brother and I love him. I’m hoping to be out of here in a week. The baby’s kicking up a storm. It’s ready to be born, I’m sure of it.”
Jon looked at his watch. “I told Carrie I’d be home soon,” he said. “She has all the housework and Gabe, and that’s too much for her. I’d better go.”
“Will you come back?” Miranda asked. “Will I see you again?”
“I don’t know,” Jon said. “With school and soccer and helping out with Gabe, I don’t have much time.”
Miranda smiled, but there was no warmth in it. “You’re a good claver, Jon,” she said. “You do all the right things.”
“Th
is isn’t my fault,” Jon said. “I didn’t ask for any of this.”
“I didn’t, either,” Miranda said. “Okay, Jon. Go. You did your duty. The next time I see Mom, I’ll tell her what a good boy you are.”
“Go to hell,” Jon said. He walked out of the room, paying no heed to Miranda calling his name.
Wednesday, July 8
When the phone rang, Jon figured it was Lisa calling from work. Carrie was putting Gabe to sleep, but Lisa probably wanted to wish him good night over the phone.
But it was Alex.
“Miranda’s all right,” Jon said. “I saw her yesterday.”
“That’s not what I’m calling about,” Alex said. “Do you know where Laura is?”
“Mom?” Jon said. “Why? What’s the matter?”
“I don’t know,” Alex said. “Maybe nothing. But I got home from work and she wasn’t there. That’s not like her. I thought maybe you’d gotten her into Sexton.”
“You know we can’t,” Jon said. “Maybe Mom’s visiting people.” He remembered the dead bodies in front of the apartment and started to feel sick. “Look, Alex, if Mom comes home, could you let me know?”
“Not today,” Alex said. “Curfew’s in five minutes. I’m already taking a chance calling. I’ll talk to you tomorrow night. Or if Laura gets back, I’ll have her call you tomorrow.”
Jon could hear sirens in the background. “Gotta go,” Alex said. “Curfew.”
Alex was a worrier, Jon told himself. Even Mom thought he was paranoid.
But Mom also thought she might never see Jon again. Someone had gone into her apartment and stolen her food. Someone had slaughtered her downstairs neighbors.
He picked up the phone and called Sarah.
“Is something the matter?” she asked as soon as she heard his voice.
“Yes,” Jon said. “No. I don’t know. Look, is your father going to White Birch tomorrow? Is the clinic open?”
“Yes,” Sarah said. “I’m going, too. It’s a good excuse not to go to Zachary’s funeral.”
Shade of the Moon ls-4 Page 14