My Serenity

by M. Clarke

  To the left was the bar, sectioned off from the dining area. The dining area was open and square shaped, giving a view of everyone in the restaurant. Mama Rose was located near the college campus, attracting a lot of young customers. It became a regular hang out for many groups, especially fraternities and sororities. Every time I walked in, I became nostalgic with memories of my college years.

  “Hello, Seth,” one of the waitresses greeted me just as I walked in.

  “Hey, Debbie. How was this morning?”

  Debbie was not only the oldest, but she had also been employed with us the longest. My mom trusted her with her own life. I trusted her to open the restaurant in the morning so I didn’t have to get in so early.

  Debbie pushed her blonde hair behind her shoulders and frowned slightly. The wrinkles on her forehead deepened, and for the first time I could see the white roots of her hair. “Busy as always, Seth. I can’t complain. Tips are great.”

  “Good. I’ll be in the office. Can you direct the interviewees there, please?”

  Debbie leaned into her hip with a smile. “Will do, boss.”

  Debbie was at least double my age. Having been taught to respect my elders, I felt uncomfortable being called “boss” by her. “Don’t call me that. I’m not your boss, Debbie. I’m—”

  “Younger than me?” She winked and then lightly snapped the rag towel in her hand to my leg. “Get going.”

  “Yes, boss,” I said with a grin, then got my legs moving.

  “Seth. How’s your mom?”

  Her question caused me to halt and turn. With a small smile I said, “Hanging in there.”

  “I know that feeling,” She sighed with a twitch of her lips.

  I was such an ass. I had forgotten she had lost her husband a couple of years ago to cancer. “Does it get easier?”

  “Bearable.” With a sympathetic smile, she walked away.

  I walked out of the office after the last interview and headed to the front. Spotting Lexy and Josie already seated, my heart raced with excitement, mostly from seeing Josie. Whipping back to the kitchen, I walked out with a white apron around my waist and casually strode to the table.

  “How can I help you, ladies?” I greeted.

  Josie swung around at the sound of my voice. What happened next was not intentional. In fact, she had no idea what she had done—at least I thought not, and she hadn’t apologized. That would have made me turn red. It happened so fast. Her arm brushed against the apron, sliding across the perfect spot. Thank goodness I had control, or there would have been an unexpected bump underneath it.

  “Seth,” she said, breaking me out of the “holy crap” moment. Her tone came out of her mouth like a perfect melody, the song she had sung many times in sixth grade. “I thought your parents owned this restaurant. I didn’t know you worked here too.”

  “I’m helping out. We’re shorthanded,” I answered, staring at her soft curls that I wanted to run my hands through. “What would you like to eat? It’s on the house.”

  “No, no, no.” Josie frowned. Her lips were a pretty pink. I wanted to bite them, just like she was doing now.

  A hand waving caught my attention. “I’m here too, Seth.” Lexy narrowed her eyes at me playfully. She leaned into Josie. “I should come with you more often. Seth never offered me a meal on the house before.”

  “That’s not true,” I retorted. I didn’t want Lexy to make it sound like I was doing them a favor because of Josie. “I never served you before. And I’m pretty sure my mom did, and also gave you a discount.”

  Lexy folded the menu and handed it to me, looking defeated. “Yeah, you’re right. Since you’re taking our order, I’d like to order the prime rib house special with baked potato and broccoli.”

  “That sounds good. I’ll order the same,” Josie said.

  “How would you like your prime?” I asked.

  “I like mine big, thick, and juicy,” Lexy giggled, waggling her brows at Josie.

  Oh God! I rolled my eyes at her and let out a quick snort.

  Josie lightly shoved Lexy. “Dirty mind. No wonder I like you.” She snorted then answered my question, “Medium.”

  “Sorry,” Lexy added. “I couldn’t resist.”

  I smiled again, shaking my head. “Two medium prime rib house specials coming up.” I backed away, smiling at Josie, feeling my lips plastered to my teeth. Hopefully it wasn’t a dorky smile. I couldn’t help myself. I saw a sunrise behind her. God, she was beautiful. I could stare at her all day—and I think I was, a bit longer than I should have. I finally turned to walk away—then, smack!

  Josie

  Oh crap! My arm rubbed against Seth’s apron. It was a fast glide, but I felt the thickness of his jeans, and though I couldn’t feel what was underneath them, just the thought of my arm touching that precise spot made me quiver and turn red. I hoped he didn’t think I did it on purpose.

  “Seth,” I called. My pitch rose higher than expected. Embarrassed, I flashed my eyes to the menu and pretended I was looking at it, but continued to talk to relieve the heat on my face. “I thought your parents owned this restaurant. I didn’t know you worked here too.”

  “I’m helping out. We’re shorthanded,” Seth said. His eyes shifted to my hair and fell down to my tank top that showed a little tease of my cleavage. Was he checking me out?

  Since Seth didn’t mention anything about my arm caressing inappropriately, I figured it didn’t faze him. Thank God! That would have been embarrassing as hell.

  When he turned his attention to Lexy, I stared at his broad shoulders, comparing them to when he was in sixth grade. There was a big difference—a big yummy difference. He was turning me on from the way he leaned in, positioning himself like a model, even though he had no idea that he was. That was what I loved about Seth, always humble and innocent. Nothing was intentional; it was all him—who he was.

  Though his facial structure had changed, I could still see his sixth-grade face. He still had that sweet, genuine smile, the kind of smile that made you feel like he was your best friend. His green eyes were the purest shade of green, twinkling like precious stones, and I could stare at them all day. And his lips—so succulent. I bet they tasted just how I imagined—soft, tender, and juicy.

  After we ordered, Seth repeated, “Two medium prime rib house specials coming up.” He backed away slowly, smiling a little bit longer at me. He looked so darn cute with his eyes wide and holding a dorky grin. I couldn’t look away. When he finally turned—SMACK!

  Seth ran into a waitress who was holding a tray full of glasses filled with water. Water gushed down between them, falling down like rain and soaking most of Seth’s white work T-shirt. Painful sounds shot in the air as glasses shattered on the floor. Seth stood there looking defeated while the waitress walked away. Most likely she was getting help. I could understand why Seth couldn’t move. The shock of that much cold water at once would do that to anyone.

  “Seth?” I got out of my chair, but by that time, employees were coming to the rescue so I sat back down. Seth turned to Lexy and me with an adorable frown. I was sure he was blushing red from the embarrassment, but the cold was probably preventing that from happening.

  He came toward us with a wide grin, shivering. Tugging on his wet shirt, he let go, only to have it cling back to his chest, framing his muscular physique. I couldn’t help but stare, quivering from lust…Then there was his unforgettable smile—the smile that had stayed with me since sixth grade.

  “Great show, Seth,” Lexy smirked. She was trying hard not to laugh, but I’d heard strange sounds escaping from her mouth.

  Seth lifted his hands with a shrug. “Well, when you come to Mama Rose while I’m working, you get a free wet T-shirt show.” He rolled his eyes. “It felt like I swam in a pool of ice. Anyway, I better go change.”

  I watched his fine tight ass walk away, wondering how he felt about me. And I didn’t know why those thoughts invaded my mind. The truth was, I wanted him to adore me the way he
did in sixth grade.

  CHAPTER 9

  Seth

  Josie was the last person on earth I thought I would ever see again, and here she was. And I never thought a feeling so old, buried deep within, could resurface with just one look, one smile. But things were a lot different now. We no longer had the sweet sixth-grade mentality. We were older and wiser. And Josie, she was a woman now, with a grown-up body and perfect curves in every possible place. She had blossomed into a beautiful rose. But did she have thorns, and if so, how sharp were they?

  Asking a girl out on a date had never been a problem for me, especially since I hadn’t asked that many before. Most of the time, they would ask me out. Yeah, I sucked at it. I wished I had Elijah’s confidence and his charisma. It was so natural for him. I had no idea how he did it. Maybe I could ask him? Before I could stop myself, I texted him: What are you doing?

  He answered back almost immediately: I just walked in from work. Waiting for Alex.

  I needed his advice. Can I stop by?

  My door is open.

  I typed quickly before pocketing my phone: I’ll come by after work.

  After Lexy and Josie left and my shift was over, I headed to Elijah’s. I didn’t know why I was so apprehensive about going to his place when I had been there thousands of times. Maybe going with a purpose triggered an uneasy feeling. Although I thought of Elijah like a brother, asking for his tips on how to ask a girl out—well, was not a manly thing, I supposed. Oh, what the hell, it was going to be better than the sex talk we’d had with my dad.

  The door pushed open wider when I knocked on it. Elijah was most likely doing something that prevented him from opening the door. A few seconds later, he came out of his bedroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. “You trying to seduce me?” I chuckled.

  “Ha, ha. You wish.” Elijah twitched his brows. “I left the door open, just in case you came by when I was in the shower.”

  I closed the door behind me. “So the whole world could walk right in? You crazy? I could’ve waited.”

  “Don’t lecture me, Dad,” he mocked playfully.

  Elijah went back to his room while I plopped onto the sofa and spread my legs out on the coffee table. Soon after I had finished texting Sara to let her know I would be home shortly, Elijah walked out, a bit more dressed up than his usual jeans and T-shirt.

  I placed my arms behind my neck and leaned back into the sofa. “Got all dressed up for me. Why, Elijah, you shouldn’t have.”

  “I always look nice for you, Seth. So, what’s up?” He sat across from me.

  Thinking about asking Elijah for tips had played out differently in my mind. Why was I so nervous? “Nothing. I just came by.” I turned away, focusing on my shoes.

  Elijah leaned forward and folded his hands. “You know you can tell me anything, don’t you? Is your mom okay?”

  “Taking one day at a time, just like the rest of the family, but I didn’t come to see you because of my mom.”

  Elijah leaned back into his sofa, looking more relaxed. His eyes scanned me with a mysterious grin, and he said one word that threw me for a loop, “Josie.”

  “Huh? What about Josie?” I tried to play it cool, but Elijah could read me so well. This wasn’t working.

  “I knew it.” Elijah nodded, looking elated or like one of those toys that bobbed nonstop.

  “You knew that?” I pretended not to understand even though I knew. God, I hoped I wasn’t turning red because I felt my blood rushing to every inch of my body.

  “You might not want to admit it, but you have it bad for her,” he said.

  I looked away. “Maybe,” Breathing in the silence, I finally spoke up. Elijah was still sporting the same darn grin, waiting patiently for me to confess. One way or another, he would get it out of me. “Okay.” I felt my body slump. “I think I like her, but I’m not sure if it’s because I liked her in sixth grade, or because she disappeared one day and there was no closure, or I really do like her.”

  Elijah leaned into me, his face more serious than a second ago. “Whoa—wait. Back up. What do you mean she disappeared? She was kidnapped?”

  “No. It’s really weird.” I tried to recall the details, but they were hazy. “She gave me her phone number on a piece of yellow sticky paper, gave me my first kiss, and then I never saw her again after that. She didn’t come back to school the next day or any day after. It was like she had disappeared off the planet.”

  “Did you call the number?”

  “I did, but there was no answer.” I sighed, remembering the feelings of loss and confusion the day I had called her. I had waited three days after the day she didn’t show up for school.

  “Did you ask her about it?”

  “No. We didn’t get a chance to talk. I figured I could when we go camping this weekend.”

  Elijah leaned back into the sofa. “Seth, Seth, Seth. You mean to tell me you couldn’t ask her out for lunch or dinner to catch up? You’ve got it bad, bro. You’re avoiding her.”

  “I’m not.” I let out a light chuckle, but I think it came out more like a snort.

  Elijah practically jumped out of his seat and sat next to me. “Look. I get it. I had a hard time asking Alex out. It’s nerve racking, even for me.” He pointed at himself with a look of confidence that only made me laugh, because Elijah knew how to play it off well. It didn’t come out arrogantly. “So, let’s pretend I’m Josie. Ask me out.”

  I pulled away from him, giving him a strange look. “You’re kidding, right?”

  “Practicing will make it easier.” He shrugged. “Just saying.”

  I thought about it for a second. “Okay.” I turned my body to face Elijah head on. Pretending he was Josie, I said, “Hey, Josie. Would you like to go out to dinner with me?”

  Elijah pointed to his chest, looking stunned or more like giving me a bonehead look, exaggerating his gestures by batting his eyelashes. If he continued to act like that, I was going to burst out laughing.

  “Why, Seth. That’s so sweet of you, but the answer is…no.”

  I blinked my eyes, wondering if I’d heard correctly, and I had. “Elijah,” I spat, throwing a light punch to his arm. Could he have any more muscles? It was hard as a rock. “What the fuck you mean, no?” I started laughing so hard. “You’re supposed to give me confidence, not shoot me down. I feel like crap.”

  Elijah lifted his head from the palms of his hands. He was laughing so hard that he had slumped over the arm of the sofa. When he finally calmed down he said, “That was so boring. Why should she say yes? You haven’t seen her in years and that’s how you’re going to ask her out?”

  I sighed. “I suck at this. How would you do it?”

  Elijah sat up tall, looking serious. “I’m going to call you Alex.” He cleared his throat. “Alex, it’s been so long. We need to catch up. I want to know what you’ve been doing all these years. I know a great place. If you’re free this weekend, let me take you out.”

  I looked at him like I was looking at my idol. “That was awesome. That’s the reason why you have a girlfriend and I don’t. I’m going to have to use that line.”

  “Go for it.”

  I stared into space for a second and spoke again, “Okay, confession time. As you already know, I haven’t kissed a girl in a while, so…when is the right time to do it? Not the first date for sure. Second? Third?”

  “Never set a time frame. It will happen when you think it’s right. She might make the first move. Who knows? But let me show you a trick.” Elijah leaned closer, almost touching his leg against mine. “Pretend you’re watching a movie. Put your left arm behind her, along the chair so she doesn’t feel it, but knows it’s there. You’re building the anticipation. Then move your body at an angle, just like how I’m doing right now.”

  “Okay,” I said with hesitation.

  “It would be perfect if the movie is scary or funny. If it’s scary, she will naturally lean into you. That’s when you bring your arm around her
to close in. If it’s funny, laugh with her, but lean toward her as you enclose her in your arms. Get it? Try it on me. Pretend I’m Josie, but don’t kiss me.” He chuckled.

  “Shut up.” I laughed with him, but I was thankful. Elijah and I were close that way and could joke with each other. I couldn’t recall any talks about how to ask a girl out with my own brother. “Okay.” I let out a snort, thinking how ridiculous this was, but at the same time I knew it would help me.

  “I’m waiting. Can’t make your date wait too long,” Elijah whined like a girl.

  I pursed my lips, trying not to crack up, and placed my right arm behind him. Hopefully, I wouldn’t be as stiff with Josie as I was now.

  “Set the scenario,” Elijah said.

  “We’re watching a scary movie. I think Josie is the type of girl that could handle scary movies.”

  When Elijah leaned into me with his head down, I enclosed him in my arms. Just then, Alex walked through the door. Her eyes met mine, looking confused, and then shifted to Elijah. Not only did my face turned red, my whole body blazed in heat from embarrassment. Releasing my arms, I said, “Hi Alex. It’s not what you think.”

  Elijah shot up and released a boisterous laugh that filled the room. “I’m showing Seth—” He couldn’t stop laughing. He couldn’t talk. “Josie— He—” He continued to laugh.

  Walking to the dining table, Alex shook her head, laughing too. The three of us laughed so hard, to the point where Elijah fell off the sofa, Alex dropped her keys, and I grabbed my stomach from the ache. Now it had become more of a contagious laugh that was hard to contain. Finally, when it came to a halt, I wiped my tears. I couldn’t recall when I’d laughed so hard I was crying.

  “Do I need to be jealous of Seth?” Alex bit her lip. “I knew eventually he would be my competition.”

  “Well, Elijah did walk out with only a towel around his waist for me,” I teased.

  “Did he now?” She drawled out the words like a jealous girlfriend.

  “Elijah was giving me pointers and I was practicing on him,” I explained frantically, though I had no clue why I was acting like the other woman.